If you were god...
 

If I was god I would run past that camera robot on Mars with a gorilla suit on and freak everyone out.

You?

If I was god I'd scrounge around at the city dumps, harrassing the birds and rats.

If I was God, I would rearrange cities at night just to screw with peoples' minds.

if i was god,i would let mother nature take over the planet.

If I was God I'd make divine conception with every chick on the planet.

If I were a god I would make every chick on the planet Astrocloud.

If I were god -GH would be bite sized

even if i was god.............i'd wonder why????????:confused:

If I were god I'd make geese see me.

canadian geese?

If I were God, I would stop everyone from hating each other. I would get rid of diseases like cancer, ALS, and other nasty shit that takes you out in your prime. I would erase world hunger.

If I were God, I would make sure that every line you waited was the fastest line. I would make smoking smell nice and be consequence-free. I would make the ingredients for making beer so abundant that it would sell for only $1.00 a case.

If I were God, everyone would be able to have sex with anyone else they wanted, there would be no jealousy. Drug use would only affect you while you were using and would have no addictive effect-ever, and you would never overdose.

If I were God, everyone could afford a 1 million dollar house and drive around in Ferrari's. There would be a Ferrari SUV. Flyman would be President and his first Executive Order would be to turn the Capitol Dome into a gigantic hookah.

Before I start getting ludicrous, let me just say that a lot of things would certainly be different if I were God.

If I were god, I'd sneak into everyone's house while they were sleeping and switch the "M" and "N" keys on the keyboard... in fact, I am thinking about doing that anyways...

wrkime, man... next election i'm voting for you as GOD. you the man for the job.

if i was the goddess, yeah goddess, women rule, fuckin deal with it...
i'd make every lotto ticket purchase a jackpot winner.
i would destroy hate & greed. liars & thieves & other slime of the earth forms would be banished to a dungeon full of their own pooh.
there'd be 3-day work weeks & 5 day weekends (yeah, i'd add an additional day to the week).
the temperature would remain a pleasant constant 74 degrees year round, except for people who like skiing, so the alps & tahoe would remain snowy year round.
all the domesticated homeless animals would have good homes where they're spoiled rotten & no one would complain about it.
they'd be no wars, cuz there's no greed or prejudice anymore.
crackprogram's keyboard would be nothing but the keys "M" & "N" :p

If I were god, I'd make wrkime and bernie god(ess) cuz their world sounds so much better than harrassing birds and rats.




/needs new job

You and me all the way bernadette. We'd be known as the Gods to be with, maybe Nike might even give us our own sneaker to commemorate our Godnesses.

If I were God...I would make sense of myself to people.

If I were God I would hide from the geese... in an arcade playing skee-ball.

If I was God, the sea would be Guinness.
And there would be no devil, only me when I was drunk.

If I were god there would be elicit sex on Tv...... like little opie eatting pie that he made with aunt bee....

wrkime..........you got my vote for god man.......


*hookah*

Hot damn, you'd get my vote!

If I were god I'd get paddyjoe's vote

I'd get rid of every powered weapon on the planet.

No guns, no bombs, no missles, no gernades, no mines. Nothing that didn't work by hand power

Then, if you wanted to keep killing each other it would be personal. You would have to look someone in the eye and take your chances if you wanted to kill them.

Might cut down the violence a little.

Oh yeah! Motorcycles would always have the right of way.

Popeye the sailor would be on the $100 bill.

And breasts would never respond to the long time affect of gravity.

I'd randomly smite people. Coz That's the kind of prick that I am.

If I were God I would walk the world naked sipping ice tea...

If I were god. I would stop time and head to the local malls to um, well you get the idea.

Hell. I do that anyway.

I would be a very very flawed administrator...

What do mean IF I were God? ;)

You just reminded me of this Red Meat comic:
http://www.redmeat.com/redmeat/1999-08-30/index.html

nice!

Re: If you were god...
 

I don't think anyone would actually notice:

http://www.sciam.com/article.cfm?cha...0D83414B7F0000

In Antarctica?

If I were god I'd post to this thread to prove to you I was.

Actually, come to think of it, if I was God, I would probably just wander into people's houses and eat their food, watch their tv, snd if anyone said anything to me, I'd be all like "Fuck You! I *am* God you know"

Two words... Clothing optional Tuesdays!

I guess if you were god, you would have accountants to count for you? :D

...

sometimes even god get's screwed up by the damn metric conversions... :lol:

If I were God I'd make all the white people black and all the black people asian and all the asian people hispanic and all the hispanic people 15 feet tall.

All murderers would be turned into kittens.

Theives would be turned into hemroids on the murderer kittens' asses.

Grilled T-bone steaks would become cheap and available everywhere.

Hamsters would be given sedatives.

My son might actually behave for once.

If I were God I'd change nothing :D Because the world is just what you make of it ;)