dumbest person i ever met
 

This is not a joke, although its pretty funny and irratating as all hell. I go to the market first thing this morning for a few things and when i get out to my car, no keys. There they are hanging in the ignition glistening in the morning sun. Now im in a bad mood. I call AAA. This oaf climbs out of a tow truck that could pull up the titanic, carrying a bag that reads door kit, walks up to me and says" KEYS INSIDE?" My first thought was no ya dip shit i just wanted to see if you could open it, i was bored and i wanted to put you to the challenge. I calmly said "yes". His next question went like this..."Do you have another set of keys?" Wow, I had to bit my lip, "not with me.".....On my way home i couldnt help but think OMG what if this guy breeds? I'm done venting.:confused:

That's some funny stuff. Probably not at the time, but now...yeah, that'd be funny.

How about a trucker that got his rig stuck under a bridge? A patrolman pulls up and said: you get your truck stuck?

The trucker simply replied: nope. I was delivering that overpass and I ran out of gas.


There are alot of stupid people, just realise you'll have to meet and endure your share of it. No solace, no comforting words. The world's an irritating place :)

It's not that bad. This guy is only doing his job. I'm sure that there have been times when he's been dispatched out to a car for keys being locked inside and it turns out they really need a jump start. I'm twice as sure that he's gotten out to people, asked them "do you have a spare set of keys", and then watched them slap themselves on the forehead.

Besides, he was probably thinking the same thing about you. After all, you did manage to lock your keys inside of your car. That doesn't exactly reflect well on you.

Re: dumbest person i ever met
 

Ummmm..... as stupid as you might think he is, he might be judging how stupid (I don't actually like that word) _you_ are. For example, a lot of people carry spare keys on the car chassis, either wired to it or in a magnetic box. People have been known to do this and then forget and call Triple A when they lock themselves out. This guy may not be a mental giant, but I'll bet he's seen it all.

I worked at a pizza place. The phone rang. I told the blonde chick beside me it was for her. She picked it up and said, "Hello?" Then she looked confused, held the phone to her chest and said, "I thought you said it was for me."

I didnt think about him probably seeing the vast majority of idiots out there. personally i would not forget that i had a spare set of keys hidden on my vehicle. i pay for AAA service for the "accidents that occur in day to day life. I was just floored when he asked me if the keys were inside. could have been worse.. could have been a convertable with the top down and called him.

It's like the old line at any computer service place...first question: is the computer plugged in?
For most people, it's a stupid question. But just the other day I got called out to turn some guy's printer on for him.

had two of those in one day.....

First i was at the mall buying a Hockey Stick...you know, about 5 feet long right? When she was ringing me out, cashier asks...."You want a bag for that?" And she definitely wasnt joking...

Then on the way out, theres a lady and her son (maybe 10 yrs old) standing in front of the elevator, pushing the button over and over saying, "I wonder why its not coming up?" The funny part is there was a BIG FUCKING SIGN TAPED TO THE ELEVATOR DOOR that read "OUT OF SERVICE"

Sorry but I'm in stiches here. :lol:

In NSW we have the NRMA come to help.

It's affectionately known as No Real Mechanic Available.

He is using the same logic that the people who put "do not insert this into any oriface" on their curling iron.

Yeah the guy isn't really stupid.. Computer Techies are taught to start with the basics.... Is your monitor turned on? Is it plugged in? That might sound horribly stupid, but it saves a LOT of trouble in the long run.

wow, im a cashier...and this lady always comes in and asks for clean money...wow...clean money..hmm....i've never heard of that...

she's so stupid too...


there's this other guy, he comes in daily, and buys a jar of instant coffee....
everyday...since i've worked there he did that...

one day he came in, and my boss was standing next to me

he comes up and says
"Do you guys sell coffee here?"

my boss looks at him...

and says

"yeah, its back in food where you always get it from"

omg...when he left...everyone around us were laughing...


it doesnt seem as funny now...but it was at the time.... :P

"I was at my sister's house the other day and saw their Playstation 2, I want one now... *conversation progresses* So I plug the PS2 into my computer and then into the TV right? And then Gameboy games work on it?"

That's when I looked around the room hoping that someone had left a steel baseball bat with a nail sticking out of it nearby...

This reminds me of the guy who wasn't so much upset he locked his keys in the car, but the thing that made it worse was there was rain in the forecast and the windows were down.

Not on topic, but I haven't seen the 'ChuckUFarley' thing in a long time...best I remember it something like chuck you farley and you whole famn damly, go backoff in your own jackyard....

Okay back to topic, Gakface is right, when I started training to work at Dell computers phone support center the first thing we were always told to ask is "Is it plugged in and is the power switched on"....funny thing, that was more often than not the problem.....
and yes the old story about the woman calling in and saying the cup holder on her computer is broken and we need to come out and replace it is a true story. I was even asked why his wireless internet connection didn't work after he went out and bought "the wireless thing"?
Maybe it's because the wireless router doesn't work unless you already have internet service with an ISP, you shit-for-brains...oops sorry...
Ever try to walk an 80 year old woman through trying to reseat the soundcard in her computer because it may have become partially dislodged during shipping causing no sound? or talking to a 15 year old stoned out of his mind during a party when his parents are out of town because he crashed his dads new computer and he only has one day to get it working again before he comes back home...conversation goes something like this..
me: thank you for calling dell computers, how may I help you?
kid: is this the dell dude from tv (while all his friends are laughing like jackasses in the background and loud hiphop music playing)
me: yes it is, dude...did you get your dell?
kid: yeah, i was on the net and downloaded some cool game and now the computer is locked up. you only got one day to fix it.
me: did you try to turn it off and then back on again (reboot)?
kid: yeah, but when i turn it back on it still is on the same screen
me: what screen is that?
kid: hold on i have to get another beer.....its the one that says please wait while installing strip poker
me: where are you turing the computer off and on from, up on the screen or the big computer itself?
To make a long story short...he was turning the monitor on and off instead of the computer. I ended up getting him rebooted and the game uninstalled....while his girlfriend was telling him in the background to get off the phone cause they are smoking a bowl without him.

maybe it was "standard" questions that had to ask.

As a former tow truck driver that's exactly right. Used to happen about every 40-50th lock out. I think people get frazzeled and forget they made a copy for their purse/wallet. Besides it's a quick $20.

I drove 70 kms(at a $1.50 a km both ways plus service call fee) to plug a guys fridge in once. He insisted when I was talking to him on the phone that was the first thing he checked and "what do you think I am, an idiot!?"

I do now :D

It really is sad. A lot of the day-to-day work I do is support work for the shared and dedicated web hosting services my company offers. You should see some of these people--people CHALLENGED by the rigors of Windows XP--trying to deal with stuff like FTP and CGI scripts. Geezo.

But what happens a lot (and sounds like in this case) is they make up their mind in advance what's happened, however nonsensical that is, and anything else you suggest is WRONG, no matter how many times you've seen it or how clear the cause-and-effect is to you. And they'll say stupid things and tell stupid lies because they're RIGHT and you're WRONG (and probably DUMB and a JERK, too). Which makes it all the sweeter to show them the proverbial plug lying on the proverbial floor, two proverbial feet from the proverbial power outlet. :D

This wasn't so much stoopid as it was funny.
I use dto be in management at a grocery store, at he end of the each night the night crew "faces" up the store. Aparently after working all night on guy is not hearing too clearly. When a women asked him where the thumbtacks were he asked "Which kind, the ones you push in with with your thumb or bang in with a hammer?".... the humour being in the fact she asked for TAMPAX.

jeff foxworthy has a stand up called 'stupid people'

you should get it.


"i got a flat tire once, and was sitting on the side of the road, a guy stops, gets out of his truck, comes up to me, looks at the flat, then looks at me and says, 'flat tire'.

Nope. I was driving around and the other 3 tires just swelled up on me.

Without missing a beat he said 'the heat will do that ya know'"
lol