rs8001

Drunks. This is my worst movie experience:

Used to live in a college town that had late night movies on weekends. Loud and drunk. People yelled at the screen. The first comment was quite funny. The next twenty were just annoying. Heard a beer bottle (I assume) clack on the floor and roll down at least ten rows. The lovers two rows back talked throughout loud enough for me to hear what they were talking about. A good number of the drunks didn't make it through the whole movie. About half way through two ushers walk up the aisle. They stop and talk before coming back with a mop. Yup, someone tossed their cookies and for five minutes I watched the silhouette of an usher with a mop clean up the mess.

That was the last time I ever went to the late movie. Even now I try to go on slow weeknights just to avoid all of the behaviors listed above.

kidd

Last week, my friends and I saw X2. The theatre was sold out and we got there late, so we all got spread out, but every one of us ended up by someone annoying.

-Kid who felt the need to yell out any XMen comic reference "OMG PHOENIX!"
-Guy who could control his farting and his friend who laughed at it
-Big fat guy who's laughs would shake the seats
-Woman who kept shaking her box of Gobbstoppers.

quest1mark

heres what i hate:

weird stain on almost every movie seat....and i dont think thats butter.

__________________
Best told at a place called...the TFP.
on a quest...

Hedgehog

Babies and toddlers. Get a fucking babysitter. No 3 year old is going to understand X-Men 2, and when he starts babbling at high volume every time there's some dialogue I want to hear, I'm going to walk over and cut his throat in front of you. Leave the baby at home.

Maybe if the fucking theatre made you pay full price for his ticket, or gave you hell for bringing him to a PG-13 movie, this wouldn't happen as much.

__________________
Wait a minute! Where am I, and why am I in this handbasket?

ThatOnePerson

maybe i am insenitive, but i cannot stand when a really fat guy sits near me and has his LARGE popcorn and eighteen different boxes of candy and is out of breath from walking up the stairs but cant wait to eat his damn candy so he stuffs his face and has to breath through his nose but he is congested so his left nostril whistles and then he opens his mouth for more food, and like a swimmer takes that little bit of time when his mouth is open and either breaths out, spraying food everywhere, or breaths in so that he chokes on all the popcorn crumbs in his mouth that are now in his throught so he starts coughing and then the whole process starts over again...... that bothers me

__________________
I don't like long signatures.

Gortexfogg

People who save seats for people who aren't present. I mean, saving one or two seats is understandable, but 2 or 3 people "saving" almost a whole row is ridiculous.
Also, taking people to sci-fi/cult films who know nothing about them. Some previous knowledge is required, or you'll have them asking you to explain everything every two seconds.
Also, little kids. Maybe they should start enforcing that PG-13 rule or just change it to NC-13. When I saw Spiderman, these two ladies (not affiliated with the theatre) came in and roped off 3 or 4 rows in the section right up next to the screen (in front of me). Then a troop of kids no older than 6 or 5 roamed in and I lived in movie hell for 2 hours.

Eviltree

I hate those jackasses with the huge heads/hair when they sit in front of you with their bratty little kids and then the damn kids start imitating the mildly funny things and scream and annoy the fuck out of everyone. Its great being in a movie theatre away from where you live, you can tell them to shut the hell up, and no one you know will know. Damn i'm in an evil mood today, muahaha

440sixpack

I got nothin' new to add but I agree with just about all of these; with the one small caveat that I might be a bit more tolerant of things like wrapper rattles during movies like Black Hawk Down or other flicks of new constant mayhem.

__________________
Be a victor, or be a victim - David Vincent

My Toys:
1970 Dodge Challenger R/T 440SIXPACK
2003 Dodge Ram 1500 SLT QuadCab 4x4 5.7L Hemi Magnum

shakran

I was sitting in a movie theater once - the stadium seating kind - when this dude sat on my head. Seems he wanted to get a picture of his family at the movies (huh? why?) and leaned way back to get them all in frame, not caring that this meant his ass was now on my head.

I got back though. Waited until he started to get up, then stood up REALLY fast straight into his tailbone


thing is, all this movie theater behavior is just another indicator of society's problems. Everyone looks out for #1. They do what they want to do, and screw the consequences to anyone around him.

IMHO, this kind of crap should be illegal. People using cell phones in theaters, concert halls, etc, should be fined. Or the crowd should be allowed to carry out some mob justice on them. Yeah, I like that idea better

KeyserSoze

I hate THE FUKIN COMMERCIALS BEFORE A FILM!!! If I wanted to watch a fucking ad about Coke I would have stayed at home.

I also hate every motherfuker in the theater that is not ME!!

Finally, what the hell is the purpose of having the thermostat set at 40 fucking degrees??

Oh.......I almost forgot..........if you have a really important job and you have to have your cell phone on because you are just that FUCKING IMPORTANT.............wait for the DVD and keep your ass out of MY MOVIE THEATER!!


Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.....that felt good

__________________
THERE IS NO KEYSER SOZE!!

platypus

And the solution to all this? Three words...

Brown...Peanut...M&Ms

If your aims is good, they can leave a mark.

__________________
Out the 10Base-T, through the router, down the T1, over the leased line, off the bridge, past the firewall...nothing but Net.

warrrreagl

It was at the theater during this very movie that I had my only experience with a tobacco dipper.

First of all, it was in Mississippi, so go figure. Secondly, the theater was packed, and the guy was jammed in next to me. He kept raising his coke cup to his face every 15 seconds, going, "Thhpppt, thhhppt-thhppt," and that HORRIBLE smell like rotten teeth, Ben-Gay, and menthol. AGGGHHH!

I asked him to stop and he simply said, "No."

So, I went to the lobby to complain. My sentence to the manager came out as follows: "Do you allow people to chew tobacco in the theaters?" His response was, "Of course. Do you need a spit cup?"

I'm getting sick just re-reading it.

__________________
Living is easy with eyes closed.

Jack Ruby

People talking during the movie, usually about the most obvious fucking things.

__________________
You don't know what you don't know.

iktoweya

people crunching their popcorn really loud and people who dont use straws and slurp on there sodas oh and the tall guy who sits in front of me without fail t every single movie i have ever been to

__________________
i miss K-Wise

VirFighter

Don't have anything to add but....

I hate groups of high schoolers/middle schoolers trying to act cool. I used to be one of them when I was young and stupid but we were only obnoxious when we were seeing a movie that had been out for awhile, never on opening weekend.

Example, I saw Scream 3 with my sister when it originally came out.. unfortunately we saw it in Cary (a suburb of Raleigh that I already hate) and the place was crowded with annoying high schoolers, chatting the whole movie, taking pictures, etc. I wanted to destroy them all and fuck I was in high school when I saw this movie!

__________________
"The South is gonna boogie again"
- Disco Stu

macduck

well, most of the things i find infuriating are already here, but, yesterday, i wnt to see x-me 2, its the middle of the day, is about 20 other people in the theatre, 6 of them happen to be teenagers, maori teenagers at that, so their ensueing commentary is punctuated with frequent exclaimations of; "eh al!!, stop eating all my fuckin' popcorn al!!" , bursts of inane giggling, billy t. james style and for some reason , whenever there was a moment of relative quiet, they would make farting noises, EVERY... SINGLE... FUCKING....QUIET... MOMENT, like it was funny, maybe if you are;
A/ five years old
B/ inbred
C/ a nimrod
or D/ all of the above.
and despite frequent requests to "shut the fuck up!!" they wouldnt, when i got up to walk out at the end of the film, i saw them hurrying out and lo and behold, who is standing right there about 15 feet from us?....the ushers and security, what do they do?, nothing.
so while it was a great movie, the entire experience was negated by these 6 walking skid-marks.

__________________
thy end is nigh

denim

Amen, brother!

phyzix525

anyone loud, people kicking my seat are a pain in the ass, but l usually don't go to the movies on the weekends when all the kiddies are there, so for the most part I don't get annoyed too much.

__________________
It's hard to remember we're alive for the first time
It's hard to remember we're alive for the last time
It's hard to remember to live before you die
It's hard to remember that our lives are such a short time
It's hard to remember when it takes such a long time

Realizm

This has been a pretty long thread, surprised no one mentioned it... I get annoyed at people who come into the theater and then "save'" seats for their 20+ friends, the seats that happen to be one of the better positions in the whole seating arrangement. It's never more annoying going into a seemingly empty row and then hearing somebody say "sorry dude, saved." I'm not willing to sit there anyway, as I'm quite keen to the fact that there's good chance these people will be assholes to me throughout the entire movie, effectively ruining it.

Saving for your girlfriend is one thing, saving for your class is another.



About the babies who cry a lot.. I kind of am on the side of those who bring the babies, some moms out there don't ever have a chance to just go out and enjoy a movie because they are always at home taking care of children. It's harder than you think to find a babysitter. Granted, the crying is quite annoying, but just think.. they have to deal with this 24/7.

Long live moms.

messy

My girlfriend and I went to see "Identity" last night and I came to a conclusion.

NEVER go see a horror flick at the theater. People feel the need to talk way too damn much. There was a group of 5 or 6 people sitting behind us...and after every scary part I heard "I KNEW THAT WAS GONNA HAPPEN!" or something like that.

And then at the end of the film (don't want to ruin it for anyone who hasen't seen it, but...) one of them says "I KNEW IT WAS SO-AND-SO!" Good for you buddy, you won a cookie.

buffto

At nerdie movies, when something cool happens, Nerdy McNerdster starts laughing out loud.

i.e.: LOTR: the two towers, legolas flung his arm around the running horse and jumped on it, (Guy Behind me) MWHAAAHEEEE HAAAH *snort* HASALSUEARPFFFFFTTT.

nightmare

Mr.Deflok, i have never laughed so much. the problem is its all true. amen to you

__________________
License to kill gophers by the government of the United Nations. Man, free to kill gophers at will. To kill, you must know your enemy, and in this case my enemy is a varmint. And a varmint will never quit - ever. They're like the Viet Cong - Varmint Cong. So you have to fall back on superior intelligence and superior firepower. And that's all she wrote.

Podmore

I can tune out most of the distractions when I'm into a movie, but the seat kicking drives me insane. It's usually a kid, and I feel a little badly when I have to turn all the way around and say "When you kick the back of my seat, I feel it! Would you please stop?" That's as friendly as I can make my words, but my face and my tone are deadly serious. If a parent is with them, I make sure that they get some of the eye contact.

neoinoakleys

The 15 minutes of fucking Commercials...what kind of crap is this?? Since when do we have to PAY to see the same fucking commercials that I am being bombarded with on TV all day?? At least if they were new and different commercials, that might even be entertaining, but the EXACT same ones I see on TV??? WTF???

And then after the 15 minutes of damn commercials, you get 5 minutes of previews...

Someone shoot the fucking idiot that came up with this concept.

Will someone tell the damn idiots that insist on talking through the movie behind me to shut the fuck up?? I went to see the new Matrix about a week ago and there was this group of ignorant bastards behind me cracking jokes, asking for popcorn, making fun of the film, etc...

Obviously they were to stupid to understand the film, but I was ready to take that fucking bucket of popcorn and turn it into a suppository for them...to my surprise, though...when the lights came on after the film, I looked back and was expecting a bunch of high schoolers, but instead they were all middle-aged conservative types. I guess inconsiderate assholes come from all walks of life...

__________________
It's My Duty to Please That Booty!!

shakran

"I kind of am on the side of those who bring the babies, some moms out there don't ever have a chance to just go out and enjoy a movie because they are always at home taking care of children. It's harder than you think to find a babysitter. Granted, the crying is quite annoying, but just think.. they have to deal with this 24/7. "



I disagree. Life is full of choices. If you choose to have a kid, that's great, but you do not have the right to impose your children on others. If your kids can behave during the entire movie, that's fine, take 'em all you want. If they haven't reached that point, and they start crying in a movie, you get up and leave. Your decision to have a child does not give you the right to inflict his screaming on 200 people who paid a lot of money to go see a movie. If the kid's a screamer, wait for the DVD.

Oh, and that reminds me. Another pet movie peeve of mine is the fucking idiot parents who take their kids to adult movies. There is NO WAY a 2 year old should be watching Hannibal, but when I went to see it there were almost as many toddlers as adults.

If you have a kid, that involves sacrifices. Too many people refuse to make any - they want the kid but they also want all the fun of a childless life. Sorry, but a kid is a tremendous responsibility which necessitates large sacrifices. If you're unwilling to make those sacrifices, that's understandable, but if that's the case, then don't have a kid.

warrrreagl

You're right, this is bad enough. However, with each of these groups of people, there is always at least one of them who tries to guess what will happen before it actually happens. And he/she will always SAY IT OUT LOUD.

In Identity, it would be something like this: "It's the kid. I'll bet it's the kid."

Okay great. So what do you win for that miraculous guess? The honor and praise of all the moronic losers you came with?

SHADDDUP!

__________________
Living is easy with eyes closed.

mystmarimatt

kind of strange, but those people who bring their four year olds to something with tons of cussing, and if you happen to say 'bitch' as you're walking out of the theatre, they scold you for cussing in front of their child. fucking morons.

__________________
Words of Wisdom:

If you could really get to know someone and know that they weren't lying to you, then you would know the world was real. Because you could agree on things, you could compare notes. That must be why people get married or make Art. So they'll be able to really know something and not go insane.

MSD

I'll admit it, I whisper to my friends at the movies. I only do it when it isn't crowded. If there are only 30 people in the theater, there's a reason we left a 9-row buffer zone around us.

Stiltzkin

When I'm in a movie theater and anyone does anything other than shut the hell up and sit still and watch the movie, I get annoyed. You're not there to do your taxes, answer phone calls, or be a jackass, you're there to watch a movie.

__________________
The most important thing in this world is love.

Pyrate

Funny enough, I hate those people who don't seem to respond to the movies...Those people who seem to be in trance. I hate it man..I didn't know Vulcans watched movies!!!

On the loud teenager note though, if there's sex scenes in a movie or something funny I sometimes bust out with jokes, like I would walk all the way to the front a stand in front of the screen, oogling like fuck, or I would roll on the floor in hysterics...

It cracks people up, I'm a comedian-perfect!

__________________
?

warrrreagl

And it makes a perfect target for a Milk Dud, too.

__________________
Living is easy with eyes closed.

Macheath

Like many people I hate the "cool" thirteen year olds who do all of the obnoxious crap you've all described and more.

But more than that was one particularly bad encouter. You see, I can understand these kids going to see Pluto Nash or maybe even X-Men 2. You know there's going to be certain movies they may turn up at and you brace yourself.

But 'Road to Perdition'....WTF??!!

What's next, laser pointers during 'The Crying Game'?

hawkeye

The teen//pre-teen girls who giggle and sigh every time that they see the flavor-of-the-week 'hunk' and the people who ask questions that the movie answers in about 2 minutes.

__________________
You're not fat,
You're just a giant ball
of love, covered in anger.

mackyroo

Cellphones.
People who don't take their babies out of the theatre when they start crying.
And people who fucking talk during movies, it's annoying, rude, and just downright stupid. You should be watching the movie not talking.

__________________
Official Bullshit.

Pyrate

And I fucking hate those people (usually kids/early teens/mid teens) who have this stupid urge to copy the movie they have just watched. You know them ones, who come out of "The One (Jet Li) and start replicating the movie's fight scenes with half arsed lame looking martial arts poses, or them ones who come in goody goody and start cursing after watching a curse-filled film. Goddamn fools. They're the ones that subliminal messages and marketing strategies target.

__________________
?

Derwood

Simple solution: Movie theaters should all buy those cell phone blocking transmitters. Just turn the entire building into one big OUT OF SERVICE.

Here's a true story:

Saw LOTR: Two Towers on an afternoon about 4 weeks into the run. Maybe 30 or 40 people in the theatre. Just before the previews ended, a dad and his two kids (a boy about 7 years old and a girl about 5) sit down in the row in front of me. This can't be good.

The dad did two things that were just plaing fucking stupid. First, he covered his daughter's eyes whenever something scary was happening (which during Two Towers, is about 2 1/2 hours worth of the movie). The other thing he did was read all of Liv Tyler's subtitled dialogue to his daughter. Um, if a movie has a lot of subtitles, don't bring a kid who can't read yet. What next, a trip to see Crouching Tiger?

Clearly this was a dad who just HAD to see this movie, even if both kids were bored, scared, and just plain antsy. Bringing young children to a long, scary, dark, complicated movie is just a bad idea. And this coming from a dad (we drop our daughter off at Grandma's when we want to see a movie)

__________________
"You can't shoot a country until it becomes a democracy." - Willravel

Sparhawk

At the theater I went to, about 40 or so teenage girls started SHRIEKING AT THE TOP OF THEIR LUNGS when legolas did that. quite a bit more annoying, i'd say...

__________________
"In Iraq, no doubt about it, it's tough. It's hard work. It's incredibly hard. It's - and it's hard work. I understand how hard it is. I get the casualty reports every day. I see on the TV screens how hard it is. But it's necessary work. We're making progress. It is hard work."

Molly Moon

Whenever I go to see a movie, it seems that the people that sit either directly behind or directly in front of me are on the Stereotypical first date.

The girl is cooing and giggling in copius amounts. The male is preening and trying to cop a feel.

I'm trying to watch the movie but the hormone levels are too staggaring to be ignored.

And it doesn't help matters that now my local theature has installed seats where the armrests can be raised. Allowing these lovebirds to all but sit on top of each other.

Forgive the intrusion of the 80's but gag me with a spoon.

cakehole

If you have kids, and you desperately want to see a movie, go to a drive in. Its cheap, your kids can roam free, and no one can hear you scream. Oh, and my pet movie peeve is teenagers in groups. One is usually decent, quite, and unlikely to launch with the popcorn rain. Two+ need a special walled, soundproof, section of the theater to themselves.

monkeydriven

That there are other people there...

__________________
you think i got my eyes closed but i've been lookin' at you the whole f&ckin' time...
------------------------------------------------
Posting from the home of the 2004 World Champion Boston Red Sox