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Old 04-27-2005, 12:04 PM   #121 (permalink)
Newlywed
 
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Location: at home
I had to put this in here...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Supple Cow
EDIT: Almost forgot about the thickness. In general, the shaft is widest at the base. I've seen one that got skinnier at the base and it looked like a corndog. That was weird. I just kept thinking to myself, "He'd better get some engineers in there to stabilize that shit before it falls off."
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Old 04-27-2005, 07:07 PM   #122 (permalink)
It's All About The Ass!!
 
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Location: In a pool of mayonnaise!!
^ Ahaha wtf??!! where the hell was that taken from?

Asta!!
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Old 04-27-2005, 07:17 PM   #123 (permalink)
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You should check the Ladies Lounge more often, K-Wise. Everyone's giving their opinion on what makes a good-looking penis.
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Old 04-27-2005, 07:23 PM   #124 (permalink)
It's All About The Ass!!
 
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Location: In a pool of mayonnaise!!
Oh...well I don't go in there very often and when I do I stray away from topics with the word "Penis" in the title. I mean <font size=1>I saw Brad Pitt's dick! I wasn't tryin to see that dammit!</font>

If there are no actual dicks present I may take a gander but not much I can do though lol...my penis is my penis..I can't exchange it for another one if it happens to be one that isn't liked..Or can I?!

Asta!!
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Old 04-27-2005, 08:14 PM   #125 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gilda
The proper way to judge the aesthetic appeal of a penis is not appearence, but by how it feels and behaves when it is in one's mouth.

Last edited by MSD; 08-15-2008 at 11:45 AM..
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Old 04-28-2005, 12:00 PM   #126 (permalink)
Oh dear God he breeded
 
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HAHAHAHAHA!!!! And I didn't even have to do much diggin to find it. I think this one needs to be flagged!

Quote:
Originally Posted by K-Wise
Oh...well I don't go in there very often and when I do I stray away from topics with the word "Penis" in the title. I mean <font size=1>I saw Brad Pitt's dick! I wasn't tryin to see that dammit!</font>
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Old 04-28-2005, 02:47 PM   #127 (permalink)
It's All About The Ass!!
 
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Location: In a pool of mayonnaise!!
^ It's the truth though! lol

Asta!!
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Old 05-12-2005, 08:14 PM   #128 (permalink)
It's All About The Ass!!
 
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Location: In a pool of mayonnaise!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by theguyondacouch
I used to make catapaults using a long lincoln log, a small one as a pivot, and a small one as ammo. I spent so many afternoons shooting my freinds and family.
This NEEDS to be put here! Along with the rest of his post

Asta!!
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Old 05-13-2005, 12:21 PM   #129 (permalink)
Deja Moo
 
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Location: Olympic Peninsula, WA
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bill O'Rights
Fuck me!!! I forgot all about phredgreen's response to The_Dude's "horizontal pussy" thread. Oh...my fucking god...I never laughed so damn hard in my freakin' life. And now, I get to experience it all over again...as if anew.

Seriously...I'm laughing so hard right now, I've got literal tears rolling down my cheeks, my side hurts, and the little 18 year old HPOA of an assistant of mine, is beginning to fear for my sanity.
I just found this thread today, and when I read this one I got a visual of a BigO theme park. Nothing but slides and long lines of nekked women.
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Old 05-13-2005, 08:19 PM   #130 (permalink)
Deja Moo
 
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Location: Olympic Peninsula, WA
Another thread was raised to the top today and I so loved this one from lunchbox:


If only cool kids pee their pants, i'm james fucking dean.
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Old 05-14-2005, 12:32 AM   #131 (permalink)
Insane
 
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Location: Learning to Fly...
Quote:
Originally posted by quadro200
Great story. Please check in with us next week for a very special episode of "SaltPork's Nutsack Update." Will it still be purple? Maybe a little red? Will they have fallen off? You'll have to tune in later! Same nutsack time, same nutsack channel...
This one made me laugh...
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Old 05-17-2005, 12:48 AM   #132 (permalink)
Wicked Clown
 
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Location: House Of Horrors
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gilda
my wife is a man.
LOL...

i liked this quote...

but i think some1's wife might be pissed to read it!!!
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Old 05-18-2005, 06:37 AM   #133 (permalink)
Devoted
 
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Location: New England
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ishmal
LOL...

i liked this quote...

but i think some1's wife might be pissed to read it!!!
(pssst... FYI, Gilda is a lesbian, and so is her wife.)
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Old 05-21-2005, 08:32 PM   #134 (permalink)
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Tried to post this the day it came up in the original thread, but I guess that was the day my computer was acting strange.
Quote:
Originally Posted by skier
I like to think to myself that someone in charge of stocking shelves knows swedish and makes up disturbing sentences with the product names.
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Old 05-25-2005, 05:17 PM   #135 (permalink)
Getting Medieval on your ass
 
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From the How Do You Masturbate? thread:

Quote:
Originally Posted by RoboBlaster
It would be absolutely ego crushing to be caught spazzing naked in the fetal position.
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Old 05-27-2005, 06:02 PM   #136 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Spektr
Saying that the Wallflowers did something better than David Bowie is like saying that bashing your testicles with a meat tenderizer promotes healthy cholesterol.

Last edited by MSD; 08-15-2008 at 11:46 AM..
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Old 05-28-2005, 07:44 PM   #137 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Redgirl
OK, lets see if it works now...


Last edited by MSD; 08-15-2008 at 11:46 AM..
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Old 08-23-2005, 04:56 PM   #138 (permalink)
Wicked Clown
 
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Location: House Of Horrors
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fremen
I like fuckin' cats,
i took this COMPLETELY out of context...

but i haven't changed the text at all...

its funnier like this...
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Old 09-01-2005, 12:40 AM   #139 (permalink)
Wicked Clown
 
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Location: House Of Horrors
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flyman
...the quote that caught my attention...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Slimshaydee
this thread fucking sucks withot flyman's ass
Quote:
Originally Posted by wrkime
flyman's fucking ass?
Quote:
Originally Posted by splck
flymans ass
Quote:
Originally Posted by bernadette
flyman's ass
Quote:
Originally Posted by splck
flymans fuckin' ass

and the quote that got me goin.........

Quote:
Originally Posted by bernadette
where the fuck is that fucker flyman with his fuckin' hairy ass jpg?
Quote:
Originally Posted by silent_jay
flymans hairy fucking ass

...for your viewing pleasur....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Flyman
]FUCKIN" EH BABY.........



































you fuckin' fuckers knew i'd fuckin' do it..........fuck me......all you fuckin' talked about was my fuckin' ass,so.....fuck you........here it fuckin' is......



ha-fucking-ha...............


*i can't fucking believe you fuckin' freaks wanna see my fuckin' ass so fuckin' many times.


ever fuckin' heard of ......save fuckin' picture as.........for fucks sake.




i'm fuckin' outta here...........fuck.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rdr4evr
flymans fucking ass.
Quote:
Originally Posted by wrkime
fucking hairy ass. Nice fucking apple, Flyman.

...questions arise...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ishmal
WTF???
now who the fuck suggested Flyman get his Fuckin ass out??? you all knew he'd fucken do it!

...called out....

Quote:
Originally Posted by splck
I'll fuckin' ask you to take a fuckin' look at slimshaydee's post #12...that's who you should blame for the mention of that fucker's fucking ass.
Quote:
Originally Posted by slimshaydee
flymans fucking ass

..an admission?????

Quote:
Originally Posted by slimshaydee
Hey fucken hell man i was fucking framed!
Quote:
Originally Posted by silent_jay
flymans ass
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rdr4evr
flymans fucking ass
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tophat665
"Flyman's Hairy ass"

.....see.......

Quote:
Originally Posted by flyman
.......*like i said in another thread.........my plan is slowly starting to take shape.....*
Quote:
Originally Posted by splck
flyman posts his ass
...sounds like full blown admission too me folks...

Quote:
Originally Posted by slimshaydee
OH FUCK! I've unleashed a fucking monster!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rdr4evr
flymans fucking ass

...hehehehehe....it's working

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ishmal
this fucken thread has an unhealthy obsession with flymans fucken ass!!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flyman
it's all about the ass.

...mentioned twice here.....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fire
flyman's fucking ass- flyman's ass
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sue
flyman's got a nice fuckin arse, he does.
Quote:
Originally Posted by slimshaydee
flymans ass!

......for my own ego eh.....hehehe..

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sue
I'm just waiting to get to page fucking four so flyman can post his cute fucking ass again.

hehe!

:P


Edit: WOOT! PAGE FOUR! Post your fucking arse again flyman!
Quote:
Originally Posted by splck
flyman, your hairy fuckin' ass

...and again i say...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Flyman
haaa haaaa fucking haaaaa..........




that fuckin' ass will rule the fucking world my friends.......



*told you all........plan...........taking shape............all about the ass............*

..weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.......

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nancy
Fuck me, I fucking love your fucking ass Flyman!!!!!11!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jonsgirl
Flyman's fucking ass

a bold statement...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sticky
flyman's fucking ass

...muaahhhahahhhahhaaaaa.......

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rdr4evr
He is fucking brainwashing everyone.

...he's right you know...

Quote:
Originally Posted by splck
um, nope that would be brainwashing....flyman style....fucker...yep. that would be it alright.

so there ya' fuckin' go folks..........get over it.......it's just a hairy fuckin' ass..


for fucks sake people............


i pulled this quote from the archives of nonsense...

i bet u wished it stayed there...
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Last edited by Ishmal; 09-01-2005 at 12:44 AM..
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Old 09-01-2005, 03:47 AM   #140 (permalink)
Fly
see the links to my music?
 
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Location: Beautiful British Columbia
do you know how much work that was to make that?


and it still is.........all about the ass.
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Old 09-01-2005, 04:29 AM   #141 (permalink)
through charlatans phone
 
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Location: Northcoast
man, do those hairy globes ever get around!
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Old 09-01-2005, 02:58 PM   #142 (permalink)
With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much
 
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Location: left side of my couch, East Texas
Hehehe, not one quote from me on His Hairy Majesty!
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Old 09-01-2005, 03:07 PM   #143 (permalink)
comfortably numb...
 
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Location: upstate
kid has too much time on his hands...
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-----------------------------------------
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Old 09-04-2005, 03:24 PM   #144 (permalink)
Wicked Clown
 
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Location: House Of Horrors
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flyman
do you know how much work that was to make that?
yes i do.

because of all the quotes, i couldn't just hit the quote button on your post.

i had to type [ quote=??? ] [/ quote ] over and over again whilst copy and pasting each individual quote...

it took quite some time...
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Old 09-04-2005, 07:37 PM   #145 (permalink)
Fade out
 
Location: in love
Ishmal, that has to be the funniest thing i've read all week Thanks for taking the time and giving me a big smile and a chuckle! you rock


Sweetpea
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Old 09-05-2005, 12:22 AM   #146 (permalink)
Twitterpated
 
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Location: My own little world (also Canada)
Post more of these quotes so I don't have to scroll past Flyman's ass every time I read the last page of this thread. Not that he has a bad ass or anything, it just kind of gets in the way.
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Old 09-27-2005, 08:23 AM   #147 (permalink)
Cautiously soaring
 
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Location: exploring my new home in SF
Suave, don't hate...
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Old 10-07-2005, 01:48 PM   #148 (permalink)
Twitterpated
 
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Location: My own little world (also Canada)
It's not hate, it's inconvenience. Sometimes my ass gets in the way of things too, no doubt about that.
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Old 10-09-2005, 08:38 PM   #149 (permalink)
Getting Medieval on your ass
 
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Location: 13th century Europe
Quote:
Originally Posted by n0nsensical
Yeah woohoo! Dictionary burning party at my place! Fuck the definitions!
Yeah, this one belongs in here.
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Old 10-09-2005, 09:18 PM   #150 (permalink)
Comedian
 
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Location: Use the search button
Anyone mention this one yet?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ratbastid
Wow, dude. This is the single most embarassing thread on Tilted.

Good work, hon.
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Old 10-13-2005, 01:44 PM   #151 (permalink)
is a tiger
 
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Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
^

Where's that one from?
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Old 10-13-2005, 01:51 PM   #152 (permalink)
Devoted
 
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Donor
Location: New England
Quote:
Originally Posted by Siege
^

Where's that one from?
Assuming you meant the Ratbastid quote (pointing up hits a lot, or nothing. In my case, it is currently the only post on page 2 of the thread), it is the excellent Getting semen stains out of silk thread.
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Old 10-13-2005, 02:10 PM   #153 (permalink)
is a tiger
 
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Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redlemon
Assuming you meant the Ratbastid quote (pointing up hits a lot, or nothing. In my case, it is currently the only post on page 2 of the thread), it is the excellent Getting semen stains out of silk thread.
Yep, that's the one.

Good stuff
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Old 10-24-2005, 07:19 PM   #154 (permalink)
Minion of the scaléd ones
 
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Location: Northeast Jesusland
Quote:
Originally Posted by vermin
Good God that was horrible. I never knew a sound could sound like cat shit smells.
Regarding a David Hasselhoff song
Quote:
Originally Posted by Martian
Don Henley is a lot of things, but he's not the devil. Or maybe he is, but he's not writing songs about it anyway.
He may be on to something there.
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Old 10-29-2005, 10:09 AM   #155 (permalink)
Squid
 
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Location: USS George Washington
In a post in the TB (featured Marketa and Luba, sadly the pics are gone ) was a reply that caught my eye (even more than the girls):

Quote:
Originally Posted by vcudog
you'll receive the order of lenin for this
I thought that was in the top 5 TB replies of all time. Credit where credit is due and all that.

-Mikey
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Old 01-22-2006, 05:25 PM   #156 (permalink)
Addict
 
Location: Wherever I am!
Thought I'd revive this thread after reading this-
Quote:
Originally Posted by Strange Famous
Im not Jewish, but my father is.
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Old 01-23-2006, 07:26 AM   #157 (permalink)
Falling Angel
 
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Location: L.A. L.A. land
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hard8s
Thought I'd revive this thread after reading this-

Originally Posted by Strange Famous
Im not Jewish, but my father is.
Wull...in this case, the Hebrew (Jewish) line is passed from the Mother to the child, see?
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Old 01-31-2006, 04:48 AM   #158 (permalink)
It's a girly girl!
 
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Location: OH, USA
wow, my new favorite thread, how did i ever miss this one?
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Old 01-31-2006, 07:16 PM   #159 (permalink)
Une petite chou
 
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Location: With All Your Base
Quote:
originally posted by maleficent:
At one point I'm coughing up a lung, and he and his buddy decided that the perfect cure for that would be for me to give him a blow job...
Quote:
Originally posted by maleficent:
his girlfriend (who was also his 3rd cousin -- RED FLAG!!!)
Quote:
Originally posted by ShaniFaye:
Have any of you ever had a man that cant produce spit try to kiss you?
Oh my! The exes of the formidable Ladies of the TFP. I was rolling!
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Old 02-01-2006, 05:26 AM   #160 (permalink)
Submit to me, you know you want to
 
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Location: Lilburn, Ga
oh wow I've been quoted hehehehe YAY
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