anleja

Reverend Horton Heat does both of these:
"Five-O Ford"
Let me tell you the tale of a hot rod race,
That happened out in a secluded place
Where no one lives
'cept cows and a few raccoons
I was drivin' around in my shoebox car,
My baby and me underneath the stars,
My engine was knockin
But i knew it'd clear real soon.
I was cruisin' along 'bout 95,
I looked in my mirror and man alive
Some guy was gaining on me
As his engine roared.
So i gave that holly carb some gas,
My baby cried out don't let him pass,
I guess it's just that bitch got bored,
I had to race my fucked up Ford.
I made the turn at 108,
And he was up on my back gate,
And I knew he had something bad,
Underneath that hood.
So I pushed it up to 110,
That flathead motor was about to give in,
I crossed my fingers and prayed to the Lord,
Don't let me down you fucked up Ford.
It's my fucked up Ford!
It's my fucked up Ford!
When cherry tops began to spin,
I knew this race was about to end,
It's a cop by god
My engine can't give no more.
He threw me in jail, warrant ignored
My car blew up as the oil poured,
I guess it's just that bitch got bored,
I had to race my fucked up Ford.

"Big Red Rocket Of Love"
I got a red car with blue tail lights
Shiny red seats with lining in white
Leopard skin dash with a louvered hood
She goes ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba when she's runnin' good
(chorus)
Lets go ride into the mountains above
It's low
My big red rocket of love
My big red rocket of love
I got a little honey you just got to know
Drivin' this bomb as fast it will go
Drive the red rocket past the local dive
She goes ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba in overdrive
(chorus)
Horny Little baby in my back seat
Pull my velveteen curtain with pleats
Pick a little spot were no one will be
Ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-make love to me
(chorus)

Both these songs make me want to drive fast.

uncle phil

ADDICTED TO LOVE
Robert Palmer


Your lights are on, but you're not home
Your mind is not your own
Your heart sweats, your body shakes
Another kiss is what it takes

You can't sleep, you can't eat
There's no doubt, you're in deep
Your throat is tight, you can't breathe
Another kiss is all you need

Whoa, you like to think that you're immune to the stuff, oh yeah
It's closer to the truth to say you can't get enough
You know you're gonna have to face it, you're addicted to love

You see the signs, but you can't read
You're runnin' at a different speed
Your heart beats in double time
Another kiss and you'll be mine, a one track mind

You can't be saved
Oblivion is all you crave
If there's some left for you
You don't mind if you do

Whoa, you like to think that you're immune to the stuff, oh yeah
It's closer to the truth to say you can't get enough
You know you're gonna have to face it, you're addicted to love

Might as well face it, you're addicted to love
Might as well face it, you're addicted to love
Might as well face it, you're addicted to love
Might as well face it, you're addicted to love
Might as well face it, you're addicted to love

[Guitar Break]

Your lights are on, but you're not home
Your will is not your own
You're heart sweats and teeth grind
Another kiss and you'll be mine

Whoa, you like to think that you're immune to the stuff, oh yeah
It's closer to the truth to say you can't get enough
You know you're gonna have to face it, you're addicted to love

Might as well face it, you're addicted to love
Might as well face it, you're addicted to love
Might as well face it, you're addicted to love
Might as well face it, you're addicted to love
Might as well face it, you're addicted to love

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

grumpyolddude

well done, phil.

__________________
"Regret can be a harder pill to swallow than failure .With failure you at least know you gave it a chance..." David Howard

uncle phil

hey, it ain't just about cars and stuff, ya know?

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

DEAD SKUNK
Loudon Wainwright III


Crossin' the highway late last night
He shoulda looked left and he shoulda looked right
He didn't see the station wagon car
The skunk got squashed and there you are!

You got yer
Dead skunk in the middle of the road
Dead skunk in the middle of the road
You got yer dead skunk in the middle of the road
Stinkin' to high Heaven!

Take a whiff on me, that ain't no rose!
Roll up yer window and hold yer nose
You don't have to look and you don't have to see
'Cause you can feel it in your olfactory

You got yer
Dead skunk in the middle of the road
Dead skunk in the middle of the road
You got yer dead skunk in the middle of the road
Stinkin' to high Heaven!

Yeah you got yer dead cat and you got yer dead dog
On a moonlight night you got yer dead toad frog
Got yer dead rabbit and yer dead raccoon
The blood and the guts they're gonna make you swoon!
You got yer
Dead skunk in the middle of the road
Dead skunk in the middle of the road
You got yer dead skunk in the middle of the road
Stinkin' to high Heaven!

C'mon stink!

You got it!
It's dead, it's in the middle
Dead skunk in the middle!
Dead skunk in the middle of the road
Stinkin' to high heaven!
All over the road, technicolor man!
Oh, you got pollution
It's dead, it's in the middle
And it's stinkin' to high, high Heaven!

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

richeee

Only the best for Bones:

Todd Rundgren- "Emperor Of The Highway"

I am the Emperor of the Highway
I wield the Universal Will
One might chance to overlook on my Divineness
Unless I'm sitting in the Imperial Poupe de Ville
I am the Emperor of the Highway
Strapped with foolish mortals such as these
I need never indicate my intentions
I can stop and go and turn just as I please
For I am the Emperor of the Highway

Hold!
Methinks that thou hast driven too far
I am the Royal Prince of Foreign Sports Cars
Better that I should drive a wheelchair or jog
Than to be blown off by a Regal Road Hog

I am the Emperor of the Highway
(Where did you ever get that gas sucking pig of a car?)
This time my friend, you are outclassed
(Any real man would drive a stick shift)
For my uncle is the Duke of the State Police
(Cut me off again and I will punch your lights out)
And he will place his Royal Boot upon your Ass
(This is my exit, we shall meet another day)

Don't forget who's Emperor of the Highway
For I am the Emperor of the Highway!

__________________
Pas le cri, le coeur de Minx! .... Where can I stare now?.........I did!!!What about You?

uncle phil

DETROIT CITY
Bobby Bare


I want to go home, I want to go home,
Oh Lord, I want to go home.

Last night I went to sleep in Detroit city,
And I dreamed about those cotton fields and home,
I dreamed about my mother, dear old papa, sister and brother,
And I dreamed about that girl, who's been waitin' for so long

I want to go home, I want to go home,
Oh Lord, I want to go home

Home folks think I'm big in Detroit city,
From the letters that I write they think I'm fine,
But by day I make the cars, and by night I make the bars,
If only they could read between the lines

I want to go home, I want to go home,
Oh Lord, I want to go home

SPOKEN: You know, I rode a freight train north to Detroit city,
And after all these years I find I've just been wasting my time,
So I think I'll take my foolish pride, put it on a southbound freight
and ride,
Go on back to the ones I left, who've been waitin' for so long

I want to go home, I want to go home,
Oh Lord, I want to go home.

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

Don't Ask Me No Questions
Lynard Skynard


Well everytime that I come home nobody wants to let me be
It seems that all the friends I got just got to come interrogate me
Well, I appreciate your feelings and I don't want to pass you by
But I don't ask you about your business, don't ask me about mine

Well its true I love the money and I love my brand new car
I like drinkin' the best of whiskey and playing in a honky tonk bar
But when I come off the road, well I just got to have my time
'Cause I got to find a break in this action, else I'm gonna lose my mind

(Chorus)
So, don't ask me no questions
And I won't tell you no lies
So, don't ask me about my business
And I won't tell you goodbye

That's right

Well, "what's your favorite color and do you dig the brothers," is drivin' me up a wall
And everytime I think I can sleep, some fool has got to call
Well don't you think that when I come home, I just want a little peace of mind
If you want to talk about the business buddy, you're just wastin' time

(Chorus)

I said don't ask no stupid questions and I won't send you away
If you want to talk fishin, well I guess that'll be OK

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

THE LITTLE OLD LADY (FROM PASADENA)
Jan and Dean

It's the little old lady from Pasadena

The little old lady from Pasadena
(Go, Granny, go, Granny, go Granny go)
Has a pretty little flower bed of white gardenias
(Go, Granny, go, Granny, go Granny go)
But parked in a rickety old garage
Is a brand new, shiny red Super Stock Dodge

CHORUS:
And everybody's sayin' that there's nobody meaner
Than the little old lady from Pasadena
(She drives real fast and she drives real hard)
She's the terror of Colorado Boulevard

It's the little old lady from Pasadena
If you see her on the street don't try to choose her
(Go, Granny, go, Granny, go Granny go)
You might drive a goer but you'll never lose her
(Go, Granny, go, Granny, go Granny go)
Well, she's gonna get a ticket now sooner or later
'Cause she can't keep her foot off the accelerator

CHORUS

MUSICAL INTERLUDE

(Go, Granny, go, Granny, go Granny go)
(Go, Granny, go, Granny, go Granny go)
The guys come to race her for miles around
But she'll give 'em a length and then she'll shut 'em down

CHORUS

Go, Granny, go, Granny, go Granny go *REPEAT 6 TIMES

FADE

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

Midnight_Son

Bones strikes me as being a big fan of WHAM!
so.....here ya go.

You put the boom - boom into my heart
You send my soul sky high when your lovin' starts
Jitterbug into my brain
Goes a bang - bang - bang 'til my feet do the same
But something's bugging you
Something ain't right
My best friend told me what you did last night
Left me sleepin' in my bed
I was dreaming, but I should have been with you instead.

Wake me up before you go - go
Don't leave me hanging on like a yo - yo
Wake me up before you go - go
I don't want to miss it when you hit that high
Wake me up before you go - go
'Cause I'm not plannin' on going solo
Wake me up before you go - go
Take me dancing tonight
I wanna hit that high (yeah, yeah)

You take the grey skies out of my way
You make the sun shine brighter than Doris Day
Turned a bright spark into a flame
My beats per minute never been the same

'Cause you're my lady, I'm your fool
It makes me crazy when you act so cruel
Come on, baby, let's not fight
We'll go dancing, everything will be all right

Wake me up before you go - go
Don't leave me hanging on like a yo - yo
Wake me up before you go - go
I don't want to miss it when you hit that high
Wake me up before you go - go
'Cause I'm not plannin'' on going solo
Wake me up before you go - go
Take me dancing tonight
I wanna hit that high (yeah, yeah, baby)

(Jitterbug)
(Jitterbug)

Cuddle up, baby, move in tight
We'll go dancing tomorrow night
It's cold out there, but it's warm in bed
They can dance, we'll stay home instead

(Jitterbug)

Wake me up before you go - go
Don't leave me hanging on like a yo - yo
Wake me up before you go - go
I don't want to miss it when you hit that high
Wake me up before you go - go
'Cause I'm not plannin' on going solo
Wake me up before you go - go
Take me dancing tonight
Wake me up before you go - go, don't you dare to leave me hanging on like a
Yo - yo
Take me dancing

__________________
SWM, tattooed, seeks meaningful tits and beer. Enjoys biker mags, pornography, and Sunday morning walks to the liquor store. Winners of erotic hot dog eating contests given priority.

cchris

Bumps

then

Grinds

What a great thread.


TISM again


Greg! The Stop Sign!!

The guy who slagged the football team -
Those yobs were not for him -
Turns into a real estate agent
Who believes in discipline;
That guy who's the first to use cocaine,
The wild boy breaking free,
Ends up in a court of law
As a prosecuting Q.C.;
Remember the school captain? -
Success was a matter of time:
I can hear her now as she screams,
"Greg! You missed the stop sign!"

Forget Snoop Doggy Dog,
Forget ol' Ice T -
The true word out on the streets
Is produced by the T.A.C.
What good's the use of striving?
As Life's road in front unravels
We get to do the driving,
But don't choose the direction we travel.
Do your homework, or wag for weeks
And graffiti the Dandenong line:
It don't matter when you hear that scream -
"Greg! You missed the stop sign!"

Some time in the next hundred thousand years
A comet's gonna wipe out all trace of Man -
I'm banking on it coming before
My end of year exam.
The rich kid, he becomes a junkie,
The poor kid, an advertiser :
What a tragic waste of potential -
Being a junkie's not so good, either.
Your folks struggled hard for what you've got,
You are the fruit of their vine;
But who cares what you sow when what you reap
Is: "Greg! You missed the stop sign!"

Hardwired into everyone's head
Is the person they're gonna be -
Growing up is not a matter of choice,
It's a matter of wait and see.
And so kids, yeah! you can do it!
Remember to be your best!
Rage without fucking alcohol!
You can pass the test!
Girls can do anything!
I'm O.K! You're O.K! We're fine!
I thought I saw a semi-trailer!


Greg! You missed the stop sign!

__________________
There's a fine line between participation and mockery

uncle phil

UNKNOWN LEGEND
Neil Young


She used to work in a diner
Never saw a woman look finer
I used to order just to watch her float across the floor
She grew up in a small town
Never put her roots down
Daddy always kept movin', so she did too.

Somewhere on a desert highway
She rides a Harley-Davidson
Her long blonde hair flyin' in the wind
She's been runnin' half her life
The chrome and steel she rides
Collidin' with the very air she breathes
The air she breathes.

You know it ain't easy
You got to hold on
She was an unknown legend in her time
Now she's dressin' two kids
Lookin' for a magic kiss
She gets the far-away look in her eyes.

Somewhere on a desert highway
She rides a Harley-Davidson
Her long blonde hair flyin' in the wind
She's been runnin' half her life
The chrome and steel she rides
Collidin' with the very air she breathes
The air she breathes.

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

DRAG CITY
Jan & Dean

Burn up that quarter mile
Just tuned my car, now she really peels
A-lookin' real tough with chrome reverse wheels
A Blue Coral wax job sure looks pretty
Gonna get my chick and make it out to Drag City

Chorus:
[1: Yeah 2: Well] I'm goin' to Drag City (run her through, now)
Goin' to Drag City (what'll she do now)
Goin' to Drag City (run her through, now)
Goin' to Drag City (what'll she do now)
Burn up that quarter mile

The DJ's sayin' on my favorite station
The Drag City races are the fastest in the nation
Wheels are the wildest and the stockers are pretty
I'll get my honey, grab some money, split to Drag City

[repeat chorus]

'Round the dragway thick exhaust fills the air
The final teams tachin' up and action everywhere
Checkered flags, wheelstands, sure sounds pretty
To hear the cheers, bring your ears out to Drag City

Chorus
Well, I'm goin' to Drag City (run her through, now)
Goin' to Drag City (what'll she do now)
Goin' to Drag City (run her through, now)
Goin' to Drag City (what'll she do now)
Burn up that quarter mile
Burn up that quarter mile
Listen to 'em whine (whine, whine, whine)

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

Blue Fish

RUSH

Red Barchetta

My uncle has a country place
That no one knows about.
He says it used to be a farm
Before the Motor Law.
And on Sundays I elude the Eyes,
And hop the Turbine Freight
To far outside the Wire
Where my white-haired uncle waits.

Jump to the ground
As the Turbo slows to cross the borderline.
Run like the wind
As excitement shivers up and down my spine.
Down in his barn
My uncle preserved for me an old machine
For fifty-odd years.
To keep it as new has been his dearest dream.

I strip away the old debris
That hides a shining car:
A brilliant red Barchetta
From a better vanished time.
I fire up the willing engine
Responding with a roar.
Tires spitting gravel,
I commit my weekly crime.

Wind
In my hair
Shifting and drifting
Mechanical music
Adrenaline surge...

Well-weathered leather,
Hot metal and oil,
The scented country air.
Sunlight on chrome,
The blur of the landscape,
Every nerve aware.

Suddenly ahead of me
Across the mountainside
A gleaming alloy air-car
Shoots towards me, two lanes wide.
I spin around with shrieking tires
To run the deadly race
Go screaming through the valley
As another joins the chase.

Drive like the wind
Straining the limits of machine and man.
Laughing out loud with fear and hope
I've got a desperate plan.
At the one-lane bridge
I leave the giants stranded at the riverside.
Race back to the farm
To dream with my uncle at the fireside.

Blue Fish

Quiet Riot

Slick Black Cadillac


Ooooo, Just a big black set of wheels
Is what it takes to get me off
I'm gonna drive all night
Spin my wheels all night
It feels all right
It feels all right

I don't need no drivers license
I'm too reckless to survive
It's like a carburetor instigator
Feels all right
Feels all right

Drivin' in a Slick Black Cadillac
It's got solid gold hubcaps
It makes me feel like a king
I only need one thing
And that's a Slick Black Cadillac (get up)

You know I got a fully equipped rock 'n' roll machine
At speeds that take me high, high, high
At dead man's curve
I only hear one word drive, drive, drive
Drive, drive, drive

My machine is making headlines
It gives me love and everything
It's like an institution of revolution
It feels all right
Feels all right

Drivin' in a Slick Black Cadillac
It's got solid gold hubcaps
It makes me feel like a king
I only need one thing
And that's a Slick Black Cadillac (pull over, woooo)

I got the coppers on my tail
Just for me an A.P.B.
The sirens spinnin'
Though it's me who's winnin'
There're after me
There're after me

Before they know just what happened
I disappeared to their surprise
I got a Cadillac monkey on my back
And I don't mind
No, I don't mind

Drivin' in a Slick Black Cadillac
It's got solid gold hubcaps
It makes me feel like a king
I only need one thing
And that's a Slick Black Cadillac (hold on)

Slick Black Cadillac
It's got solid gold hubcaps

Slick Black Cadillac

I lay it down, spin wide and get laid in back, oh yeah

Drivin' in a Slick Black Cadillac
It makes me feel like a king, alright!

uncle phil

DRIVE MY CAR
The Beatles

Asked a girl what she wanted to be
She said "baby can't you see
I wanna be famous, a star of the screen
But you do something in between"

"Baby, you can drive my car
yes, I'm gonna be a star
Baby you can drive my car
And maybe I'll love you"

I told that girl that my prospects were good
And she said "baby it's understood
Working for peanuts is all very fine
But I can show you a better time"

"Baby, you can drive my car
yes, I'm gonna be a star
Baby you can drive my car
And maybe I'll love you"
Beep beep mm beep beep, yeah

"Baby, you can drive my car
yes, I'm gonna be a star
Baby you can drive my car
And maybe I'll love you"

I told that girl I could start right away
And she said "listen baby I've got something to say
I got no car and it's breaking my heart
But I've found a driver and that's a start"

"Baby, you can drive my car
yes, I'm gonna be a star
Baby you can drive my car
And maybe I'll love you"
Beep beep mm beep beep, yeah
Beep beep mm beep beep, yeah
Beep beep mm beep beep, yeah

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When The Stripper Is Crying
Bloodhound Gang


I was lonelier than Michael Jackson at an Eminem concert.
That night I strolled on into Uncle Limpy’s Hump Palace lookin for love.
It had been a while.
In fact, three hundred and sixty-five had come and went
Since that midnight run haulin hog to Shakey Town on I-10.
I had picked up this hitchhiker that was sweatin gallons
Through a pair of Daisy Duke cut-offs and one of those Fruit Of The Loom tank-tops.
Well, that night I lost myself to ruby red lips,
Milky white skin and baby blue eyes.
Name was Russell.

Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it’s quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'

Well, faster than you can say, “shallow grave"
this pretty little thing come up to me and starts kneadin' my balls
like hard-boiled eggs in a tube sock.
Said her name was Bambi and I said, “Well that’s a coincidence darlin?
‘cause I was just thinkin' about skinnin' you like a deer. "
Well she smiled, had about as much teeth as a Jack-O-Lantern,
and I went on to tell her how I would wear her face like a mask
as I do my little kooky dance.
And then she told me to shush.
I guess she could sense my desperation.
‘Course, it’s hard to hide a hard-on when you’re dressed like Minnie Pearl.

Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it’s quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'

So, Bambi’s goin' on about how she can make all my fantasies come true.
So I says, “Even this one I have where Jesus Christ
is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole
with a lawn dart as Garth Brooks gives birth to something
resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus’s tummy-tum?"
Well, ten beers, twenty minutes and thirty dollars later
I’m parkin' the beef bus in tuna town if you know what I mean.
Got to nail her back at her trailer.
Heh. That rhymes.
I have to admit it was even more of a turn-on
when I found out she was doin' me to buy baby formula.

Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it’s quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'

Day or so had passed when I popped the clutch,
gave the tranny a spin and slid on into
The Stinky Pinky Gulp N' Guzzle Big Rig Snooze-A-Stop.
There I was browsin?through the latest issue of “Throb"
when I saw Bambi starin' at me from the back of a milk carton.
Well, my heart just dropped.
So, I decided to do what any good Christian would.
You can not imagine how difficult it is to hold a half gallon of moo juice
and polish the one-eyed gopher when your doin' seventy-five
in an eighteen-wheeler.
I never thought missing children could be so sexy.
Did I say that out loud'

Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it’s quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

Be True To Your School
The Beach Boys


When some loud braggart tries to put me down
And says his school is great
I tell him right away
"Now what's the matter buddy
Ain't you heard of my school
It's number one in the state"
(Hey hey take it away, let's call it fight)

So be true to your school
(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah)
Just like you would to your girl or guy
(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah)
Be true to your school now
(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah)
Let your colors fly
(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah)
Be true to your school
(Rah rah rah rah rah)

I got a letterman's sweater
With a letter in front
I got for football and track
I'm proud to where it now
When I cruise around
The other parts of the town
I got my decal in back

So be true to your school
(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah)
Just like you would to your girl or guy
(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah)
Be true to your school now
(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah)
Let your colors fly
(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah)
Be true to your school
(Do it again, do it again, we like it, we like it)

(Rah rah rah rah rah)
Come friday we'll be jacked up on the football game
And I'll be ready to fight
We're gonna smash 'em now
My girl will be working on her pom-poms now
And she'll be yelling tonight

So be true to your school
(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah)
Just like you would to your girl or guy
(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah)
Be true to your school now
(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah)
Let your colors fly
(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah)
Be true to your school
(Push 'em back, push 'em back, way back)

(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah) (let your colors...)
(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah) (let your...)
(Rah rah rah rah sis boom bah) (let...)

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

Asshole
Denis Leary


(Spoken)
Folks, I'd like to sing a song about the American dream.
About me, about you, about the way our American hearts beat way down
in the bottom of our chests. About that special feeling we get in the
cockles of our hearts, maybe below the cockles, maybe in the subcockle
area. Maybe in the liver. Maybe in the kidneys. Maybe even in the
colon, we don't know.

(Sung)
I'm just a regular Joe with a regular job.
I'm your average white suburbanite slob.
I like football and porno and books about war.
I got an average house with a nice hardwood floor.

My wife and my job, my kids and my car.
My feet on my table...and a cuban cigar.

But sometimes that just ain't enough to keep a man like me interested
no way
No, I've gotta go out and have fun at someone else's expense
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

I drive really slow in the ultra-fast lane,
While people behind me are going insane.

I'm an asshole
I'm an asshole

I use public toilets and I piss on the seat,
I walk around in the summertime saying "How about this heat?"

I'm an asshole
I'm an asshole

Sometimes I park in handicapped spaces,
While handicapped people make handicapped faces.

I'm an asshole
I'm an asshole

Maybe I shouldn't be singing this song
Ranting and raving and carrying on
Maybe they're right when they tell me I'm wrong...

NAAAAH!

I'm an asshole
I'm an asshole

(Spoken)
Know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna get myself a 1967 Cadillac El Dorado
Convertible, hot pink, with whaleskin hubcaps and all-leather cow
interior and big brown baby seal eyes for headlights... yeah! And I'm
gonna drive around in that baby at 115 miles per hour, getting 1 mile
per gallon, suckin' down quarter pound cheeseburgers from McDonald's
in the old-fashioned non-biodegradable styrofoam containers and when
I'm done suckin' down those greaseball burgers I'm gonna wipe my mouth
on the American Flag and then I'm gonna toss the styrofoam containers
right out the side, and there ain't a goddamn thing anybody can
do about it. You know why? Because we got the bombs, that's why Two
words: Nuclear fuckin' weapons, OK? Russia, Germany, Romania, they
can have all the democracy they want...they can have a big democracy
cakewalk right through the middle of Tienamen Square and it won't make
a lick of difference, because we got the bombs, OK? John Wayne's not
dead, he's frozen! And as soon as we find a cure for cancer, we're
gonna thaw out the Duke and he's gonna be pretty pissed off. You know
why? Have you ever taken a cold shower? Well, multiply that by 15
million times, that's how pissed off the Duke's gonna be.
I'm gonna get the Duke and John Casavetti and Lee Marvin

and Sam Peckinpaw

and a case of whisky

and drive to Texas...(HEY, HEY HEY!)



Why don't you shut up and sing the song, pal?

(Sung)
I'm an asshole
I'm an asshole
A-S-S H-O-L-E
Everybody, A-S-S H-O-L-E
Arf, Arf Arf, Arf Arf, Arf Arf
Thoomph A-thoom-thoom A-thoom-thoom A-thoom-thoom
Oooooooo

(Spoken)
I'm an asshole and I'm proud of it

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

Beach Baby
First Class


Do you remember back in old LA (Oh, oh, oh)
When everybody drove a Chevrolet (Oh, oh, oh)
Whatever happened to the boy next door
Sun-tanned crew cut All American Male?

What ever happened at the high school hop?
I guess you should remember soda pop.
Ever think about the girl next door
With beat up sneakers and a pony tail?

Beach Baby Beach Baby Give me your hand
give me something that I can remember
Just like before we can walk by the shore in the moonlight

Beach Baby Beach Baby There on the sand
from July til the end of September
Surfin was fun we'd be out in the sun every day

Ooooh, never thought that it could end
Ooooh, and I was everybody's friend,
Oh, Oh,

We couldn't wait til graduation day
We took the car and drove to San Jose
That's where you told me that you'd wear my ring
I guess you don't remember anything.

Beach Baby Beach Baby Give me your hand
give me something that I can remember
Just like before we can walk by the shore in the moonlight

Beach Baby Beach Baby There on the sand
from July til the end of September
Surfin was fun we'd be out in the sun every day

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

Cars Hiss By My Window
The Doors


The cars hiss by my window
Like the waves down on the beach
The cars hiss by my window
Like the waves down on the beach
I got this girl beside me
But she’s out of reach

Headlight through my window
Shinin' on the wall
Headlight through my window
Shinin' on the wall
Can’t hear my baby
Though I called and called

Yeah, right
Woo!

Windows started tremblin' With a sonic boom
Windows started tremblin' With a sonic boom, boom
A cold girl’ll kill you
In a darkened room

Yeah, woo
Ride
Ride on
Weooooo!
Wawa, eooo!
Oooo, owa, owaaa!
Wa, waaaaea!
Ooo, wa, wa, wa, wa, waa!
Uh-huh

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

CLAP FOR THE WOLFMAN
The Guess Who


Clap for the Wolfman
He gonna rate your record high
Clap for the Wolfman
You gonna dig him til the day you die

Do Ron Ron and the Duke of Earl
They were friend's of mine
The highway's on my moonlight drive
Snuggled in, said "baby, just one kiss"
She said "no, no, no"
Romance ain't keepin' me alive
I said "hey babe, do you want to coo, coo, coo"
She said "uh, uh, uh"
So I was left out in the cold
I said "you're what I've been dreamin' of"
She said "I don't want to know"
(Wolfman Jack: "Oh you know, she was diggin' the cat on the radio")

Clap for the Wolfman
He gonna rate your record high
(WJ: "Yes baby, I your doctor in love")
Clap for the Wolfman
You gonna dig him til the day you die
(WJ: "Everybody talkin' about the Wolfman's confidence of love")

Seventy five, eighty miles an hour
She hollers "slow, slow, slow"
"Baby I can stop right on a dime"
I said "hey baby, give me just one kiss"
She said "no, no, no"
But how was I to bide my time
I said "Hey baby, do you want to coo, coo, coo"
She said "uh, uh, uh"
Said I'm about to overload
I said "you're what I've been livin' for"
She said "I don't want to know"
(WJ: "Oh, you thought she was digging you but she was digging me")

Clap for the Wolfman
He gonna rate your record high (
WJ: "As long as you got the curves baby, I got the angles")
Clap for the Wolfman
You gonna dig him til the day you die
(WJ: "It's all accoridng to how your boogaloo situation stands, you understand")

Clap for the Wolfman
He gonna rate your record high
(WJ: "You ain't gonna get 'em, cuz I got 'em")
Clap for the Wolfman
You gonna dig him til the day you die
(WJ: "You might wanna try, but I'm gonna keep 'em")
Clap for the Wolfman
Clap for the Wolfman
(WJ: "And I got 'em all")
Clap for the Wolfman

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

izzzzy

H ow about tombstone every mile or the haynesville woods by Dick Curless? Or give me forty acres and i'll turn this rig around, dont know the artist on that one.

uncle phil

GIVE ME 40 ACRES (TO TURN THIS RIG AROUND)
The Willis Brothers

He was headin' into Boston in a big, long diesel truck
It was his first trip to Boston, he was having lots of luck
He was going the wrong direction down a one-way street in town
And this is what he said when the police chased him down.

CHORUS:
Give me forty acres and I'll turn this rig around
It's the easiest way that I've found ...
Some guys can turn it on a dime or turn it right downtown
But I need forty acres to turn this rig around.

When he finally found where to unload, he had a dreadful shock
His trailer pointed toward the road and his cab right to the dock
And as he looked around him through the tears he made this sound
Oh, give me forty acres and I'll turn this rig around.

CHORUS

When he finally got unloaded, he was glad to leave the town
He was very, very happy, headin' back to Alabam'
When up ahead he saw a sign, said; "You are Northward bound."
He said; "Give me forty acres and I'll turn this rig around."

He was driving down the right lane, when ahead he saw a sign
Now he's gotta make a left turn, but he cannot get in line
And the tears were streaming down his cheeks and they all heard him yell
"Give me forty sticks of dynamite and I'll blow this thing to ... !"
CHORUS

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

TOMBSTONE EVERY MILE
Dick Curliss

All you big and burly men who roll the trucks along
Better listen you'll be thankful when you hear my song
You have really got it made if you're haulin' goods
There's anyplace on earth but those Hangsville Woods
It's a stretch of road up north in Maine that's never ever ever seen a smile
If they'd burried all the truckers that's lost in them woods
There'd be a tombstone every mile

When you're loaded with potatoes and you're headed down
You've got to drive the woods to get to Boston town
When it's winter up in Maine you'd bettter check it over twice
Cause that Hangsville road is just a ribbon of ice
It's a stretch of road...
[ guitar ]
When you're talkin' to a trucker that's been haulin' goods
Down that stretch of road in Maine they call the Hangsville Woods
He'll tell you that dyin' and goin' down below
Won't be half as bad as drivin' on that ice and snow
It's a stretch of road...
There'd be a tombstone every mile

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

Convoy
C. W. McCall


Pigpen? C'mon.

AH, yeah, ten-four, Pigpen, for sure, for sure. By golly, it's clean clear to Flagtown. C'mon.

YEAH, that's a big ten-four there, Pigpen. Yeah, we definitely got the front door, good buddy. Mercy's sakes alive, looks like we got us a convoy

It was the dark of the moon on the sixth of June
And a Kenworth pullin' logs
Cab-over Pete with a reefer on
And a Jimmy haulin' hogs
We's headin' for bear on Eye-one-oh
'bout a mile outta Shakeytown
I says "Pigpen, this here's Rubber Duck"
"And I'm about to put the hammer down"

('cause we got a little ole convoy rockin' thru the night)
(Yeah, we got a little ole convoy, ain't she a beautiful sight?)
(Come on and join our convoy, ain't nothin' gonna get in our way)
(We gonna roll this truckin' convoy 'cross the USA)
(Convoy)

AH, breaker, Pigpen, this here's Duck 'n' you wanna back off them hogs?

AH, ten-four

ABOUT 5 mile or so

TEN roger

THEM hogs is gettin' INtense up here.

By the time we got into Tulsa-town we had 85 trucks in all
But they's a roadblock up on the cloverleaf
And them bears 's wall-to-wall
Yeah, them smokeys 's thick as bugs on a bumper
They even had a bear in the air
I says "Callin' all trucks, this here's the Duck"
"We about to go a-huntin' bear"

('cause we got a great big convoy rockin' thru the night)
(Yeah, we got a great big convoy, ain't she a beautiful sight?)
(Come on and join our convoy, ain't nothin' gonna get in our way)
(We gonna roll this truckin' convoy 'cross the USA)
(Convoy)

AH, you wanna give me a ten-nine on that, Pigpen? Negatory, Pigpen, you're still too close. Yeah, them hogs is startin' to close up my sinuses. Mercy's sake, you better back off another ten

Well, we rolled up Interstate Forty-Four
Like a rocket-sled on rails
We tore up all of our swindle sheets
And left 'em settin' on the scales
By the time we hit that "Chi-town"
Them bears was a-gettin smart
They brought up some reinforcements
From the "Illinoise" National Guard

There's armored cars and tanks and jeeps
'n' rigs of ev'ry size
Yeah, them chicken coops was full of bears
And choppers filled the skies
Well, we shot the line, we went for broke
With a thousand screamin' trucks
And eleven long-haired friends of Jesus
In a chartreuse microbus


AH, Rubber Duck, this 's Sodbuster. C'mon here

YEAH, ten-four, Sodbuster. Listen, ya wanna put that microbus in behind that

SUICIDE-JOCKEY?

YEAH, he's haulin' dynamite and he needs all the help he can get

Well, we laid a strip for the Jersey Shore
Prepared to cross the line
I could see the bridge was lined with bears
But I didn't have a doggone dime
I says "Pigpen, this here's the Rubber Duck"
"We just ain't a-gonna pay no toll"
So we crashed the gate doin' ninety-eight
I says "let them truckers roll, ten-four"

('cause we got a mighty convoy rockin' thru the night)
(Yeah, we got a mighty convoy, ain't she a beautiful sight?)
(Come on and join our convoy, ain't nothin' gonna get in our way)
(We gonna roll this truckin' convoy 'cross the USA)
(Convoy)

AH, ten-four, Pigpen. What's your twenty? OMAHA? Well, they oughta know what to do with them hogs out there, for sure. Well, mercy's sakes, good buddy, we gonna back on outta here, so keep your thumbs off your glass and the bears off your……..tail. We'll catch you on the flip-flop. This here's the Rubber Duck on the side. We gone. 'bye, 'bye

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

Custom Machine
Beach Boys

Check my custom machine

Well she's metal flake blue with a corvette grill
(check my custom machine)
And they say it looks better when she's standin' still
(check my custom machine)
When i step on the gas she goes wa aa aa
I'll let you look but don't touch my custom machine

Well with naugahyde bucket seats in front and back
(check my custom machine)
Everything is chrome, man, even my jack
(check my custom machine)
When i step on the gas she goes wa aa aa
I'll let you look but don't touch my custom machine

With stereophonic speaker set with fibrosonic sound
(check my custom machine)
Magnesium spokes, it stands an inch off the ground
(check my custom machine)
When i step on the gas she goes wa aa aa
I'll let you look but don't touch my custom machine

Oo oo oo oo oo oo oo oo

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

in honor of bones' new car:


Mustang Sally
Los Lobos


Mustang Sally,
Guess you better slow your Mustang down.
Mustang Sally, my baby,
Guess you better slow your Mustang down.
You been a runnin' all over the town now,
Guess I'll have to put your flat feet on the ground.

All you wanna do is a ride around, Sally (RIDE SALLY RIDE)
All you wanna do is a ride around, Sally (RIDE SALLY RIDE)
All you wanna do is a ride around, Sally (RIDE SALLY RIDE)
All you wanna do is a ride around, Sally (RIDE SALLY RIDE)

One of these early mornings
I'm gonna be wipin' those weepin' eyes.

I bought you a brand new Mustang, it was a natural sixty-five.
Now you comin' right signifyin' a woman,
Girl you won't, won't let me ride.
Mustang Sally, now baby,
Guess you better slow that Mustang down.
You been a runnin' all over the town,
Oh, I gotta put your flat feet on the ground.

All you wanna do is a ride around, Sally (RIDE SALLY RIDE)
All you wanna do is a ride around, Sally (RIDE SALLY RIDE)
All you wanna do is a ride around, Sally (RIDE SALLY RIDE)
All you wanna do is a ride around, Sally (RIDE SALLY RIDE)

One of these early mornings, I'm gonna be wipin' your weepin' eyes.

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

Drive In
Beach Boys


Ooo wah
Ooo wah

Everytime i have a date there's only one place to go
That's to the drive in
It's such a groovy place to talk and maybe watch a show
Down at the drive in

Forget about the plot, it'll do very well
But make sure you see enough so you're prepared to tell
About the drive in
(ooo wah)
I love the drive in
(we love the drive in, we love the drive in)

If the windows get fogged you'll have to take a breath
(oooooooo waah oooo)
Down at the drive in
(wah wah ooooooo)
Or the cat dressed in white will scare you both to death
Down at the drive in

A big buttered popcorn and an extra large coke
A few chili dogs and man i'm goin' broke
Down at the drive in
(ooo wah)
Yeah at the drive in
(we love the drive in, we love the drive in)

Don't sneak your buddies in the trunk 'cause they might get caught
By the drive in
(wah wah wah ooooooo)
And they'd look kinda stupid gettin' chased through the lot
(wah ooooooo)
Around the drive in

If you say you watch the movie you're a couple o' liars
And "remember only you can prevent forest fires"
Down at the drive in
(ooo wah)
I love the drive in
(we love the drive in, we love the drive in)
Down at the drive in
(ooo wah)
I love the drive in
(we love the drive in, we love the drive in)
Down at the drive in
(ooo wah)
I love the drive in
(we love the drive in, we love the drive in)

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

DRIVING MY LIFE AWAY
Eddie Rabbit


Well the midnight headlight find you on a rainy night
steep grade up ahead slow me down makin no time
gotta keep rollin
those windshield wipers slappin out a tempo
keepin perfect rhythm with the song on the radio gotta keep rollin

CHORUS
ooh, I'm driving my life away, looking for a better way, for me
ooh, I'm driving my life away. looking for a sunny day

Well the truck stop cutie comin on to me
tried to talk me into a ride said I wouldn't be sorry
but she was just a baby
Well waitress pour me another cup of coffee
pop me down, jack me up, shoot me out
headin down the highway
lookin for the morning

Chorus

verse 1

chorus

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

FEEDBACK OUT ON HIGHWAY 101
Johnny Winter


Feedback
out on Highway 101.
Feedback
out on Highway 101.
Cruisin' easy,
and your favorite DJ
havin' fun.

Look out, stand back,
there's a fool out on the road.
Look out,
stand back,
there's a fool out on the road.
Had one too many drinks
and he just may overload.
Stand back.

Night time
cruisin' 'long,
cruisin' along.
Night time cruisin',
night time cruisin' along.
You don't see the setting sun
[even 'fore the mornin' come ??].

Feedback,
feedback
out on
Highway 101.
Feedback,
feedback, feedback,
feedback
out on Highway 101.
Cruisin' easy and your
favorite DJ is
havin' fun.

Feedback,
feedback,
feedback,
feedback,
feedback
out on Highway,
Highway 101.

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

FORD ECONOLINE
Nanci Griffith


She drove west from Salt Lake City to the California coastline
She hit the San Diego Freeway doing sixty miles an hour
She had a husband on her bumper
She had five restless children
She was singing sweet as a mockingbird in that Ford Econoline

(chorus )
She's the salt of the earth
Straight from the bosom of the Mormon church
With a voice like wine
Cruising along in that Ford Econoline
Now her husband was a gambler, he was a Salt Lake City rambler
He built a golden cage around his silver-throated wife
Too many nights he left her crying with his cheating and his lying
But his big mistake was him buying her that Ford Econoline
(repeat chorus twice)

Now she sings her songs around this country
From Seattle to Montgomery
Those kids are grown and that rounder knows
You cannot cage your wife
Along the back roads of our nation, she's become a living legend
She drives a Coupe DeVille but her heart rides still
In that Ford Econoline
She drives a Coup DeVille but her heart rides still
In that Ford Econoline

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

FUN, FUN, FUN
The Beach Boys


Well she got her daddy's car
And she cruised through the hamburger stand now
Seems she forgot all about the library
Like she told her old man now
And with the radio blasting
Goes cruising just as fast as she can now

And she'll have fun, fun, fun
'Til her daddy takes the T-Bird away
(Fun, fun, fun 'til her daddy takes the T-Bird away)

Well the girls can't stand her
'Cause she walks looks and drives like an ace now
(You walk like an ace now you walk like an ace)
She makes the Indy 500 look like a Roman chariot race now
(You look like an ace now you look like an ace)
A lot of guys try to catch her
But she leads them on a wild goose chase now
(You drive like an ace now you drive like an ace)

And she'll have fun, fun, fun
'Til her daddy takes the T-Bird away
(Fun, fun, fun 'til her daddy takes the T-Bird away)

Well you knew all along
That your dad was getting wise to you now
(You shouldn't have lied now you shouldn't have lied)
And since he took your set of keys
You've been thinking that your fun is all through now
(You shouldn't have lied now you shouldn't have lied)

But you can come along with me
'Cause we got a lot of things to do now
(You shouldn't have lied now you shouldn't have lied)

And we'll have fun, fun, fun now that daddy took the T-Bird away
(Fun, fun, fun now that daddy took the T-Bird away)
And we'll have fun, fun, fun now that daddy took the T-Bird away
(Fun, fun, fun now that daddy took the T-Bird away) (7x)

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

will this work?

She's A Rainbow
Rolling Stones


She comes in colors ev'rywhere,
she combs her hair
She's like a rainbow,
coming, colors in the air
Oh, everywhere, she comes in colors

She comes in colors ev'rywhere,
she combs her hair
She's like a rainbow,
coming, colors in the air
Oh, everywhere, she comes in colors

Have you seen her dressed in blue?
See the sky in front of you
And her face is like a sail,
speck of white so fair and pale
Have you seen a lady fairer?

Have you seen her all in gold?
Like a queen in days of old
She shoots her colors all around like
a sunset going down
Have you seen a lady fairer?
She comes in colors ev'rywhere,
she combs her hair
She's like a rainbow,
coming, colors in the air
Oh, everywhere, she comes in colors

She's like a rainbow,
coming, colors in the air
Oh, everywhere, she comes in colors

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

Gold
John Stewart

When the lights go down in the California town,
People are in for the evening.
I jump into my car and I throw in my guitar,
My heart beatin' time with my breathin'.
Drivin' over Kanan, singin' to my soul,
There's people out there turnin' music into gold.

Well my buddy Jim Bass he's a-workin' pumpin gas,
And he makes two fifty for an hour.
He's got rythm in his hands as he's tappin' on the cans,
Sings rock and roll in the shower.
Drivin' over Kanan, singin' to my soul,
There's people out there turnin' music into gold.

Ah the California girls are the greatest in the world,
Each one's a song in the making.
Singin' rock to me I can hear the melody,
The story is there for the takin'.
Drivin' over Kanan, singin' to my soul,
There's people out there turnin' music into gold.

Drivin' over Kanan, singin' to my soul,
There's people out there turnin' music into gold.

When the lights go down in the California town,
People are in for the evening.
I jump into my car and I throw in my guitar,
My heart beatin' time with my breathin'.
Drivin' over Kanan, singin' to my soul,
There's people out there turnin' music into gold.

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

não se reprima lyrics by menudo
From the album el reencuentro, 15 años después

Sobe, desce, vamos descer
Sonha, vive como eu
Pula, grita, oh oh oh
Não segure muito teus instintos
Porque isto não é natural.
Saio sério falo a toda
Um grito forte quando quero gritar
É saudavel relaxar-te
Recupera e faz bem a cabeça
Por isso canta, dança, grita oh oh oh ...
Vai a frente entra numa boa,
Porque a vida é uma festa.
Não controle, não domine,
Não modere tudo isso faz muito mal.
Deixe que a mente se relaxe.
Faça o que mandar o coração.
Por isso canta, dança, grita oh oh oh ...
Não se reprima, Não se reprima, Não se reprima.
Não se reprima, Não se reprima, pode gritar.
Não se reprima, Não se reprima, Não se reprima.
Dança, canta, sobe, desce, vive, corre, pula como eu.
Canta, dança sem parar
Sobe, desce, vamos descer
Sonha, vive como eu
Pula, grita, oh oh oh
Chega de fugir, de se esconder
E de deixar a vida pra depois.
Não percebi mas o mundo gira
O tempo corre nada vai te esperar
Entre de cabeça nos teus sonhos,
Só assim você vai ser feliz.
Por isso canta, dança, grita oh oh oh ...
Não se reprima, Não se reprima, Não se reprima.
Não se reprima, Não se reprima, pode gritar.
Não se reprima, Não se reprima, Não se reprima.
Não se reprima, Não se reprima, Não se reprima.
Não se reprima, Não se reprima, pode gritar.

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

G.T.O.
Ronnie & The Daytonas

Little GTO, you're really lookin' fine
Three deuces and a four-speed and a 389
Listen to her tachin' up now, listen to her why-ee-eye-ine
C'mon and turn it on, wind it up, blow it out GTO

Wa-wa, (Yeah, yeah, little GTO)
Wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa (Yeah, yeah, little GTO)
Wa-wa, (Yeah, yeah, little GTO)
Wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa (Yeah, yeah, little GTO) Wa-wa (Ahhh, little GTO)
Wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa

You oughta see her on a road course or a quarter mile
This little modified Pon-Pon has got plenty of style
She beats the gassers and the rail jobs, really drives 'em why-ee-eye-ild
C'mon and turn it on, wind it up, blow it out GTO

Wa-wa, (Yeah, yeah, little GT")
wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa (Yeah, yeah, little GTO)
Wa-wa, (Yeah, yeah, little GTO)
Wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa (Yeah, yeah, little GTO)
Wa-wa (Ahhh, little GTO) Wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa

Gonna save all my money (turnin' it on, blowin' it out) and buy a GTO (turnin' it on, blowin' it out)
Get a helmet and a roll bar (turnin' it on, blowin' it out) and I'll be ready to go (turnin' it on, blowin' it out)
Take it out to Pomona (turnin' it on, blowin' it out) and let 'em know (turnin' it on, blowin' it out), yeah, yeah
That I'm the coolest thing around
Little buddy, gonna shut you down
When I turn it on, wind it up, blow it out GTO

Wa-wa, (Yeah, yeah, little GTO)
Wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa (Yeah, yeah, little GTO)
Wa-wa, (Yeah, yeah, little GT)
Wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa (Yeah, yeah, little GT)
Wa-wa (Ahhh, little GT) Wa, wa, wa, wa, wa, wa
FADE

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

I'M A TRUCK
Bob Stanton

Hello I'm a truck
You've heard songs about truck drivers many times their stories told
How they pulled out of Pittsburg for six days on the road
Bout the Feather River Canyon and climbin' the old grapevine
That old roadhouse down in Texas and the girls they've left behind
You've heard their tales of daring and I think that's just fine
But if you can spare a minute well I'd like to tell you mine

There'd be no truck drivers if it wasn't for us trucks
No double clutching gear jaming coffee drinking nuts
They'll drive their way to glory and they have all the luck
There'd be no truck drivers if it wasn't for us trucks

Well there he sits in that cafe drinking coffee and telling lies
Prob'ly telling 'em how to talk that hill ten miles back
Telling 'em how he missed a gear and that Volkswagen full of hippies
Passed us like I was sitting up on jacks
or how we took that curve over on 66
Han't-a been for me hanging on the shoulder we'd both wound up in the ditch
If we're on time he takes the credit if we're late I get the blame
Up those hills with shutters open my stacks are running flame
My stack a running red light sucking diesel from the tanks
I take him south and bring him back without a word of thanks
So now you've heard my story and I guess it's my tough luck

There'd be no truck drivers if it wadn't for us trucks
There'd be no truck drivers...

Look at him sipping coffee and flirtin' with that waitress
And where do you think he left me that's right next to cattle truck (mooo)
Why couldn't we have put me next to that little pink mack sittin' over there
Gosh she's got pretty mud flaps and talk about stracked they're both chromed
Well he'll be coming out in a minute and he'll get that bar
And he'll go around and beat on my tires
You know for two pints of diesel I'd have a flat on the inside dual
Ha that fixed him I never did like the way he drives anyhow
Thainks he's God's gift to waitresses he never gives 'em a tip
Well I know what he's gonna do now he's gonna take out
The tape cartridge of Back Owens and play it again
I don't know why he don't get a Merle Haggard tape

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

HEAVEN IS IN THE BACK SEAT OF MY CADILLAC
Hot Chocolate

Heaven's in the back seat of my cadillac -
Let me take you there
yeah yeah.
Heaven's in the back seat of my cadillac -
Let me take you there
yeah yeah.

Can't stand it
can't stand it Baby
When I'm close to you I wanna touch you
There are people ev'rywhere
people who like to stare

Can't take it Baby
let's get outta here.

Heaven's in the back seat of my cadillac - . . .
Let's do it
let's do it Baby
Let's go for a ride out in the countryside.
Just me and you far from the city lights
That's much too bright for this kinda lovin'.

Heaven's in the back seat of my cadillac - . . .

Makin' love makin' love with you
Is such a beautiful thing to do.
Makin' love
makin' love with you
Is such a wonderful thing with me and moonlight.

Heaven's in the back seat of my cadillac - . . .

Let's do it let's do it Baby
Let's go for a ride out in the countryside.
There are people ev'rywhere
people who like to stare

Can't take it Baby
let's get outta here.

Makin' love
makin' love with you . . .

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

uncle phil

HEY, LITTLE COBRA
The Rip-Chords

Hey, Little Cobra, don't you know
you're gonna to shut 'em down

I took my Cobra down to the track,
hitched to the back of my Cadillac,
Everyone was there just a waiting for me
There were plenty of Stingrays and XKEs,

Spring little Cobra getting ready to strike
Spring Little Cobra with all your might
Spring little Cobra getting ready to strike
Spring Little Cobra with all your might
Hey, Little Cobra, don't you know
you are going to shut them down

When the flag went down, you could hear rubber burn,
The Stingray pulled me going into the turn
I hung a big shift, and I got into high,
When I when I flew by the Stingray, I waved bye bye.

Spring little Cobra getting ready to strike
Spring Little Cobra with all your might
Spring little Cobra getting ready to strike
Spring Little Cobra with all your might
Hey, Little Cobra, Don't you know you are going to shut 'em down

Around the turn into the straight away
I was blowing off everything that got in my way,
Stingrays and Jags were so far behind
I took my Cobra out of gear and let it coast to the line.

Spring little Cobra getting ready to strike
Spring Little Cobra with all your might
Spring little Cobra getting ready to strike
Spring Little Cobra with all your might
Hey, Little Cobra, Don't you know you are going to shut 'em down
Shut'em down,
shut'em down,
shut'em down...

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.