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Bernadette carries our love child in a grease-stained paper bag.
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GH fried his kitty one Sunday morning while trying to duplicate Ben Franklin's kite/lightning experiment.
Instead of a key, he used el gatito. tsk-tsk |
yeah, and fre was right there waking him up, on his way to church...
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The last time phil approached a church he heard a voice from above that said, "And ye shall sink a hole in one..."
He left right away for his nearest links, eager to do the Lord's work. Turns out, it was his buddy, a Scottish church-sign letterer, talking to himself. :p |
Fremen buys candy cigarettes and pretends to smoke.
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johnny pyro is scared to light a match.
the sulphur bothers his nostrils |
fly sleeps with a Raggedy Ann doll gone Goth.
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Fremen likes to go into tall buildings just before lunch time, call each elevator in turn, break wind in it, and step out and send it to the top floor.
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Quote:
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Top likes to hang out in the subway wearing his Armani suit and his Italian shoes and ask strangers to lend him trainfare.
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SirLance has a penchant for fresh boogers... only not his own. That would be gross.
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charlie...i'm at a loss for freakin' words...just, just...charlie...
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Uncle Phil likes to hear the horror over and over again. No sense to it.
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kramus likes to put a banana in his pocket and tease the monkeys in his local zoo with the line, "I've got a banana in my pocket, and I'm not afraid to use it!"
(Or some such line.) |
Fre here likes to bathe in ketchup.........
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And all the while fly dips in his fries.....
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And Paddyjoe films it and puts it on his website, "Ketchupfetish.com"
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And J. Pyro buys a full year's subscription to it, all the while keeping his monkey poo fetish site going full jungle-boogie tilt. ;)
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Funded by Fre's subscription to J's monkey poo fetish site, which he funds by tap dancing in the street outside of baseball games.
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SirLance has a deep, abiding fear of bobblehead dolls.
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Poppinjay enjoys long walks in the park, margueritas and touching himself when noone is looking.
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charley likes pina coladas...
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...and getting caught in the rain. Why do they always foget I like getting caught in the rain?
Uncle Phil, late at night, likes to go outside and stare at the moon while mumbling, "I am a fairy princess, I *am* a fairy princess..." Oddly his wife loves this about him. |
Charlatan's greatest secret is that he is exactly what he appears to be.....
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tophat changed his names spelling from the Indian one bequethed him in great ceremony on the plains of the Dakotas. Once known as Too Fat, he felt a more dapper image should be presented.
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Kramus is in actuality an agent for the Argentinian govenment, posing as a Canadian citizen to infiltrate the United States underground trade of marshmallow fluff treats. Thus far he has been unsuccessful, but has managed to get the recipe for fruit rollups.
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Tecoyah likes to watch movies of dogs catching frisbees. He does this by the hour. Oddly enough, he has never touched a frisbee himself.
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kramus once sought the source of the Nile in Bisbee, Arizona. (nice try, guy)
He'll find it one of these days, though. |
Freman lost the bid on Enron's giant E.
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right, and poppinjay won it...
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Uncle Phil grows cultures taken from swabs from rental bowling shoes. He thinks he will create the ultimate cheese with them.
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Kramus smuggles cheese from Wisconsin into South America, which he sells to rebels and uses the proceeds to support his belly button lint collection.
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SirLance is a major stockholder in Kramus' belly button lint collection. Obviously, he is a shameless promoter.
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Elphaba has twice been reprimanded for only using 6 veils in her notorious dance routine - not to mention the citations for excessive fan failure in her encores.
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It was a malfunction dammit
Kramus steals veils from innocent women who accidently find themselves dancing in sleezy bars. |
Elphaba was in line to replace Lori Laughlin as John Stamos' love interest in Full House but her refusal to remove her oversized-brim hat led to the cancellation of the show.
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JumpinJesus enjoys spending his evenings standing in his 13th floor window waving to all his friends... Sadly, "all his friends" are sea gulls, pigeons and taxi cabs and none of them ever wave back. This doesn't deter him in the slightest.
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Charlatan, or Chuckles in certain circles, likes to hire out for kid's birthday parties using his alter ego.
Chuckles proceeds to 'roast' the birthday kid to the amusement of the other little midgets, then on his break, he makes his 'move' on the closest parent. |
Fremen once ran away to join the Circus but was turned away because of a little-known and rarely-used unspoken circus superstition: never accept into your big top a man who comes to you asking if elephants like peanuts and if there is someone guarding the elephants or if they are all alone.
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JJ is allergic to peanuts............
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