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Old 02-11-2004, 09:20 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Location: Washington, D.C.
gifts - public or private?

When are romantic tokens the most meaningful to you - when you receive them in front of other people, or in privacy?

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I may be strange, but I hate to get gifts (especially on Valentine's day) in public because I feel like they're more for other people to see than for me to enjoy - even when I genuinely enjoy them! This is particularly true of flowers.

Once, I had to cancel a date because I was sick as a dog (a high fever and nausea) and my date decided that it would be a good idea to call my roommate and come over anyway to cheer me up with a bouquet of flowers. Despite the periodic vomiting. (Honestly, what was he thinking? ) There I was on the couch in my nasty sweats, covered in sick germs, trying to do some reading but really just falling asleep and waiting for it to be 8pm so that I wouldn't feel like a total wuss for going to bed... then there was a mysterious phone call in the other room that took an unusually long time for a "wrong number." Next thing I know, the dope is standing in the doorway with a bunch of flowers in hand putting on a show for my roommates. What a great guy. It got even better when he decided to sit on the couch with me to keep me company (read: awake and away from my porcelain friend) until well past midnight. I was so sick and tired that I wanted to die... and take him with me.
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Old 02-12-2004, 02:16 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Re: gifts - public or private?

Quote:
Originally posted by Supple Cow
When are romantic tokens the most meaningful to you - when you receive them in front of other people, or in privacy?
Depends on what the gift is. If it's flowers I don't mind to receive it in front of a bunch of people. But if it's a birthday gift/Valentine's gift from my boyfriend I know it's bound to be something personal and therefore I really prefer receiving it in private!
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Old 02-12-2004, 02:31 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Gifts? What are those?
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Old 02-12-2004, 11:00 AM   #4 (permalink)
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They mean more in private. Receiving a gift in public is good in my eyes as long as it's not done to show off.

On my first anniversary with an ex-boyfriend, he showed up at the house(full of family and friends) and presented me with a 'wife' card and one large red rose. I was slightly embarassed when my family read the 'wife' card because it held personal feelings inside that him and I shared with each other. Besides, I had the whole family thinking he was proposing to me!
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Old 02-12-2004, 01:33 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Stuff like flowers, I don't mind...but the more personal stuff, yes, I'd rather he give it to me in private.
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Old 02-12-2004, 04:57 PM   #6 (permalink)
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I don't mind geting stuff like clothes and jewelery in public, but I am really really embarased to get flowers or just a big corny bag. I hate that.
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Old 02-14-2004, 09:19 AM   #7 (permalink)
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One of my coworker's husband sent her a signing telegram for V-day. A lot of the other teachers were jealous. She was pleased, yet embarrassed. I think it all depends on the motive -- public is great if it is truly for me and not for show. Private can be a lot more fun when it is intimate.
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Old 02-14-2004, 07:28 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Public, private... I don't care. It's the thought that counts. Sincerity rocks.
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Old 02-15-2004, 08:30 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Location: Louisville, KY
I don't mind public flowers...that's kind of nice, to have flowers sent to me at work or something (not that its happened but I can imagine) Most other stuff...I'd rather it just be me and him, so I can thank him properly. :-)
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Old 02-15-2004, 11:33 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Location: Good Ol' Iowa.. Home of The Hawkeyes
It isn't so much of a material gift that means the most as much as it is the gift of a word spoken or typed form the heart in public. Now in private. Well I don't mind recieving something like lingerie or something on that note.
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Old 02-17-2004, 07:17 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Location: Dallas
well....this year he gave me a big bouqet of flowers while I was at work....then I got home....he had a great big teddy bear with a big balloon in our bed.

I really liked both of them....I like getting gifts period...so I guess it really doesn't matter to me
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Old 02-17-2004, 04:46 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I hadn't ever really thought about this before- I suppose in public (like a restaurant, or on a date or something) is good, but I really prefer private gift exchanges.

Something about the intimacy and sharing the moment with the person giving you the gift, and my family is so damned nosy, I'd never have a chance to see the present myself.

That being said, I got my engagement ring from my husband in a pool table with both of my parents there- he wanted them to be a part of the moment.
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Old 02-18-2004, 12:44 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Location: Thousand Oaks, CA
I prefer receiving gifts in private as well. Showing them off afterwards is always an option, but those few minutes when the gift is given and received allows for heartfelt thank-you's to be exchanged without distraction.
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