skier

For 25 000$ would you go fight a panda bear with a baseball bat?

Remember it's still a bear, despite it's cuddly appearance in zoos and the like.

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Tophat665

Add another zero and you have a deal. As long as I have the baseball bat.

<pedantic>And it's not a bear; it's a procyonid, like a raccoon.</pedantic>

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lukethebandgeek

Yes. I would. I would fight a pissed off panda bear for money.

What? They're practically extinct anyways.

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Tophat665

This kind of thing could lead to a pandemic of pandemonium. Or it could just be a flash in the panda.

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Sion

I would do it one two conditions:

1. I get the money before I step into the ring with the Panda. That way I can give it to the wife for safe keeping, in case I get killed.

2. Treatment for any and all injuries I sustain are paid for by the even organizer/promoter, to include funeral expenses, if necessary.

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Munku

Puhlease! I would tear that panda to peices! He charged me I'd crack his skull into peices! PSHAW! Sign me up!

KirStang

Depends on how big the panda is...

Fremen

All you'd have to do would be to distract it with a bamboo branch and then bumrush the fuck out of it.

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Zubon

I like the image of a panda with with a baseball bat. *pat pat* "So you thought you got it? No, you get the money."

Averett

Well, do I have to win? How long is the fight? One blow to the Panda's head and I can book it to the nearest exit?

We need ground rules here, Don King.

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moonstrucksoul

no way, not a panda. but with human, hell yeah. I'd do it for $5000

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stonegrody

I have a theory that I could take a small black bear. A panda bear is not too much bigger so I think I could do it. I'd ask for the $25K+Medical expenses.

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Crack

I think the real question should be, "Would the panda fight me for $25000?"

I don't think it would...

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Fly

see............the baseball bat refers too the size of the doobie i'd spark up w/ said bear....we'd talk and shit,...then maybe light another one.....he'd be tweaked outta shape in no time and i'd walk away with the cash just chucklin' to myself.



easy as pie ......


where do i sign?

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Fire

why not- they got some teeth, but I could use the money

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skier

Ok since you asked for ground rules, here they are:
1. It is a fight to the death. The bear kills you or you kill the bear. (two will enter, one will leave)
2. You get a baseball bat to beat up the enraged panda.
3. If you win, you get 25,000$ (but if you lose, you get NOTHING because you're dead.)
4. The panda is angry. It will not listen to reason, narcotics, or foodstuffs. It's just you, a baseball bat, and an angry panda bear.


Depending on the responses, I might propose another unlikely matchup.

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Averett

Hmm... to the death. With an angry panda. But panda's are never angry! They're too cute for all that!

I'd do it. Fuck that panda, I need $25,000.

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Redlemon

Are all panda species endangered? Would I have to fight off any environmentalists afterward in order to claim the prize?

skier

I'll deal with any whining environmentalists. You can fight the endangered panda without outside interference.

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"Asking a bomb squad if an old bomb is still "real" is not the best thing to do if you want to save it." - denim

Averett

Wait, wooden or aluminum bat?

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skier

I think wooden, but I don't know which one would work better. We'll try them both out on you, just to be sure.

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KellyC

Assume I can beat up the panda and kill it, do I have to stop the moment the panda die? Or I can still beat the shit out of the corpse until all the bones and flesh turned into a big ugly mess?
Do I get to eat the panda too, if I wanted?

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TheClarkster

No, no, not fuck... fight the panda. There's probably a big difference.

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Averett

But what if I fight the panda by fucking it with a wodden bat?



Okay, that's really, really wrong...

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skier

You guys are sick.

All i'm asking is if you would destroy one more member of an already endangered race for personal gain. Why do you have to pervert it into something gross like that?

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Averett

TheClarkster started it Dad! You should like, totally ground him.

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NoSoup

Na - Uh!

I saw Averett start it with my own eyes. I think maybe you shouldn't let TheClarkster hang around her any more, she is a terrible influence...

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