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Son of the Quote... Endquote Thread
"Ah yes, it feels great to be back! I just wish I could remember...
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... where I stored all my ketchup. I really did like that green color that came out. MMMM, french fries"
"Wait!!! I left my purse in your... |
mothers car! She'll know of all the mischeif about!"
"OMG, the puppy's been.... |
....chewing on my cell phone and now I can't call my mother about the purse! This means that I'll have to...
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stick my hand up the puppy's butt to pull out the phone!"
"I never would have imagined that you could fit a... |
...whole fist into this little puppy!"
"Now If I could only find... |
... monkey into such a small orrifce
I have no idea whats going on becase... |
...I can't tell a phone from a monkey while up this puppy's butt.
This calls for... |
... extra-medium hot sauce!"
"Sometimes I just watch people walk by and imagine myself... |
....sticking cell phones into small orrifices
Tacos.... |
are best served pink"
"Well I knew something was wrong when... |
.... God appeared to me and told me to search for the holy graaail
Don't you remember when the aliens came and... |
...finally restored this forum.
Thanks to Halx, I can finally... |
...watch Life of Brian!!"
"On average, I usually do... |
... smoke alot of weed
Food is good in the ... |
... shaggin wagon"
"Hey, my pants are... |
on the floor!"
"Baby.. wont you pick up my.... |
... dry cleaning?"
"In the town where I was born lived a... |
girl who edited posts faster than lightning ;)"
"Man I love to... |
...man with four nipples.
I wonder if he had two... |
...halfs of a brain"
"I abstain from... |
moderation when I abstain from abstinence."
"Look into the abyss long enough, and... |
you'll see dead people.
Dead people are useful when... |
... the live ones keep saying 'no'."
"It took about three hours and four jars of Vaseline, but I finally... |
...popped the lid off that damned jar of pickles!"
"Honey! Carl Orff's on the phone, he says he wants to know if you liked his... |
...his pet Dog, "Johny." I ran over him on my way home from work, so he's what he had for dinner."
"Hello dear sir, do you release that is not gas you are pumping into your car, rather it is... |
"...jello, 'cause there's always room for it. :p
"Freedom from persecution is..." |
..... getting caught with a measily little joint."
"mother nature grows the best..... |
...pot... no wait, I grow the best pot."
"Please put a penny in the... |
.....call it a slot machine."
"blackjack is the best...... |
......aphrodisiac!
Press Control-Alt-Delete, then..... |
...commence to bang head on keyboard."
"If you can't beat 'em... |
.....smash the fuckin' keyboard with your head."
"damn it's good to be..... *edit* got beat but will still go with answer |
....lick'em."
"When I was your age..... |
... pussy came by the quarter pound, and cheeseburgers were a nickel"
"Once upon a time... |
"... they lived happily ever after."
"If I told you once I've told you..." |
"...once, and once should be enough!"
"By the time I get home from work..." |
...TFP should have more threads made than I can post in 1 day!!!"
"Those who try too hard, only... |
"...look like post whores."
"It's good when your girlfriend isn't... |
...your proctologist"
"Eat my... |
"really a man."
"It's also good when...." |
Sion: .... Beba.. The Uthah White Meat!"
Whoa: ..... they don't try biting your hand off, its much easier to drown them that way." "Who... What.. Where....when..... |
.....why are my pants around my ankles?"
"Try not to get your dink caught in..... |
"in a blender."
"Where did I put my big..." |
... ego?"
"Watch out for..." |
"that tree!"
"Now I just.." |
"...HIV positive..."
"all good things must..." |
"be ate with Tobasci sauce."
"Speaking of Tobasco, where is...." |
"...my left big toe?"
"No more..." |
...Mr. NotSoNice Guy"
"All good things come to... |
"those who are willing to buy it."
"You pierced your...." |
"...nose to get attention, and now you're surprised that I'm stalking you?"
"What comes around..." |
"... continues to go round and round."
"Unless of course.." |
... Is bound be VERY profitable."
"If you drop it,..." |
"...it will fall"
"Fire is fun, except..." |
...when it burns you after you die, as you can no longer watch it"
"Jello is my... |
"...hell"
"Piracy is for..." |
dudes with parrots......"
"as........" |
...the posts mount"
"see no evil, hear no evil... |
.......post no evil."
"Not long until we get our..... |
... boy scout badges for nude oil wrestling, right?"
"This is your idea of dinner? I thought it was... |
"...just a job at the morgue."
"So then the guy with the monkey cuts off..." |
...the audition for the part of "Man at the Bar #3" in his new movie."
"An old friend once told me you should always put your..." |
"...penis in the pink hole."
"All we have to fear is..." |
...Republicans. And Democrats. And religious fanatics. And fundamentalists. And terrorists. And car-jackers. And hi-jackers. And gang-rapists. And inflation. And unemployment. And road-rage. And...."
"On the information superhighway, I am... |
... the unrecognizable roadkill on the center line."
"If there's one thing I've learned from life, it's... |
"that the world is, without doubt, flat."
"In my last life I was..." |
..kicking ass and chewing bubble gum, but i'm all out of bubble gum"
"tastes great.." |
when you suck it."
"Hickory dickory dock ..... |
my cock itches"
"batteries.." |
edited, (faster fingers) |
4 pack... $4.99... batteries not included."
"What would Jesus do for a Klondike bar... would he... |
...find out what the fuck a klondike bar was first?"
"If you hear a bird sqwak above your head... |
then you know that, no it is NOT your mother in law, but a fucking parrot!"
"i really wish i had....." |
"...one of those things, ya know, with the stuff on the one end and the doohickey on the other? You know what I mean. One of them."
"Crazy, but that's how it goes, millions of people..." |
...running around every day with no clear goals in life. All of them taking advantage of everyone and anyone and generally contributing to the general suffering and destruction of society as we know it."
"On a lighter note... |
... I just crapped my pants."
"Would you like to... |
...Shit on my chest?" (remember A Teen Movie)
"If there is one thing you must do in life, it is... |
... NOT, my mother, you asshole"
"The rash showed up right after I... |
......scratched that itch."
why are my pubic hairs...... |
...stuck on my ukelele?"
"Just push the blue button and... |
...coins will fall outta my ass."
"the beat of a drum is like...... |
...a loud, rhythmic boom."
"If you give a mouse a cookie... |
... next thing, he'll be asking for nookie."
"Ask not what your country can do for you... |
...but what you can do to your country without getting caught."
"Its not whether you Win or Lose, Its... |
... ask what you can do to get out of paying its taxes."
"When you have trouble staying awake in a meeting... |
... write a note for everyone else in the meeting letting them know you're about to pass out..... then do so."
"When playing your GameBoy SP in the bathroom at work,... |
Pretend you're masturbating, thay'll respect you more, or fear you"
"Each journey begins with just one... |
"post."
"then i..." |
jammed my fork into the socket vigorously."
"Remember, the only thing we have to fear is.... |
"scary stuff."
"If I were king...." |
"...I'd make all sorts of random laws about things that no one cares about or understands."
"Before you come home, you have to..." |
"...leave home in the first place."
"I could swear I..." |
...left my pants behind your fridge"
"Dont worry, if anything happens... |
I'll marry you.
No, you swerve to HIT a... |
mindless pedestrian...50 points after all.
Thats it, you ruined my... |
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