Men and Doctors... what's the deal? - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

BlueBongo · 06-23-2004, 03:30 PM

So phred tells me he's been having some slight trouble in his throat with a lump and has a bit of a flutter for 30 seconds with trouble breathing... mind you he has a history of asthma.

So sitting next to me.. he has it again. I say "Go see a doctor"... so he wants to wait until he can get into a doctor... but I would prefer he go see someone tonight if this happens again because it worries me.. he hasn't had any major problems in the time I've been with him.

So what's the deal with guys not going to the doctor till the woman forces them?

Seriously... if there is something wrong, go see a doctor. After my bat with skin cancer last year.. I am ALL about going to the doctor at the first signs.

Even my dad would wait until he is almost dead or lost a leg before he makes an appoitment.

What's up with this? Any ideas??? because I'm baffled... and I will make him see someone sooner than later if this problem presists.

Just wondering if anyone can answer this life's mystery for me of men and doctors?

la petite moi · 06-23-2004, 03:39 PM

I don't think it's JUST guys. My mother didn't get a mammogram for years, and now she's been diagnosed with breast cancer. Everyone just thinks it won't happen to them.

maleficent · 06-23-2004, 03:50 PM

LPM's right, it's not just men -

I'm not a lot better with doctors, after many many bouts of sun poisoning as a teenager, now, I get all sorts of moles and stuff that get removed, because I know my odds of getting skin cancer are extremely high, it's a struggle to go to the doctor to have them removed. Why? Because I'm not sure I really want to know the results.

Sometimes we can delude ourselves into thinking there's really nothing wrong, and tehre may be nothing wrong, but as long as we don't go to the doctor, then there is truly nothing wrong. However, that worry is always in the back of your head.

The rational part of my brain tells me I shoudl just go, and get it over with, and if there is a problem then I'll deal with it, and that's the part that wins in the end, but there's taht other part of my brain that says, well, if you don't go, then there's nothing wrong, if there was something wrong, you'd feel worse.

I hate going to doctors. I go only when it's extremely necessary.

*Nikki* · 06-23-2004, 05:19 PM

I am the opposite. The minute something is wrong I go to the doctor. I have no fear of them.

This might have to do with almost everyone in my family including me being in the medical profession. I have been around it all my life so I have no adversion to it at all.

But trying to get my boyfriend to go is another story. Hell he won't even take something for a headache until he feels like he is dying. His threory is that "it will just go away".

raeanna74 · 06-23-2004, 06:58 PM

I think maybe they see it as a weakness to see a Dr. Also I think sometimes they feel like it's a violation of their privacy - at least if it's anything below the waist that's malfunctioning.

I think hubby is slowly learning that an once of prevention is worth a pound of cure and is more willing to go when something ISN'T too bad off. Like when we let an ingrown toenail go too long and they had to stick a huge needle all the way down his toe from tip to nuckle in order to numb it. Ouch. I think my Dad is that way too - while my brother, who is much younger, is still very against seeing the Dr for complaints that aren't actually killing him YET.

lurkette · 06-24-2004, 05:41 AM

Though there are a lot of women out there who don't go to the doctor till the last minute (guilty as charged) there was a study last year that found that men are less likely to go see a doctor until the last minute. I think part of it is that "weakness" thing - the same impulse that has them not ask for directions, not read the instructions for putting things together, not calling an electrician or a plumber and trying to fix it themselves. I suffer from the same impulse sometimes (witness the mess I've made of our washing machine instead of calling a repair guy. It's ugly, but it works!).

hossified · 06-24-2004, 06:37 AM

..oops, I forgot to look in my pants before posting..

maleficent · 06-24-2004, 06:42 AM

Hossified, did you forget your gender again?

annie1 · 06-24-2004, 11:34 AM

All the men in my life have the same dr. issue, wont ever go! I'm the opposite too, if i feel like I am getting sick, I go straight to the dr. Cant get better til after you start on the meds so why wait?

sillygirl · 06-24-2004, 02:44 PM

I hate doctors. I hate them with a passion. I go when forced.

06-23-2004, 03:50 PM	#3 (permalink)
maleficent Junkie Moderator Emeritus Location: Chicago	LPM's right, it's not just men - I'm not a lot better with doctors, after many many bouts of sun poisoning as a teenager, now, I get all sorts of moles and stuff that get removed, because I know my odds of getting skin cancer are extremely high, it's a struggle to go to the doctor to have them removed. Why? Because I'm not sure I really want to know the results. Sometimes we can delude ourselves into thinking there's really nothing wrong, and tehre may be nothing wrong, but as long as we don't go to the doctor, then there is truly nothing wrong. However, that worry is always in the back of your head. The rational part of my brain tells me I shoudl just go, and get it over with, and if there is a problem then I'll deal with it, and that's the part that wins in the end, but there's taht other part of my brain that says, well, if you don't go, then there's nothing wrong, if there was something wrong, you'd feel worse. I hate going to doctors. I go only when it's extremely necessary. __________________ Free your heart from hatred. Free your mind from worries. Live simply. Give more. Expect less.

06-23-2004, 06:58 PM	#5 (permalink)
raeanna74 I'm not a blonde! I'm knot! I'm knot! I'm knot! Location: Upper Michigan	I think maybe they see it as a weakness to see a Dr. Also I think sometimes they feel like it's a violation of their privacy - at least if it's anything below the waist that's malfunctioning. I think hubby is slowly learning that an once of prevention is worth a pound of cure and is more willing to go when something ISN'T too bad off. Like when we let an ingrown toenail go too long and they had to stick a huge needle all the way down his toe from tip to nuckle in order to numb it. Ouch. I think my Dad is that way too - while my brother, who is much younger, is still very against seeing the Dr for complaints that aren't actually killing him YET. __________________ "Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama My Karma just ran over your Dogma.

06-24-2004, 05:41 AM	#6 (permalink)
lurkette My future is coming on Moderator Emeritus Location: east of the sun and west of the moon	Though there are a lot of women out there who don't go to the doctor till the last minute (guilty as charged) there was a study last year that found that men are less likely to go see a doctor until the last minute. I think part of it is that "weakness" thing - the same impulse that has them not ask for directions, not read the instructions for putting things together, not calling an electrician or a plumber and trying to fix it themselves. I suffer from the same impulse sometimes (witness the mess I've made of our washing machine instead of calling a repair guy. It's ugly, but it works!). __________________ "If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing." - Anatole France

06-24-2004, 06:37 AM	#7 (permalink)
hossified face f$cker Location: canada	..oops, I forgot to look in my pants before posting.. Last edited by SiN; 06-24-2004 at 12:28 PM..

06-24-2004, 06:42 AM	#8 (permalink)
maleficent Junkie Moderator Emeritus Location: Chicago	Hossified, did you forget your gender again? __________________ Free your heart from hatred. Free your mind from worries. Live simply. Give more. Expect less.

06-23-2004, 03:39 PM	#2 (permalink)
la petite moi Filling the Void. Location: California	I don't think it's JUST guys. My mother didn't get a mammogram for years, and now she's been diagnosed with breast cancer. Everyone just thinks it won't happen to them.

06-23-2004, 05:19 PM	#4 (permalink)
Nikki ~~~~~~~ Location: Charleston, SC	I am the opposite. The minute something is wrong I go to the doctor. I have no fear of them. This might have to do with almost everyone in my family including me being in the medical profession. I have been around it all my life so I have no adversion to it at all. But trying to get my boyfriend to go is another story. Hell he won't even take something for a headache until he feels like he is dying. His threory is that "it will just go away".

06-24-2004, 11:34 AM	#9 (permalink)
annie1 Insane	All the men in my life have the same dr. issue, wont ever go! I'm the opposite too, if i feel like I am getting sick, I go straight to the dr. Cant get better til after you start on the meds so why wait?

06-24-2004, 02:44 PM	#10 (permalink)
sillygirl Newlywed Location: at home	I hate doctors. I hate them with a passion. I go when forced. __________________ Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly-Rose Franken ....absence makes me miss him more...