Cynthetiq

A friend posted, "You know you're an asshole when you use speaker phone on the subway..."

So when you realize that you're the asshole, what was it that you were doing?

For me:
...cross the street in front of moving cars forcing them to stop and let you pass.

What about you?

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I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

bagatelle

I must be broken, because I never catch myself being an asshole. I may act assholish, but if you question me there will always be a reason to justify my behaviour.

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genuinegirly

Picking up my fluffy friends without their consent. The second the rabbit and hamsters start squirming, I feel horrible.

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"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq

"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy

jewels

get in the elevator quickly, pretending you didn't see someone about 50 feet behind you.

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We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess.
Mark Twain

Plan9

Does this thread have anything to do with Cynth's famous signature line?

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Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Scud1373

When you take the elevator to go up one floor, and you're not handicapped. As a third floor office drone, I hate this.

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THIS UNIT WILL SELF-DESTRUCT UPON TERMINATION OF TARGET

streak_56

"Its not the clothes that make you look fat..."

I've said this... because I lack the thing in my head to make me stop before I think about it... I choose my words slightly more carefully now...

Ourcrazymodern?

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BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

Redlemon

I can't think of one. In fact, I'm the guy who is most likely to not do something on the off-chance that someone else might find that offensive. So, instead of asshole... wimp?

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I can't read your signature. Sorry.

Baraka_Guru

...think that snow is a valid excuse for leaving dog shit on the small patch of grass in front of your apartment building. Double points for thinking that it somehow disappears along with the snow when it melts.

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Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

bagatelle

There are also other kinds of wimps-assholes, who get away with things, when they are too cowardly to stand behind their words and actions. They manipulate others, but don't come forward, because they are too high and mighty, and would get offended themselves, if confronted.

Not saying that you are. :P Just what comes to my mind about wimps...

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Xazy

I do not like to do this, but when I am really rushed I have.

Driving in the middle lane, when the right lane is backedup up for an exit, and cut in right at the exit at the last second. I hate people who do this, I do not allow anyone to do this, I have made people drive past the exit by not allowing them in as they fought to inch over. So when I have I feel really assholish.

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Now, a clever man would put the poison into his own goblet, because he would know that only a great fool would reach for what he was given. I am not a great fool, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you. But you must have known I was not a great fool, you would have counted on it, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me.

bagatelle

Ah, similar to what my hubby told me he did one morning. He always drives to work at the same time like some other "regulars". He was so angry at one driver, who often used to cut in front off him and then slow down to get off at the next exit, which also slowed down hubby's speed, so when the driver was passing him again next time, he forced him to drive by his side so long, he missed the exit.

He felt no remorse afterwards.

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amonkie

Make something that has both nuts and chocolate and bring it to work, and know the very very annoying person who has food allergies to both of those ingredients won't be able to eat it, but will have to listen to everyone else rave about how good it is.

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Calling from deep in the heart, from where the eyes can't see and the ears can't hear, from where the mountain trails end and only love can go... ~~~ Three Rivers Hare Krishna

Cynthetiq

that's the point. I had justification to cross in front of the cars. I was in a hurry I needed to be there now! not a moment from now, but now!

so what are you doing that may be assholish?

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I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

canuckguy

I could just let it go and pick it up and easily put it in the trash.... but catching the guy down the street letting his dog crap on my lawn and other neighbours for months now was too much. Waiting until midnight and taking said dog crap and wiping it up under the door handles of his car, his front door knob, the key holes....

I could just let it go but if felt good for 10 minutes I got my revenge then I felt guilty. I am an asshole.

bagatelle

To my family I'm an asshole, who neglects them and spends too much time in the net. There's no justification to that.

I decide to ignore some people, because I don't want to deal with them. With some people there just comes a point, when I can't stand them, but I don't necessarily let them know what's wrong, so they don't even get a chance to discuss or tell their "excuses". For starters I'm open to people and quite lenient, but if someone constantly and knowingly irks me, lies, or abuses the relationship thinking I approve something they do or say, I just may turn the switch off, when I decide they weren't really listening to who and what I am.

I'm an asshole in a sense that sometimes I poke people myself or expect them to understand my humor. But I never do pretend to be a person with a big forgiving heart either.

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Plan9

...your name is Buddha.



Cheating on someone over the Internet makes you an asshole. I mean, just suck the guy's dick. I can handle that.



Telling the truth makes you an asshole. Ignoring the truth makes you an asshole, too.



An angry uterus makes you an asshole. Letting birth control turn you into a screaming bitch? Asshole'd!



That guitar shop in Wayne's World was pretty bad, too.



Finally, being a troll makes you an asshole. A delightful, cuddly please-don't-stop asshole... but still an asshole.

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Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

bagatelle

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Bonkai

when you break-wind in an crowded elevator

Ourcrazymodern?

I love Plan9

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BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

uncle phil

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"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
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"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
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never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

KirStang

When I bone my friend's ex one week after they broke up. Go me.

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jadangel

I work in a law office. People will call me and ask for phone numbers for other attorney offices, clerks offices, probation & parole numbers, the list is endless..... Even though I could easily look up the number and give it to them, I don't....I tell them to call information or look it up in the phone book.....Does that make me an asshole? Yes.... But dammit I am not a human phone book.....wait a minute, I think they are the assholes for thinking I am........hmmm

KirStang

Consider the goodwill and professionalism that may be earned through the 5 minutes it takes to look up a phone number. No harm in saying, "Well, I'm a little busy right now, can you look it up in a phonebook?" but, "go find it yourself" (as my law supervisor frequently told me--worst professor I've ever had) does not a friend make.

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EventHorizon

this friend of mine really fucked me over once with a project for school and i got a zero on it so i took a needle and poked 1 hole in each of his condoms. i felt like an asshole afterwards. his gf never got preggo but even then i think i over reacted.

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Does Marcellus Wallace have the appearance of a female canine? Then for what reason did you attempt to copulate with him as if he were a female canine?

Quote:

Originally Posted by canuckguy Pretty simple really, do your own thing as long as it does not fuck with anyone's enjoyment of life.

jadangel

[QUOTE=KirStang;2878838]Consider the goodwill and professionalism that may be earned through the 5 minutes it takes to look up a phone number. No harm in saying, "Well, I'm a little busy right now, can you look it up in a phonebook?" but, "go find it yourself" (as my law supervisor frequently told me--worst professor I've ever had) does not a friend make.[/QUOTE


Back in the early days I was more accomodating, now not so much, like I said I know that makes me an asshole and I'm good with that.....

Strange Famous

The thing that actually infuriates it me is fucking wankers who stand on the wrong side of the escalator. It is thoughtless, rude, inconsiderate, and in the understanding of any sane court of law justifiable cause for kicking a son of a bitch straight in the nuts with a two step run up.

EVERYONE knows that you stand on the right side if you want to stand still, and the left hand side is for people who want to run or walk to go faster.

When I see some prick or selfish bitch standing side by side and blocking the way it just makes my blood boil. This genuinely should be a criminal offense and 6 weeks of hard labour would make these people think twice about their selfish, pig ignorant, arrogant, contemptable attitudes.

I genuinely am feeling angry typing this and I need to go outside and go for a walk now. Im not joking.

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"Do not tell lies, and do not do what you hate,
for all things are plain in the sight of Heaven. For nothing
hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
without being uncovered."

The Gospel of Thomas

ring

Hey! You have your old avatar, again. Nifty.
Enjoy your stroll.

biznatch

Strange, I feel almost the same way when I'm waiting behind one of those people. Minus the wanting them to go to jail part, that's a bit much.
But seriously, I consider metro hallways/moving walkways and escalators the same as highways. You should keep right if you're walking slowly or standing still, and leave the left side open for passing. I get infuriated every day at people making my hour and a half commute longer by just standing there stupidly, or taking up two "lanes."

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The_Jazz

Why should we pay to jail folks that don't understand escalators? They should just be thrown down them. Or put some where they can learn. Well, learn again. Maybe it should be in a rural or undeveloped area for maximum impact. Sort of a camp. A "re-education camp", such as it is.

How do I know I'm an asshole? I log on to TFP. [applause]

Seriously, I'm the kind of driver, that if I see you run up past a line of cars waiting to turn/exit/merge/move won't let you merge into line unless you've got your emergency lights on, in which case I'm going to assume that you're not a bigger asshole than me. I will also do whatever I can to get onboard a plane before you.

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"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo

Zeraph

Funny, StrangeF. I'm quite similar. Especially when hiking. You think ~12 seconds waiting on an escalator is bad? Try hiking for 30 minutes behind people who won't move out of the way (edit and its not just two people but a huge family of 8). Try getting past their fat asses without hurting something.

Now when they do this though I just run/charge. So far they've always moved.

Starkizzer

When I say, "Sucks to be you!" at Martian in chat when he says he made a typo somewhere in his 1100 line config file and doesn't know where.


Bwahahaha

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Frivolity, at the edge of a Moral Swamp, hears Hymn-Singing in the Distance and dons the Galoshes of Remorse. ~Edward Gorey

raging moderate

I take the last piece of whatever (pizza, cake, fruit, cookies) every single time without remorse.

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These are the good old days...



formerly Murp0434

genuinegirly

If I need to speak to someone else because the person who has taken my call has an impossible accent. I always make the mistake of asking them to speak up or speak more slowly first, which invariably gets me more upset at the fact that I can't make out a word they're trying to say.

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"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq

"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy