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#3 (permalink) |
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Location: Tokyo
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upon being pulled over for driving down the footpath of a main road, silly drunk billy´s first words to the young policewoman were,
¨i haven´t had a cunt all night, drinkstable.¨ classic line, but i´ve never met anyone with balls to try it on. **apologies for the c word**
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Ohayo!!! |
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#7 (permalink) |
Psycho
Location: MA
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one's i've heard:
"Hey! If I lick this will I die?" (person is holding a wire that is coming out of the wall) and "I just want to fart in this girl's face" drunk high school kids always come up with weird sayings
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You had me at Qapla' |
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#8 (permalink) |
green
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me drunk after a concert in new york a couple years back...
*is leaning against a building* cop: get off there, no loitering me: (sounding like Jim Breuer in Half Baked) You know what? How about I go loiter.......... over here. *tries to sit on newspaper dispenser, falls over*
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Your arms are broken! |
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#12 (permalink) |
cookie
Location: in the backwoods
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My friend, drunk as we go through the Wendy's drive-thru with a cute sounding (probably in High School) girl on the other end.
Me- "I'll have a number one with cheese, mustard, and no Mayo or ketchup. Hey, ___, do you want anything?" Friend, trying to be funny and way too loud -"can I get a vagina combo?" cute-sounding girl on the microphone - "uhm, do you want a big water for him?" It's never a good idea to talk to the cops who are trying to break up a frat party because of noise complaints: The cops came and told everyone to leave and go home. Having had "just a few drinks" and irritated that they had come so soon, I went to talk to them. As the conversation deteriorated, but just before my friends came to take me away before I got in trouble, one of the cops threatened to arrest everyone there for public intoxication unless I quit arguing with him. "Well, how much sense does that make? We were trying to be lawful, home-drunks, not public drunks, and no one would have been in public until you came and told them to go home, making them public-drunks." He wasn't amused, and I still think I had a point, but nothing came of it except that everyone gave me a hard time about being a lawful-home-drunk for the rest of my college career. Last edited by dy156; 12-16-2003 at 01:48 PM.. |
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#13 (permalink) |
Newlywed
Location: at home
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One time I was at a party, drunk, and decided to call my cousin. Yeah. I usually decide to call her when I'm drunk, and it's ALWAYS an original thought. lol
Anyways, I was singing the 'drunk' song.... "I'm drunk I'm drunk I'm drunk.. I'm really really drunk... I'm drunk I'm drunk I'm drunk... I'm really really drunk.." to the tune of that one song... I can't remember the name of it right now.. it's like a hatdance song or something..... (yes, I'm sober, I'm just tired....) ![]()
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![]() Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly-Rose Franken ....absence makes me miss him more... |
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#14 (permalink) | |
Ssssssssss
Location: Ontario
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Quote:
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#16 (permalink) |
Addict
Location: Harlem
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Cop pulls a guy over for reckless driving and says "What are you doing driving on the sidewalk"
the guy replies "Can't you see Im too drunk to drive in the streets." Supposedly a true story from somewhere but I doubt it.
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I know Nietzsche doesnt rhyme with peachy, but you sound like a pretentious prick when you correct me. |
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Tags |
drunk, favorite, sayings |
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