EventHorizon

I went to my first funeral today and it was a moving experience to say the least. We mourned the death of one of the victims of the shooting of some airmen by what was presumed to be a deranged Afghani pilot. I'm not sure if that was the exact story or not, but regardless, i know this guy's son and its strange how terrible things have to happen to the nicest people. of course it was a military funeral and he was buried on the Academy grounds since he taught here. I was really surprised about how little external grief the family showed but at the same time I have never had that eerie feeling when a 3-star gets on one knee to the wife of the deceased and speaks to her. I have also never seen the bikers with flags before either but they showed up to the funeral as well, even though i think Westboro Baptist folk would have to be quite insane to want to crash a funeral with 4000+ hormone bag college kids itching for combat and the 20 or so bikers that showed up.

what the most moving funeral TFP has ever been to? ever had a run-in with the westboro baptist people? what about some personal philosophies for helping a friend who's dad just died? please discuss...

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Originally Posted by canuckguy Pretty simple really, do your own thing as long as it does not fuck with anyone's enjoyment of life.

noodle

Oooooh, one of my favorite things to talk about to totally freak people out about.
I can give you one a day for a month... but I'll share just a few for a week maybe.
I also have the freak show stories, if you like.
But two weeks ago, I went to a Catholic funeral, which are not my favorites because I don't get a lot of the tradition, being not of that faith. For the first time in a long time, the service was actually about the kid. The priest spoke about the child like he really knew him. Family members got up and spoke. The church was crammed. A local high school had let the entire Varsity and JV lacrosse squad out of school 45 minutes away for this funeral because the kiddo was their mascot and tossed the coin at the beginning of all of their since November, despite his being 12 years old. People talked and laughed about him, shared stories and tears.
And a swim coach stood up and sang with an acoustic guitar. The song sounded familiar and we all dried our eyes a bit and kept trying to figure out what song it was...
Every challenge along the way
With courage I will face
I will battle every day
To claim my rightful place

Come with me, the time is right
There's no better team
Arm in arm we'll win the fight
It's always been our dream...


POKEMON, gotta catch 'em all!!!

Let me tell you, it was one of the most awesome funeral moments ever.

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Fremen

Sorry to hear about your friend's dad, EH.

I was by and large ok with going to funerals, until my friend in highschool was killed and the funeral home made him look unlike what he looked like in life.
I had three hard funerals under my belt by the time I was 11.
My dad's, a grandfather, and a great-grandfather. Both the grandfathers were suicide by gun, and my dad fell from the top of a church he was building.

Anyway, my friend flipped his truck when we were in high school.
He was a pretty skinny guy, but when I went to the viewing, his face was all bloated up like a soccer ball. Didn't look anything like him.
I vowed not to view the bodies at any more funerals.
Of course, I broke the vow a few years later at one of my favorite cousin's funeral. He had had a car accident on his way back from picking up his 1 year old granddaughter in West Texas.
Both were killed and they were buried in the same casket.

Unfortunately, our white trash side came out at the graveyard.
An ex-wife of his showed up drunk and started fighting with various family members.
Geez. Rednecks, can't take 'em any where.

MeltedMetalGlob

Some friends of mine lost their 10 year old son in an accident back in 1996.

A child's funeral has got to be the worst, ever.

It even beats the time I had to attend three funerals in a month, two of them within three days of each other (three elderly family members' hearts pretty much gave out.)

I gotta find a more uplifting thread to post in. It's Friday, dammit.

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dlish

yeah i need to liven this place up


a few days ago i attended Osama Bin ladens Funeral. Luckily, the US Navy was located in the Arabian Sea, and i was able to pay my respects for a full islamic funeral onboard the ship before they 'eased' him into the sea. rest in peace brother.


in all seriousness, im no good with funerals. even funerals of people i dont know.

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telekinetic

The most moving funeral I've been to was also military. A good friend of mine, a kid in my boy scout troop, 3 years younger than me, became a Marine. His Humvee was blown up by an IED in Fallujah and all 3 occupants were killed. He was 20. The funeral was in Arlington. It was just me, my parents and sister, his Mom and brother (our families were close), and a dozen other of relatives. 21 gun salute, flag presentation on one knee, the whole works. I'd been to Arlington once before to gawk at the tomb of the unknown soldier and tour around looking for old graves. Never again. If I go back, it will only be to visit his grave.

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twisted no more

Poetry

I went to, and assisted in arranging, a family member's suicide funeral a couple years ago.

I found that it's very different, going to a funeral of someone whose dying was expected versus whose dying was a complete accident and unexpected, and someone who purposefully died.

Standing there watching her husband crying. How is he ever going to get over that his wife left him, that there was nothing he could do to make her happy, make her life worth living? Knowing that the plan for them growing old together... she abandoned. It wasn't his fault, there was nothing more he could do that hadn't already been done, but try telling him that.

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BadNick

The most moving funerals that I've been to are when friends and family step up and reminisce about the life of the deceased, giving touching examples of personal experiences with the deceased. As already mentioned above, this brings out tears as well as happiness. As much as I hate funerals, this type of funeral ceremony makes me glad to be able to celebrate the person's life.

I was fortunate to have participated in such ceremonies for my mother-in-law and my father-in-law, as well as a couple of close friends who died way too prematurely at a relatively young age.

I've not posted in any thread about the O/UBL subject so I should know better and just keep my mouth shut but since I just had a few high % beers for lunch and that always loosens my tongue, physical and virtual, I'll add that I plan to "pay my respects" every time I piss in the ocean in the future. If the OP (or management) is offended by this statement in reply to dlish'ous post please let me know and I'll edit it out -- or wield the ban hammer.

Grasshopper Green

I've never really been moved at a funeral; any potential moving moments have been overshadowed by something (other than general grief). I've only attended 5 in my life, so maybe I haven't had proper opportunity. The one thing I've learned for certain is there better not be a viewing at mine. Viewings are awful.

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Formerly Medusa

chinese crested

Some of the most moving funerals I have attended have been decorated with dandelions and daisies - the grieving tears and tales from those who love them, who would lay them to rest in the vault at the edge of the garden pond. Pity the poor hamster, he has such a short life, and its hard watching the children with their wee procession - cardboard box held with the dignity of a Kings funeral - death is familiar from an early age isnt it.
When I go to a funeral for one of 'the animal lot', we pay our respects, the dog comes as he is a rescue, and he represents the animals the late person has helped. At a friends, he had been ill for years although he was a tad younger than me - it was a true celebration of his life. It was touching that his sister carried him in - the last song ws Shirley Bassey I think Johnny chose the play list himself. I just wish we had taken his pig to the service. He would have laughed at that - and after all, it was his last big day after all.