and when did they sound bad?

When they started playing music, but I digress. We can argue this in the F*** thread. This thread is about cleaning yourself up after taking a shit, not a band that sounds like....

roll up a couple little wads and put 'em in your ears

I used to crunch, but now I fold. It's no less effective, and wastes less paper. Unless it's one of those particularly messy events where you still get shit on the paper after 10 or 15 wipes. Then I'll just hop in the shower (assuming I'm at home, of course).

Fold. I use 3 ply and fold it twice using 3 squares. Uses less paper, cleans well and is very uniform so I know I'm clean.

I'm so confused, I don't see how you can crunch.. it sounds like wiping your ass with the petals of a rose or something.. folding seems the only way physically possible?

Now there's a thought with imaginable benefits. ...rose petals... I think I'll go out back & get some.

The Damask variety have the best petal formation (for wiping) & they are very fragrant.

http://i253.photobucket.com/albums/h...amask-rose.jpg

Fold. Totally. How can I properly gauge the paper coverage of hand or ass with a handful of irregular surface area?

And, BTW, a total +1 on Snowy's addition. Fresh wipes are key to complete butthole cleanliness; also helpful for cutting down on ass itch.

Yes! This is precisely why I use them. The witch hazel in the ones I use helps a lot.

Is ass itch the same ass monkey butt?

Um...the wipes won't help if your ass is hairless, orange, and engorged, if that's what you're asking....

Middle class 3 rd world country style is utilizing but a single square. First you poke a hole in said square. Use your fingers, then wipe your fingers with the square.

Old school joke from the Philippines my parents never tire of telling.

i refuse to believe that women go to the bathroom.


they do not..and anyone who says otherwise is just tellings fibs. no amount of convincing will lead me to believe otherwise

merlocke....:no: err.. square? what square? maybe im missing something here

Uh.. Dlish? My toilet paper is square... What the heck shape is yours? Look at one piece of tp. :)

if you read all the info about toilet habits, you'll decide that i dont use any toilet paper apparently

I do believe that dlish just admitted to being a woman.

BAZINGA!!

You crunchers are a bunch of sick fucks. How is the feces all over your hand going?

Scrunching is an Art.

Toilet Paper Origami

My uncle's hunting cabin has just an outhouse, no indoor bathroom.
There are two buckets of corncobs and a sign with instructions (for the uninitiated.)
1. Wipe with red corncob first.
2. Then use white corncob.
3. If white corncob turns brown, use another red corncob.

Lindy

"
I'm a white boy,
But my neck is red,

I spread miracle whip,
on my wonder bread

I'd think we're all obsessed if I wasn't busy inspecting my anus.

...Sear's catalog!

As noted earlier, the entire point of crunching is that it provides a *greater* barrier between hand and feces. Remember, crunches are almost certainly also using more toilet paper per wipe than folders.

Except that with folders you're clearly driving feces in one direction (in the line of the fold). Crunchers, on the hand, are spreading feces all around their ass like a Bob Ross tree painting.. all that cleanup surely ends up with feces on your hand..

Actually if you wipe (swipe) in one direction, (backwards, or forwards) you get it all in one straight line. Hence avoiding skid marks. Despite the crunched or felt toilet tissue paper. It should all be in one straight line. So if you have enough, you should not get any crap in your hands. Given this hypothesis, crunchers are prone to collecting more paper than folders.

Jesus Smeth, look what you've started, a whole new science dedicated to the toilet habits of the modern man ... this is wrong. I think ...

Jinn.... I have no idea what you're talking about. Why would crunching change how one wipes? I'm not sure what you mean by "in the line of the fold" either. Do you fold and then wipe with the edge of the fold instead of the flat surface? I doubt it, but that's how that sounds to me.