YzermanS19

Miranda, NO! The man is cut off! As is the rest of the bar. Go home, sober up, write some poetry, and have sex.

But dont drink for 24 hours!

__________________
the light that burns twice as bright
burns half as long

and you have burned so very, very brightly

richeee

No, fly, it was the long dry spell without a waitress, combined with the crap-bands that got to me. Miranda has saved me...
Thanks for the concern, bro'!

__________________
Pas le cri, le coeur de Minx! .... Where can I stare now?.........I did!!!What about You?

vermin

Well, no point going into a dry bar.

*turns around and walks out again*

__________________
If puns were sausages, this would be the wurst.

YzermanS19

Still have the casino downstairs. Theres just been way too much craziness here.

The kitchen is still open too. Omlettes are good for hangovers.

__________________
the light that burns twice as bright
burns half as long

and you have burned so very, very brightly

richeee

WooHoo!! Tequila Omelettes for all!!!!

__________________
Pas le cri, le coeur de Minx! .... Where can I stare now?.........I did!!!What about You?

vermin

*walks back in*

I'll have a bacon and cheddar omlette, no milk.

*walks over to empty bandstand, picks up a guitar, turns all the knobs up to eleven, rips into "Just Got Paid" by ZZTop*

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If puns were sausages, this would be the wurst.

KWSN

KWSN thinks you got yo'self a job, william_wallace.

As a matter of fact, Yzerman, KWSN just ran out of napalm the other day. He could use a refill.

Oh, and by the way, KWSN has quite the stockpile of illicit materials in his car, and he needs to offload some. If you're interested, meet him behind the bodega on 44 and 8.

__________________
Your arms are broken!

YzermanS19

I'll let this slide.

*begins making omelettes for everyone*

Hope you like yours with mushrooms and cheese....cuz thats what your getting.

KW-- I made another batch of Napalm too. Its out back...in the van.

__________________
the light that burns twice as bright
burns half as long

and you have burned so very, very brightly

vermin

*After the ZZTop and three Tool songs, I put down the guitar to eat the omlette*

Could I get a side order of Napalm to go with this omlette?

__________________
If puns were sausages, this would be the wurst.

KWSN

Thanks for the napalm, Yzerman. KWSN appreciates it quite a bit.

Now, have you any interest in parts of KWSN's stockpile? He needs to get rid of it fast, there might be a lead on him.

__________________
Your arms are broken!

richeee

*Miranda grabs richeee and takes him upstairs to the honeymoon suite*

__________________
Pas le cri, le coeur de Minx! .... Where can I stare now?.........I did!!!What about You?

YzermanS19

Put what you need hidden upstairs. They'll never find it. If they do, they'll have to deal with the "beast"

What the beast is, I don't rightly know.

__________________
the light that burns twice as bright
burns half as long

and you have burned so very, very brightly

KWSN

Thank you for the storage, Yzerman. KWSN is very grateful.

Anyone in the building can just come to KWSN if they are interested...

__________________
Your arms are broken!

william_wallace

:: finishes oiling newly sharpened claymore ::

Thanks for the job KWSN. Question: does it matter if any offenders happen to lose any body parts, and if so, which ones would you prefer they lose?

__________________
I'm the Ninja Storm Trooper Division Commander in qpid's liberation army so we can take over the world before Microsoft does. Join the Revolution!

“If it weren’t for my horse, I wouldn’t have spent that year in college...”
- some woman that Lewis Black heard in IHOP

YzermanS19

All of them. Spare no part.

Anyway, I guess I'm cutting the dry spell short. Its been about 12 hours, and we're back selling alcohol.

wrkime, retap the kegs.

*lines up shot glasses for the morning crowd*

__________________
the light that burns twice as bright
burns half as long

and you have burned so very, very brightly

SaltPork

consider the kegs re-tapped, CO2 on and ready to go....new case of glasses opened and chilled...ashtrays cleaned, bar wiped down, floors mopped.

__________________
It was like that when I got here....I swear.

YzermanS19

Good job. I like the ol bar. Nice mahogany, crafted in Ireland. Finest drinking there possible. Finest beer spilled on it.

wrkime- expect a Christmas bonus this year!

__________________
the light that burns twice as bright
burns half as long

and you have burned so very, very brightly

Go_AVS

Does anyone know where Joey B is, I heard we all get to take shots at him with a hammer for only $5 bucks.

__________________
MIA...

JoeyB

***JoeyB walks in, suddenly pulls down his pants and puts his weiner on the bar.

For some unknown reason, he challenges anyone to hit it with a hammer for 5 dollars. ***

__________________
My mom is a Diamondbacks fan. She really likes the Big Unit

JoeyB

Hi, Go_AVS, you can hit this with a hammer for 5 bucks....

__________________
My mom is a Diamondbacks fan. She really likes the Big Unit

Go_AVS

*Go_AVS hands Joey a twenty*

The first shot only grazes joey's thing, I think the next shots are going to be a little harder, joey looks cold. The next shot catches good, I cringe and can not believe I just did that. I throw the hammer out the front door. Joey is still on the floor screaming. I guess we better get him an ambulance or get him to the hospital.

I tell him sorry, I was not thinking after several scothes.

I go back to the bar for another drink...


then start laughing...

__________________
MIA...

JoeyB

A little help down here?

I know I asked for it, but getting whacked with a hammer hurts more than a little bit.

I apologize for bringing this into your establishment, but

I NEED A DOCTOR!

__________________
My mom is a Diamondbacks fan. She really likes the Big Unit

JoeyB

*Embarrassed and in excrutiating pain, JoeyB struggles to his knees and crawls towards the door.

He finds the strength to apologize to everyone within earshot for the disruption. *


Sorry everyone, next time I'm buying...and I promise to keep my pants up.


*JoeyB lowers his head and crawls out the door*

__________________
My mom is a Diamondbacks fan. She really likes the Big Unit

Go_AVS

Hey bartender, how about another Macallan 18 on the rocks..

__________________
MIA...

SaltPork

::wrkime finds a hammer in the street, sees JoeyB walking out of the bar. Remembering the fin he gets for hitting JoeyB with a hammer in the pee-pee he takes a swing.....BAM!!! JoeyB is out for the count::

Oooohh, sorry about, guess that was a bad idea...hey do I still get my 5 bucks? JoeyB??

::wrkime shrugs, tosses hammer into the street and heads back into the bar::

__________________
It was like that when I got here....I swear.

SaltPork

Hey Bones, I see you're getting orally please by JoeyB's harem. Watch out for the brunette, she has some weird ass cold sore on her mouth.

__________________
It was like that when I got here....I swear.

stan the man

stan the man swagers into the bar steps up to the bar and orders a pink lady

__________________
long live the hud

stan the man

well done bones i havent heard that toon in so long and if a break is what you wnat i think ill give ya one

i think its time you lost jullia

__________________
long live the hud

SaltPork

JoeyB took 2 good shots with a hammer in the weenie and one glancing blow...he's okay by me.

__________________
It was like that when I got here....I swear.

KWSN

Lynyrd Skynyrd is playing? This intrigues KWSN. You had better have resurrected Ronnie Van Zant for this show, or KWSN would be disappointed.

william_wallace, if any sucka messes wit'choo, dice the bastard like a shallot.

KWSN can't seem to get rid of these narcotics, so he hands a Ziploc of crack to everyone in the bar.

__________________
Your arms are broken!

stan the man

yaa hoo smoke em if ya got em

__________________
long live the hud

stan the man

stan the man procalims "see ya folks im off to my crack whores to get some lovin" and runs at top speed to the door with a fat grin

__________________
long live the hud

JoeyB

*JoeyB crawls to the door, mustering enough strength, he pushes it open and looks in. He's still quite sore from the ball peen pounding earlier in the day.*

__________________
My mom is a Diamondbacks fan. She really likes the Big Unit

JoeyB

*JoeyB crawls across the same floor on which he was writhing in agony just minutes ago. Despite the chaos of others running past him, he reaches the bar*

__________________
My mom is a Diamondbacks fan. She really likes the Big Unit

stan the man

stan the man stubles back into the bar a mere 4 mins afterhe left to service his crack whores

"well now that was the finest presents ive recived in a few days

hey isnt that a giant sloth hanging from the chandelier"

__________________
long live the hud

JoeyB

*He finds the cash register and noticing that everyone is sufficiently distracted, he pounds the keys until it opens*

"100"

"200"

"300"

"400"

"500"

*after counting off the final bill, he gathers his strength enough to retrace his path and as quick as possible, leave the Inn*

__________________
My mom is a Diamondbacks fan. She really likes the Big Unit

stan the man

"yes it is i swear it is

it cant be the crack hey everone look up look way up"

__________________
long live the hud

JoeyB

*As he leaves, JoeyB looks back and to nobody in particular, mumbles*

"nothing personal....it's just business."

__________________
My mom is a Diamondbacks fan. She really likes the Big Unit

stan the man

oh ya fire my oh my ignore the sloth nothing to see here folks follow me

ill lead the way to the door

hey while we are all leaving ill take everone for a free ride on my whores

__________________
long live the hud

Somenosuke

__________________
Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. Yes is the answer.