I'm forming a horde - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Troublebot · 09-09-2003, 07:33 AM

No, not an army. This is a horde! We're gonna roam the countryside, piliging and stealing and basically giving villagers a hard time. We'll wear helmets with horns on 'em and bathe infrequently. Personally, I'm gonna grow a kick ass fu-manchu mustache.

So, anyone want to join the Troublebot Horde? I'll supply the horses and simitars, you supply the attitude. Come up with a good horde name and a place you want to invade and we'll kick this horde off right.

Troublebot
Poorly Washed Horde Leader.

rockogre · 09-09-2003, 09:45 AM

Finally, a club for the rest of us. I'd just love some good pillaging and burning. I will just bring my own battle axe but I really want one of those helmets with horns. I want one with the fur trim.

I say we invade Rodeo Drive, lots of money and wimmen. They won't know what hit em.

I'm gonna be Buttcrust the Berserker during horde hours.

Troublebot · 09-09-2003, 10:00 AM

Welcome Buttcrust!

Rodeo Drive is an excellent choice for a horde invasion. I'm going to make sure I leave with a Bentley. It should look good with the horned helmet.

tinfoil · 09-09-2003, 10:15 AM

Can I be lazy in this horde of yours, sir?

For I must be lazy. In fact, I am too lazy to be lazy. Lazy is too much work.

Troublebot · 09-09-2003, 10:20 AM

Tinfoil,

Well, you'll have to contribute in some way. Buttcrust will be cooking all the small dogs we find on Rodeo Drive and I'll be drawing up battle plans in my Bentley. What can you contribute?

Troublebot the Stinky
Grand Horde Poobah

tinfoil · 09-09-2003, 10:25 AM

My charming attitude and clever tongue.

I'll be your Public Relations rep!

Troublebot · 09-09-2003, 10:30 AM

Interesting Tinfoil, you are in. I'm waiting to see what kind of "spin" you can put on us demolishing Rodeo Drive.

Since you have not named yourself, I dub you Tinfoil The Unholy!

Troublebot the Unwashed,
Head Horde Cheese

tinfoil · 09-09-2003, 10:36 AM

Rodeo Drive?

Why, Rodeo Drive and it's inhabitants will benefit from the horde's pillaging.

Your businesses will be turning great profit as inhabitants purchase goods to replace those the horde has pillaged, only to be pillaged again.

Home Depot will be swimming in loot (until it is pillaged) as home owners come to purchase goods to finish home improvement project that the horde started. I bet you didn't even know you wanted a window in that wall!

Troublebot · 09-09-2003, 10:53 AM

Excellent work Tinfoil, remind me not to kill you.

Troublebot the Greasy and Matted
Big Horde Kahuna

Giant Hamburger · 09-09-2003, 12:48 PM

Hail Khan Troublebot!

I would join your horde if there be room for one such as I.

Here is my resume:

I have longed to cut a gory swath of red ruin through those that would stand in my rightful way since my dark god began whispering to me. I will split the fearful faces of those that oppose my wrought iron will, spilling their broken teeth upon the bloodstained floor. Their savaged ears will decorate the supple necks of my women, women that were once theirs. I will drink their finest wines from the skulls of their dear, sweet children. My story will be written on their skins. I will weave my blade into a net of steel wreathing myself with dead until my sword is too heavy too lift. My wrath might destroy us all and I care not as long as all is destroyed with me.

For generations, people will not name their children Giant Hamburger.
-GH

uncle phil · 09-09-2003, 12:55 PM

i, uncle phil, would like to be the menstrual...er, minstrel of the horde and as a sample of my abilities, i submit the following dinner-hour background music:

"By the light of the Tennessee moon
From the bilious bubbles of a black lagoon
They make a hound dog howl a SWAT team swoon
Hot frogs on the loose

They've multiplied since '53
Slurping nuclear debris
Amphibious fabulous fancy free
Hot frogs on the loose

CHORUS:
Hippity hoppity here they come
Radioactive lookin' for fun
If you kiss 'em look out for the tongue
Hot frogs on the loose

They got little skinny legs and big bug eyes
Fraternizing's not advised
They like you like they like flies
Hot frogs on the loose

They got a chicken nugget body and a whopper leap
In your bedroom while you sleep
They'll make your Geiger counter beep
Hot frogs on the loose

CHORUS

You can put the pedal to the metal till the rubber squeals
Squish 'em with your tires you got hot wheels
How you know how it feels to be a
Hot frog on the loose

Please do not keep them as pets
Sauteing them may bring regrets
Make a citizen's arrest of a
Hot frog on the loose

Frogs for peace frogs for defense
Don't be nervous don't be tense
We've got a sure-fire three-foot fence
To keep the hot frogs from gettin loose"

Troublebot · 09-09-2003, 12:57 PM

Hail Giant Hamburger!

You will be my second in command! The four of us will cut a swath across this land not seen since Sherman and Georgia! Soon, others will join us and we will crush all those that would oppose the Troublebot Horde!

Here is your simitar and your horse, her name is Rosemarie.

Who else will join our fearsome horde? Who else wants to enjoy riches and glory beyond their wildest dreams? Join me and my jewel encrusted bentley today!

Troublebot the Difficult to Get Along With,
Kahn,
Troublebot Horde

krwlz · 09-09-2003, 01:00 PM

Can I join your army? And like Buttcrust, I will supply my own weapon... I always had a fondness for the flail...

Other then that, I can be one mean bastard...thats always good right?

Troublebot · 09-09-2003, 01:01 PM

Hail Uncle Phil the Tunesmith, Minstrel of the Troublebot Horde!

Thank you for your wonderful tune, I will allow you the pleasure of riding in the Bentley, which should ease your tunemaking!

Troublebot the Possibly Unloved,
Kahn,
Toublebot Horde

Troublebot · 09-09-2003, 01:03 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by krwlz
Can I join your army? And like Buttcrust, I will supply my own weapon... I always had a fondness for the flail...

Other then that, I can be one mean bastard...thats always good right?

Yes! You will be Krwlz the Hard Rocking! Flail away my horde breatheren, flail away!

uncle phil · 09-09-2003, 01:14 PM

/me is busy composing our first "after-pillage" melody...

jimk · 09-09-2003, 01:19 PM

i say we invade ohio, dig it up to make another lake & inhabit michigan, which will then be (almost) an island. we can worry about that little indiana problem later.......

Troublebot · 09-09-2003, 01:25 PM

Sorry jimk the damp and deadly, but we cannot invade Ohio. It is the place of my birth and holds strong feelings for me. Could we invade Tennesee or West Virginia instead?

Welcome to the Horde. Here's your simitar and horse. If you can harmonize, go talk to Uncle Phil.

Troublebot the Itchy
Kahn,
Troublebot Horde

Thraeryn · 09-09-2003, 01:32 PM

I long to join your horde! I bring with me hand- and foot-claws such as the assassins in the Diablo II expansion wield. With them, I shall wash the ground in the blood of the innocent as I cut through the cowering masses like a whirlwind of death. After my coming, there shall not be ground visible through the mangled flesh strewn atop it.

Yes, Redmond, WA and its banks, credit unions, and savings & loans will all fear The Thraeryn!

jimk · 09-09-2003, 01:41 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Troublebot
Ohio. It is the place of my birth and holds strong feelings for me.
Troublebot the Itchy
Kahn,
Troublebot Horde

i know not if i can join a horde led by a buckeye.......how can i know your guidance will be pure & untainted by woody hayes dogma??????

damp & deadly? you are a fine snap judge of character - i'll give you that.

theguyondacouch · 09-09-2003, 01:46 PM

I will join your horde! I too can suply my own weapon, the magical double way dildo. It holds a god like smack.

Sir Clitoricus

tinfoil · 09-09-2003, 03:07 PM

For immediate release:

The Hord (tm) has announced it's intentions for a hostile takeover of West Virgina.

Troublebot, itchy and unloved bottle washer for The Hord, has declared this to be a fine day for West Virginia. 'For so long have the West Virginians been under the yoke of an opressive government. A government which brought forth horror after unspeakable horror, such as the state slogan 'Wild, Wonderful'. We of The Horde are here to free you of your government. No longer will you be held down by their lackluster marketing skills. Prepare for a new era!'

'Oh, and if you see Sir Clitoricus, tell him to go easy with that magic dildo of his. He almost poked out my eye.'

State leaders were quoted, saying 'Meh.'

West Virginians weer generally pleased with the situation. 'Once you get used to the looting, you hardly know they are there! And hey, I always wanted a door there!'

Robert Kocharian, President of Armenia has spoken with Giant Hamburger, head of valet parking for The Horde, and extended his congratulations. 'Clearly The Horde is a just and fearsome force.'

The Sultan and Prim Minister of Brunei, Sir Bolkiah Hassanal claims Mr. Kocharian's remarks were under made duress, however any attempts to contact the Sultan have resulted in maniacal laughter.

-----

The Horde (TM) is a newly formed organization with aims to revolutionalise the looting industry.

Formed in 2003, The Horde began it's whirlwind tour with the succesful takeover of Rodeo Drive. Pundits have hailed the move as impressive and as a mark of The Horde's mastery.

The Horde is available for private parties and state / country takeovers. Please contact Troublebot for more information.

bundy · 09-09-2003, 05:24 PM

i will ride with your great horde, troublebot.

i am a great scout... and being Australian i possess an incredible to shout, CRIKEY!!, just like the crocodile hunter. i have also ridden giant kangaroos to school every day, fought and killed thousands of killer crocodiles and fought the barbarous Kiwis with gusto and honour.

tinfoil · 09-09-2003, 06:05 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by bundy
i will ride with your great horde, troublebot.

i am a great scout... and being Australian i possess an incredible to shout, CRIKEY!!, just like the crocodile hunter. i have also ridden giant kangaroos to school every day, fought and killed thousands of killer crocodiles and fought the barbarous Kiwis with gusto and honour.

However, did you shove your thumb up it's ass Cartman-style?

krwlz · 09-09-2003, 06:09 PM

I think we need a good solid horde slogan....

Hard8s · 09-09-2003, 06:34 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Troublebot
I'll supply the horses and simitars, you supply the attitude. Come up with a good horde name and a place you want to invade and we'll kick this horde off right.

Troublebot
Poorly Washed Horde Leader.

I would join your Horde, but there have been way to many spelling and capitalization errors. First, its scimitar not simitar. Second, any time you refer to the Horde it should be capitalized, unless its just any horde, then its not.

Quote:

Originally posted by jimk
i say we invade ohio, dig it up to make another lake & inhabit michigan, which will then be (almost) an island. we can worry about that little indiana problem later.......

Again with the capitalization problem. Its never 'i' It's 'I' and then Ohio, Michigan, and Indiana are all proper nouns and get capitilized as well.

If we can get all this straightened out then I might think about joining. People do not want to masacre'd by a bunch of heathen unless they are punctually, and gramatically correct heathens. Besides who's not up for some plundering and pillaging and tasting of the local lasses!

vermin · 09-09-2003, 06:54 PM

I, too, would volunteer for the horde. As an experienced wolf-master I feel your horde could benefit greatly from having savage rabid animals at its beck and call. One unique feature of the wolves I've trained myself, is that they have a special bloodlust for law-school graduates. I think it's the smell of the sheepskin. I won't need to be supplied with a horse, however I could use a good scimitar.

Vermin the Unmentionable,
horde applicant

P.S. I've also got a small wolverine which can be sicced on those overly concerned with grammar and punctuation. Just a thought.

BuddyHawks · 09-09-2003, 08:07 PM

Hail Chieftain!
I, BuddyHawks the Moderately Strong, have long traveled this country in search of a warrior organization focused on looting and destruction. Having been raised in a primarily Horde oriented environment, I have become efficient in the basics of sword flailing and making loud noises. I feel that I, as a warrior, have much to offer Horde Troublebot and will do my best to bring disgrace to our enemies. The only pillaging equipment I already own is a stylish, plaid kilt that I bought off ebay; but just give me a scimitar and a mount, and I will be ready to ride!

bundy · 09-09-2003, 08:33 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by tinfoil

However, did you shove your thumb up it's ass Cartman-style?

yes, this is an ancient tradition among my people.
it really pisses off the beast, and makes if a more honourable, manly victory.

uncle phil · 09-10-2003, 03:44 AM

Drink, drink, wherever we may be
We are the drunk and disorderly
And we will drink wherever we may be
For we are the drunk and disorderly...

I was drunk last night
I was drunk the night before
And I'm gonna get drunk like I've never been drunk before
Cos when we're drunk we're as happy as can be ...
For we are the drunk and disorderly

Midlandmadman · 09-10-2003, 05:20 AM

personally i don't think you have enough members to be a horde............ I would join but i think I joined that other guys gang.... we all carry AK-47's..... I think your battle axes and double bladed dildos will lose that fight....DOWN WITH THIS HORDE!!!!!

edit... oh wait I didnt join that gang .. I thought i did.... I guess I have nothing against this horde..... GO HORDE!!!!!!!

Troublebot · 09-10-2003, 05:29 AM

Midlandmadman, do you not realize that your puny AK-47's are no match for the oppressive stink of our horde (excuse me Hard8's, Horde)? Your bullets will simply bounce of our disgustingly dirty bodies. I pity you and your so-called "gang."

As for the others, welcome to the Horde. Grab a weapon and a horse. Speak to Hard8s for proper english instruction. We ride on West Virginia at first light.

Troublebot the challenged
Kahn,
Troublebot Horde

Troublebot · 09-10-2003, 05:34 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by jimk
i know not if i can join a horde led by a buckeye.......how can i know your guidance will be pure & untainted by woody hayes dogma??????

damp & deadly? you are a fine snap judge of character - i'll give you that.

jimk the damp and deadly,

I leave the buckeye cheering to my hormone-imbalanced relatives. Why watch football when you can pilage and listen to the lamentations of your enemy's women? Woody Hayes is not fit to groom my Fu-Manchu.

As for your name, I call them as I see them.

Thraeryn · 09-10-2003, 05:37 AM

Being both The Thraeryn and drunk, I demand that we ride on Redmond, Washington next. The banks, credit unions, and savings and loan companies must fear our fearsome weaponry and our more fearsome stench! Plus, bank tellers are usually pretty hot!

tinfoil · 09-10-2003, 06:45 AM

Redmond, the heart of all that is truly evil. A truly daunting task indeed. However, with The Thraeryn's powers of hatology, we shall prevail!

Also, I notice the lack of lusty wenches in our horde (voluntarily). This should be a priority.

baaa · 09-10-2003, 08:57 AM

Major Hangage reporting for doody sir!

Troublebot · 09-10-2003, 09:05 AM

Welcome to the Horde Baaa. Grab a horse and ride my Horde brother!

Quote:

Originally posted by tinfoil
Also, I notice the lack of lusty wenches in our horde (voluntarily). This should be a priority.

I noticed that too Tinfoil the Unholy. Anyone know of any battle-scarred female warriors that might want to join up? We're heading to Washington state soon, perhaps their lusty bank tellers would dare to ride with us!

Troublebot the Lonely
Kahn,
Troublebot Horde

jimk · 09-10-2003, 09:23 AM

perhaps a bit of levity is in order for the minions.........

how does vlad the impaler's favorite joke begin?

this bar goes into a guy.......

-jimk the damp & deadly (& don rickles-like)

rockogre · 09-10-2003, 09:29 AM

/berserk

Slash
Burn
smash
crush
drink
laugh
slash
burn
smash
crush
IF CRUSH >= 12 STOP ELSE GOTO 1

/end berserk

REDMOND! We come for you, know fear!

Mr Scorcex · 09-10-2003, 12:31 PM

I would be honored to join your filthy horde. I currently go by Scorcex The Slightly Maligned, and quite enjoy pillaging and looting. I consider myself quite skilled at smithing, and as such I can produce large numbers of crudely made but deadly scimitars for the horde's use. Also, if I may be so bold, I suggest Hard8s as the next target of our horde. Grammar and spelling and the like have no place in a horde!

09-09-2003, 07:33 AM	#1 (permalink)
Troublebot Intently Rocking Location: Davey's	I'm forming a horde No, not an army. This is a horde! We're gonna roam the countryside, piliging and stealing and basically giving villagers a hard time. We'll wear helmets with horns on 'em and bathe infrequently. Personally, I'm gonna grow a kick ass fu-manchu mustache. So, anyone want to join the Troublebot Horde? I'll supply the horses and simitars, you supply the attitude. Come up with a good horde name and a place you want to invade and we'll kick this horde off right. Troublebot Poorly Washed Horde Leader. __________________ Howard Moon: The wind is my only friend. Wind: [whistling] I hate you.

09-09-2003, 09:45 AM	#2 (permalink)
rockogre I aim to misbehave! Location: SW Oklahoma	Finally, a club for the rest of us. I'd just love some good pillaging and burning. I will just bring my own battle axe but I really want one of those helmets with horns. I want one with the fur trim. I say we invade Rodeo Drive, lots of money and wimmen. They won't know what hit em. I'm gonna be Buttcrust the Berserker during horde hours. __________________ Only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you, Jesus Christ and the American G. I. One died for your soul, the other for your freedom

09-09-2003, 10:00 AM	#3 (permalink)
Troublebot Intently Rocking Location: Davey's	Welcome Buttcrust! Rodeo Drive is an excellent choice for a horde invasion. I'm going to make sure I leave with a Bentley. It should look good with the horned helmet. __________________ Howard Moon: The wind is my only friend. Wind: [whistling] I hate you.

09-09-2003, 10:15 AM	#4 (permalink)
tinfoil Fucking Hostile Location: Springford, ON, Canada	Can I be lazy in this horde of yours, sir? For I must be lazy. In fact, I am too lazy to be lazy. Lazy is too much work. __________________ Get off your fuckin cross. We need the fuckin space to nail the next fool martyr.

09-09-2003, 10:20 AM	#5 (permalink)
Troublebot Intently Rocking Location: Davey's	Tinfoil, Well, you'll have to contribute in some way. Buttcrust will be cooking all the small dogs we find on Rodeo Drive and I'll be drawing up battle plans in my Bentley. What can you contribute? Troublebot the Stinky Grand Horde Poobah __________________ Howard Moon: The wind is my only friend. Wind: [whistling] I hate you.

09-09-2003, 10:25 AM	#6 (permalink)
tinfoil Fucking Hostile Location: Springford, ON, Canada	My charming attitude and clever tongue. I'll be your Public Relations rep! __________________ Get off your fuckin cross. We need the fuckin space to nail the next fool martyr.

09-09-2003, 10:30 AM	#7 (permalink)
Troublebot Intently Rocking Location: Davey's	Interesting Tinfoil, you are in. I'm waiting to see what kind of "spin" you can put on us demolishing Rodeo Drive. Since you have not named yourself, I dub you Tinfoil The Unholy! Troublebot the Unwashed, Head Horde Cheese __________________ Howard Moon: The wind is my only friend. Wind: [whistling] I hate you.

09-09-2003, 10:36 AM	#8 (permalink)
tinfoil Fucking Hostile Location: Springford, ON, Canada	Rodeo Drive? Why, Rodeo Drive and it's inhabitants will benefit from the horde's pillaging. Your businesses will be turning great profit as inhabitants purchase goods to replace those the horde has pillaged, only to be pillaged again. Home Depot will be swimming in loot (until it is pillaged) as home owners come to purchase goods to finish home improvement project that the horde started. I bet you didn't even know you wanted a window in that wall! __________________ Get off your fuckin cross. We need the fuckin space to nail the next fool martyr.

09-09-2003, 10:53 AM	#9 (permalink)
Troublebot Intently Rocking Location: Davey's	Excellent work Tinfoil, remind me not to kill you. Troublebot the Greasy and Matted Big Horde Kahuna __________________ Howard Moon: The wind is my only friend. Wind: [whistling] I hate you.

09-09-2003, 12:48 PM	#10 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	Hail Khan Troublebot! I would join your horde if there be room for one such as I. Here is my resume: I have longed to cut a gory swath of red ruin through those that would stand in my rightful way since my dark god began whispering to me. I will split the fearful faces of those that oppose my wrought iron will, spilling their broken teeth upon the bloodstained floor. Their savaged ears will decorate the supple necks of my women, women that were once theirs. I will drink their finest wines from the skulls of their dear, sweet children. My story will be written on their skins. I will weave my blade into a net of steel wreathing myself with dead until my sword is too heavy too lift. My wrath might destroy us all and I care not as long as all is destroyed with me. For generations, people will not name their children Giant Hamburger. -GH

09-09-2003, 12:55 PM	#11 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	i, uncle phil, would like to be the menstrual...er, minstrel of the horde and as a sample of my abilities, i submit the following dinner-hour background music: "By the light of the Tennessee moon From the bilious bubbles of a black lagoon They make a hound dog howl a SWAT team swoon Hot frogs on the loose They've multiplied since '53 Slurping nuclear debris Amphibious fabulous fancy free Hot frogs on the loose CHORUS: Hippity hoppity here they come Radioactive lookin' for fun If you kiss 'em look out for the tongue Hot frogs on the loose They got little skinny legs and big bug eyes Fraternizing's not advised They like you like they like flies Hot frogs on the loose They got a chicken nugget body and a whopper leap In your bedroom while you sleep They'll make your Geiger counter beep Hot frogs on the loose CHORUS You can put the pedal to the metal till the rubber squeals Squish 'em with your tires you got hot wheels How you know how it feels to be a Hot frog on the loose Please do not keep them as pets Sauteing them may bring regrets Make a citizen's arrest of a Hot frog on the loose Frogs for peace frogs for defense Don't be nervous don't be tense We've got a sure-fire three-foot fence To keep the hot frogs from gettin loose" __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

09-09-2003, 12:57 PM	#12 (permalink)
Troublebot Intently Rocking Location: Davey's	Hail Giant Hamburger! You will be my second in command! The four of us will cut a swath across this land not seen since Sherman and Georgia! Soon, others will join us and we will crush all those that would oppose the Troublebot Horde! Here is your simitar and your horse, her name is Rosemarie. Who else will join our fearsome horde? Who else wants to enjoy riches and glory beyond their wildest dreams? Join me and my jewel encrusted bentley today! Troublebot the Difficult to Get Along With, Kahn, Troublebot Horde __________________ Howard Moon: The wind is my only friend. Wind: [whistling] I hate you.

09-09-2003, 01:00 PM	#13 (permalink)
krwlz Fledgling Dead Head Location: Clarkson U.	Can I join your army? And like Buttcrust, I will supply my own weapon... I always had a fondness for the flail... Other then that, I can be one mean bastard...thats always good right?

09-09-2003, 01:01 PM	#14 (permalink)
Troublebot Intently Rocking Location: Davey's	Hail Uncle Phil the Tunesmith, Minstrel of the Troublebot Horde! Thank you for your wonderful tune, I will allow you the pleasure of riding in the Bentley, which should ease your tunemaking! Troublebot the Possibly Unloved, Kahn, Toublebot Horde __________________ Howard Moon: The wind is my only friend. Wind: [whistling] I hate you.

09-09-2003, 01:14 PM	#16 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	/me is busy composing our first "after-pillage" melody... __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

09-09-2003, 01:19 PM	#17 (permalink)
jimk Addict Location: Chicago	i say we invade ohio, dig it up to make another lake & inhabit michigan, which will then be (almost) an island. we can worry about that little indiana problem later....... __________________ raw power is a guaranteed o.d. raw power is a laughin' at you & me -iggy

09-09-2003, 01:25 PM	#18 (permalink)
Troublebot Intently Rocking Location: Davey's	Sorry jimk the damp and deadly, but we cannot invade Ohio. It is the place of my birth and holds strong feelings for me. Could we invade Tennesee or West Virginia instead? Welcome to the Horde. Here's your simitar and horse. If you can harmonize, go talk to Uncle Phil. Troublebot the Itchy Kahn, Troublebot Horde __________________ Howard Moon: The wind is my only friend. Wind: [whistling] I hate you.

09-09-2003, 01:32 PM	#19 (permalink)
Thraeryn Loser	I long to join your horde! I bring with me hand- and foot-claws such as the assassins in the Diablo II expansion wield. With them, I shall wash the ground in the blood of the innocent as I cut through the cowering masses like a whirlwind of death. After my coming, there shall not be ground visible through the mangled flesh strewn atop it. Yes, Redmond, WA and its banks, credit unions, and savings & loans will all fear The Thraeryn!

09-09-2003, 01:46 PM	#21 (permalink)
theguyondacouch salmon? Location: Outside Providence	I will join your horde! I too can suply my own weapon, the magical double way dildo. It holds a god like smack. Sir Clitoricus __________________ "Lick my frozen metal ass!"

09-09-2003, 03:07 PM	#22 (permalink)
tinfoil Fucking Hostile Location: Springford, ON, Canada	For immediate release: The Hord (tm) has announced it's intentions for a hostile takeover of West Virgina. Troublebot, itchy and unloved bottle washer for The Hord, has declared this to be a fine day for West Virginia. 'For so long have the West Virginians been under the yoke of an opressive government. A government which brought forth horror after unspeakable horror, such as the state slogan 'Wild, Wonderful'. We of The Horde are here to free you of your government. No longer will you be held down by their lackluster marketing skills. Prepare for a new era!' 'Oh, and if you see Sir Clitoricus, tell him to go easy with that magic dildo of his. He almost poked out my eye.' State leaders were quoted, saying 'Meh.' West Virginians weer generally pleased with the situation. 'Once you get used to the looting, you hardly know they are there! And hey, I always wanted a door there!' Robert Kocharian, President of Armenia has spoken with Giant Hamburger, head of valet parking for The Horde, and extended his congratulations. 'Clearly The Horde is a just and fearsome force.' The Sultan and Prim Minister of Brunei, Sir Bolkiah Hassanal claims Mr. Kocharian's remarks were under made duress, however any attempts to contact the Sultan have resulted in maniacal laughter. ----- The Horde (TM) is a newly formed organization with aims to revolutionalise the looting industry. Formed in 2003, The Horde began it's whirlwind tour with the succesful takeover of Rodeo Drive. Pundits have hailed the move as impressive and as a mark of The Horde's mastery. The Horde is available for private parties and state / country takeovers. Please contact Troublebot for more information. __________________ Get off your fuckin cross. We need the fuckin space to nail the next fool martyr.

09-09-2003, 05:24 PM	#23 (permalink)
bundy . Location: Tokyo	i will ride with your great horde, troublebot. i am a great scout... and being Australian i possess an incredible to shout, CRIKEY!!, just like the crocodile hunter. i have also ridden giant kangaroos to school every day, fought and killed thousands of killer crocodiles and fought the barbarous Kiwis with gusto and honour. __________________ Ohayo!!!

09-09-2003, 06:09 PM	#25 (permalink)
krwlz Fledgling Dead Head Location: Clarkson U.	I think we need a good solid horde slogan....

09-09-2003, 06:54 PM	#27 (permalink)
vermin Indifferent to anti-matter Location: Tucson, AZ	I, too, would volunteer for the horde. As an experienced wolf-master I feel your horde could benefit greatly from having savage rabid animals at its beck and call. One unique feature of the wolves I've trained myself, is that they have a special bloodlust for law-school graduates. I think it's the smell of the sheepskin. I won't need to be supplied with a horse, however I could use a good scimitar. Vermin the Unmentionable, horde applicant P.S. I've also got a small wolverine which can be sicced on those overly concerned with grammar and punctuation. Just a thought. __________________ If puns were sausages, this would be the wurst. Last edited by vermin; 09-09-2003 at 06:58 PM..

09-09-2003, 08:07 PM	#28 (permalink)
BuddyHawks Swashbuckling Location: Iowa...sometimes	Hail Chieftain! I, BuddyHawks the Moderately Strong, have long traveled this country in search of a warrior organization focused on looting and destruction. Having been raised in a primarily Horde oriented environment, I have become efficient in the basics of sword flailing and making loud noises. I feel that I, as a warrior, have much to offer Horde Troublebot and will do my best to bring disgrace to our enemies. The only pillaging equipment I already own is a stylish, plaid kilt that I bought off ebay; but just give me a scimitar and a mount, and I will be ready to ride!

09-10-2003, 03:44 AM	#30 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	Drink, drink, wherever we may be We are the drunk and disorderly And we will drink wherever we may be For we are the drunk and disorderly... I was drunk last night I was drunk the night before And I'm gonna get drunk like I've never been drunk before Cos when we're drunk we're as happy as can be ... For we are the drunk and disorderly __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

09-10-2003, 05:20 AM	#31 (permalink)
Midlandmadman Redwing fan extraordinaire Location: Michigan	personally i don't think you have enough members to be a horde............ I would join but i think I joined that other guys gang.... we all carry AK-47's..... I think your battle axes and double bladed dildos will lose that fight....DOWN WITH THIS HORDE!!!!! edit... oh wait I didnt join that gang .. I thought i did.... I guess I have nothing against this horde..... GO HORDE!!!!!!! __________________ Its good to be back. Last edited by Midlandmadman; 09-10-2003 at 05:23 AM..

09-10-2003, 05:29 AM	#32 (permalink)
Troublebot Intently Rocking Location: Davey's	Midlandmadman, do you not realize that your puny AK-47's are no match for the oppressive stink of our horde (excuse me Hard8's, Horde)? Your bullets will simply bounce of our disgustingly dirty bodies. I pity you and your so-called "gang." As for the others, welcome to the Horde. Grab a weapon and a horse. Speak to Hard8s for proper english instruction. We ride on West Virginia at first light. Troublebot the challenged Kahn, Troublebot Horde __________________ Howard Moon: The wind is my only friend. Wind: [whistling] I hate you.

09-10-2003, 05:37 AM	#34 (permalink)
Thraeryn Loser	Being both The Thraeryn and drunk, I demand that we ride on Redmond, Washington next. The banks, credit unions, and savings and loan companies must fear our fearsome weaponry and our more fearsome stench! Plus, bank tellers are usually pretty hot!

09-10-2003, 06:45 AM	#35 (permalink)
tinfoil Fucking Hostile Location: Springford, ON, Canada	Redmond, the heart of all that is truly evil. A truly daunting task indeed. However, with The Thraeryn's powers of hatology, we shall prevail! Also, I notice the lack of lusty wenches in our horde (voluntarily). This should be a priority. __________________ Get off your fuckin cross. We need the fuckin space to nail the next fool martyr.

09-10-2003, 08:57 AM	#36 (permalink)
baaa Banned Location: ville	Major Hangage reporting for doody sir!

09-10-2003, 09:23 AM	#38 (permalink)
jimk Addict Location: Chicago	perhaps a bit of levity is in order for the minions......... how does vlad the impaler's favorite joke begin? this bar goes into a guy....... -jimk the damp & deadly (& don rickles-like) __________________ raw power is a guaranteed o.d. raw power is a laughin' at you & me -iggy

09-10-2003, 09:29 AM	#39 (permalink)
rockogre I aim to misbehave! Location: SW Oklahoma	/berserk Slash Burn smash crush drink laugh slash burn smash crush IF CRUSH >= 12 STOP ELSE GOTO 1 /end berserk REDMOND! We come for you, know fear! __________________ Only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you, Jesus Christ and the American G. I. One died for your soul, the other for your freedom Last edited by rockogre; 09-10-2003 at 09:33 AM..

09-10-2003, 12:31 PM	#40 (permalink)
Mr Scorcex Insane Location: Colorado	I would be honored to join your filthy horde. I currently go by Scorcex The Slightly Maligned, and quite enjoy pillaging and looting. I consider myself quite skilled at smithing, and as such I can produce large numbers of crudely made but deadly scimitars for the horde's use. Also, if I may be so bold, I suggest Hard8s as the next target of our horde. Grammar and spelling and the like have no place in a horde!