Tooth decay and bad breath
 

Ok, I'm sure there are already topics on how to tell a friend/SO that they have bad breath. But what about bad teeth?

I have a friend, who I used to be romantically involved with, who has a problem with tooth decay (or what I assume is tooth decay). She originally had a slight brown line along her gum lining/tooth, which I assume is some sort of cavity. Obviously at that point it was pretty severe if you can see it with the naked eye. It's now about a year later and I noticed that her teeth have gotten worse and one of them is almost 50% brown(black?).

I tried mentioning that she should see a dentist because it's good to have your teeth checked, and that you can't always see a problem but a dentist can. She said her teeth were fine and was kind of hurt that I implied she had a problem...

Any soft way around this? Letting it fester will only make it worse (and a whole lot more costly)

let her know that you're worried about her health and that it could be a sign of a real problem. she shouldn't be insulted that you're concerned about her welfare.

As you've already made subtle hints that she should see a dentist which were met with offence, I do not believe there's much more you can do. Some people just aren't into self preservation period.

Maybe if you continue expressing your concern, she might open up about it, or she could get annoyed and tell you to get lost. Maybe she's frustrated about it and doesn't know what can be done to correct it. Even a good dentist can miss finding the root of a problem.

Discoloration of teeth can also be caused by some drugs, especially antibiotics. Maybe she's taking something but doesn't want/can't yet talk about it.

Or it could be some undiagnosed gastro problem like it was for me. It was years of my dentist saying something was going on in my mouth causing higher than normal decay but he never put two and two together to explain it. Now more years later, my current dentist had been saying similar things; eventually, last year he called his associate in who happended to be experienced with this and she suggested it looked like an acid reflux problem; so even though I have no other acid reflux symptoms, I had tests done and they confirmed pretty serious acid reflux up high enough into my esophagus that it definitely causes decay.

I don't know if there is a good way to approach that topic with a woman.

If it were a guy you could say, "Hey fuckface, your fucking teeth are nasty and about to fall out of your head. Go to a dentist, get some pliers or stop fucking smiling, 'cuz, really, it's fucking nasty to look at that black shit clinging to you teeth like a baby monkey to it's mother's teat."

Of course with a woman you have to be a bit more tactful. I don't even have a suggestion. Well maybe I do...How about, "You have such a pretty smile. Too bad it's being ruined by your poor dental hygiene." :)

I used to have a friend like this, and chances are she really knows there is a problem but either doesn't want to deal with it for whatever reason or just doesn't care. My friend certainly knew she had bad teeth, but she didn't have dental insurance to go get them fixed, and fixing a lot of teeth can get pretty damn expensive.

I think one of my brothers has that. It smells absolutely awful! If you're sitting in the car with him the smell leads you to believe he crapped his pants or something. I make sure he's chewing gum or has a breathmint before he's allowed near me or a car I'll be in.

Tell me about it...Kissing this girl was like having your own personal fart machine...just get her to open up her mouth. She was damn hot too...until you got within breathing range. :thumbsup:

There is no way to safely approach this.

Jokes will only get uncomfortable laughter and the truth will get the shit slapped out of you.

maybe you can send her an anonymous letter about the whole teeth thing or something. that should get her attention.

the brown line may just be staining, not necessarily a cavity.

This is really tough to broach. Honesty is the best approach. She'll be offended if you don't tell her.

She may know, but do you realize the cost of dentistry these days. Maybe she just doesn't have the money. A lot of dentist will not take payments and want everything up front.