Strength - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

JadziaDax · 09-06-2003, 05:46 AM

Use these ten tips to celebrate your strengths! Developing physical, emotional and mental strength helps you to achieve your goals, help other people and take care of yourself. It's okay to be strong, purposeful and powerful!

Discover what you want in a relationship and you'll find out who means most.
Ever wonder how you get along with your close friends? Step back and see your differences: needs, wants and feelings. Boundaries are okay, they give both people room to have their own experiences. By sharing differences, you and your friends can strengthen your relationships.

Strength Tip 1
Write a description of the qualities and values you look for in a friend. How do your current friendships match up?
Change your ways, and create a better version of yourself.
You are who you want to be. Pay attention to what's in your heart. Take risks and try new things; you can create power over your life. "If you keep doing what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always gotten."

Strength Tip 2
Think outside the box. Explore new ways to solve old problems. Go to bed an hour earlier. Make a date with yourself and examine what's going on in your life! Life is what you make of it. Be creative!
Physical strength, combined with mental and emotional strength, make you a force to be reckoned with!
It's no secret, minds and bodies work best when they are in sync. Exercising the body reduces stress and improves overall energy. Exercising the mind helps you handle the challenges of both victory and defeat. Mind, body and spirit working as one will give you confidence and discipline to follow your dreams.

Strength Tip 3
Bring balance to your life by nurturing body, mind and soul equally. One won't work well without the other. List ways you can feed all three. Read a good book, jump rope, watch less TV, join a new club.
Tell yourself where you want to go in life; you'll get there faster.
You can't get to a great future on girl power alone. You need a plan. Knowing where you want to take your life will drive you to learn and grow. Everyday choices impact the achievement of your goals! What future is calling you?

Strength Tip 4
Create a mission statement. Include where you imagine yourself in the future. Map out a plan to get yourself there. Your mission statement today is your reality tomorrow. Dream on and go, girl!
When others' actions frustrate you, think of a better way to respond.
The reality is you do not have control over other people and their actions. You can only control the way you react. Discuss whatever issues have come up with your friend. If their behavior does not change, then adapt, change your behavior and you can move forward. Reality only bites if you let it.

Strength Tip 5
Identify a problem. Then brainstorm ways to approach it. (Even if it's ridiculous! ) Which strategy is the best (with the fewest bad consequences)? Act on it and change the situation.
Practice ways to relax and they'll become "good for you " habits.
Don't freak out! Chill out! Stress is very normal. Calming down during frantic or worrisome times requires a soothing ritual. Breathe, stretch, close your eyes. Don't try to be a super-woman; use your super-powers to save your last nerve.

Strength Tip 6
How can you relax? Count to ten. Take deep, slow breaths. Take a walk. Close your bedroom door and dare to take a nap! Give your body a break, whichever way works best for you.
Exercise for fitness, and beautiful bodies happen naturally.
Do you exercise to lose weight? Instead, try exercising to develop strength, endurance, flexibility and improved cardiovascular fitness. Research shows that women who exercise to reach fitness goals have a better body image than those who exercise to lose weight.

Strength Tip 7
Focus on what your body can do instead of how it looks. Have fun. Stay active. Dance around your bedroom when no one is looking.
Mistakes are natural, unavoidable and great teachers.
Mistakes make us better. In Hollywood, "Take Three" happens all the time. Actors count on "missed takes" to get them closer and closer to their best performance. Even a softball hitter has to strike out 60% of the time to hit an amazing .400.

Strength Tip 8
Think of how a mistake led you to find a better solution. Turning mistakes into learning opportunities builds confidence and gets you closer to achieving your goals.
Speak positively and you'll see a better picture.
Do you ever say things like, "Everyone thinks I'm a loser?" or "No one will ever like me?" Overgeneralizing or dramatizing how you feel creates a distorted view of yourself. Positive words are powerful. Speak up and your self will listen.

Strength Tip 9
Put your view in proper perspective. Instead of saying, "She'll never be my friend again," try saying, "Her feelings are hurt right now and we need to work this out.” Remember, you are what you speak.
Love who you are and you'll become a beautiful woman!
Many body changes are taking place right now. You may think you are beautiful one day and not the next. You're still a normal teenager. Don't try to fit a certain body image. All women have been there and lived through it. Embrace what's unique.

Strength Tip 10
Nurture your body as it changes. Eat right, exercise and treat your body to gifts like specialty lotions or a pedicure. Buy clothes that flatter your current body type (not just what's in style).

Thanks to Proctor & Gamble, the makers of Secret Anti-Perspirant, whose aim is to help girls realize their inherent capacity to manifest energy, to endure, and to resist. Strength is the secret behind building self-esteem in girls.

sexymama · 09-06-2003, 03:54 PM

This is an awesome post.
1. I value friends who are honest, supportive, fun to hang with, and who value personal growth

2. I work on this one every day -- but have not had a date with myself in a long time. I will set one this week!

3. In the last 6 months I have read several good books, cut WAY back on TV (and don't miss it), worked out regularly, and joined TFP

4. My mission: be open to new opportunities; nurture those around me; take care of my body and my mind; grow intellectually, spiritually, and emotionally; learn something new everyday; present my best side to my family and partner; and focus on the positive.
(This is basically it, although some of the exact wording may change year to year.)

5. As a teacher, a mother, and a partner I am continually identifying problems and working on solving them. This is actually one of my strengths -- so "no problem" here.

6. Wow -- I just took a nap this afternoon. I told my kids I'm tired and I need "me" time. They understood and I felt great! It is imperative that we take time for ourselves in order to have enough to give those we love.

7. Amen!

8. I just made a mistake yesterday that was a very good reminder to me to think before speaking. I seem to need to be reminded of that frequently -- but the mistakes help. (And all is forgiven and forgotten on the "hurt" persons side -- it is never as big of deal to them as it is to me.)

9. When we think positive we are positive. I like this one!

10. That is why I work out -- I will never be a model, but I have a wonderful, healthy body and I take care of it.

galaxygirl · 09-08-2003, 05:44 PM

I love the idea of a mission statement. I'm going to print this and think it over. Thanks!

rosie21 · 09-08-2003, 07:39 PM

Minx · 09-09-2003, 12:02 PM

What a great idea Jadzia! Thanks for the super thread. I think we all need, every once in a while, to step back and look at our attitudes with an open heart and mind. And, to ultimately be honest with ourselves and our dealings with those around us, and also how we look at ourselves.

1. The qualities and values I look for in a friend are simple....honesty, integrity, compassion and a sence of humor and dry wit help a lot!

Intelligence too....I couldn't have a true friend if we weren't on the same wave length.

2. "Life is what we make of it"....how very true this statement is! I am going to make a concerted effort to just accept what I have and not look for more than that. I have a very good life, great children of whom I am very very proud, a loving and close family, a roof over my head and food on the table. What more does a person really need? I am all I need.

3. List ways to feed body, mind and soul. Hmmmm, well I have been trying to get out for walks everyday with my kids after dinner, or at the very least to work out on my step-machine. I'm in good shape, basically, but I absolutely have to work on some better eating habits! I'm one of those people who eats only one meal a day....bad girl!

The feeding of the mind is the easy part for me as I have my confidante/best bud at work every day to keep the grey matter flowing and growing. Ahhh, the soul. Well, that is the hard one for me as deep down I am a little...discontented. But, every single day I sit on my bench in my back yard and I watch the sun go down. It turns all the grasses on the hill behind my place to gold and is the most gorgeous sight ever. Makes me smile inside everytime and it is my "me" time!

That...and laughing with my boys....that is the best balm for the soul ever!

4. A mission statement for where I want to get in life is, also, for me quite easy. As far as my job goes, I'm fortunate in that I have a very bright future ahead of me. In "x" amount of years the torch will be handed down to me so my future is quite secure that way. The only thing that I regret/crave is to own a home again soon. Not easy as a single parent but I want to provide that stability for my kids....and I suppose to make up for the mistakes I made in the past (as far as stupid decisions with "material" items go). I am already saving for their education (of course) but a home to call our own.......heaven.

5. "Identify a problem" when other's actions frustrate you. Well.......I guess my approach is to have the point of view that I cannot change people around me, or the way they think, or act. So...you just have to accept the fact that some people you will disagree or not get along with and move on. I will change the things I can and I cannot (and will not) ever change another person so the trick is acceptance. And when things get really crazy and I need to vent...I go to my buddy!

6. This entire idea of relaxing sounds great! I am pretty busy though and I think my body thrives a little on the action/stress factor! Although, as mentioned above - I do get my own little "down" time each evening when I'm in my backyard. And, if I had just a wee bit more time I would like to learn some meditating techniques....nothing crazy just enough to ease the spirit of the soul when things get silly. Yoga anyone?!

7. "Dance around your bedroom when no-one is looking" OMG! That is so me! lol...shhhhhhhh - don't tell anyone though! A strong body is a beautiful body regardless of its size/shape....and a strong mind is just as important. My two cents there!

8. Learning from one's mistakes.....ahhh now if this isn't the be-all-end-all of life I don't know what is. No one is perfect and we shouldn't press ourselves to be. We should press ourselves to be the best we can but everyone makes mistakes...it's called being human. The trick is to be able to 1) admit your mistake 2) try to find a way to solve it and 3) learn from it so it becomes a "life lesson" and not a regret. We can only grow by realizing what we have done wrong in the past and by trying to improve upon that.

9. And here we come to the issue of a positive attitude. Oh man, I am always harping on my poor friend about the power of a positive attitude. I am a believer in looking at the good in people, hoping for the best, trusting people and living the thrill from dreams and hopes. If we don't have anything to look forward to, and to hope for then it would be a dreary world.
And...there is a lot of power to the thought that if you feel good about yourself you project that image to those around you. Almost everyone is drawn to a confident, happy person.

10. "Nurture your body and accept it's changes" Well, as stated before I could take better care of myself I know but as far as accepting myself and the way I am - I am very confident with that aspect. I love the skin I am in right now (yes, even after two darlings!) and I think (hope) that feeling is projected to those around me.

Thanks again Jadzia for giving us a little insight/look into ourselves.

anti fishstick · 09-10-2003, 11:25 AM

wow. this is a great post. thanks!

1. ah it is true that a lot of my friends are different from me. but we all share relatively the same goals and needs which bring us together. we have positive outlooks and always want to persevere. "i am women hear me roar"

2. ah i am always trying to be the best version of myself.

i am a pessimist who trained myself to be optimist and an idealist who
trained myself to be a realist and try to follow intuition as often as i can... you are the choices you make. but i should seize the moment more often.... carpe diem.

3. now this is a bit tougher ;P i need to up my physical strength and start working out.

4.i take things day by day and try to live in the present instead of thinking and worrying about the future. but i'm not *afraid* of it. and i have plans. not solid "this is exactly what my life will be in 10 years" plans.. but enough room for it to change and grow without losing its original intent. i like to think of my life thus far more as a compass to this goal, instead of a carefully planned out roadtrip map ;P

5. just remember to take a deep breath... *breathe*

6. i agree. even working out for 20 minutes makes me feel a lot better about myself

7. i never regret mistakes because i can learn from them

8. yes! i used to be a pretty bad pessimist. but one quote that really kept me going in trying to change my out look was "i have this theory that if we're told we're bad then that's the only ideal we'll ever have"-jewel. so i was told i was shy all my life. is that what makes me who i am? if i want to i -know- i can change.

9. mmm and people will notice too

09-06-2003, 05:46 AM	#1 (permalink)
JadziaDax Loser Location: who the fuck cares?	Strength Use these ten tips to celebrate your strengths! Developing physical, emotional and mental strength helps you to achieve your goals, help other people and take care of yourself. It's okay to be strong, purposeful and powerful! Discover what you want in a relationship and you'll find out who means most. Ever wonder how you get along with your close friends? Step back and see your differences: needs, wants and feelings. Boundaries are okay, they give both people room to have their own experiences. By sharing differences, you and your friends can strengthen your relationships. Strength Tip 1 Write a description of the qualities and values you look for in a friend. How do your current friendships match up? Change your ways, and create a better version of yourself. You are who you want to be. Pay attention to what's in your heart. Take risks and try new things; you can create power over your life. "If you keep doing what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always gotten." Strength Tip 2 Think outside the box. Explore new ways to solve old problems. Go to bed an hour earlier. Make a date with yourself and examine what's going on in your life! Life is what you make of it. Be creative! Physical strength, combined with mental and emotional strength, make you a force to be reckoned with! It's no secret, minds and bodies work best when they are in sync. Exercising the body reduces stress and improves overall energy. Exercising the mind helps you handle the challenges of both victory and defeat. Mind, body and spirit working as one will give you confidence and discipline to follow your dreams. Strength Tip 3 Bring balance to your life by nurturing body, mind and soul equally. One won't work well without the other. List ways you can feed all three. Read a good book, jump rope, watch less TV, join a new club. Tell yourself where you want to go in life; you'll get there faster. You can't get to a great future on girl power alone. You need a plan. Knowing where you want to take your life will drive you to learn and grow. Everyday choices impact the achievement of your goals! What future is calling you? Strength Tip 4 Create a mission statement. Include where you imagine yourself in the future. Map out a plan to get yourself there. Your mission statement today is your reality tomorrow. Dream on and go, girl! When others' actions frustrate you, think of a better way to respond. The reality is you do not have control over other people and their actions. You can only control the way you react. Discuss whatever issues have come up with your friend. If their behavior does not change, then adapt, change your behavior and you can move forward. Reality only bites if you let it. Strength Tip 5 Identify a problem. Then brainstorm ways to approach it. (Even if it's ridiculous! ) Which strategy is the best (with the fewest bad consequences)? Act on it and change the situation. Practice ways to relax and they'll become "good for you " habits. Don't freak out! Chill out! Stress is very normal. Calming down during frantic or worrisome times requires a soothing ritual. Breathe, stretch, close your eyes. Don't try to be a super-woman; use your super-powers to save your last nerve. Strength Tip 6 How can you relax? Count to ten. Take deep, slow breaths. Take a walk. Close your bedroom door and dare to take a nap! Give your body a break, whichever way works best for you. Exercise for fitness, and beautiful bodies happen naturally. Do you exercise to lose weight? Instead, try exercising to develop strength, endurance, flexibility and improved cardiovascular fitness. Research shows that women who exercise to reach fitness goals have a better body image than those who exercise to lose weight. Strength Tip 7 Focus on what your body can do instead of how it looks. Have fun. Stay active. Dance around your bedroom when no one is looking. Mistakes are natural, unavoidable and great teachers. Mistakes make us better. In Hollywood, "Take Three" happens all the time. Actors count on "missed takes" to get them closer and closer to their best performance. Even a softball hitter has to strike out 60% of the time to hit an amazing .400. Strength Tip 8 Think of how a mistake led you to find a better solution. Turning mistakes into learning opportunities builds confidence and gets you closer to achieving your goals. Speak positively and you'll see a better picture. Do you ever say things like, "Everyone thinks I'm a loser?" or "No one will ever like me?" Overgeneralizing or dramatizing how you feel creates a distorted view of yourself. Positive words are powerful. Speak up and your self will listen. Strength Tip 9 Put your view in proper perspective. Instead of saying, "She'll never be my friend again," try saying, "Her feelings are hurt right now and we need to work this out.” Remember, you are what you speak. Love who you are and you'll become a beautiful woman! Many body changes are taking place right now. You may think you are beautiful one day and not the next. You're still a normal teenager. Don't try to fit a certain body image. All women have been there and lived through it. Embrace what's unique. Strength Tip 10 Nurture your body as it changes. Eat right, exercise and treat your body to gifts like specialty lotions or a pedicure. Buy clothes that flatter your current body type (not just what's in style). Thanks to Proctor & Gamble, the makers of Secret Anti-Perspirant, whose aim is to help girls realize their inherent capacity to manifest energy, to endure, and to resist. Strength is the secret behind building self-esteem in girls.

09-06-2003, 03:54 PM	#2 (permalink)
sexymama My own person -- his by choice Location: Lebell's arms	This is an awesome post. 1. I value friends who are honest, supportive, fun to hang with, and who value personal growth 2. I work on this one every day -- but have not had a date with myself in a long time. I will set one this week! 3. In the last 6 months I have read several good books, cut WAY back on TV (and don't miss it), worked out regularly, and joined TFP 4. My mission: be open to new opportunities; nurture those around me; take care of my body and my mind; grow intellectually, spiritually, and emotionally; learn something new everyday; present my best side to my family and partner; and focus on the positive. (This is basically it, although some of the exact wording may change year to year.) 5. As a teacher, a mother, and a partner I am continually identifying problems and working on solving them. This is actually one of my strengths -- so "no problem" here. 6. Wow -- I just took a nap this afternoon. I told my kids I'm tired and I need "me" time. They understood and I felt great! It is imperative that we take time for ourselves in order to have enough to give those we love. 7. Amen! 8. I just made a mistake yesterday that was a very good reminder to me to think before speaking. I seem to need to be reminded of that frequently -- but the mistakes help. (And all is forgiven and forgotten on the "hurt" persons side -- it is never as big of deal to them as it is to me.) 9. When we think positive we are positive. I like this one! 10. That is why I work out -- I will never be a model, but I have a wonderful, healthy body and I take care of it. __________________ If you can go deeply into lovemaking, the ego disappears. That is the beauty of lovemaking, that it is another source of a glimpse of god It's not about being perfect; it's about developing some skill at managing imperfection.

09-08-2003, 05:44 PM	#3 (permalink)
galaxygirl Insane Location: NH	I love the idea of a mission statement. I'm going to print this and think it over. Thanks! __________________ Drawing strength from His acceptance, offering all that I am and ever will be

09-08-2003, 07:39 PM	#4 (permalink)
rosie21 Tilted	.. Last edited by rosie21; 05-21-2007 at 01:16 PM..

09-09-2003, 12:02 PM	#5 (permalink)
Minx Junkie Location: Up yonder	What a great idea Jadzia! Thanks for the super thread. I think we all need, every once in a while, to step back and look at our attitudes with an open heart and mind. And, to ultimately be honest with ourselves and our dealings with those around us, and also how we look at ourselves. 1. The qualities and values I look for in a friend are simple....honesty, integrity, compassion and a sence of humor and dry wit help a lot! Intelligence too....I couldn't have a true friend if we weren't on the same wave length. 2. "Life is what we make of it"....how very true this statement is! I am going to make a concerted effort to just accept what I have and not look for more than that. I have a very good life, great children of whom I am very very proud, a loving and close family, a roof over my head and food on the table. What more does a person really need? I am all I need. 3. List ways to feed body, mind and soul. Hmmmm, well I have been trying to get out for walks everyday with my kids after dinner, or at the very least to work out on my step-machine. I'm in good shape, basically, but I absolutely have to work on some better eating habits! I'm one of those people who eats only one meal a day....bad girl! The feeding of the mind is the easy part for me as I have my confidante/best bud at work every day to keep the grey matter flowing and growing. Ahhh, the soul. Well, that is the hard one for me as deep down I am a little...discontented. But, every single day I sit on my bench in my back yard and I watch the sun go down. It turns all the grasses on the hill behind my place to gold and is the most gorgeous sight ever. Makes me smile inside everytime and it is my "me" time! That...and laughing with my boys....that is the best balm for the soul ever! 4. A mission statement for where I want to get in life is, also, for me quite easy. As far as my job goes, I'm fortunate in that I have a very bright future ahead of me. In "x" amount of years the torch will be handed down to me so my future is quite secure that way. The only thing that I regret/crave is to own a home again soon. Not easy as a single parent but I want to provide that stability for my kids....and I suppose to make up for the mistakes I made in the past (as far as stupid decisions with "material" items go). I am already saving for their education (of course) but a home to call our own.......heaven. 5. "Identify a problem" when other's actions frustrate you. Well.......I guess my approach is to have the point of view that I cannot change people around me, or the way they think, or act. So...you just have to accept the fact that some people you will disagree or not get along with and move on. I will change the things I can and I cannot (and will not) ever change another person so the trick is acceptance. And when things get really crazy and I need to vent...I go to my buddy! 6. This entire idea of relaxing sounds great! I am pretty busy though and I think my body thrives a little on the action/stress factor! Although, as mentioned above - I do get my own little "down" time each evening when I'm in my backyard. And, if I had just a wee bit more time I would like to learn some meditating techniques....nothing crazy just enough to ease the spirit of the soul when things get silly. Yoga anyone?! 7. "Dance around your bedroom when no-one is looking" OMG! That is so me! lol...shhhhhhhh - don't tell anyone though! A strong body is a beautiful body regardless of its size/shape....and a strong mind is just as important. My two cents there! 8. Learning from one's mistakes.....ahhh now if this isn't the be-all-end-all of life I don't know what is. No one is perfect and we shouldn't press ourselves to be. We should press ourselves to be the best we can but everyone makes mistakes...it's called being human. The trick is to be able to 1) admit your mistake 2) try to find a way to solve it and 3) learn from it so it becomes a "life lesson" and not a regret. We can only grow by realizing what we have done wrong in the past and by trying to improve upon that. 9. And here we come to the issue of a positive attitude. Oh man, I am always harping on my poor friend about the power of a positive attitude. I am a believer in looking at the good in people, hoping for the best, trusting people and living the thrill from dreams and hopes. If we don't have anything to look forward to, and to hope for then it would be a dreary world. And...there is a lot of power to the thought that if you feel good about yourself you project that image to those around you. Almost everyone is drawn to a confident, happy person. 10. "Nurture your body and accept it's changes" Well, as stated before I could take better care of myself I know but as far as accepting myself and the way I am - I am very confident with that aspect. I love the skin I am in right now (yes, even after two darlings!) and I think (hope) that feeling is projected to those around me. Thanks again Jadzia for giving us a little insight/look into ourselves. __________________ You've been a naughty boy....go to my room!

09-10-2003, 11:25 AM	#6 (permalink)
anti fishstick Post-modernism meets Individualism AKA the Clash Location: oregon	Re: Strength wow. this is a great post. thanks! 1. ah it is true that a lot of my friends are different from me. but we all share relatively the same goals and needs which bring us together. we have positive outlooks and always want to persevere. "i am women hear me roar" 2. ah i am always trying to be the best version of myself. i am a pessimist who trained myself to be optimist and an idealist who trained myself to be a realist and try to follow intuition as often as i can... you are the choices you make. but i should seize the moment more often.... carpe diem. 3. now this is a bit tougher ;P i need to up my physical strength and start working out. 4.i take things day by day and try to live in the present instead of thinking and worrying about the future. but i'm not afraid of it. and i have plans. not solid "this is exactly what my life will be in 10 years" plans.. but enough room for it to change and grow without losing its original intent. i like to think of my life thus far more as a compass to this goal, instead of a carefully planned out roadtrip map ;P 5. just remember to take a deep breath... breathe 6. i agree. even working out for 20 minutes makes me feel a lot better about myself 7. i never regret mistakes because i can learn from them 8. yes! i used to be a pretty bad pessimist. but one quote that really kept me going in trying to change my out look was "i have this theory that if we're told we're bad then that's the only ideal we'll ever have"-jewel. so i was told i was shy all my life. is that what makes me who i am? if i want to i -know- i can change. 9. mmm and people will notice too __________________ And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. ~Anais Nin Last edited by anti fishstick; 09-10-2003 at 01:08 PM..