jlanez

But there was a shroud of confusion and controversy surrounding the AAA. Another organization of radical social activists had co-opted the AAA brand when they came out with "An enema of Anemones Anonymous." Apparently, some twisted but adventurous sea being had discovered the cleansing effects of irrigating with solubilized anemones. Butt once the practice became widespread, the public outcry was deafening. Legal battles ensued and if it hadn't been for Al Gore's Power Point Presentation the movement might have never crystallized.

Anyway, Starbucks was immediately rapt by the beautiful creatures. She was so taken in that she found that she was able to communicate with them. Under their spell, she fell into a hazy reality while the anemones described with vivid detail, how the mer-man had been conquered and forced into subjectivity.

sitardude2000

Any anemone could tell the story. But it was Annie Emma Neely the anemic anemone that anted up first.

"It was Mrs. Paul. Lesbian bitch fishmonger! She hates males of all species and one merman was equal to about 4367 fish sticks."

jlanez

Starbucks was horrified. All of her life she had believed that fish sticks were made of cod or haddock or shark, or some other fish that nobody really cared about. But to think that a beautiful mer-creature could be harvested, partitioned, battered, and deep-fried to make a convenient snack sickened her even more than the thought of her ten thousandth Grande Cafe Latte, of the sight of Aqua-Trump's pubic comb-over flapping in the sea current, or her memory of the day she was ripped from her idyllic ocean paradise to become a playtoy of Madison Avenue.

Starbucks heaved and blew chunks of pomegranate fig newtons from her mouth and from her gills. When she recovered herself, she arose with a single determination - to seek and exact revenge from Mrs. Paul. But first she had to establish a clandestine eco-terrorist organization with enough money, members, and lawyers to take down the fishicidal maniac, as well as all fish-haters, wherever they might live.

sitardude2000

She thought about PETA but they were too wimpy. So she started her own organization...Mermaids for the Ethical Altruistic Treatment of Oceanic life...MEAT-O...

ottopilot

Steve, the town boob, thought up the slogan "Join MEAT-O and be NEAT-O".

... well, he IS the town boob.

__________________
"It rubs the lotion on Buffy, Jodi and Mr. French's skin" - Uncle Bill from Buffalo

sitardude2000

Mrs. Paul started the slogan "BEAT MEAT-O" but it sort of backfired on her...

ottopilot

Suddenly, there was an explosion at the tartar sauce factory ...

__________________
"It rubs the lotion on Buffy, Jodi and Mr. French's skin" - Uncle Bill from Buffalo

sitardude2000

Mrs. Paul was unnerved by news of the explosion and would have to swallow her pride and call Gorton. They had been lovers until Gorton, who used to be a woman, changed his sex...

jlanez

Mrs. Paul and Gorton immediately realized that they were in over their heads. The Mer-Resistance was too strong and too well organized. They needed help. They needed someone who could get traction in a deep bog, someone who could make possible the impossible. They needed Karl Rove.

sitardude2000

While waiting on Karl's response they turned to fighting fire with fire. Using underwater stealth technology they were able to go submarine with ichthy-seeking missles. The weapons were "clean" and served two porpoises, I mean purposes....Kill the resistance, one fish at a time, and do so preserving their bodies for profit in the fish meat plant...

sitardude2000

It was time for a distraction from the attention being given the "Starfish Wars" as they were being called. Some possibilities were current events...pretty boring currently...or that old standby...some sort of mention of "poopie"....After all, the story unfolding was quickly turning into poop...

sitardude2000

News came slowly to Oceania. Starbuck frowned in befuddlement at the news. Georgia had attacked Russia. That was strange enough. Then the rumors flooded in. South Carolina, not to be outdone by a bunch of crackers, had invaded China! What did Tennessee? The same thing Arkansas. RED! Communism had enjoyed a respite from the world stage's focus, so "The South" decided it was time to stir things up and start killing Commies again...

sitardude2000

But all this news took a backseat to the events unfolding in Minnesota. Sarah Palin was making her speech and Cindy McCain just walked up on stage in the middle of it. Sarah was surprised but just looked at Cindy as she walked onstage. Cindy took her own hair down, then Sarah's and proceeded to put her arms around Sarah and began kissing her. First with many tender kisses on the lips but then a passionate deep kiss. Sarah put her arms around Cindy and kissed her passionately also. The Republicans went crazy with cheering. The Democrats didn't have a chance now, as Michelle Obama was already third in hotness to Cind and Sar. And nobody could think of what Joe Biden's wife looked like.

jewels

But they decided to work it out and took the limo together to the White House.

After Laura took them to see GW ...

__________________
We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess.
Mark Twain