icy_ca

This is the best place I could think of for this, so the mods may change location at they're discretion. But I think anything from the weekly world new is nonsense. Oh I got there via FARK.


PASADENA, Calif. -- A NASA space probe has reportedly discovered a huge mother lode of oil on the moon -- and the astounding find could usher in a new era of peace and prosperity for America!

Scientific data recorded by NASA's unmanned Lunar Prospector spacecraft indicates there are at least 270 trillion barrels worth of "black gold" buried beneath a crater in the lunar south pole -- more than 1,000 times the known oil reserves of Saudi Arabia and enough to meet America's energy needs for more than 100 years to come, a scientist says.

Notoriously secretive NASA officials are still sitting on the mind-blowing March 8 discovery, based on new computer analysis of data beamed back in 1998. But respected astronomer Dr. Gary Wiltts, who has close ties to the U.S. space agency, received a heads up from one of his associates.

"I was told the discovery of oil in the Aitken Basin of the moon's south pole was made with Prospector's neutron spectrometer," he reveals.

"Naturally, this means NASA will hastily renew manned missions to the moon, which had been written off as a useless, 'dead' hulk for decades. For starters, expect to see the planned launch date of the next probe, Lunar A, moved forward from Jan. 1, 2004."

Striking oil on the moon means soon the U.S. may no longer be dependent on foreign oil -- and future wars in the Middle East can be avoided.

"In a short time, the Mideast will no longer be of any real strategic importance to the United States -- we won't have to put our servicemen and women in harm's way every time some tinhorn dictator in the region acts up," notes Pasadena-based Dr. Wiltts.

"In the past, whenever we had a conflict with Iraq, we had to worry about harming their oil supply. That's no longer an issue. Now we can just nuke them back to the Stone Age."

With a massive influx of lunar oil flooding the market, gas prices will plummet to just pennies a gallon.

"Virtually free energy will transform our economy," predicts Dr. Wiltts.

NASA is keeping a lid on the breakthrough, hoping that, through secrecy, U.S. drillers can get rigs set up on the moon well before other oil-hungry countries.

Meanwhile, the agency is quietly conducting a feasibility study on how to recover the oil cost-effectively, the astronomer reveals.

"We have to build a fleet of space tankers that can get to the moon and back -- a round-trip journey of 454,126 miles at a minimum -- without burning more fuel than they transport," he explains.

"The good news is we really have a jump on the rest of the world. America has already planted her flag on the moon -- we've already 'laid our claim.'

"Also, low lunar gravity should make the process of extracting oil easier."

The discovery is also intriguing from a purely scientific standpoint, because of its implications about life on the moon, the astronomer adds.

"Petroleum on Earth comes from organisms such as marine algae, plankton and dinosaurs that died millions of years ago and decayed over the eons," explains Dr. Wiltts. "If there's oil on moon, the only way it could have gotten there is if similar life forms once existed there."

Reese

I don't believe this. Even if there is oil on the moon, it would cost way too much fuel to get it from the moon to the earth. However they could use create oil wells, and refineries, and the moon could become a huge gas station... then they wouldn't have to keep launching shuttles to refuel other ones...

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Unknown Poster

I believe EVERYTHING I read in the "Weekly World News"


http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/news/...stanceid=58165

Midlandmadman

I'd say this was B.S!

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BoCo

Of course this is nonesense, but let's pretend it's real. I have a pretty good question for you....

What if the transport vehicles break up on re-entry?!?

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denim

You get a one-barrel oil spill. NASA can't build a cargo carrier to save its life. What they can do, these days, is generate paperwork.

Peetster

This would imply a pretty huge organic species lived and died there long ago, wouldn't it? ;-)

icy_ca

There is the idea that the moon is a piece of the earth that was removed by some explosion several billion years ago. That was also prior to the Pangea theory's general acceptance.
If the moon were earth material removed, that may explain where most of the dinosaurs went ;-)
Maybe we can send Bruce Willis and his loveable but gruff driller buddies to investigate!

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more is said than done.

denim

Nah, send Bruce Willis' co-actor, so he can see dead dinos.

"Reunite Gondwanaland!!!"

BBtB

Well I would think all the oil would burn up before it got to earth. In other words... The best damn fireworks you ever seen!

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Meridae'n once played "death" at a game of chess that lasted for over two years. He finally beat death in a best 34 out of 67 match. At that time he could ask for any one thing and he could wish for the hope of all mankind... he looked death right in the eye and said ...

"I would like about three fiddy"

Ashton

CSflim

I don't get it...it's obviously not true, any one who believes it must be pretty erm...lets not get into that...

but its not exactly satire either? I mean, its not funny or clever in any way. So what is it?

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CSflim

ah! pardon my ignorance, should have read the rest of the replies....

it's not informative... it's not funny... its The Weekly World News!

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silverback

a lunar pipeline could provide us jobs for a lifetime. Yipee

XenuHubbard

If this is real, I bet that's where Saddam hid those WMD's.

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