The Haiku Game
 

Everyone knows that Haiku's are one of the easiest forms of Poetry (at least the type the everyday Joe writes). So what better way to celebrate this prose than with a nonsense game?

I'm sure all of you know that a Haiku is three lines, following the pattern of 5 syllables, then 7 and then 5 again.

Write a Haiku on the topic the previous person gives you, and then give a new topic for the next person to write about.


For example, if someone gave me the topic of "Dolphins" I could write

"Dolphins sure are cute
But they can be Vicious
Please don't eat my flesh."

I want the next Haiku to be about... Zombies!

Zombies are not fun
What do they do with the brains?
Eat zombies, eat brains

next topic: vehicular manslaughter

Look out! Move your ass!
Vehicular Manslaughter.
Oh Shit! Broken Glass!

Next Haiku: Siamese Twins

Siamese Twins YEA!
Stuck together by the hip.
Three legged race champs.

Next haiku: Puking in toilet reference

*edit, dang, bones posted at the same time I did, so i'll just do his too:

D-O-double-G.
Runnin with little bow-wow.
Illmatic flow yo.

I didn't know who I was supposed to have done so I did both at the same time.

snoop dogg and toilet
what did he digest last night?
oh, lots of hotdogs

This thread is dropping
I must swoop in and save it
Before it is gone

Next Hiaku: Charlie Manson!

Charlie's in jail now
Got folks to stab famous folks
What an asshole, huh?

Dammit Bones! Must be quicker next time.

Willie Wonka sucks
Turned me into a blueberry
"Candy Man" my ass

Next topic: the Six Million Dollar Man

Pretty boys who dance
But can they sing? Oh, HELL no!
Me? I'll take Buffett.

new topic: 1980s arcade games

Mario Brothers
Donkey Kong and MS. Pac Man
Favorites of all!

new topic:

elderly drivers

peer through steering wheel
what's the rush we've got all day
no respect, these kids.


Your new topic, should you choose to accept it: A lovely nighttime barbecue for two, with tasty kebabs, potatoes and a spot of skinny dipping to work up the various appetites.

Barbeque for two ?
Not at night, no not at night
Zombies rome at night.

next up... the toilet.

Awashed in vodka
I humble myself before
The Porcelain God

Next topic...

R. Kelly

Here, have some pee pee
It arouses me to see
Urine on this girl

Next Topic...

Fleas

kelly rapes lil kids
he is a child molestor
but his songs are mad

next: urination

Yes, urination.
But that does not mean
I stand to salute!

Next: the West Nile

Don't forget to add a topic for the next person, you silly people. Or I'll go and...I'll..go...and... I'll probaly just sit in the corner and cry

West Nile has Killed me
Up in Heaven there are bugs
Please don't bite me again

Next Topic: World War II

i killed adolf hitler
with a shot to his scrotum
i created world peace

next: anal

for some it is fun
for others it is painful
dirty dirty sex.

Next: robots

from tv's jetsons
i like rosie the robot
shes is really hot

next: britney spears

she is popular
but what is the real reason?
I say it's the tits

next up: cigarettes

Last one in the pack.
Fuckin' things cost too damn much.
Hey man, got a light?

next: tree frogs

-Mikey

tree frogs suck ass bad
i like to light them on fire
they burn really good

next: cell phones

Is it flight, greenback?
Or are you merely gliding?
Speak! We must be toad.

Up next: après-ski

Arse! Sorry, forget mine:)

Kobe plays B-Ball
And has a hot looking wife
Still total dumbass

Next: Anna Nichole Smith

Anna Nicole Smith
At one time considered hot
is certainly not

Next:
The Montreal Expos

Montreal Expos
Play for frogs but they won't come
Is Vlad a Yankee yet?


Next: Bill Gates

-Mikey

Hey rich ass, question:
"Spring time for green backs, you dig?"
That means "give me cash"

topic : creed

Christ-like pose works well
Albums sell and you tour world!
Music still sucks though.

Next: Hugh Hefner

hugh hefner is old
but his girls are much younger
because he's a pimp

next subject: bruce lee

"El oso polar
purpura" is Spanish for
Purple polar bear.

Next: Jar-Jar Binks

-Mikey

me sa jar jar binks,

troublesome ears me sa have


boss nass no like me




next topic wonder bras

Where are my tube socks?
Join in false advertising
like a Wonder Bra

Next Topic: Christy Canyon

DAMN YOU... disregard
this post and all of my posts
like you always do

next: something about your favorite sandwich

Hail Bones!

I understand. I am partial to the Italian Sausage, myself.
That is, of course, just between you and me.

Now, back to the Haiku...

the cheese, the bacon
bacon IS a condiment
don't forget ketchup

next: Your travels to a distant planet inhabited by giant silicon-based poodle dogs that shoot red beams out of their eyes.

Stupid poodles bite!
and shoot don't forget, damn dogs
Where are the space chicks?

Next Topic: James T. Kirk

What you talkin bout
Willis! Gary Coleman is
Gonna knock you out!

Next topic: Bran Muffins

"Which one Bones," I asked?
"The dead one or the one with
one leg? Huh, smart guy?"

Next Topic: Eminiem

eminem's talent
reliable source of light
light makes me vomit

next........sosa

got diarrhia?
take two immodium pills
it will stop you up.

what the shit, you didnt post a topic!@

I guess Ill post the next topic:

elephant poop

what is big and bad?
and I don't mean Roseanne Barr.
It's elephant poop!

next topic: global warming

back bending , I'm motionless
he falls from the ropes
and elbows my face

* Back to Jerry Springer *

next topic :404 error message

when surfing the net
i hate it when u get links
that dont fricken work

next: womens volleyball

lurking in the night
evil is its element
el chupacabra


Kobe in prison

K-dub out of sight
ever since the Kobe news
strange coincidence?


bicycles

A card in my spokes
Peddle fast for a cool noise
Look out! It's a truck!

Next: Jock itch

I am not playing
it is jock itch I'm scratching
That's what I tell them

Next: Self gratification

self gratifying?
oh baby, oh baby! hmm...
i'm still all alone.

next: verizon wireless

I just got a phone
Verizon wireless phone
It is sucking bad

The Haiku Game

five, seven, five more
that's easy, but funny's hard
wish bones would get here

next: happy hour

What time is it now?
Happy hour is coming
Hell I'm drinking now

Guinness

guinness is mean beer
dark and thick and tough to drink
just like my feces

topic : julia roberts

No doubt about it
She is a pretty woman
but a dingbat too

next topic:
Arnold as governor

Arnold as a gov
whhat is this world coming to
what next, Spunge BoB Pres?


Summertime (or for those of you on the other hemisphere, wintertime)

Lawn chair stuck to ass
Sweat pooling 'round my privates
God, when will it snow?

Next Topic: Bruce Campbell

Evil Dead bad hand
Keeping demons in cellar
B-movie galore

next topic: in-vitro fertilization

leggo my eggo
non-preggo. Get In-vitro
fertilization.

Next topic: Bambi vs. Car

She grazes peacefully.
Blind corner too fast; BAM! Shit...
My rates now go up.

Next: Rosie O'Donnell

-Mikey

She grazes peacefully.
on the buffets numerous.
Big,fat nasty bitch!



next topic Toe nails

ahhhhhhhhhhhhh dammit!!!!

too slow again eh?
elf is the brand new topic.
hope this one is fast



new topic toenails






great now i went and mis-spelled alf...... i really suck at this thread..... thanks for pointing that out BONES!!! hahaha

Had her boobs reduced.
Doesn't stop me; I still whack
Off to pics of her.

Next: smegma

-Mikey

Tampons are for girls
Don't mistake them for sweatbands
Look like a dumbass

Next topic: Saturday Night Fever

scary little men
they are really funny though
I laugh as I die


Next: drunken mistakes

Way too much to drink
Lead me to a place where I
Seemed to have no pants

Next up: Strip Clubs

monkeys are funny
oh wait, those are chimpanzees.
Helen Hunt is cool

Next: half-deaf staff at drive throughs

Yay we rule the school
Too bad that we've got no brains
welfare, here we come.

people who use internet slang in real life

take your order, guy?

all the happy meal toys are gone

no i won't date you


next: vertigo

what day is it?

Tom gets spitroasted
I have no clue what that means
but it sounds nasty

Next: women with fake boobs

brittney spears has boobs
I don't know if they are fake
but I will test them

topic: nine inch nails

once dated a girl
was hot and had nine inch nails
I still have the scars

Next: Guys that drive I-Rocs

Bitchin' Camaro
No it's not, in fact it sucks
Go home to your mom.

next, kung fu movies

jackie chan bruce lee
they dont even sound chinese
or is it just me


next, your home town

Gastonia sucks
Doesn't have a comic shop
I should open one

next, your favourite alcoholic beverage

Fizzy Liquid Gold
Sweet Condensation Clings On
King of Beers Lives On

Next fav film.

Scary rabbit mask
Time travel, Jake Gylenhaal
Donnie Darko owns.

Next, annoying cellphone rings

Hey Bones that was cack
As you say, you're often good...
must be an off day.


What's an IRC chat? Next!

1 \/\/1|| |-|4><0|2 j00
WTFOMFG
U wanna cyber!????!111//

Next: commies

my hand is so tired
think my other hand is gay
it won't help me out


next: reality TV

Everybody look!
I just put Bones' webcam up
On pirate TV

I should sell the rights
To some big network channel
what will it be called?

The name should be a
knockoff of a TV show
"Queer Eye for Himself?"

Next subject: bash.org

dying on the net?
no posts in over two weeks?
don't go there, myself

next: editing your own posts

you fucked up a post?
you can always edit it, k
you stupid jackass

next: Worlds worst Haiku

The big tiger goes
Grr rrr rrr rrr rrr rrr rrr
rrr rrr rrr rrr rrr

next: homsar

A tub off crisco
with a shiny hat on top
too much birthday cake.

Next (and I'll do this one myself) counting

one two three four five
one two three for five six- damn!
I can't say 'seven'

next: OJ simpson

J.C. played it well
It don't fit, you must acquit
Happy murderer.

next topic: The theory of relativity.

I tried to Research
Couldn't figure it all out
My head now hurts, thanks

next topic: psychedelic stuff

3 tasty mushrooms
the damn room is still spinning
woah the colors, man!



nest topic Baseball

God fucking dammt
Benitez blows one more save
God damn stupid Mets

next topic: New York Rangers

Which is worse? Rangers
Or Ranger fans? None of them
Know about hockey.


next topic: manifest destiny

Give me this land please
God told me I can have it
Please note my large gun.

Next: Clockwork Orange

I will wind and wind
let go the key to the works
fruit inanimate

Motor whirs, fruit does
nothing; stupid idea
juice will taste oily

Next: The Battle of Jutland

Von Sheer made a move
Jellicoe was a coward
Beatty did his job

German fleet a mess
never to pose a real threat
Jellicoe reprieved

England rules the seas
Though war drags on many years
writing on the wall


next: rodents as avatars

Every time I post
You will see this great big vole
and I think it's cool

next: what you would do for a klondike bar

Lady of the night
Equal opportunity
No, sorry, I'm lost.

Coming soon: Police speed traps


ps. Top three-pronged haiku Jutland summary, G.O.D. Bravo!

Hate technology
So I'll build my crazy bombs
out of string and wood.

noext: airline food

All three lines must rhyme?
I can do that all the time
With a twist of lime

next, 14 year old mall goths

Goths are dumb, whiney,
malajusted, rich kids
who block my mall path.

Most people fail to realise that my full name is Mr. Shakespeare Scorcex. That little fact, however, has no bearing on my crappy poetry.

Next:
Tape Measures

Help, my yellow friend!
I must make sure I'm precise.
Measure twice. Cut Once.

Next: The female orgasm.

oh oh oh yes yes
right there, oh my god oh damn
make me a sandwich

Next: breast self-exam