DJ Happy

Eh? Any idea how successful they were?

tropple

heheh.. hey, too bad about those ears, dude ;-)

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+++++++++++Boom!

jimbob

first, something which many forum members would find useful: "it's" does not mean "its", it means "it is"

now on to the usless again: no piece of paper can be folder in half then in half again as many as 7 times

Jolt

I'm the most regular person I know. First thing, every morning!

1slOwCD8

40,000 Americans are injured by toilets each year.

JumpinJesus

John Cleese's character in "A Fish Called Wanda" - Archie Leach, was taken from Cary Grant, whose real name was Archibald Leach.

James Earl Jones - one of the most recognizable voices in America (Darth Vader, "This is CNN", etc) stuttered so severely as a child that he was practically unable to speak.

When Spencer Tracy won the Academy Award for best actor in 1937, the statue was engraved with the name Dick Tracy.

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"I can normally tell how intelligent a man is by how stupid he thinks I am" - Cormac McCarthy, All The Pretty Horses

spindles

Therefore Suave is now banned from going to Finland (at least until he puts some pants on).

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who hid my keyboard's PANIC button?

combatmedicjen

Right now my underwear drawer is full of rolled t-shirts exactly 6" long. I don't need a damn dollar bill.

My kitty lived to be 20! She died less than a week after my dog passed away. He was 14. I guess we fed 'em right!

Also, an osterich's eyeball is as big as its brain. And it's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

Cableguy

or, attempt to pass the shirt through the metal posts on the headboard/footboard of any bunk bed at air force basic traning, as one properly folded t-shirt will pass between two of the posts, just touching the edges.

pottsynz

If you did, theres a good chance you'd pop your eyes out.

Suave

I had to put some on for work today anyways.

Rlyss

I just came across this at LowBrow.com:

"Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.

This made him ...

(Oh, man, this is so bad, it's good)

A super callused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

Menoman

I just felt compelled to say that this is true.


And to the person who asked if they were successful, I am not sure about that, but the reason they were called Hashashin's is well.... after every successful assassination/combat, they all went and got stoned into a drug induced stupor!

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beofotch5

racecar is a palindrome

slimpi66y

Gandhi, led his people to liberty

Jeff

A honey bee must tap two million flowers to make one pound of honey.

The world's costliest coffee, at $130 a pound , is called Kopi Luwak. It is in the droppings of a type of marsupial that eats only the very best coffee beans. Plantation workers track them and scoop their precious poop.

My favorite food is cheeseburgers.

Most men have erections every hour to hour and a half during sleep.

A human head remains conscious for about 15 to 20 seconds after it is been decapitated.

The penalty for killing a cat, 4,000 years ago in Egypt, was death.

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For those who believe in God, most of the big questions are answered. But for those of us who can't readily accept the God formula, the big answers don't remain stone-written. We adjust to new conditions and discoveries. We are pliable. Love need not be a command or faith a dictum. I am my own God. We are here to unlearn the teachings of the church, state, and our educational system. We are here to drink beer. We are here to kill war. We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us.
--Charles Bukowski

T.U.B.

The United States Navy has a gauge for measuring sea-sickness. It's called the Motion Sickness Indicator (MSI), and it's included in a craft's modeling software to ensure that the ship doesn't ride too rough. There are even charts that plot sea sickness vs. time (with sea sickness approaching zero after a couple days at sea). The MSI is determined from actual testing. That is to say, they find a bunch of college kids, strap them into a simulator, and roll them around until they puke. For, like, three days straight. They record all the different conditions that cause them to puke and use the values to calculate the MSI range.

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Amerika by Franz Kafka
“As Karl Rossman, a poor boy of sixteen who had been packed off to America by his parents because a servant girl had seduced him and got herself a child by him, stood on the liner slowly entering the harbour of New York, a sudden burst of sunshine seemed to illumine the Statue of Liberty, so that he saw it in a new light, although he had sighted it long before. The arm with the sword rose up as if newly stretched aloft, and round the figure blew the free winds of heaven.”

Glory's Sun

god my brother could win this hands down.. he'll be 18 in january..and he's already looking forward to joining tfp heh.. so when he turns 18.. I'll make sure he hits this thread :P

tspikes51

The statue of Teddy Roosevelt in London is electrified, by Roosevelt's request, so pigeons won't shit on it.

"Peas" almost rhymes with "meats." Really, approximate rhyme is an element of poetry.

In most states, if there is a domestic disturbance call, the man will automatically be arrested.

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"I'm telling you, we need to get rid of a few people or a million."
-Maddox

Cynthetiq

thank you... I keep forgetting their names and I walk past them all the time...

The 70's bands 10cc and Lovin' Spoonful all are named after the average amount of ejaculate.

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I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

kulrblind

The name "Wendy" didn't exist in the english language until the writing of the book, "Peter Pan" by J M Barrie.

Dingo2879

There are more Subway (restaurants) in the U.S. than McDonalds

eagle1

Sorry, the 10cc thing is just a myth.

As all sports fans know, the Los Angeles Dodgers were once the Brooklyn Dodgers before they left New York City for tinseltown. What you may not know, is that they acquired the nickname "Dodgers" by virtue of the fact that the residents of Brooklyn were sarcastically referred to as "trolley dodgers" by the residents of Manhattan. At the turn of the century, Brooklyn was famous for its extensive trolley system, and the arrogant Manhattanites tagged Brooklynites with this unfavorable nickname. Various attempts were made to change the name from the Dodgers to the Robins, Superbas, and the Kings, but alas, the team was stuck with Dodgers.

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"My wife is a sex object. Everytime I ask for sex, she objects."

iceburn

That Salem Witch Trial stuff? All caused by ergot poisoning. Ergot is a psylocibin[sic] fungus that affects rye grain. LSD is a derivative of ergot. The folks in Salem ate a ton of Rye bread... I can't answer why. Ennyhoo, eating ergot poisoned bread causes all sorts of vomiting, delusions, hallucinations, skin-crawling-ness. The Salem folks were all Puritans and freaked the fuck out.


http://www.uh.edu/engines/epi1037.htm

Also, Napolean's penis was "about one inch long, resembling a grape."

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... and shit.

JustDisGuy

People started saying "Bless you" when others sneezed because they believed that your soul briefly left your body immediately following a sneeze, leaving one vulnerable to possession.

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"Act as if the future of the universe depends on what you do, while laughing at yourself for thinking that your actions make any difference."

K-Wise

Crumple up some toilet paper; drop it into your toilet with the folds facing upward. The water in your toilet bowl will soak into the tp and as it does the wod will open up similar to that of a beautiful rose blooming from it's rose bud...except it's just some fuckin tp in your toilet. If you try this it is almost certain that you are extremely bored.

Asta!!

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"I love music and it's my parents fault (closing statement)." - Me..quoting myself...from when I said that...On TFP..thats here...Tilted Forum Project

It ain't goodbye, it's see ya later! I'll miss you guys! - Asta!!

MSD

When a radio fluke leads the crew of a 727 to believe that their plane is about to be shot down by Russian fighters, the ensuing nose dive to evade the expected attack can break the sound barrier. My dad was in the Air Force at a radio station when it happened (mid 1970's)

That's quite a famous myth.

ngdawg

height division=1.7933
leg division=1.7368
arm division=1.66666
(i'm 5"7.5' and to the hipbone is 37.5" so i'm a tad disproportionate)
on the other hand, many have the same size ring finger as they do shoe-if they are of average build.

Menoman

Well, technically, you didnt measure right, as you would have to be autopsied or have surgery to measure these correctly. They are the measurements from exactly at your joint with your arm extended perfectly.

But as you can see, even with slightly off measurements, your very close on each one.

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ngdawg

Hell, you didn't mentioned I had to be skinless!!!

yster

The animal poisons earlier reminded me of this one; grapes (and by natural extension raisins) are poisonous to dogs. My parents' dog loves grapes, oops.
So are "Chocolate, cocoa, onions and macadamia nuts," if Snopes is to be believed.
http://www.snopes.com/critters/crusader/raisins.asp

K-Wise

The infamous Godzilla roar is actually the sound that the old rusty gate outside of their studios would make upon opening it. I was reminded of this because I just got finished seeing <i>Godzilla Vs Space Godzilla</i> on TV.

Asta!!

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"I love music and it's my parents fault (closing statement)." - Me..quoting myself...from when I said that...On TFP..thats here...Tilted Forum Project

It ain't goodbye, it's see ya later! I'll miss you guys! - Asta!!

pan6467

Last Easter my chihuahua ate a bunch of chocolate my fiancee had left within the dog's reach. I freaked when I found all the empty wrappers and called 2-3 vets emergency #'s. All of them pretty much laughed at me and said that milk chocolate wasn't as serious as dark chocolate, because of the dilution. I was told to watch her and if che got sick to take her in.

All that happened was she had what appeared to be chocolate covered poo the next few days.

Later, I asked a friend I had graduated high school with, who is a vet and he said some dogs are more immune to the effects, Chihuahuas are an example because they come from Central and South America and probably had built up a resistance.

BUT, the poison stays in their system for the rest of their lives so the more they eat, eventually it will kill them. For a normal chihuahua to die from chocolate according to him, the dog would have to eat it's weight in Hershey's milk chocolate bars, in their lifetime, for a normal German Shepard it could only take 1-2 Hershey bars, in a lifetime.

Needles to say Dinky will never be eating anymore chocolate.

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I just love people who use the excuse "I use/do this because I LOVE the feeling/joy/happiness it brings me" and expect you to be ok with that as you watch them destroy their life blindly following. My response is, "I like to put forks in an eletrical socket, just LOVE that feeling, can't ever get enough of it, so will you let me put this copper fork in that electric socket?"

Ydde

Here's how to have 3 consecutive "because" in a setence:

"You can't start a sentence with because because because is a conjuntion"

Cynthetiq

thanks.. i've had that useless info for many many years...

and we still don't like the B&Ters.. we lump them all together into one title no.. Bridge and Tunnel people... okay. some of my best friends are B&Ters...but still.

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I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

matthew330

In any random gathering of 30 people, there is something like 90% chance that two of them will have the same birthday (can't remember the exact percent, but something unbelieveably high).

God of Thunder

Alanis Morrisette appeared in the very end of Jay & Silent Bob Strike back, AFTER she was identified in the credits.

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I reject your reality, and substitute my own

-- Adam Savage

arcane

pulp fiction is technically a disney movie. disney owns miramax, the company that produced pulp fiction.

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<Arcane> so if you banged 2000 chicks then at least one had a pen0r?

MageB420666

The moon is moving away from the earth at a rate of about one inch a year.

Alpha Centauri, the star closest to our solar system, is still 4.3 light years away.

Christopher Columbus was not a genius because he thought the world was round and everyone else thought it was flat, it was an accepted fact by that time that the world was round, Columbus was just incredibly bad at math and calculated the world to be about 8,000 nautical miles smaller in circumfrence then it really is. If America wasn't where it is, his mission would have failed because he only brought enough food for a one way trip, and his calculations showed the east coast of Asia being right about where the east coast of America is(give or take a little).

Gallileo wasn't officially forgiven and apologized to by the church for being right until sometime in the 1940s(I think it was the 1940s, but I'm probably wrong, but it was still a very long time after his death.)

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Apathy: The best outlook this side of I don't give a damn.

stonegrody

Related useless information: Alanis Morisette's "You outta know" was about Dave Coulier. Yup, Uncle Joey from Full house

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