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Old 02-12-2008, 08:27 AM   #1 (permalink)
Eponymous
 
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Location: Central Central Florida
The Complaint Department

I hereby appoint this thread the capability of logging all complaints, both real and imagined.

Posting the complaint will nullify the existence of said complaint, so once you've complained, it's all good.


Here's my beginning contribution:

Work is slow today for some odd reason.

I'm bored shitless.

I'm horny (lots of men around but no one I want, waaaa)

I'm broke.

I'm hungry and it's not lunchtime.
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Old 02-12-2008, 09:19 AM   #2 (permalink)
Darth Papa
 
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Location: Yonder
My neck hurts.

I didn't sleep well last night.
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Old 02-12-2008, 09:30 AM   #3 (permalink)
Riding the Ocean Spray
 
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Location: S.E. PA in U Sofa
TO THE TFP COMPLAINT DEPARTMENT
I hereby submit my complaint: people just complain too much about minor relatively insignificant things. Look around the world and be grateful for what you have. Look at the bright side of life. Not to say things can't improve, but don't dwell on the negative minor crap while you're working on improvements.

Unlike jewels, I'm busy as hell in work today; actually that's as usual ...mainly because most people here don't know what the f**k they're doing so unless it's blatantly stupid obvious, I have to make the decisions and figure it out. Well, at least they pay me for it.

I just ordered a tuna grinder for lunch ...a fine Italian roll made at the little sandwich shop, with only albacore white tuna, Hellmans mayo, provolone, tomato, lettuce, raw onion ...then toasted lightly in their pizza oven. Damn, this sambo is so good I can see how it can make you horny.
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Old 02-12-2008, 09:35 AM   #4 (permalink)
Fly
see the links to my music?
 
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Location: Beautiful British Columbia
i didn't sleep at all last night........fuckin' mixing/mastering my tunes all night.......i'm damn tired.



oh yeah.......and joe keeps fucking bugging me......
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Old 02-12-2008, 11:01 AM   #5 (permalink)
 
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Location: ❤
people have complained
that I don't complain enough;
bye bye nullify.
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Old 02-12-2008, 11:27 AM   #6 (permalink)
Minion of Joss
 
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Location: The Windy City
I'm f'ing sick of writing my final papers.
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Dull sublunary lovers love,
Whose soul is sense, cannot admit
Absence, because it doth remove
That thing which elemented it.

(From "A Valediction: Forbidding Mourning" by John Donne)
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Old 02-12-2008, 11:32 AM   #7 (permalink)
Junkie
 
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Location: Greater Boston area
I complain, therefore I am.
Complaining is part of the job here. I could probably fill the server with the litany I've heard the past few days. I could put a small dent in it just by myself. I won't bore you with all of them, but if any good ones come up, I'll let you know.
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Old 02-12-2008, 12:26 PM   #8 (permalink)
comfortably numb...
 
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Location: upstate
'ckin' whiners...
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"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.
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Old 02-13-2008, 05:31 AM   #9 (permalink)
Upright
 
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Location: Here. No, not there... here.
I wish to complain about a 'winning' lottery ticket I bought just recently. I actually wanted the first division but imagine my surprise when it turns out I only had four numbers and barely got my money back. I believe this to be due to no fault of my own and demand an immediate upgrade. I'm not totally unreasonable and am quite happy to wait a short while for my millions to be transferred to my account. Please be sure to rectify whatever faulty sales device/technique has occurred to bring about this obvious mistake.
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Old 02-13-2008, 05:33 AM   #10 (permalink)
Eponymous
 
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Location: Central Central Florida
It's raining and nasty outside.

Bummer.

I wanna go play in a puddle and I can't.
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Old 02-13-2008, 05:34 AM   #11 (permalink)
Fly
see the links to my music?
 
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Location: Beautiful British Columbia
i miss Nancy.............
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Old 02-13-2008, 05:43 AM   #12 (permalink)
through charlatans phone
 
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Location: Northcoast
I'm still upset that Skittle Bowl isn't an olympic event......
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Old 02-13-2008, 06:23 AM   #13 (permalink)
Devoted
 
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Donor
Location: New England
Quote:
Originally Posted by jewels443
It's raining and nasty outside.

Bummer.

I wanna go play in a puddle and I can't.
It snowed last night, and now its downpouring rain, so all the roads are flooded. Nasty nasty nasty.
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Old 02-13-2008, 07:16 AM   #14 (permalink)
Riding the Ocean Spray
 
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Location: S.E. PA in U Sofa
I'm complaining about the same nasty weather here!!! And on top of that, my one boy decides this morning he will meet his buddy at the local Borders ...which won't even be open for a couple hours... and they will walk to school together in this cold downpour, not to mention the delayed school opening, so I'm sure he'll be sitting in school all day dripping wet. Ahhh, no you are not doing that I told him but I got nothing but a lot of complaints on that ...reminded me of this thread and you guys.
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Old 02-13-2008, 04:31 PM   #15 (permalink)
Getting it.
 
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Location: Lion City
My morning coffee is crap.
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Old 02-13-2008, 05:50 PM   #16 (permalink)
Fly
see the links to my music?
 
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Location: Beautiful British Columbia
my kids are really pissin' me off right now.
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Old 02-13-2008, 06:58 PM   #17 (permalink)
still, wondering.
 
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Location: South Minneapolis, somewhere near the gorgeous gorge
Ain't got none,
but haven't any.
Life is good.
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Old 02-14-2008, 04:30 AM   #18 (permalink)
Eponymous
 
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Location: Central Central Florida
It's absolutely gorgeous outside. I'm complaining 'cause I can't share it with those of you with less perfect weather today.
__________________
We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess.
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Old 02-14-2008, 04:40 AM   #19 (permalink)
comfortably numb...
 
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Super Moderator
Location: upstate
'ckin' cold over on this side of the peninsula...
__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.
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Old 02-14-2008, 04:49 AM   #20 (permalink)
Eponymous
 
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Location: Central Central Florida
Same here, but it's sunny and it feels GOOD! 59 right now I think, how's by you?
__________________
We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess.
Mark Twain
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Old 02-14-2008, 04:58 AM   #21 (permalink)
comfortably numb...
 
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Super Moderator
Location: upstate
44...
__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.
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Old 02-14-2008, 05:05 AM   #22 (permalink)
Eponymous
 
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Location: Central Central Florida
Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! That IS cold. :shudders: Come on down, that 15 degrees makes a diff, ya know.
__________________
We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess.
Mark Twain
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Old 02-14-2008, 06:53 AM   #23 (permalink)
Riding the Ocean Spray
 
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Location: S.E. PA in U Sofa
Formal Complaint
I bought a bunch of chocolate covered macadamia nuts last night and they're already all gone.
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Old 02-15-2008, 03:40 AM   #24 (permalink)
has a plan
 
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Location: middle of Whywouldanyonebethere
Hey world!
Westboro Baptist Church and all other Religious Fundamentalists/Extremists
Nationaldemokratische Partei Deutschlands
NIU Shootings and all similar school shootings
Assud the Hamas Bunny
Scientologists
Time for all of us to shove off this mortal coil and let some other species rise up and take our place. There is no place in the universe for us like this.
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Old 02-15-2008, 02:19 PM   #25 (permalink)
comfortably numb...
 
uncle phil's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: upstate
four legs good;
two legs bad...
__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.
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Old 02-15-2008, 02:38 PM   #26 (permalink)
 
ring's Avatar
 
Location: ❤
A three legged race.....?

Uhhh..
I have no complaints to report at this time...
I'm outta here...
See ya...

Last edited by ring; 02-15-2008 at 03:57 PM.. Reason: Toned it down a tad.
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Old 02-29-2008, 08:34 PM   #27 (permalink)
Minion of the scaléd ones
 
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Location: Northeast Jesusland
My complaint is that I can't muster a good complaint right now. Oh, except that the bridge of my nose has a painful by not particularly visible zit on it that's driving me BUGFUCK!
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Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
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Old 03-01-2008, 04:38 AM   #28 (permalink)
Eponymous
 
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Location: Central Central Florida
I can't find anyone around here who'll make me breakfast.
__________________
We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess.
Mark Twain
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Old 03-01-2008, 07:36 AM   #29 (permalink)
Fly
see the links to my music?
 
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Location: Beautiful British Columbia
i'm looking at this huge pothole in my driveway....i should fix it.


there goes doin' sweet FA today......
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Old 03-01-2008, 08:33 AM   #30 (permalink)
Minion of the scaléd ones
 
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Location: Northeast Jesusland
There is a giant pile of size 26 clothes that my size 6 wife has shrunken out of bagged in my garage in front of the tools I need to make the platform to level the 110 gallon fish tank to hold the bushfish that have been living in a 25 gallon tank while I wait for her to take care of that pile of goddamn clothes. Grrrr.

And the strippers aren't here yet either.
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Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
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Old 03-01-2008, 04:21 PM   #31 (permalink)
Une petite chou
 
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Location: With All Your Base
my neck hurts.
and the cats are keeping me awake.
along with the man who rolls over and says, "would you please manage whatever is on your side table so that i can get an hour of uninterrupted sleep."
yes, dear.
no matter that i've been up since two a.m. fighting with your kitten who enjoys chewing on used q-tips and drinking out of the toilet.
i hate being tired and cranky.

okay, i'm done. thanks.
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Quote:
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Old 03-01-2008, 05:20 PM   #32 (permalink)
comfortably numb...
 
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Super Moderator
Location: upstate
my head hurts...
my feet stink...
and i don't love jesus...
__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.
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Old 03-01-2008, 06:20 PM   #33 (permalink)
Minion of the scaléd ones
 
Tophat665's Avatar
 
Location: Northeast Jesusland
I'd like to complain about the quality of these complaints. They lack a certain non sequitor quality fundamental to this forum.

And my coffee doesn't taste the way it should.
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Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
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Old 03-01-2008, 08:33 PM   #34 (permalink)
Fly
see the links to my music?
 
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Location: Beautiful British Columbia
i'm actually quite pissed off that joe hasn't been around to kick my sorry ass lately..........


the bastard.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tophat665

And my coffee doesn't taste the way it should.

Top dude.............liquor man...........


no really.



and i have none myself............fuck.
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Last edited by Fly; 03-01-2008 at 08:34 PM.. Reason: Automerged Doublepost
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Old 03-01-2008, 08:54 PM   #35 (permalink)
Riding the Ocean Spray
 
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Location: S.E. PA in U Sofa
Complaint: loosing my mind
Fly man, don't hold this against me, I don't know what got into me! I went out to dinner at one of my favorite local places, Khajuraho Indian Restaurant, since it's byob I took some beers to drink with dinner and ended up drinking tea, and taking the beers home ...wtf?
Complaint #2: too many good foods, I could only sample a couple
I had Mulligatawny soup, a traditional soup made with lentils and subtly flavored with delicate herbs; for my main course I had lamb Biryani which is Indian basmati rice cooked with layers of lamb, onion, fresh ginger and exotic delicate spices; to go with it, an order of onion Kulcha, which is scrumptious unleavened bread stuffed with onions

...still time for redemption, I'll drink the beers now that I'm home
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Old 03-02-2008, 06:25 AM   #36 (permalink)
through charlatans phone
 
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Location: Northcoast
Quote:
Originally Posted by BadNick
Complaint: loosing my mind
Fly man, don't hold this against me, I don't know what got into me! I went out to dinner at one of my favorite local places, Khajuraho Indian Restaurant, since it's byob I took some beers to drink with dinner and ended up drinking tea, and taking the beers home ...wtf?
Why would he hold this against you? He drinks tea everywhere he goes. Oh, heheh, wait......that's Coors Lite!

sorry, carry on.....
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Old 03-02-2008, 08:11 AM   #37 (permalink)
Fly
see the links to my music?
 
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Location: Beautiful British Columbia
bite me joe..........
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Old 03-02-2008, 08:52 AM   #38 (permalink)
through charlatans phone
 
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Location: Northcoast
no can do...

not a big fan of canadian bacon........
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Old 03-04-2008, 05:05 PM   #39 (permalink)
Minion of the scaléd ones
 
Tophat665's Avatar
 
Location: Northeast Jesusland
Man, there are so many places I want to go, but , thanks to the the airline industry leveraging their economic power to create a situation at airports where there are fewer takeoff and landing slots and loading than planes scheduled to fill them, a paranoid and frankly cowardly response to an overestimated threat on the part of a government hungry for more power by any means necessary, the sort of bluenose busybodyism that lead to the WCTU in a excessively vocal minority voting bloc, and a shortsigted energy policy seemingly based on finding the places in the world with the least stable cultures and governments and mining for things to burn there, it is more trouble and expense than it's worth.

Fuck them all. They can suck a fart out of my ass, each and every one of them - the airlines, the government, the busybodies, the energy companies, the Texans, Arabs, Persians, Nigerians, Russians, Kazhaks, Afghans, Floridians, Canadians, Venezuelans, Mexicans, and Religious fundamentalists of all stripes. I'll make sure to eat bean burritos and tuna omelettes for a week just to have appropriately pungent anal vapors for their sniffing pleasure.
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Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
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Old 03-04-2008, 05:32 PM   #40 (permalink)
Eponymous
 
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Location: Central Central Florida
The literal cost of this so-called oil crisis is killing me, namely gasoline which has been going up about two cents per day since that dime-in-one-day increase about three weeks ago and food, including eggs, fruit and milk. Soon I won't be able to afford to drive anywhere but to work and back and won't be able to buy milk or eggs if they keep going up at this rate.

Rant over. For now.
__________________
We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess.
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