Written by me.. school bathroom.. after taking a dump and seeing a light going out..

"Its not that the lightbulb emits light.. it sucks all the darkness away.. thats why when a bulb burns out its black"

Ill be damned if the band teacher didnt figure it was me in a heart beat..

others ive seen..

If wishes were fishes the world would be an ocean..

under that

yeah and if stupes were rich you would be bill gates.. get over it hippy

"peace though superior firepower"
"He's dead, Jim. You get his tricorder, Ill get his wallet"
"Beam me up scotty this place sucks"

In a hospital bathroom.. was written

"sperm and urine doners wanted.. leave samples"

Here I sit, on the pooper
Giving birth to an Ohio State Trooper.

(a rest stop somewhere in Ohio)

Don't forget about...


Here is sit cheecks a-flexan
unnnnnnnhhhhhhhhgggggg
out pops another Texan!!!!!

at the feast of ego
everyone leaves hungry

bentley's house of coffee and tea
tuscon, az

Here i come to sit and think
but all i can do is shit and stink
I wonder what i ate today
That made my bowels burn away

Those who write on shithouse walls should roll their shit in little balls.
Those who read these words of wit should eat those little balls of shit.

You can shake, you can squeeze
you can jump, you can dance
The last drop won't come out
'till you pull up your pants

I saw this on the walls of a internet cafe...hackers with a lot of time on their hands...

01100110 01110101 01100011 01101011

To decode, go to http://nickciske.com/tools/binary.php. take out the spaces first.

In a port-o-potty:

"Welcome to the mexican space shuttle"

I about died laughing.

it's hard to make a comeback
when you haven't been anywhere...

written in the dust
on the back of a bus
wickenburg, az

Bathroom wall banter...
 

Some of the writing on bathroom walls, especially in bars, cracks me up.... please write some of the funnier ones you've seen.


-I fucked your momma !
Shut up Dad, you're drunk again...




or another one (from a bar in San Francisco)...

-Here I sit cheeks still flexin',
Just gave birth to another Texan !

My favourite is toilet tennis in the stalls. On the right stall wall it says "Toilet Tennis, look left." On the left stall wall it says "Toilet Tennis, look right." Keeps me entertained if I'm drunk.

There was a club in NY that had the classic "Employees much wash hands before leaving restroom", with the handwritten annotation, "I waited here for hours, and no employee came to wash my hands!"

To tired to work,
to poor to quit,
so here i sit,
Pretending to take a big-ol-shit!

Thank you, thank you. i will be here all week!


no just kidding (i work construction) there are alot of good ones in the porta-shiters on construction sites!

Right above a pisser:
"The Future of our Country in is Your Hands"

One of my all time favs....

Some come here to sit and think....
Some come here to shit and stink....
I come here to scratch my balls and read the bullshit on the walls.

Or

Here I sit in silent bliss, thinking bout this tinkling piss.
Now and then a splash is heard, followed by a tumbling turd.

"please don't flush toothpicks......the crabs around here can pole vault!"

-e. lansing, circa 1985

I'll always remember the first time I saw it, on a condom dispenser at a rest stop on I-80:

"This gum tastes like shit, but it's great for blowing bubbles!"

-Mikey

Saw this one at a bar one time:

"So, I hear this is where all the dicks hang out."

I saw one in a rest stop that made me laugh sooooo hard.... But it really makes no sence. It said........... " Big Ed eats your leftovers!"

I still think thats funny to this day!!!

oh lets not forget this one...



I bold letters "I FUCKED YOUR MAMA!!!"
below in in neat writing... " Go home dad, your drunk!"

we didn't forget it.
First one!

the classic..

Here I sit, broken hearted
Tried to shit but only farted.

bobw: paid a dime, damnit!!!

Here I sit, broken hearted,
paid a dime, only farted.

People who write on bathroom walls,
Roll their shit in little balls.
People who read these words of wit
eat those little balls of shit.

Funny one I read when I was but a wee lad.

Make love, not war
-hell, do both-
GET MARRIED

Women's Restroom
The Filling Station
Bozeman, MT

"They made me do it!"-Some wall in Brixton...

"Grafitti here"-'That toilet' in clapham...

"Fuck Tony Blair"-Red Brick wall, round my ends...

-no matter how much you wiggle,
no matter how much you dance,
that last little drop
will always fall on your pants!

-you smack it, slap it,
or bang it against the wall
but until you put it in your pants
that last drop wont fall

-we aim to please, you aim too, please

If voting could really change things,
it would be illegal...

Revolution Books
New York, New York

on an outhouse at work.......(nasty fuckin' place i might add.)

jesus didn't play hockey cuz he was sick of gettin' nailed to the boards.

*i know.....i know......straight to hell*

(drawn on the door of the stall is a nice big arrow pointing down)

the words under the arrow read "if you are reading this you are now shitting at a 45* angle."

A Woman's Rule of Thumb:
If it has tires or testicles,
you're going to have trouble with it.

Women's Restroom
Dick's Last Resort, Dallas, TX

Restroom Grafitti
 

Post Your favorite bathroom Grafitti.
I'll Start ya off

Those who write on bathroom walls,
roll their shit into little balls,
those who read these words of wit,
eat those little balls of shit.

The classic:
Here I sit, broken hearted
paid my dime and only farted.
Later on I took a chance,
tried to fart and shit my pants!

In a toilet stall at my school, above the toilet paper dispenser: "CCSF degrees, please take one" ;)

I think that one is pretty funny fernweh. ;)

Same here, except the CCSF bit is different. Generally they say "Arts degrees, take one".

Yup, seen that one Latch (makes me glad I never went back to that deferred BA!)

I like this one...

"I used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead."

This isn't exactly written graffiti, but close...
Once I saw a picture of Osama Bin Laden taped to the back of a urinal for people to piss on. It was awesome.