Differences in fantasies?
 

After perusing the *hot* Fantasies thread in the Sexuality forum, it strikes me that more men have fantasies about their woman being with another man in some way then women have about their man being with another woman.

Do you suppose it's that women tend to not fantasize that way?

Or that the women who do fantasize that way aren't/haven't yet contributed to that thread?

I have to say I've not fantasized about watching the hubby with another woman. I think I'd have to be incredibly drunk (and otherwise occupied) to even begin to enjoy that in any way.

But I think that also taps into my theory that men fantasize about stuff they'd never ever want/do in "real life", and women are much more likely to actually do the things they fantasize about.

Oh, gee, I'm here on a fantasy thread talking about sex. How out of character for me. :lol:

Well, I have to be frank, when I love someone I would NOT want to see them touching another woman. Perhaps it's just an incurable lack of self esteem on my part that makes me feel that way, but I think it would hurt me to see it. Now I would consider having sex with another woman while he watched. It's never happened, in fact, I've never had sex with a woman but I would absolutely consider it.

I've never had casual sex per se (I've always been at least somewhat attached), but if I were with a man I had no romantic attachment to then yes, I could probably swing that way with him.

And for the record, I do have/have had fantasies that I have no desire to act out in real life.

I have some of both. Some fantasies I think I would act upon if the situation was right and some that are just in my head and need to stay there.

I can imagine getting turned on watching my husband with another woman, but then again at the same time I would probably be very jealous.

The thing is though none of these things will ever actually happen bc my husband is very conservative in that area and would not share me or himself with anyone else.

You know, usually I'd say I also don't like to think of my man with another woman.

But here's a weird upside one, maybe you can work it out for me. A couple of months after breaking up with my last boyfriend, I started having fantasies about men that I found attractive (that I knew to some degree, or had known, or that I just saw casually in the street), and having sex with two at the same time. Usually that's not my thing as I'm a pretty loyal kind of girl, but there was a window there where I really couldn't care and just wanted to have more than one at once...at the time I remember feeling quite liberated by the fact that I didn't feel possessive. Sadly that feeling went away after a while. Anybody else had that?

little_tippler - I've had that fantasy about two at once, and in fact I acted upon it one more than one occasion. In my case, I've acted out almost all my fantasies, with just a few exceptions.

It just occurred to me that the fantasies which I generally find the hottest are the ones that I'd be most afraid of acting out on. The fear is a huge turn-on, and in the cases where I brought the fantasies to life, a big part of the enjoyment was the thrill of fear.

I've had the fantasy of being with two guys many times, but it's one of those fantasies that (and I don't know if any of you do this, as well) when I think about
them happening in reality, I imagine all the little practical matters or weird things that might make them not as hot as my imagination can make them. Like, in my head, a scenario with two guys would be scripted and they would behave just the way I want them to. In reality, this is not so likely and could lead to awkwardness and disillusionment with the whole thing. It's like, if it's a really good reliable fantasy, I'd hate to ruin it with a less enchanting reality, lol.

Don't know if any of that makes any sense...eh.

I know what you mean mixedmedia... in my case I did it more than once with the same two men, so after the first time we had a chance to talk about it and although the thrill of the unknown was slightly diminished, overall the second time was definitely better.

I just added a rather detailed fantasy to the other thread, one which probably wouldn't work out for the best in real life. However, writing it has both tired me out and turned me on - so I think it's time for me to get into bed... and since my man from last night hasn't called, it will have to be with one of my vibrators...