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Old 01-17-2005, 05:43 PM   #1 (permalink)
pow!
 
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Location: NorCal
my latest dumbass move.

I sat across the table from my son’s little friend and his mom. The kid looked up at his mom and said, “I’m all full of pizza. There is no more room in my tummy.”

Teasing him, she replied, “Then I guess there’s no room in there for cake and ice cream.”

The kid looked distraught.

I chimed in, “Hey, way to go introducing bulimia at an early age.”

She looked at me blankly for an uncomfortable space in time, then laughed politely. She got the joke, but I guess I wasn’t that funny. It happens.

Later that evening, my wife took me aside. She told me that the gal I was joking with has a problem - she's bulimic.

HOW COME NOBODY TELLS ME THESE THINGS BEFORE I OPEN MY MOUTH?!
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Old 01-17-2005, 05:46 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Yikes. Sometimes there's just no way to know. Don't you wish we all had a rewind button that allowed us to go back to a certain place in time?
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Old 01-17-2005, 05:59 PM   #3 (permalink)
don't ignore this-->
 
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ouch, talk about trampling on a nerve don't you love jamming your foot in your mouth?
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Old 01-17-2005, 06:14 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Ouch. I think it'd be safe to extra nice to her for a while. But like JumpinJesus said, there's no way you could've known. A girl who used to be a really good friend of mine was talking to me one day about dancers and how often they got eating disorders to stay in form. Not remembering that she herself used to be a dancer, I started joking about it... also not realizing that was her way of subtly telling me that she was bulimic and wanted me to help. She took a slightly less subtle route after that.

I don't really know what you can do to fix this situation, it doesn't really seem like a great idea to walk up to her and say that you didn't know she was bulimic and that you're sorry, since she didn't tell you she was. But since you couldn't've known, I wouldn't beat yourself up horribly over it. It seemed like a fairly witty comment at the moment.
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Old 01-17-2005, 06:26 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Maybe it was a less-than-subtle nudge for her to pay closer attention to the way she handles food/reward behavior with her son. Agreed that it sucks to be the one to say stuff like that, but you may have done her a big favor in the long run.

Anyway, someone who's lived through a tragedy like that ought to have a sense of humor about it - otherwise they're just morose. And I speak from experience...
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Old 01-17-2005, 06:33 PM   #6 (permalink)
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smooth Clav, smooth
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Old 01-17-2005, 08:10 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Yessir, you can always count on Clavus. What's great is, if it had been anybody else, the woman wouldn't have been bulemic and she'd have found the joke witty and clever.

Thanks for another one, Clav!
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Old 01-17-2005, 08:19 PM   #8 (permalink)
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I think I just peed.
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Old 01-17-2005, 08:56 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Man that's like a kick to the nuts. Sorry dude.
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Old 01-17-2005, 09:15 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Obviously you weren't full of pizza as you still had room in your mouth for your foot... anyway, what was she eating?
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Old 01-17-2005, 09:27 PM   #11 (permalink)
pow!
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ryfo
.. anyway, what was she eating?
Nothing. She was just sort of sicking her finger way back inside her mouth...
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Old 01-17-2005, 10:19 PM   #12 (permalink)
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If only we could take back a few minutes and start over.
(I once asked a very overweight friend how Weight Watchers was going. Wasn't her that was going to it-duh)
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Old 01-17-2005, 11:05 PM   #13 (permalink)
Natalie Portman is sexy.
 
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I'm sorry, but that is hilarious.
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Old 01-17-2005, 11:08 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by clavus
Nothing. She was just sort of sicking her finger way back inside her mouth...
That's anorexics, not bulimics.

I mean, haha!
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Old 01-17-2005, 11:47 PM   #15 (permalink)
Please touch this.
 
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Got it wrong, Suave.

Oh by the way...

hahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahaha
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Old 01-18-2005, 12:16 AM   #16 (permalink)
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That's way too funny. No way you could have known so I wouldn't worry about it.
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Old 01-18-2005, 12:19 AM   #17 (permalink)
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Clavus, someone really ought to make a movie of your life.
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Old 01-18-2005, 01:10 AM   #18 (permalink)
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I would watch it!
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Old 01-18-2005, 01:16 AM   #19 (permalink)
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lol dont worry about it Clavus... it definatly sounds like something I would do haha maybe its a norcal thing :P
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Old 01-18-2005, 01:44 AM   #20 (permalink)
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clavus, how do you consistently inject such hilarity into your life? I'm sure if your life was a sitcom, there'd be a looped laugh track behind the 4th wall.
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Old 01-18-2005, 05:31 AM   #21 (permalink)
Is In Love
 
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So did you have room for cake and ice cream with your foot planted deeply in your mouth?
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Old 01-18-2005, 06:01 AM   #22 (permalink)
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I'd laugh out loud at that if I didn't already have my foot in my mouth. It's usually stuck there most of the time.

I think my problem is that my mouth moves when I think. I have to work on that.
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Old 01-18-2005, 06:30 AM   #23 (permalink)
Filling the Void.
 
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Eek, that sounds really bad. For future reference, never make weight jokes (or jokes concerning illnesses concerning weight) around most women- it makes even the most stout of women cringe.
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Old 01-18-2005, 06:42 AM   #24 (permalink)
Is In Love
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by la petite moi
Eek, that sounds really bad. For future reference, never make weight jokes (or jokes concerning illnesses concerning weight) around most women- it makes even the most stout of women cringe.
FYI... using "Stout" to describe a woman isn't a good idea either. As "stout" can mean "Bulky in figure; thickset or corpulent."
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Old 01-18-2005, 07:14 AM   #25 (permalink)
Filling the Void.
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Averett
FYI... using "Stout" to describe a woman isn't a good idea either. As "stout" can mean "Bulky in figure; thickset or corpulent."
LMAO, good point! See, I was thinking stout in character, but I'll be damned if there aren't women who would think"OMG ARE YOU SAYING I'M FAT?!" if you called them that.
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Old 01-18-2005, 08:12 AM   #26 (permalink)
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do you wear socks???? because not wearing them makes it less fuzzy when inserting your foot into your mouth.
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Old 01-18-2005, 09:39 AM   #27 (permalink)
pow!
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by onodrim
Clavus, someone really ought to make a movie of your life.
I don't know. I've seen the play...

Hey, who would play the part of "clavus"?
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Old 01-18-2005, 09:42 AM   #28 (permalink)
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Maybe Jim Carey?
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Old 01-18-2005, 10:02 AM   #29 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by clavus
I don't know. I've seen the play...

Hey, who would play the part of "clavus"?
Will Ferrell?

Supporting cast:
Lassie as your dog.
Nicole Kidman as your wife.
Generic Red plastic party cup as your toilet brush cup.
Sawzall as himself.
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Old 01-18-2005, 10:08 AM   #30 (permalink)
©
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by la petite moi
For future reference, never make weight jokes (or jokes concerning illnesses concerning weight) around most women- it makes even the most stout of women cringe.
Asking them if they skipped their medication today, is also a bad idea. (from experience)
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Old 01-18-2005, 10:54 AM   #31 (permalink)
Junkie
 
I feel compelled to palm my forehead. You could really compile all these suckers into one or a few stories and then submit em' to something along the lines of Reader's Digest, or Reader's Digest.
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Old 01-18-2005, 11:02 AM   #32 (permalink)
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Seriously buddy there is no way you could have known. She can't blame you for it. If she does she's not worth the effore being friendly to. We all have problems, we all deal with them. If she can't take it it's her problem.
There is just no way to please everybody.
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Last edited by Cervantes; 01-18-2005 at 11:05 AM..
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Old 01-18-2005, 11:30 AM   #33 (permalink)
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yikes, you are an unlucky man.
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Old 01-18-2005, 01:26 PM   #34 (permalink)
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thats the funniest, most unlucky thing ive heard in a long time. congrats
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Old 01-18-2005, 04:11 PM   #35 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Halx
Got it wrong, Suave.

Oh by the way...

hahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahaha
Damn it, you're right. I hate you.
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Old 01-18-2005, 04:28 PM   #36 (permalink)
rat
smiling doesn't hurt anymore :)
 
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bloody. fucking. genius. you sir, get rat's Grade A+ Comedy Goldmine award, undisputed.

i carry a little piece of clavus with me at all times.

|
\/
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Last edited by rat; 01-18-2005 at 04:31 PM..
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Old 01-18-2005, 08:32 PM   #37 (permalink)
pow!
 
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Location: NorCal
Quote:
Originally Posted by rat
i carry a little piece of clavus with me at all times.
That's cool. I wasn't using that piece anyway.
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Old 01-19-2005, 07:12 AM   #38 (permalink)
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open mouth, insert foot.

but needless to say you couldn't have known...
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Old 01-19-2005, 03:11 PM   #39 (permalink)
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Location: USA
funny as hell.

It's her problem if she's bulemic. If you made her aware of it by making a joke, good for you.
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Old 01-19-2005, 05:15 PM   #40 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Arroe
It's her problem if she's bulemic. If you made her aware of it by making a joke, good for you.
Just think of it as an unintentional intervention!!! Maybe this one might stick with her. Maybe she'll see that what she does could screw up her kids life too, as kids tend to follow examples. I say my man!
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