genuinegirly

So my friend Serpent7 was reading this thread:
and he thought it would be fun to do a poll in the Ladies Lounge. I thought: "What would they say, anyway?"
So here we go...

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"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq

"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy

maleficent

I will rarely dress in public in a way that calls attention to myself.. .I'm not totally amish, but pretty close... I really and truly hate attention... so I much prefer to be ignored...

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jRuntlets

I'm with Mal on this one. I am a t-shirt and jeans kind of girl. Not the kind of jeans that are skin tight though. I was wearing a regular t-shirt (not too loose that it's baggy and not so tight that you can see it stretching over the boobs) and some man walked up and goes, "HEY, nice tits." Um, that was completely uncalled for and rude.

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abaya

Mostly t-shirt and jeans, unless I am going out for the night (usually with ktspktsp at my side; I dress up because I like feeling sexy next to him, and I certainly don't mind *him* ogling me over dinner )... but that's more of a mood thing than anything else. Even if I am just going out with girlfriends at night (which happens pretty rarely), I like to dress sexy (e.g. tighter jeans, leather boots, and a sparkly/tighter tank top with some cleavage) because it just makes me feel "in the mood" to socialize, let loose, relax, not feel like the dorky graduate student that I usually am during the day.

EDIT: I forgot to add that recently, while working out, I've enjoyed having slightly more flattering clothes to wear. (For as long as I can remember, I've been wearing baggy soccer shorts for boys and a very loose sleeveless top, but have switched to fitted shorts and a tighter sleeveless Adidas top.) Again, I think it's a mood thing, especially since all the overflowing testosterone in the gym used to intimidate me. I find that wearing something that accentuates my muscles helps me feel more powerful and motivated in the gym, especially when running and lifting weights (when I am surrounded by sweaty, grunting men who all seem very insecure about their bodies).

Of course, the effect is somehwat diminished when I forget to shave my legs, which happens on a weekly basis.

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And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran

snowy

Yeah, definitely uncalled for, even when one is wearing something skimpy.

Generally, I wear t-shirts/jeans. But occasionally I dress up, and when I do, I dress to catch attention. I have a nice hourglass shape--big boobs, smaller waist, big booty, and long legs--so I don't feel the need to hide it. I don't dress like a skank, though--there's a fine line there I don't feel the need to cross. I dress classy.

However, if they said "Hey, nice tits"--they'd be asking for a bruising.

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If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

noodle

i really don't fit into any of those. sometimes its just the most comfortable stuff that looks "attractive". whether i want my boobs looked at will be reflected by my neckline only sometimes. regardless of if i'm trying to dress to impress or not, i'm with everyone that keeps saying, "hey, nice tits" would be asking for trouble.

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amonkie

I'm with fredweena on this one ... I have one outfit that I wear when I want to be a magnet .. other times I'm more about comfort ..

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Calling from deep in the heart, from where the eyes can't see and the ears can't hear, from where the mountain trails end and only love can go... ~~~ Three Rivers Hare Krishna

ngdawg

I'm all jeans and tshirts, sweatshirts, etc., but if I'm going to make myself decent, whether for work or going out somewhere, I'm not 'cleaning up good' to be ignored! I won't compromise comfort too much, but I won't look like I bought my things at Goodwill either. A good fitting pair of slacks, nice blouse and decent posture, combined with a small package of attitude is a great way to go through the day.

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Don't blame me. I didn't vote for either of'em.

Supple Cow

I voted for being stared at, but I by no means enjoy being stared at. BUT, I would be lying if I said I didn't dress with a purpose. If I make an effort to look particularly attractive, I would surely be concerned if nobody else at all noticed. I do have to say, though, that the statement "I enjoy being stared at" makes me a little sick to my stomach. That's really not the point.

EDIT: Where are the options for people who just like it when people notice them but don't want to have people behave [borderline] inappropriately toward them?

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"I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."
(Michael Jordan)

cellophanedeity

Perhaps "actively noticed" would be a better term for it, but yes, I do like being looked at when I feel sexy.

I tend to be the same as the other ladies here, and mostly wear jeans and t shirts, but even then I like being noticed.

Of course there are inappropriate things, like my friends boyfriend who told me once, after a good twenty minutes of conversation "So, you know I'm looking down your shirt, right?" -_- Yes, I was in a bathingsuit, yes, you were sitting on the diving board when I was in the pool, and yes, I sort of don't mind that, but the bluntness was more offensive than the act. Oh well...

onodrim

Generally speaking I'm not bothered at all by being "checked out." On days when I feel like I look pretty frumpy and I get that kind of attention, it's a huge ego booster. On days when I make the effort to be dressed up and look extra cute/sexy, then again it's an positive affirmation of one's sexiness which is always good. But of course that doesn't mean that men should go around staring at whoever they choose. There's a huge difference between making your interest and appreciation known and being full out creepy. Plus some women are more comfortable than others being "checked out," and her body language will pretty much tell you where she stands on that one. So in short, I like it as long as it's done tastefully, but not everyone will, so use discretion.

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"The world is so exquisite with so much love and moral depth, that there is no reason to deceive ourselves with pretty stories for which there’s little good evidence. Far better it seems to me, in our vulnerability, is to look death in the eye and to be grateful every day for the brief but magnificent opportunity that life provides"
-Carl Sagan

Sage

I generally try to shoot for somewhere in-between Paris Hilton and Maggie Gillenhall

It's a broad target

But do I like to look good? you betcha! It's all for Martel tho... once, I walked around downtown Asheville in a shirt that was more than just a little see-through with nothing on underneath... not becaue I wanted to be leered at (which did happen) but because it drove Martel up the wall (in a sexual, "wanna take you home and have sex on the living room floor because you're so damned sexy" kinda way!)!

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Plummie

I agree with what Supple Cow said. I like to be "actively noticed" but not stared at in a weird way. There is a respectable way to let a woman know she's looking good.

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Kim

little_tippler

When I feel good about myself, yes I like men to look. It's an ego boost. I don't like ogling though, or crude comments. I will usually answer back to those, rudely! In Portugal though you get more of the rude ones who leer than the nice sort of compliments. It's pretty neanderthal down here lol.

Once I was wearing a short skirt and shirt with ties at the front, walking down a busy street, and I got smacked in the bottom by a guy passing by on his motorbike! I was so angry I must have screamed every swear word I know, and then invented some also.

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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918

Grasshopper Green

I too enjoy being noticed, but not blatantly stared/leered at. I get a lot of that at work (although I have NO idea why, my work uniform is about as unsexy and unfashionable as it gets) and I don't appreciate it at all. I don't get the chance to dress up much anymore, but when I do and I get noticed, that is an ego booster.

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"They say that patriotism is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings; steal a little and they throw you in jail, steal a lot and they make you king"

Formerly Medusa

Sultana

I am also with Supple Cow. I've worked hard for what I have, and I don't mind being...appreciated, which is different from being drooled over.

Also, I go for comfort as well, but I don't sacrifice fashion to be comfortable. It takes a bit of effort, but it's nice to know that I look good whether going out to a special dinner, or out for pizza and a soda, or to the grocery store. I refuse to keep anything in my closet that doesn't fit, or is uncomfortable, or doesn't flatter me.

Can I tell you how many times I've run into old friends or whomever at the grocery story or some similar place? Nice to know I'm never too schlubby, at least my clothes...can't help if I'm work-weary, or hair floppy, or whatever. I just control what I can, and don't fret about the rest.

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"Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath.
At night, the ice weasels come." -

Matt Groening

My goal? To fulfill my potential.

astrahl

I prefer being looked at than ignored, and when I'm particularly well dressed for work or just out, I enjoy the compliment of being looked at.

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Maybe Maybe...
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JustJess

Yep - I'm the "notice me, but don't abuse the privilege of it fucko" category.

I have boobs, everyone says so. So if I'm accenting what anyone would say is my best body feature, yeah, I want someone to notice. Not everyone, not announcing to the world, just a notice here or there.

And generally, that's because I dress like a frump the rest of the time. Mmmm, sneakers and loose jeans and comfy t-shirts.

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My heart knows me better than I know myself, so I'm gonna let it do all the talkin'.

percy

Me too. I put an effort into looking good and it makes me feel good. And I do it for myself. No shortage of pride or confidence here.

Sweetpea

^^ count me in for that category

I try to dress nicely, not showing Too much.. just looking presentable.

I like to be noticed, it's nice. do i like to be stared at creepily and followed? certainly not.

But someone noticing you and saying hello, being a little flirty? yes indeed, bring it on.

I wish more women noticed me instead of men though

sweetpea

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"I am the Type of Person Who Can Get Away With A lot, Simply Because I Don't Ask Permission for the Privilege of Being Myself"

genuinegirly

So even though I started the thread for Serpent7, it took me a while to decide what my response would be. Like many of you, I found the options he chose rather... difficult to place myself in.

There are several breeds of men when it comes to manners. There's the one that states blatantly and rudely (as though there is something horribly wrong or naughty about it) that they are able to look down your shirt/bathing suit... I assume that it is also this kind that hollers loudly at you while you're walking down the street or honks or otherwise draws unnecessary attention to you.

Then there are the kind that do their best to ignore and turn bright red in the process.

Then, of course, there are the ones that I like the best. They're the ones who notice a beautiful woman, realize that you're showing a bit of skin for their gentle favor, and -- yes-- they make a comment. I'm not speaking of an intimidating, loud, obnoxious comment or cat-call. I'm talking about something very unique... something that requires an increidble amount of tact and dignity. Something that most men are incapable of - but something I have experienced a couple of times. When the passing man whispers into your ear, "You are so beautiful," then disappears in the crowd.

Now there is a compliment to be treasured.
It is not freaky. It is not a sexual advance. It is a comment. And it is one that has the ability to speed the pulse and give you a confidence you couldn't anticipate.

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"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq

"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy

Supple Cow

Uhh... I'm going to have to disagree here. I feel pretty strongly that if a man is close enough to me to whisper in my ear, I had better have invited him there. I don't think the words "tact" and "dignity" apply to a stranger who would invade my personal space, even if only for a moment. But maybe that's just because when I was a teenager, the people who would whisper in my ear in a crowd would also be the ones to cop a feel and run away before I could see who did it.

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"I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."
(Michael Jordan)

maleficent

Poetically that sounds nice - -in reality - that would not be a pleasant experience... and I'd probably be checking for my wallet... being that close is a huge invasion of personal space..

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genuinegirly

not when it's crowded anyway, and/or the walkway is narrow.
I think you'd have to experience it to understand the gesture.

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"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq

"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy

percy

That has happened to me on a few occasions (not quite a whisper but discreet to me only) with some wildly sexy men and it just floored me each time. What a turn on. What an incredible uplifting boost to the self it is also.

And genuinegirly, I understand you perfectly. Thanks for reminding me of some great memories of those instances and where I was in my life then.

genuinegirly

Percy - so glad to hear that there is another woman around here who has experienced such a gesture.
So much the more enjoyable when they're "wildly sexy" as you say!

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"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq

"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy

hunnychile

Sometimes it's more fun to dress in my usual casual way of nice jeans and a pretty sweater, but underneath, I'm wearing my low cut black lace bra with a matching thong.

That's a fun secret ready to share, if the right person wanted to be adventerous with me....

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Gilda

I voted for ignored.

I like to dress attractively, mostly professional feminine, but I do it for how it makes me feel about myself, and for Grace, not for the attention of men. My goal when in public is usually not to be noticed, which my manner of dress may sometimes conflict with. When I am noticed, however I would like the person who notices me to see that I've put some effort into looking nice. I don't know how to reconcile those two ideas except that I like how I look in heels and a skirt, and I like how it makes me feel to look that way, so that's how I dress. It doesn't give anyone liscense to be rude.

That would creep the hell out of me.

Gilda

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raeanna74

When I'm going to an to the store, or something where it's business as usual I either dress casually in jeans and a T or sweater. If I'm going to an appointment with the accountant, insurance rep, or Dr's I dress more professionally. When I go out to eat with just hubby or to a bar I will often dress for attention. I will stand in such a way as to get attention. I go out in groups so if I end up garnering a wierdo's attention I don't have to worry. I enjoy the looks from guys and frowns from the SO's that are out with their guys. I know it's bad. I'm a tease. I'm an exhibitionist and enjoy the attention.

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percy

You little slut. Just kidding. I say good for you. Glad to see your having a good time. Certainly beats being a buzzkill or a prude.