Stewie: FINALLY! Now I can have my SEXY parties!

Motel Owner: This is the bathroom but watch out, we got some bad roaches here.
Roach 1: Hey! You're on our turf man.
Roach 2: Hey man, I... I cut you, I cut you up so bad, you, you gonna, you gonna wish I no cut you up so bad.
Brian: Those are bad roaches.
Motel Owner: I blame the schools.

and

Brian: Hola! Um...me, me llamo es Brian. Ahh, uh, um lets see, uh, nosotros queremos ir con ustedes.
Mexican: Hey that was pretty good. But actually when you said, "Me llamo es Brian," you don't need the "es." Just, "Me llamo Brian."
Brian: Oh, you speak English.
Mexican: No just that first speech and this one explaining it.
Brian: You...you're kidding right?
Mexican: Que?

and you'd have to see it to know how funny it is... the southern accent is priceless. (Dammit Janet)

Peter: “Whoa whoa whoa wait a second? You’re telling me I flew all the way to Kentucky to get some of your fried chicken, and the Colonel isn’t even working today?”
Employee: “He ain’t away, he dead.”
Peter: “What?”
Employee: I say he dead.
Peter: (Louder)“Is Mr. Sanders in?”
Cashier: “What wrong with you? I say you he dead.”
Peter: (Pause, Leans up on the counter and screams) “THE COLONEL!”

Stewie: Look at him, he runs like a Welshman!



Lois: We have to get the children ready for the big meet tomorrow.

Peter: Hehehehehe you said big meat.

Not a quote, persay, but I couldn't stop laughing in that episode where the family goes south and the raccoon/possum keeps attacking Peter. When peter got taken out in the portable outhouse and it flipped I practically missed the rest of the show.

Ah good one is Chris tells the story of his goldfish.

*walks in room*
*attempts to feed goldfish*
*notices puddles leading to broken window*
Chris: Oh my god, my fish is gone
*looks over to broken piggy bank*
Chris: and he robbed me

Same episode where Peter teaches Chris how to get a free meal... I laughed at that one for weeks.

I love the bloodthirsty monkey that threatens to kill chris

P: You wanna know what my problem is, Lois?... I love too much!!
L: Peter, what are you talking about?!
P: Can't you see it, Lois???, we're alive!!!
L: Peter, you're scarying me...
P: Good, embrace the fear!! Dance with me, Lois!!!. Dance the dance of life!!!
(He jumps up and down and crashes into a table)

This was just on last night in fact. Peter got sued for telling a boob joke at work and he has to go to a female's retreat for senstivity training. When he comes back, he's pretty much a chick right? I love the part where Peter takes stewie to his nipple and stewie starts sucking on it half assleep and he wakes up, pulls a hair out of his mouth, realizes and pretty much has a breakdown!

Hilarious!:lol:

"You might have killed her when you hit her with the chair. You might have killed her when you stuffed all those dolar bills down her throat. I don't know, I'm not a doctor. But I'll tell you what diidn't kill her--- smoking"

"SHERRIFF Officer TJ Hooker. And this is my partner, McMillan and Wife"

"It's not so much I want to KILL (Lois). I just want her not to be alive anymore."

" Alright but you owe me. Later tonight, I get anal. (pause) No matter how clean I want the house you have to clean it."

My 2 favorite things are -

1) when he was making fun of the network and he was something to the effect of "what are they gonna do cut our budget?!" then they took away the animation for his movement and he sort of wobbled back and forth to the kitchen... Not the best description but if you remember it, its a classic moment.

2) when he says "wait a minute, what are these doing here" and he takes his chin off his face and stuffs it into his pants like it is supposed to be his balls...

I love humor like that. Where it is actually making fun of the show itself. It's always good to laugh at ones self...

Stewie singing Elton John's "Rocketman"

"and i'm going to be high.........as a kite"

I use this one about every day:

Stewie: "This calls for a sexy party!"