The Duck

I heard on the radio today a fanatical Christian announcing that it is STATED in the Bible that the Armeggedon will be this year on 22nd May (surprisingly could not give a time). However the thing that really got me leaking a bit of Urine was the fact she said for 2000 yrs they had it all wrong as they thought it was 2012 but forgot that actually in time scale 0 to 1 is infact 1 year. OK.... I can see her logic Thank you for putting us all right..and GOD himself.. So my question: If all these fanatics ACTUALLY believe this ..why would she waste nearly an hour of her last 16 days arguing with a radio DJ about wether he should cancel his June holliday ??? Should she not be out beating herself with Witchazel and covering herself in chicken blood ???

The_Jazz

The Mayans were the ones who originally predicted 2012, but most scholars think that was just because they got tired of charting out their calendar. At the time, they'd looked ahead for eclipses, etc. for several hundred years and it was a waste of resources to go further.

You might find this interesting. 2012 End Of The World - End Of The World 2012 Predictions

__________________
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo

dlish

i wouldnt take the bible as any sort of authority on numbers. if you google 'numerical errors in the bible' you'll come up with a long long list of pages that show you how the mere copying of information was badly done.

as for the end of the world that this woman is talking about, ill be willing to bet her my house that its not coming. but if im wrong, ill pay her on the 23rd.

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

Poetry

From the billboards around LA, it looks like it might just be the Rapture.

If so, I'm heading over to Orange County and stealing a Z4 or two.

__________________
"You know what? Fuck the moon! He controls our water and our women. I've had enough!"

Baraka_Guru

Even so, it's not necessarily going to be some overblown "End of the World" scenario like some crappy Hollywood flick staring a guy who was once pretty cool but then started doing lame rom-coms and is now trying to make up for it but is merely overcompensating.

No.

Another way to look at it (if you're into predictions of predictors, etc.) is that it's not merely the end of the world as in the world ends—kaput! But rather it's the end of the world as we know it.

People talk about New World Order or whatever. Well, what if the prediction was that humanity would one day (say, sometime in 2012) reach a pinnacle of communication technology and willingness to the extent that it would mark a turning point in human events across the globe. Yes, we're that close to such an event. Some might argue we're already there technologically and all that's missing is the will.

The Dalai Lama dedicates most of his career to this kind of thing. Other humanists do too. There are many influential people who want to work towards a universal humanism, and maybe, just maybe, this 2012 prediction is just that. The turning point to a better world under a better humanity.

Not some lava-filled, earthshaking, tsunami-crushing, alien-invading nuclear event.

Or maybe it will mark the beginning of a long nuclear winter. Who knows?



Winter is coming.....

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

The Duck

See (what I find the most amusing part of all that is) Ok they Mayans had the calender ..Granted ok..lets take that as fact!!! But the Christians ...not only predicted that the weather would get a bit crappy ..but there would be Wars... ok ..no biggy there were wars 2000 yrs ago there have been wars since time began. I am absolutely certain that a couple of T rex's got pissed off with a Tyranasaurus or two and made a somewhat "SOCIAL" divide... BUT to predict RUMOURS of wars ... PMSL I can do that for every local derby football match.IN FACT >>>me being a stand in for god just for the moment.... I THE DUCK with all that is good and holy and do not apease my WRATH on pain of death Predict that if one football team lose against another this weekend there will be WAR!!! >>>or handbags at 10 paces one or the other !

Baraka_Guru

The Bible predicts things much like the writers of horoscopes do.

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

The Duck

As an aside... (and I do hope you find this as funny as I did once it is in text rather than verbal) The Pure Genius of the DJ said to the woman (who had ranted and raved at him ..quite aggresively during the interview) "Thank you for your insight, would you be willing to come back on air at sometime so we can continue this discussion?" She replied YES of course I would. When?" "lets say about JULY" ... " Yes no problem" ????"

Baraka_Guru

There is, of course, a lot of disagreement about how to interpret these things. For example, there's this guy, who's built an entire career doing this exact thing (over and over again):

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

The Duck

Why is he not out with all the other evangelists GETTING LAID ...hes only got 16 days left !!!

Baraka_Guru

No, no... Jesus is coming.

But, honestly, I'd sooner believe Cizin or Cacoch or Alom or somebody were coming. Maybe all of them and more.

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

dlish

i remember Smeth posting this once.

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

The Duck

Funniest shit i have heard in years !!!!!

Grasshopper Green

I will be at Disneyland on May 22nd. I hope Jesus lets me ride Pirates of the Caribbean before He decides to turn the Earth into a raging inferno (or whatever the hell is supposed to happen).

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"They say that patriotism is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings; steal a little and they throw you in jail, steal a lot and they make you king"

Formerly Medusa

KirStang

My brothers will still be visiting me on the 22nd for my graduation. Aw-right! Riding out the apocalypse with my broskies

__________________

The_Jazz

Oh, that's the Sunday before I have to go to Arkansas twice in the same week. Huh.

__________________
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo

roachboy

going to arkansas twice in one week is a sign of the apocalypse.

__________________
a gramophone its corrugated trumpet silver handle
spinning dog. such faithfulness it hear

it make you sick.

-kamau brathwaite

uncle phil

i will probably be golfing in lexington, virginia on the 22nd of may...

deux-deux de mayo?

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

spindles

Thanks, Ned.

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who hid my keyboard's PANIC button?

Baraka_Guru

You'd think Hay-seuss would give us more of a heads up, eh?

I dunno, like maybe his visage appearing more often in cloud formations, on people's toast, in people's latte foam....

Something! Give us a sign or something!

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

Ourcrazymodern?

I'll just duck & cover. My desk will protect me.

__________________
BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

Baraka_Guru

There is no desk....

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

dlish

The guy's supposed to rule for 1000 years when he's back.

long enough for you?

---------- Post added at 11:09 AM ---------- Previous post was at 11:08 AM ----------

It's aussie humour. Much much funnier than lame english humour.

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

Fremen

I'll hopefully be playing on my new iPad2 on May 21st.
It'll give me a day to appreciate it before the end.
Or, if I don't win the raffle, I can smugly laugh at the winner when the 22nd comes.

/come on, apocky-clips

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Google

MeltedMetalGlob

The 22nd, huh? Looks like I better get around to using these Radio Shack coupons...

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How's your mom, Ed?

snowy

The billboards here say that Judgment Day is the 21st. The pastors at the church I work at (Methodist) think it's hilarious.

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If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Lindy

First prize is, all expenses paid, a week in Arkansas.

Second prize is two weeks!

.

The_Jazz

Hey now. Arkansas isn't that bad. It's MUCH better than Alabama and lightyears ahead of Mississippi. I'll get to stay about 1/4 mile from the Clinton Presidential Library.

__________________
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo

Baraka_Guru

Is Arkansas like a Saskatchewan but without all the hockey and curling?

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

The_Jazz

Baraka, everyone except the tin foil hat crowd knows that Saskatchewan isn't any more real than the Yeti, chupracabra or the Pilsbury Doughboy. Arkansas is a real place.

__________________
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo

Baraka_Guru

Dude, Saskatchewan is the birthplace of Canadian universal health care. It's the reason I'm alive!

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

Tully Mars

Socialist bastards! No wonder the worlds going to end soon. Every Good US citizen knows universal health care will kill your grandparents.

__________________
I used to drink to drown my sorrows, but the damned things have learned how to swim- Frida Kahlo

Vice President Starkizzer Fan Club

Baraka_Guru

We abort all fetuses and replace them with non-English-speaking Muslim immigrants as well.

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

Ourcrazymodern?

I eat Mexicans when they look at me funny.

__________________
BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

Fremen

Ahhhh, Mexican food...

__________________
Google

dlish

i hae cousins in toronto

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

Baraka_Guru

You're welcome any time, despite your command over the English language.

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

dlish

its 4am here dude. gimme a break.

beside. my cousin not bitter spell then me.


i love tacos

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

Baraka_Guru

There are some great tacos in this city. We've got Mexicans too.

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

uncle phil

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.