gov135

I love practical jokes. Some people really hate 'em, but they need to learn how to pull one off, and then they can join in the fun.

Don't get me wrong, I don't believe you should humiliate anyone for fun (except maybe loved ones). I just feel that we sometimes get caught up in out responsibilities and a practical joke helps relieve tension. They keep us from taking ourselves too seriously.

I wanted to start this thread to share practical joke ideas with one another. Do you have a great story about a prank? Did you ever back out of a practical joke, if so, why? Is there the ultimate practical joke that you can't wait to play?

My most famous practical joke:
Two days before April Fools day, last year. My girlfriend is a very tough girl, but is very trusting, so she tends to be a little gullible. I was getting desperate for a joke to play on my girlfriend when she called and complained about having to go to Planned Parenthood for an exam to get more birth control. Thats when the idea started to come to me...

On April the first, I fired up the old computer and pointed it to hotmail.com. I registered for the e-mail address plannedparenthood33@hotmail.com. I then composed a very official, quite lengthy notice that basically stated she would need to contribute a stool sample at her appointment. I knew full well she checked her e-mail at work and would receive it by the afternoon.

Sure enough, by the afternoon:
she had discussed it with her female coworkers, who were baffled.
she was somewhat upset and ACTUALLY called planned parenthood. The woman on the other end patiently explained that she could not have been contacted by Planned Parenthood, as they do not contact people based on confidentiality. I got the next phone call, and bluffed my way through the call. But by the time she called againh, I didn't have the heart for it.

But for a glorious four or five hours, she thought she would need to bring a stool sample to planned parenthood to receive her birth control. Better yet, she talked to coworkers about it, who were able to get a kick out of the joke when they found out as well.

So, thats it, my crowning practical joke glory.

I wanted to start this thread to share practical joke ideas with one another. Do you have a great story about a prank? Did you ever back out of a practical joke, if so, why? Is there the ultimate practical joke that you can't wait to play?

JadziaDax

I have a "boss" who I've been working with for about 5 years. We have always been playing little jokes on each other back and forth...

An example of one of the smaller jokes I played on him:
He's an avid Yankee fan. It was during the Subway Series... I had a custodian let me into his office, which I proceeded to decorate with Mets colors in balloons, streamers, and post-it notes. When he walked into his office the next morning, he didn't even know what to say.

The one joke I wish I could have gotten over on him had been cut short due to scheduling errors. Before he was promoted to VP in another building, he was the Student Activities Coordinator (when I was a class advisor - so he's always been my "boss"). He had to schedule all sorts of different activities for this "activity period" they were adding into the students' schedules. The kids got to pick different activities (sewing, board games, math club, chess club, etc.) to keep them occupied every other week. Some of the kids wanted a breakdancing club. So, he started to check into it with insurance, liability, etc.

Knowing he was under the gun timewise, I did some of the research for him. I gave him the web address of a company that specialized in teaching breakdancing. They would come and give the first lesson free, and then work out a deal with school districts. Unfortunately, the Superintendent of Schools said that everything was taking too long and cut the program out. So, no board game club, no sewing club, and no breakdancing club.

Where was the practical joke in all of this? The group didn't exist. I designed the webpage, found space for it, and put it up. The phone number for the group was a She-Male Escort service. This would have been the best practical joke ever, but unfortunately, it didn't come to fruition.

I'm working on the next one. I will get him muahahahaha.

Maveric

freeze a can of shaving cream/foam. after it's frozen use a can opener to take off the bottom. leave it in someone's desk drawer to thaw out, usually takes about thirty minutes... plan accordingly.

JStrider

well this last april fools i emailed my parents telling them this big long spiel about how i got in a car wreck on a left turn... and rolled my car and it was all totalled... it was really really great... my mom called my dad and he was tellin his friends and then she called me and i tried to lead her on but started laughing...

mom: why are you laughing?
me:APRIL FOOLS!!!!! HAHAHAHAHA
mom: stop joking really tell me if your ok
me: no mom im serious its april fools...
mom: oh... oh jeez i have to call your father...


it was so great... really freaked them out...

then i messaged one of my friends asking him to be my best man... told him that ariekitten was pregnant and we had to get married... he was all serious and called me and i told him it was a joke and we talked for a while... it was good...

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-=JStrider=-

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rockogre

This just moved to my top ten list.

This isn't a big thing and a lot of you can probably do it but we have been enjoying it. Myself and another friend have been tormenting a third friend.

(What are friends for after all?)

He wrote a small script that lets us play random wave files on her computer from either of our computers, this is at work.

One of us or the other have often been in her office when these sounds occur and she has complained to the both of us about this problem. What a suprise that we can't seem to find out what the problem is.

Hmmmm. I think that today is bullwinkle.wav day.
Bwah haa haa haa

One of my all time favorites is old but tried and true. Snapshot a friends desktop. Move all the icons from the desktop to a folder. Make the snapshot of the desktop be the current wallpaper.

Enjoy

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limited

This one i just found about about. A friend of mine accused another friend of stealing his socks. So the first friend proceded, for the next 3 years to steal a few socks. Now, he's got at least a duffle bag full. What better way to fuck with someone than to steal their socks?

bfresh

One of my favorites, is to get a long black zip tie and place it around someones drive shaft on their car. As they drive down the street it makes a loud noise (kind of like a playing card in the spokes of a bicycle but louder), they stop to check under the car to see if anything is dragging but b/c the tie is black it makes it hard to see.

Cynthetiq

I did something like the mets thing to a friend with marshmallow Peeps.. about 1400 of them... all over his desk and drawers in easter pastel glory. Got them after easter at about US$.25 a box... decorated his cublicle from top to bottom.

His subordinates helped position and place them, people came from all parts of the building because they heard about it thru the grapevine.

I think Azharen saw the whole thing...

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I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

pangavan

I have some training grenades left over from my days in the service...I pulled the pin on one and slid it back into the canister and taped the canister under my bosses desk, then tied fishing line from the grenade to his chair. Boss comes in, pulls out his chair and hears thunk...twinggg, looks down and sees a hand grenade smoking.

good thing he didnt have a weak heart

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darksparkles

haven't done any practical jokes lately ... but me and a couple of friends realized that when an egg's between being raw and hard-boiled the whites look an awful lot like jizz. i'll have to use that one sometime.

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krazykemist

Best non-technical joke was filling a friends Bronco entirely with styrofoam packaging peanuts. Had to save up at work for like 3 months but it was worth it. 8and a half hefty bags full fills a Bronco completly including glove box and under the seats.

Best technical joke is one thats repeated all the time. If you have access to someones computer at work or in an apartment when they are not home open the case and remove the cable from the floppy drive. Place a second floppy drive in the computer and connect the cable. Place it in a hard drive bay or just on the bottom of the case. The important part to remember is to put a blank disk in the drive first. When the computer boots up of course it will give the "Non System Disk Error" they will look at their floppy drive and see no disk and check the cd rom and everything. It's hilarious to watch. And since they know you know about computers they will ask you to fix it. Tell them you can bring it home and check it out or work on it when they are not there. Just remove the second drive and its fixed. The best though was when a friend had me take it home and i "fixed" it, he came over and saw it was working then he to the bathroom before he left so I quickly set it up again. Next day I get another call. "The fucker's doing it again." LOL


Best joke still in planning is the one we are planning for my teacher/boss. We plan on turning his office into a gay disco somewhat resembling the Blue Oyster Bar from the Police Academy movies. Disco balls, leather clad blow up dolls, chip-n-dales calendars the whole nine yards. Were also working on rigging the stereo so that when he opens the door and turns on the light it starts playing "It's Raining Men" it will be excellent if we can manage to get it all done in time.

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rsl12

maveric sez:
--------------
freeze a can of shaving cream/foam. after it's frozen use a can opener to take off the bottom. leave it in someone's desk drawer to thaw out, usually takes about thirty minutes... plan accordingly.
--------------

I don't get it. why not just open someone's drawer and spray a can of shaving cream inside?


EDIT: ah ah ah i get it. so that it will look like bukakke out of someone's mouth, right?

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Slims

Only a couple come to mind now, although I have done much, much more when I was younger:

To the old geezer who is always bitching about his lawn: We poisoned strips of grass across it. It wasn't just dead, it was barren. He tried to get grass to grow for months. Eventually, since we used so much salt and grass killer, most of the grass on his lawn started to die after the concoction that we poured started to spread.

We had a macho asshole for a leader at scout camp one year, who happenned to be pretty regular. We greased up the toilet seat and when he plopped down (in his direct macho way) he slid right off and onto the piss covered floor.

For my physics teacher, we connected opposite poles of a van de graph generator to his door and the doorframe, then left the door adjar in the morning. When he walked in, he was shocked so bad he almost passed out.

I will probably think of some of the good better jokes I have played on people in a little while.

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"Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill

"All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T.E. Lawrence

Nappa

This was a good one I concocted once among the dorm rooms....though it is kinda gross.

First get a large tray, like a platter, and then piss on it, covering the whole surface. Next, put it in the refigerator until the urine is completely frozen. Then, after choosing a victim, slide the frozen urine sheet under their door at night. When they wake up, there's a defrosted puddle of piss in their doorway. Leaves most people baffled.

Slims

yeah, my roomate has a similar idea for a trebuchet or potato cannon, but w/a frozen ball of piss.

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"Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill

"All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T.E. Lawrence

FuddMan

frozen ball of piss...excellent

arael

Prob heard this one before... but change someone's word auto correct function and watch them freak.

Jeff

I think flour is amusing. We went to a dorm one night and lined flour across the bottom of the door. Than we took our portable fan and blew all the flour into the dorm room. Everybody was in bed, and when they woke the next morning there was fine layer of powder on everything in the room.

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For those who believe in God, most of the big questions are answered. But for those of us who can't readily accept the God formula, the big answers don't remain stone-written. We adjust to new conditions and discoveries. We are pliable. Love need not be a command or faith a dictum. I am my own God. We are here to unlearn the teachings of the church, state, and our educational system. We are here to drink beer. We are here to kill war. We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us.
--Charles Bukowski

mew

shove confettie or sparkly sprinkles into a persons car air vents. Set the settings for high and for the ones that aim for the face and voila! lol my friends still finding confetti and sprikles 2 years later!BWAHAHAHAH~!

krwlz

nice mew, very nice...

gibber71

I guess this is a practical joke but I like to think of it as revenge.I used to have bible thumpers living next to me that were just anal.The wife would cut her precious grass 4 times a week and bitch at me cuz I wouldn't do the same.Fuck that. I cut my grass when it need's it.

Anyways, one day me and a friend got loaded and decided to do something about the neighbours beautiful grass. So we mixed bleach, some sort of pesticide and whatever else and made ice cubes with them. Lot's of ice cubes. At the right time we stumbled into their backyard and tried diligently to scatter them as best we could. The next week was hot and the neighbours lawn had tons of little white spots all over it. They moved about six months later.

djflish

Its not much of a practical joke, but its funny none-the-less.
Use a screwdriver or knife and pry of the 'm' and 'n' keys of a co-workers keyboard and swap them round.
Simple, but effective!

Another good one is to change the Autocorrect options in MS Word so, for example, change 'the' to 'nipples'.
Your mates sentences will be filled with the word nipples and they wont have a clue why!
You can also set it so one word will change into a whole new sentence!

__________________
Europes two great narcotics, Alcohol and Christianity.
I know which one I prefer.

platypus

In college I worked as a physics lab assistant which gave me full run of the lab and goodies locker. I loved playing mad scientist.

Ammonium tri-iodide is a highly volatile contact explosive. When wet, it is fairly safe to handle. When dry, however, just looking at it can make it go boom.

Somehow this stuff found its way onto toilet seats, door jambs, pants zippers, baseballs (catch!).

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Out the 10Base-T, through the router, down the T1, over the leased line, off the bridge, past the firewall...nothing but Net.

grayman

I gave my little brother a huge wrapped t.v. box for christmas one year. Inside was a ton of packing peanuts and a loaded beartrap. That was the funniest e.r. visit ever.

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That's right - I'm a guy in a suit eating a Blizzard. F U.

grayman

O.K., really the best one I have is stealing my Dad's remote control in October and giving it to him for Christmas. It's even funnier if you know my Dad.

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That's right - I'm a guy in a suit eating a Blizzard. F U.

bundy

back in high school i had friends who were deciding on what to do as a final departing joke to the school.

at one point they wanted to lightly electrify one of the urinals. so that when a boy was relieving himself against it he would get a shock.

this of course is extremely dangerous.

thank god they decided against that one.

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Ohayo!!!

laxative

always wanted to put on gloves etc, collect poison ivy, put it in a blender, pour result in a spray bottle with water, and spray the shit all over everything somebody owns.

or spray it on the toilet paper roll in the girls' bathroom (guys have little use for tp in a bar bathroom) at your favorite bar.

fear of catching poison ivy myself, and the labor intensiveness of it all, has so far kept me from trying it out.

merkerguitars

Ok this is sort of a mean joke.

First you need to get an old tricycle or a big wheel.

Next buy a my buddy or similar life size doll.

Then you tie it hands to the handlebars with fishing string

After that you tie his feet to the pedals.

Then you drill a hole in its head and fill it with ketchup.

Then you roll the thing into a busy street and blam! Looks like a bad accident....good way to scare the shit outta some people.

Heres another good one get some tinfoil and make a tightly packed brick of baby power. Stick some semi high explosive in the end and blow it up....powder everywhere. Actually had a friend do it in a downtown area of a big city.....

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TIO

The best one I've ever pulled off was powdered milk in a guy's bedsheets, after he'd been a genuine arsehole to a friend of ours. He reeked of sour milk for about a week!

At the Physics labs, there's a popular game that involves charging up a nice big capacitor, and throwing it to the next person through the door...if they're dumb enough to catch it, they get quite a buzz!

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Strewth

Halx

A couple weeks ago while we were filming a little video where I tied up and spanked the hell out of a model named Violet, we ordered pizza for lunch. Well, when the pizza guy showed up, Violet was still tied up an naked. We wanted to lay Violet down in the hallway so just her upper body was visible from the front door when we opened the door for the pizza guy. I would then drag her slowly away while the Pizza guy stared in bemusement... but we decided we didn't want to have the police called on us.

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Phaenx

=O

<img src="http://laer.nu/captions/group3.php?text=We+put+our+penis%27+in+Phaenx's+mouth+and+took+a+picture">

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"I went shopping last night at like 1am. The place was empty and this old woman just making polite conversation said to me, 'where is everyone??' I replied, 'In bed, same place you and I should be!' Took me ten minutes to figure out why she gave me a dirty look." --Some guy

maddog30

at a place i once worked there was 1 guy who always left his keys on the lunch table so one day i put them under an upturned coffee mug that was on the table, concequently he couldnt find his keys that arfternoon so took works old f100 home, on the way home the f100 run out of fuel he then had to walk home & get some help to get more fuel, the next morninghis keys were still under the mug which i removed & his keys appered

this was just ment to stuff him around a bit as i thought the mug would have been looked under, it turned out better than planned but it also caused some trouble which would of got me sacked so i never owned up to it & i left a few months later

twotimesadingo

A friend and I once went to the seashore and fed hundreds of seaguls rice and alkaseltzer a few hours before the annual Memorial Day parade...

As bands and floats were marching done the street, birds were exploding above them...
Closest thing I've ever seen to mass hysteria. My friend and I got it all on video, too. Fucking great

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I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and voice of reason.
I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices, son.
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lurkette

My sister remapped everyone's keyboards in her department for April Fool's day.

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"If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."

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MSD

Change the autocorrect on the word processor to replace the person's name their Boss' name with "Satan." Simple but good. Also, replace properly spelled word with slight misspellings.

Jim Kata

I told someone how to blow up a toilet in high school. He did it. Almost killed someone. If no one was there it would have been really cool...but since someone could have died i totally regret it.

And one time I was going to a friends house, and there was a lawn umbrella in the middle of the street stuck in a sewer cap...my friend pulled up to it in his truck and thought he would be cool to pick it up and act like he was jousting, but little did he know someone smeared the shaft with shit. It was hilarious.

Also did the whole ex-lax in the chocolate milk thing to the friend I mentioned above. He was in the toilet for a day. Every time I called his dad was like "Ummm...I think he just RAN back to the bathroom." I told him the next day. He was pissed for a second and then laughed the rest of the time.

bluearmy

The last place I worked at we had a lad who was a bit on the dim side to say the least. His car was an old banger and easy to get into so a few of us took the opportunity of opening his car and sharing the porno mags he had under his seat by displaying them on the dash-board.

That wasn't the best part, when he found out he went mad and reported the fact to a supervisor that someone had been into his car. The supervisor was a female and he promptly marched her outside to see for herself. Realising that the porno's where still on display he then tried to change his mind about reporting the incident and tried to move the supervisor away from the car.

All this happened in front of about forty-warehouse men who had all stopped work to cheer and laugh at the poor lad who had turned red in the face. It was quite possibly the most comical thing I have ever seen.

Troublebot

Back in college this extremely uptight girl I worked with had he desk "just so," including the centerpeice of her desk a gumball machine full of gumballs. It was one of those you could set to just give gumballs or make you pay for them. Well, she didn't like the rest of us much, so she made us pay for them.

She left early one night and I got bored, so I started fiddling around with the machine and got the gumballs out. I put them in a container and put the container in her desk. Didn't take one gumball.

Well, she comes in the next day, sees the empty gumball machine and expects a big wad of change from all us suckers. She opens the machine up and... nothing. So, needless to say, she's pissed and everyone thinks it's pretty funny.

That next night, she's refilled the gumball machine and everyone wants me to do it again. I do. Again, no gumballs are taken, just put in a container and left in her desk.

Well, I'm there the next day when she comes in and sees all her gumballs gone. She went ballistic. Threw the machine across the room and almost hit someone walking through the door.

I guess she went to our boss with the whole, "I guess I can't have nice things around here" speech. I admitted to the whole thing, showed her the gumballs, got her flowers and even put the machine back together as best I could. "Apology not accepted," was all she would say.

But her nickname was "Gumball" from that day forward.

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crow_daw

Go over to a friends house really late at night, whilst they sleep, and sneak in. Take plastic wrap and tape it securely to their bedroom door. All the way up and down it if possible. Then go into their kitchen and start banging shit around really hard so they think they're being robbed. When they get up to charge out the door, they'll run into the plastic wrap. Hilarity ensues.

Side note: I'd probably pick a friend that doesn't own guns.

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Cynthetiq

one time we had a friend who wore hearing aids in both ears... we all were hanging out and we all started lowering our voices... he kept adjusting his aids to continue hearing the conversation. We did it until he pushed them all the way up... and then we started talking in loud voices.

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I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.