Same thing happened to me. The guy screeched to a stop and was about 4 inches from taking out my knee. I saw that I wouldn't have to dive out of the way (I did once before,) and I stopped exactly where I was, held my thumb and index finger apart to show the distance between his bumper and my leg, held my hand up, an dwiht my other hand, pointed to my leg, and to my hand. He rolled down the window and politely apologized. I politely asked him to be more careful when driving, and said that it could easily have been a little kid rather than me. He drove away from the light quite a bit slower than he approached it. I hope he learned to be mroe careful.

Course not. But if there was no incident, then it can't be anyone's fault, can it? Besides that, people make mistakes. People are emotionally fallible. People are self-centred. You'll live a longer, happier life if you allow yourself to forgive them for those things when it's something small like what happened to the topic creator.

I'm of the belief that assertiveness is taken too far to the extreme too often in our society. It's good to have, but people act like it's THE thing to be in all situations. They also don't realise there are multiple facets to assertion, not all of which are active and aggressive. It has its place, but it is a concept that is too frequently taken out of hand.

To all you macho MoFo guys who continue to use phrase like "punch his lights" or "pop a cao in him" - here is the way to deal with it. I can't believe that, even after so many poeple have posted that violence is not the answer, you guys continue to sound like wannabe gansta losers. MrSelfDestruct has the definitive way to handle this situation, and maybe you could take a lesson. Thanks for the voice of clear reason, MSD, you rock!

Pierre

I totally agree with vox_rox and MSD!! People make mistakes...and two wrongs don't make a right.

The driver failed to stop/break at appropriate times; Dualman shouldn't have spit on the guys car.

Kill them with kindness...I would have walked up to his window and calmly said, "Hey, when you are behind the wheel, driving is your first priority and concern. Pay attention next time, guy. You could've hit and killed me, or worse...a child or an innocent animal." And then I would have continued on my way...

I'm more ashamed when someone calmly chastises me rather than gets angry and yells. Calm disapproval hits home harder.

There have been a few different times in the past week that I've almost been on the receiving end of a vehicle driven by someone not paying attention, and a few of the times, when it was obviously their fault, they were pissed off at me. What I've always done in situations like this... look them in the eye, smile, and wave to them. Most of the time they don't know what the hell just happened, and I just continue on my way. Hey, it works for me :p

I'm not going to respond to all the machismo talk in the posts. The plain fact that most posters seemed to ignore is that the driver came mere inches from killing people! Everyone seems to be focusing on what happened after the "almost" accident. I don't know what my response would have been (as a female) but I sure as hell wouldn't have just spit and kept walking. I would have given the driver a angry diatribe or had one of the others I was with stand in front of the car while I wrote down the liscense plate number.

Most of you seem to think that the incident was no big deal because no one was hurt. I see it as, that could have been my husband or sister crossing the street and just like a coin toss, a 50/50 chance, nothing could have come of it (like the thread starters outcome) or they could be dead and gone from my life forever. I don't know the ideal solution but it is definately not a choice between inflaming the reckless driver or ignoring them, somewhere in between.

One of the very few times I've been ashamed in my life was last winter. I ran up to the corner grocery, shopped quickly and got back in the car. I drive like a granny in a parking lot so I backed out very slow. Just before I put the car in drive, I flipped the dash defrost/floor mix on high. Between the time I cranked the knob, put the car in drive, and started to straighten out and pull forward, my windshield had instantaniously fogged up. I almost ran into an elderly man that was crossing in front of me (I obviously couldn't see him).

It was my hubbies car that I wasn't used to (no excuse, I should have educated myself) and I had been in the store so briefly I hadn't even thought of the situation. I stopped just in time, rolled down the window and embarrassingly appologized to the poor guy. He, understandably, was pissed off and was cursing me so much he didn't even hear my words. I was only going about 5 or 6 mph., basically moving on idle. Would I have killed the man? Who knows. I very well could've, the elderly are more fragile than the young. It was not reckless driving on my part, would've been a complete accident if I'd hurt or killed the man, but I still would have been responsible for the injury or death. It was a totally unforseen situation but I still felt like an asshole. I should have waited to see what the car was going to do based on the weather before I backed out.

My point is that we all take on responsibility when we get behind the wheel of a car. Own up to that responsibility and don't abuse it. I realize this thread is about 3 mths. old but I didn't see it when it was created so I'm responding now that it's been resurrected.

Ali

I tend to just walk away shaking my head...

the reward is not worth the risk...

Vox... you are channelling my thoughts on this thread...

While I understand the animal response to leap to violence... violence never solves anything. It just begets more violence.

Everyone just needs to relax a bit more.

I've been taking martial arts for a while now, so if a situation like that comes up again, I wouldn't have a problem dropping those types of people in a heartbeat, 10x my size or not..


That is one of the most idiotic statements I have read. First I don't believe for one minute that you're taking martial arts at a decent school because the first thing you learn at a decent school is to avoid fighting becasuse some day you'll pick a fight with the wrong guy and will wind up eating pavement.

Second, taking martial arts "for a while now" qualifies you for absolutely nothing. I hate to tell you, but unless you're superman, there are plenty of people out there that have never taken martial arts that can destroy you.

Third, the martial arts are to be used to protect yourself and others from harm, NOT to go duking it out with people because you don't like their behavior. "Martial artists" who go around bragging about what a great karate man they are and picking fights give the martial arts a bad reputation, and those of us who are real martial artists do not appreciate that.



As to the original situation, spitting on the guys car was a dumbass move. First, he did not try to kill you. He's in a car, you're on foot. If he were TRYING to kill you, he would have succeeded. He slammed on the brakes, trying to AVOID killing you, which points to the fact that he made a mistake. Unless you are perfect (and the fact that your first reaction was to make another attempt at having this guy kill you by spitting on his car shows that you are far from perfect) you have no reason to go around picking fights with people just because they made a mistake.

The sooner you figure out that avoiding confrontation whenever possible is a must, the more likely it is that you will live to see retirement.

Unless the guy is actively trying to harm you, you have no business trying to goad him in to actively trying to harm you.

Since I started in the martial arts more years ago than I care to admit, I've been amazed at the number of people who seem to want to die. If you do something that you KNOW will piss someone off like spitting at them or smacktalking at them, you are taking the risk that they 1) are a better fighter than you and 2) are just as big of a jackass as you are being and will escalate the situation until one of you gets hurt.

funny. how that sounds so much like me ! :thumbsup:

This situation happens to me all the time - cars stopping far into the crosswalk as I'm crossing the street. When this happens, I usually make eye contact with the driver to make sure they see me. Sometimes I'll even get vicious and raise my eyebrows at them to communicate that, as a pedestrian, I'm unsure that they will stop in time. This is true. The next part is not.

If I don't get the response I like, I tend to turn into a ninja - you know, flip out and kill people. I once killed everyone on a bus that stopped too far into a crosswalk. That'll make them think twice about riding a bus that stops too far into a crosswalk. :thumbsup:

/end nonsensification