Cyber Bullies
 

Bullies hit out over cyberspace

Children are unable to escape the mobile torment from bullies

LONDON, England -- Playground bullies have adapted their traditional tactics of punches and taunts to include hateful text messages and personalized Web sites, a UK children's charity says.

One in four children in the UK are the victims of cyber-bullying, said John Carr, Associate Director of the children's charity NCH, formerly known as the National Children's Homes.

"It's a new twist on the old pattern of bullying," he added.

The most popular form of cyber-bullying is mobile phone text messaging, which means victims can never escape the torment, he said.

"In the past, if bullies picked on you at school or on the way home, at least when you got to your bedroom there was some respite," Carr told Reuters.

There have also been cases of "hate Web sites" set up against students and sometimes teachers, Liz Carnell director of anti-bullying charity Bullying Online said.

"We have succeeded in getting a couple of these Web sites shut down. But it is worrying that they are so easy to set up in the first place," she told Reuters.

Children as young as 11 are targeted by cyber bullies and are often too afraid to talk to teachers or their parents and therefore suffer in silence, Carr said.

A third of victims do not tell anyone and if they do tell someone it is usually a school friend and not a policeman or teacher, he added.

Schools are aware of the situation and encourage children not to carry a mobile phone.

"Most schools have a policy of not allowing mobile phones to be switched on during lessons and some have even banned phones from school grounds," said a spokeswoman for the National Union of Teachers.

However, Carr says: "Teachers are powerless to fight bullying of whatever type outside the school."

Carnell advises young people not give out their e-mail or mobile phone number.

"But sadly a lot of phone bullying is when friends fall out," she said, adding that teenage girls were the most common instigators and recipients of text bullying.

Carr warns children not to suffer in silence and to "tell the mobile phone companies, try and get your number changed and tell the police."

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I've been researching sociopathology on the Internet.
Here's a story that represents a trend.
More later.

But to start the topic, I chose a distant situation.
Your comments on the larger related issues are welcome.

what the fuck is wrong with people now a days? i was a little kid not to ,ong ago, and i remember bully's but i stood up to em, and now im friends with a lot of em...but being older we all feel like dumbasses for the bullying we did...but we never even thought of taking farther then the playground.

At first I thought that I'd much rather be a victim of cyber bullying rather than the playground variety. On second thought the emotinal hurt caused by this behavior probably exceeds the actual events themselves. It is awful (not to mention cowardly) that this behavior is creeping into these avenues.

Art I'll be interested to see more on the sociopathology on the internet topic.

kids are mean. They always have been, and al;ways will be. It's part of our growth, while we learn how to deal with problems, and how to deal with people we don't like, and don't like us. I may sound like a dick for this, but turn your damn phone off at school, and don't worry about what someone says about you online. Yes, it can get annoying if some asshole sends you mean text messages, but hell, delete it, or get rid of the service

Maybe we need to look at what is causing this problem in the children to begin with and not blame it on the internet. The teachers are afraid that it is so easy to start hate websites but they aren't afraid that there are so many chilren who have the drive to start them? That's crazy. These kids must have some real issues with their own self-worth. I don't know what would be causing it, but my point is: The internet is some new strange technology for people who aren't familiar with it to blame easily.

ART: I'm glad that you are researching this issue. It has come up a few times on other threads we have been on and I have taken an interest (but am too lazy to look things up for myself).

It's inevitable. Maybe boxing lessons would help?

Don't feel sorry for the kid's being bullied.Todays kid's are too soft as it is. I'm sure it won't be long before the school boards have a long line of bullshit psychologist's to hold the kid's hands who are being bullied if they already don't.

that's not that bad

We're teaching the 10 year old that kids/people pick on whoever they can get a rise out of. If someone is messing with her, and she just gives them a blank, "whatever" look, and goes about her business, they'll move on.
I think it's working, too. A few weeks ago, she got her hair cut much shorter than it had been, and after her first day at school with it, she said all her classmates were stifling laughter, so she told them to go ahead and laugh at her for a few minutes. And then they were all over it, and nobody has said anything about it since.
I realize this is just minor teasing, but we're hoping that she'll start learning for herself(as she seems to be) that her reaction to such incidents will go a long way towards diminishing their frequency.
And if she wants a cell phone, she can damn well get a job and get her own...

Why would the bully have your cell phone number?

Some people just need a hobby.

i dont see this as a problem for the most part. You subject yourself to soo much on the internet. Hate is by far not the worst.

I suck

*edited 'cause I'm a mentalcase*

Why would an eleven year old have a cell phone?

I wonder why people accept from kids what they would never accept from adults... if you would be beaten up on a regular basis by your co-worker, you'd most likely call the police on him, or at least stop it; it's simply unacceptable. If some moron steals money from you on a daily basis, it's also unacceptable. If some idiot insults you all the time, it's unacceptable...

Yet if kids do these things, it's "part of growing up", and it "builds character". Fuck it. I've been bullied when I was young, and I still have to deal with the emotional and psychological problems. If I ever get a kid, and (s)he is bullied, you can expect some serious problems for those bullies and their parents, because *I* will not accept it. I want my kids to grow up in a loving, caring environment; I don't want them to be afraid to go outside, because some bastard kid wants to hurt them.

/rant

When I was in school a bullie would hassle me untill I stood up, and one way or another, brought them down a peg.
I guess in todays cyber world it's still the same.
Now bullied Kids need to learn hacking instead of fighting!

the big problem with that attitude is that sadly noone outside someones friends and immediate family gives a fuck about them. If my child was caught up in any sort of bullying i would expect him or her to take care of it themselves.

Perhaps its a good thing i don't have kids.

alpha phi,
interesting response!
hacking them back...
I've always urged that hacking victims need the same or better skills than our attackers.

I'd have to agree with you Loki!
dealing with bullies has made me a stronger person in the "real world"
Maybe you should have kids!!!!:D

Hmm, I guess it is time for another Columbine massacre then...

I didn't mean to say I wouldn't expect my kids to stand up for themselves. I want them to do that, and will give them the means too (martial arts or something). I just don't want my potential kids to go through what I went through just because nobody cares. I care, and that's enough.

I just wonder why kids need to be taught how to fight in order to take care of themselves. Isn't this the 21st century, the age of reason and modern thinking? You know, the time where we can solve problems by discussion and cooperation instead of brute force?

I can remember one time when I was bullied in school..
I was in fourth grade and my best friend was mad because I was becoming good friends with another girl...she started being really mean and tried to take my watch away. I slapped her right across the face....
She's the only person I've ever struck out of anger...at least on purpose...

And I agree....What's an 11 year old doing with a cell phone?

I've done stuff like this in the past. Especially had fun with the voice message home number dailing websites. Just back, then submit, and pretty soon everyone in the fucking house is pissed off at 3 AM. They never did shit about it though. Eventually I stopped because I had a pang of guilt, apologized to the people, and carried on.

People definitely need to give kids closer, positive attention and to help minimize their contact with really fucked up things. I have no fucking clue what opinions and decisions were made in my little 8-10 year old mind when all that bad shit happened to me, but now I'm hateful, violent, abusive, I have a low self-esteem, I constantly make myself feel like shit, I'm suicidal, abuse drugs every single fucking day, and generally accept that I cannot change. I know I cannot change because I will not allow myself. I don't know why I feel that way, but I know I do. I feel trapped and conflicted and I see the only way out is a bullet the dome. And now I can't even buy a fucking gun for another five fucking years thanks to the fucking psychiatric hospital and all the bullshit policies surrounding that.

I probably couldnt even kill myself anyway.

There is nothing worse for me than living. It's comforting to know that it wont be forever, if I'm unable to off myself soon enough.

Well, i would let them know that i care for them, but i would'nt personally intervene, thats all im saying.

Anyway, dragonlich, they need to be thought both how to fight and how to negotiate... and the best way for them to learn this is to learn it themeselves... because in thier future life both of these skills will come in very handy. (and besides, some people still don't know that this is the 21st century =))

LOL i remeber when i was younger and was one of the bullied ones myself , when ever i would respond back in anyway , physicaly or verblely, i would always be the one in trouble.

Basicly just taught me that you have to be smarter than the bullies, not stronger :)

fighting on the internet is like runing in the special olympics, even if you win yer still retarted

High five.

They put up websites to make fun of other kids???

If a bully has it in for me enough to put up a website devoted to me, I think I'd feel honored. Then I'd invite him to my own website www.whybully's name heresucksmyass.com

There are only two ways to deal with bullies. Either with wit or with force. Wit usually worked on the few bullies I encountered during school, but one should never be afraid to defend one's space, so sometimes it came down to force.

I had a bully in junior high. I photoshopped a couple of pictures of him having sex with various farm animals and posted them around around the school. I got in trouble for it, but Mr. Shitstain didn't bother me again.

I've only ever had one encounter with a bully that ended up in a fight. It happened during my Grade 8 year, and it was actually something that had been brooding for months before I finally was tired of dealing with his abuse. I won't say what I did next was glorious, but needless to say, in all his balistic rage, I won the fist fight that ensued. Whether it was by talent or dumb luck, I couldn't say. I will say, however, he had to leave school and go home afterwards, because he had a concussion.

I learned two things from that encounter on that day:

1) Bullies will never go away. You can't ignore them.
2) Fighting and beating a bully does wonders for your self-esteem and confidence. I was a hero too all for the rest of the year in my school. Suprisingly, even the teachers were on my side. I guess they didn't care much for the bully either.

I'm not saying you should fight a bully and teach him a lesson, but it sure as hell doesn't help sitting on your ass and taking the abuse either.

On a side note, I found out years later from the bully's former friends that he was thinking of bringing in a knife to finish the job. I'm glad his friends just laughed at him, or I might not have be talking here today.

survial of the fitest is all i can say

I find that the easiest way to stop bullies is to put up some kind of resistance against them, ignoring them doesn't work because they're usually persistant bastards.

I've only been bullied by one person in my life (other than my big brother but that's what older siblings are for :p) and after standing my ground against him he left me alone. This woulda been when I was about 11.

Some people just never learn though, I know people who think they're the best even after they've had their ass beaten into the ground several times.

Ya win some, ya lose some. I think being bullied a little when you're younger toughens you up a bit and teaches you that you don't have to take shit from jerks like that if you don't want to.

More on-topic though, I honestly can't see how abuse over the internet would upset anybody... most of the time when somebody tries to insult me on the 'net I end up laughing my ass off.