You're with your woman
You feel your stomach rumble
"Gross...it was the dog"

next topic:Marxism

Crumble, falling down
Ideals ended overnight,
Mugged in a meadow.

Next: Jagermeister

Gross, what is this shit?
Come on, man, take another.
wake up; "where am I?"

next topic: football place kickers

Sorry to butt in
Haikus are about two things
Please read haiku link:

http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Island/5022/

"Traditionally and ideally, a haiku presents a pair of contrasting images, one suggestive of time and place, the other a vivid but fleeting observation. Working together, they evoke mood and emotion. The poet does not comment on the connection but leaves the synthesis of the two images for the reader to perceive."

Thanks for butting in
back to football place kickers
some kick without shoes


Next: Wild Card Race

Know when to hold 'em
Gotta know when to fold 'em
Football really sucks.

next: dr. seuss

The Cat In The Hat,
Lorax; Horton Hears A Who?
Sorry you're gone, Ted.

Next: Frat parties

my image of time,
and place, my observation
vivid but fleeting


Not a good haiku
I thought I was funny, but
it was done before

Now to Dr. Suess-
psychedelic kids see Grinch,
talking cat; green eggs

next topic: books into movies

I was too slow there
warm beer and sweaty bodies
man, I miss college

next topic: books into movies

books into movies
Oh how they suck damn much
Shortened they must be.

:: Windex

pretty blue windex
lovely view from my window
streak free is the best


next: smog

It is hard to breath
there is a lot of smog out
I'm safe in my jeep


Next: idiots who don't have anti-virus software that kep on sending out emails in the names of everyone in their address book.

Fucking computer.
It is infecting alot,
of my e-mail pals.



next topic.... being the "wingman" at the club.

A lot is two words.

<b>Munku</b>, it does not matter, either way it is two sylables.

Flying near leader
Drop bombs and strafe dancing clubs
Oh, shit, killed by flak

Next topic: Travelling the world

Re: The Haiku Game
 

Isn't the middle line 6 sylables?

anyway:
Around and around
The world is a big place
I go everywhere

next: megaphone

Not if you pronounce it VISH-ee-us.
Don't forget, not everyone is from the Midwest and can talk normal. Some people are from places where they talk funny like down South, out East, out West, and up North. And then there's foreigners who do everything funny. :D

Megaphone, you make
A shitload of noise in church
and elevators

Next: Ducks

What a lucky duck
Flying faster than I shoot
I'll get you next year

Next: Rubber bands

Wee! This thing is fun
I pull it. What could go wrong?
OUCH. Mother Fucker.

Next: The "Popular" kids in High School

Actually, He got me there. I made a mistake on the example Hiaku. -blush-.

I'll go back and fix it... maybe.

the popular kids
now enjoy flipping burgers
as their full-time jobs

next: premature ejaculation

Oh girl, your so hot!
Let me see that hot pussy!
OH, OH OH!!!!! dammit!


next topic "taking your underwear to the dry cleaners!"

underwear sublime
mah scivvies be fancy pants
must dry clean only


Next: the truck stop

Corned beef hash and eggs,
It's 4 a.m. I'm so tired.
well, back on the road.


next topic
Twix cookie bars.

chocolate covered stuff
cookies with caramel on them
zit zit zit zit zit

Next: Listening to a police scanner as a hobby

code 27,
suspect on the scene, 10-4
send back up, roger!


next topic.... not letting this thread die.

Where did haiku's go?
Not quite as fun without them
Off to Titty Board.

Next: Mullets!

Hair style of the gods
Short in front, longer in back
Better than mohawk

Next: The late Warren Zevon

Never heard of this bloke
What'd he do that was so great
And how come he died?

next: Kyle's mum is a dirty jew

Cartman squints his eyes
Craps a star of David and thinks
Kyle's mum is a jew.


next: Sean Connery lusting after Maximum Strength Sudafed Sinus and Allergy Medicine

Scary pedophile
Old with too much ephedrine
Still thinks he's James Bond.

next: lung cancer

news story

Isrealis find gene
protects against lung cancer
affect lawsuits? No

next:
old jeans

Old jeans that I love
I wear you more than I should
So full of many holes

Next: Floppy disks

Look great and fit good
faded in all the right spots
too bad I gained weight.

Next Up: Your first time trying to get a bra off

dadgum it, can't get-
okay, there! -Aah lick suck squeeze
those aren't floppy disks!

next: hard drives

left, right, now back left.
down shift, push in the clutch. OH,
not that kind of drive.



next: honest mistakes.

sorry about that
you were on your knees and I
thought you were my wife

Next: Bar Fight!

Alcohol fueled
Slight blown out of proportion
Cops bust everyone

Next: Presidential Assasination

J.F.K. and Abe
Everyone talks about them!
Poor Grover Cleveland.

Next: Trying something new in bed

whip? check! baby oil ?
Check! Midget porn DVD?
check! Lets get it on!!!!!!



next: fishtanks

angelfish above
redtail shark swims beside
get me outta' here

forgot too add

auto maintenance

can't afford new car
with a warranty, but I
can't afford these bills

next:
Johnny Cash

Sang and wrote great songs,
Always dressed in fine black clothes,
Rest in peace, Johnny!


next topic : anything better then dying.

Not dying is good
Being tortured with pliers
It is not so good


Next, either: man's inhumanity to man
or: John Ritter

jack flash

he showed us his balls
but none saw that episode
may he rest in peace

next:
three's company

Come knock on our door,
we didn't answer? Sorry!
We are fucking now!




Next: Webcams

John Ritter just died
That was a funny sitcom
Now Mrs. Summers is mine!

next:
Homeless in Hollywood

the weather is great
second hand designer threads
life made in the shade


next: alphabet soup

babysitter came
no McDonalds for us, just
canned Chef Boyardee!

next:
haiku thread posts considered equivalent of stupid one word posts on Nonsense board for post count purposes

My wit is wasted,
Trying for my avatar.
Yes. NO. 3 to go!



next: topics so long they are almost impossible to make a haiku out of.

antidisestab-
lishmentarianism
can be defined as


Next: soft

flacid not turgid
please, why can't I get it up!
hoisting giant squid

roasted marshmellows;
wrapped in a down comforter
sometimes soft is good

next:
napkins

Tiny paper wipes
To make my dirty face nice
Or did you mean "those"?


next: tampons

Florid radiance
Imbibe as the earth; long parched,
yet dying to grow


next: Daredevil (the movie)

Why did I watch it?
I want to gouge out my eyes.
What a bad movie.

next: bottled water

why pay when it's free?
you know no diarrhea
should tell the RIAA!

next:
Napster clones

Begun, the clone war
has. Jango Fett or Napster
Use the force, Yoda!


next topic. human Clones

Ted Williams, Joan Jett
these are two I'd like to see cloned
Rush Limbaugh is not.

next topic: the socio and economic atroscities commited by the Bush administration towards one of the biggest minorites in the USA, transexual porn actors.

Ashcroft says: Shemales
must pay taxes, can't marry!
Don't let this thread die!

next: trophy wives

She's all mine. Big Tits.
She's not very smart. Nice ass.
The press is here, smile!!!!



next topic Hockey Games

faster, colder, and
more crunching than football, but
why three periods?

next:
figure skating

nancy kerrigan
was clubbed by tanya harding
thus a legend was born

next: Cute little furry kittens

my continental,
a '63, split fluffy in
two, my girlfriend barf'd

next: 10 hippies burning to death in a VW bus

V-W bus aflame
stinky hippies purified
Oh, how the ashes blow

edit: next topic, stir fry

chop up some veggies
in the pan with chicken too
stir fry like magic

next topic - drunk people

Flip me off asshole
For driving down the damn street
I'll run you over.

College kids suck dicks
Daddy's money and credit
I fucked your girlfriend.

next topic: fraternities

Frat boys hit their pledge,
with bad eggs and cold water.
The parties rule man!!!!!!!!!!!!!




next topic... forgetting to put a topic

I'm so excited
topic near and dear to me
write haiku, forget

next topic:
Gen. Wesley Clark

Never heard of him,
but what a horrible name.
WESLEY????? WTF???????????



next topic. the number 8

Sitting here thinking
about writing a haiku
on the number eight

ode to the haiku,
the last poster forgot to
give a new topic.


I guess that they were,
paying homage to my last
topic ,forgetting.



new topic.... people who take other peoples turns.

After you, and you.
No, I just like standing here.
Come back tomorrow?!

And next we have: chariot racing

Big Charlton Heston
races in a circle wishing
he had a Mossberg.

next topic: Michael Moore

Big sloppy fat guy
The Michigan Militia
goes to county fairs.

lax you great numptie
keep the kettle boiling
need haiku license

Have a go at: fishnet stockings

Nice and See thru, Do
I get Horny? NO. OPRAH.....
PUT SOMETHING ELSE ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




next topic : Book Clubs

Just joined the book club
We sat there and read our book
I hate the book club


Next topic: e-mail

You Got mail!!! alright!
sexy letter from the wife?
No, more fucking spam!



Next topic: PAYDAY!!!!!

80 hours this week
boss man dating my ex-girlfriend
where's my damn rifle?


next topic: your favorite lube

ky astroglide
in and out and in again
but your tongue beats all

next: halloween

Dress up real scary
Candy begging door to door
Razor in apple

next: obnoxious cats

Constantly meows
Always trying to get in
See if it can fly.

next: dirty diapers

possibly the worst,
most unpleasant chore there is
and piss in your eye

next:
Sunday School

Jesus, Jesus-Christ!
tough break on the cross; should have left
town with Mary M.


next topic: eating raw meat while reading Othelo

ii chikin
Othelo wa dare yo!
hara hetta

Did that one in authentic Japanese. Trust me, it's 5-7-5.

translation:

such yummy chicken
Who the hell is Othello?
I am so hungry.

Next topic: clipping the toenails

toe nails getting long
damn, can't see what I'm doing
gut gets in the way

Next topic: realizing that what you just ate may not be agreeing with you.

stomach is churning,
soon your asshole is burning,
Damn you, Taco bell!!!!!!!!!!



next topic: the sun

Big yellow sky ball
You rule the day and give me
lethal skin cancer

Next topic: tires

round and round they go
if tread less than lincoln's head,
time to get new ones

next: alligator clips

hardware store supply
snickers chuckles and big grins
yeah got wires to clip

next: puffy

P. Diddy has stayed
on the scene after J.Lo;
ghostbusters' "Sta-Puff"

http://www.drizzle.com/~earlb/costum...s/86stayst.jpg

next: halloween costumes

A ghost, A Witch, A
princess. Dracula and the
Wolfman, want candy!



next topic: your job

10-key, entry is
making my hand and my arm ache
trigger finger's good.


next topic: Diet Mt. Dew versus Water

Diet Dew? Water?
It is all pee in the end.
Drink and be merry.

Next: Everyone is looking at you funny, and are slowly backing away to the opposite end of the subway car ... something is not right, but you don't know what...

A big old booger
hanging green out of my nose
take it and eat it

oops. I forgot to suggest a follow up.

next topic: driving drunk

What is that red light?????
why is it following me?????
should I pull over?????



next topic : A night In the drunk tank.