Super hero fights the injustice of the boot -or- another moron about to go to jail - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

spectre · 09-17-2003, 06:30 PM

Some of you have been asking for stories that aren't so heavy or down, so, here ya go.

LINK
<hr>
Superhero Frees Cars from the Clamp

Sept 17 (Reuters) - He wears a baby-blue spandex jumpsuit and shiny gold panties, gloves, cape, boots and goggles. He wields a giant, metal-cutting circular power saw.

Who is Angle Grinder Man?

He is Britain's self-styled "first wheel-clamp and speed camera vigilante cum subversive superhero philanthropist entertainer type person." That's who.

For those not familiar with industrial machine tools, an angle grinder is the saw best suited to cutting through plates of steel, such as, say, the wheel clamps that authorities use to immobilize illegally parked cars in London.

And Angle Grinder Man offers his "free clamp-removal service" to "all good, decent law-unabiding people" who would rather fight back than pay to have their cars released.

All a clamped motorist has to do is call AGM's hotline and out comes the roadside rescue superhero to saw through the brace and release the car.

British newspapers love him. Taxi drivers are talking about him. And apparently he is for real.

His Web Site shows him, sparks a-flying, carrying out an act of apparent criminal damage on a clamp to "liberate" a red saloon car on a London street.

He advertises his hotline at his Web Site, anglegrinderman.co.uk. Since the press latched on to him, his voicemail box has been full.

His tips: "You will need a petrol-driven, 5,000 revolutions-per-minute angle grinder and a 300mm diameter metal cutting disc. It is dangerous to use a diamond-tipped or similar slotted cutting disc on metal. Always use a solid one."

Also: better to saw off clamps attached by private contractors than those placed by actual police, who can arrest you.

Angle Grinder Man says his actions are a political protest against "the arrogant contempt that politicians hold for the people who put them in power."

But police say it is no joke. Even private clamp owners can press charges.

"What might seem a light-hearted gesture to some would be considered criminal damage to others," a spokesman for Scotland Yard said. "Any act of deliberate vandalism would be acted on by the police."

<hr>

numberfive · 09-17-2003, 07:16 PM

LOL!

That is too funny. This guy is great.

Quote:

1. First and foremost: call your friendly neighbourhood A.G.M. on: 07984-121043
-Pros:
Totally free service.
You get to meet the great man himself.
Possibility of being filmed and included in ?Angle Grinder Man-the Movie?
Receive free badge and automatic enrolment in ?the little superheros club?.
-Cons:
Er.can?t think of any right now.

More hilarious quotes from the "Testimonials" part of his site:

Quote:

"He is one crazy mother-fucker. When I am in his hood, we sometimes get through 10 bowls of corn-pops a night."
-Snoop Doggy Dogg.

"I want his children....but not him."
-Beyonce Knowles

"Ven I am out in L.A. driving ze Hummer, alvays I am zinking zat I vish zat my power-tool was being as big as his."
-Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Batman976 · 09-17-2003, 07:24 PM

Oh man, I totally want to be in the little superheros club. That would be just too cool.

anleja · 09-17-2003, 07:26 PM

I wish I had one of those tools while my friend's car got clamped at a Dunkin' Donuts when we went to Chicago a year ago.

anleja · 09-17-2003, 07:30 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by spectre
Also: better to saw off clamps attached by private contractors than those placed by actual police, who can arrest you.

<hr>

I have a feeling this guy is speaking from experience.

Kaos · 09-17-2003, 08:03 PM

I remember when some guy was arrested for walking down the streets putting money into parking meters for cars who's time was about to expire.

God Bless these superheros

Hard8s · 09-17-2003, 08:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Kaos
I remember when some guy was arrested for walking down the streets putting money into parking meters for cars who's time was about to expire.

God Bless these superheros

Yeah Mr. Twister in Santa Cruz. He still does it every now and then too! Still see bumper sticker that say " Mr. Twister feed my meter!"

Fremen · 09-17-2003, 08:41 PM

Where was this guy when Homer needed him?

http://www.upnsanfrancisco.com/micro...ason9/0901.asp

Quote:

"The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson" 4F22 Original Airdate:
9/21/97
New York City to Homer Simpson: Drop dead! When Barney steals Homer's car and leaves it illegally parked between the Twin Towers, Homer and his family are forced to go to the Big Apple to retrieve it. Homer confesses that he has hated New York ever since a bad experience there as a young man, but Marge and the kids are excited to check the city out. Once there, Homer heads downtown to get the car while the others check out the sites. Homer finds that his car has been fitted with a boot by the police, who have also papered his windshield with piles of parking tickets. Enraged when he misses his chance to talk with the cop responsible for the boot, Homer drives off with the thing still stuck on his car, tearing up the pavement all along Broadway. Homer uses a pile driver to break the boot, but winds up breaking much of his car in the process. After tracking down Marge and the kids and loading them into the ripped-up car, Homer speeds away from New York City, vowing never to return.

bundy · 09-17-2003, 11:55 PM

this is brilliant.
i think there should be more people like this around.
i know i can always count on the local kids in my area to blow up the speed cameras on the main road.
but if only they could be trained to help out folks who have been plagued by the nasty nasty wheel clamps.

Quote:

Originally posted by Kaos
God Bless these superheros

here here. i agree.
great story, thanks spec.

GakFace · 09-18-2003, 12:00 AM

Wow, this guy kicks ass!!!

Btw.. about Mr. Twister, how did he get arrrested? He simply bought Parking Time. If they arrested him for that, the they can arrest anyone who parks in a space where there is still time on the meter. How the hell did he get arrested?

09-17-2003, 06:30 PM	#1 (permalink)
spectre Junkie	Super hero fights the injustice of the boot -or- another moron about to go to jail Some of you have been asking for stories that aren't so heavy or down, so, here ya go. LINK <hr> Superhero Frees Cars from the Clamp Sept 17 (Reuters) - He wears a baby-blue spandex jumpsuit and shiny gold panties, gloves, cape, boots and goggles. He wields a giant, metal-cutting circular power saw. Who is Angle Grinder Man? He is Britain's self-styled "first wheel-clamp and speed camera vigilante cum subversive superhero philanthropist entertainer type person." That's who. For those not familiar with industrial machine tools, an angle grinder is the saw best suited to cutting through plates of steel, such as, say, the wheel clamps that authorities use to immobilize illegally parked cars in London. And Angle Grinder Man offers his "free clamp-removal service" to "all good, decent law-unabiding people" who would rather fight back than pay to have their cars released. All a clamped motorist has to do is call AGM's hotline and out comes the roadside rescue superhero to saw through the brace and release the car. British newspapers love him. Taxi drivers are talking about him. And apparently he is for real. His Web Site shows him, sparks a-flying, carrying out an act of apparent criminal damage on a clamp to "liberate" a red saloon car on a London street. He advertises his hotline at his Web Site, anglegrinderman.co.uk. Since the press latched on to him, his voicemail box has been full. His tips: "You will need a petrol-driven, 5,000 revolutions-per-minute angle grinder and a 300mm diameter metal cutting disc. It is dangerous to use a diamond-tipped or similar slotted cutting disc on metal. Always use a solid one." Also: better to saw off clamps attached by private contractors than those placed by actual police, who can arrest you. Angle Grinder Man says his actions are a political protest against "the arrogant contempt that politicians hold for the people who put them in power." But police say it is no joke. Even private clamp owners can press charges. "What might seem a light-hearted gesture to some would be considered criminal damage to others," a spokesman for Scotland Yard said. "Any act of deliberate vandalism would be acted on by the police." <hr> __________________ "Fuck these chains No goddamn slave I will be different" ~ Machine Head

09-17-2003, 07:24 PM	#3 (permalink)
Batman976 is you wicked? Location: I live in a giant bucket.	Oh man, I totally want to be in the little superheros club. That would be just too cool. __________________ The following statement is true. The preceding statement was false.

09-18-2003, 12:00 AM	#10 (permalink)
GakFace Go Ninja, Go Ninja Go!! Location: IN, USA	Wow, this guy kicks ass!!! Btw.. about Mr. Twister, how did he get arrrested? He simply bought Parking Time. If they arrested him for that, the they can arrest anyone who parks in a space where there is still time on the meter. How the hell did he get arrested? __________________ RoboBlaster: Welcome to the club! Not that I'm in the club. And there really isn'a a club in the first place. But if there was a club and if I was in it, I would definitely welcome you to it.

09-17-2003, 07:26 PM	#4 (permalink)
anleja disconnected Location: ignoreland	I wish I had one of those tools while my friend's car got clamped at a Dunkin' Donuts when we went to Chicago a year ago.

09-17-2003, 08:03 PM	#6 (permalink)
Kaos Ssssssssss Location: Ontario	I remember when some guy was arrested for walking down the streets putting money into parking meters for cars who's time was about to expire. God Bless these superheros