It's not possible to rape a cow in NJ - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

loquitur · 09-26-2009, 05:21 PM

Puzzled by that title? Well, check out this item:

Quote:

New Jersey police officer Robert Melia Jr. will not face criminal charges for allegedly having sex with five calves under a perfectly bizarre ruling by Judge James J. Morley. We previously discussed the case, here. Morley dismissed animal cruelty charges on the grounds that the cows may have enjoyed having sex with Melia.

Morley ruled that oral sex with cows cannot constitute animal cruelty since the cows aren’t talking and may not have been “tormented” or “puzzled” by the experience.

In a simply amazing exchange with prosecutors, Morley went into the uncertainties of man-cow relations: “If the cow had the cognitive ability to form thought and speak, would it say, ‘Where’s the milk? I’m not getting any milk,’” You are allowed to drop your coffee in amazement at this point.

Morley went on to explain that children are comforted by pacifiers and perhaps cows are equally pacified by police officers in these cases: “They [children] enjoy the act of suckling,” the judge said. “Cows may be of a different disposition.” You are allowed to throw up in disgust at this point.

Morley ignored that one cow head-butted Melia in the stomach and appeared far from happy. The prosecutor objected that the cows were “very upset” by Melia’s action and stated “I think any reasonable juror could infer that a man’s penis in the mouth of a calf is torment. It’s a crime against nature.” The problem is that New Jersey does not currently have a ban on bestiality as opposed to animal cruelty.

Morley did note “I’m not saying it’s OK. This is a legal question for me. It’s not a questions of morals. It’s not a question of hygiene. It’s not a question of how people should conduct themselves.” That is reassuring. However, since the cows can never complain about sexual abuse, Morley’s view would effectively end cruelty prosecutions absent physical injury. While “no means no,” “moo” means nothing in Morley’s court. Any defendant could use the Morley defense of “the cows enjoyed it.”

And the defendant is a police officer. Sheesh.

BadNick · 09-26-2009, 05:34 PM

ahhh, this probably explains the new item I saw on our bulletin board in work on Friday, saying something like "sex with animals now legal in NJ!"

I wonder if "Moe" knows about this? My first summer job when I was 16 was downtown Philly and Moe was an older guy who worked there. Many Mondays he would tell us of his weekend exploits over in NJ where he'd find just the right sheep and have sex. I don't know if this judge would think sheep are also OK for sex or if Moe would have to find a cow. I don't know, but Moe liked sheep.

Willravel · 09-26-2009, 06:05 PM

This begs the question: what the hell is wrong with that judge? Maybe he's also going to declare that a case isn't rape because a woman shows physical signs of arousal? Sicko.

Charlatan · 09-26-2009, 06:13 PM

OK. So it's legal to have sex with a cow. But does having sex with a calf constitute pedophilia?

bazkitcase5 · 09-26-2009, 06:39 PM

wow... just... wow...

what the crap is wrong with our society?!?!?!?

inBOIL · 09-26-2009, 07:13 PM

So you can kill a cow for the pleasure of eating it, or severely restrict a calf's movement to enhance the pleasure you get while eating it, but you can't have it suck your dick for pleasure. I hate to be the guy who defends the cow-fucker, but there's a logical disconnect here.

blahblah454 · 09-26-2009, 07:14 PM

Wow, this brings all the times we talk about sex with animals to a frightening reality.

Totally insane!

Raghnar -ITA- · 09-27-2009, 12:36 AM

Disgusting only thinking about it!

flat5 · 09-27-2009, 07:02 AM

Plan9 · 09-27-2009, 07:20 AM

"Stop playing with your food!"

ObieX · 09-27-2009, 08:16 AM

YeA! Alright! Hardcore!

Lookit those suckers go!

Zeraph · 09-27-2009, 08:33 AM

*shudders*

But yeah, I'd have to agree with the people that think its not rape. Rape is serious, and society is applying this label way too much lately. So long as the animals aren't being physically tortured/harmed, I don't see why bestiality is such a big deal (in a legal way). At least if it was legal we'd openly know who the creepy sickos were...

Nisses · 09-28-2009, 12:40 AM

New Jersey police officer Robert Melia Jr. will not face criminal charges for allegedly having sex with five calves under a perfectly bizarre ruling by Judge James J. Morley.

--> I don't see it.
They may not enjoy it - or they may? I'm no cow whisperer-, but I just don't see the animal cruelty charges here.
The judge just simply looked at the matter from a purely legal standpoint as far as I can tell.
Nothing illegal to it. And the fact that it got the media-attention, will most likely serve as enough punishment for the police officer. I doubt he'll keep his job, or any other with a public function.

bazkitcase5 · 09-28-2009, 08:21 AM

and thankfully so!

World's King · 09-28-2009, 08:23 AM

I don't see the problem... I've always been a big fan of Veal.

09-26-2009, 06:13 PM	#4 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	OK. So it's legal to have sex with a cow. But does having sex with a calf constitute pedophilia? __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

09-26-2009, 07:13 PM	#6 (permalink)
inBOIL I have eaten the slaw	So you can kill a cow for the pleasure of eating it, or severely restrict a calf's movement to enhance the pleasure you get while eating it, but you can't have it suck your dick for pleasure. I hate to be the guy who defends the cow-fucker, but there's a logical disconnect here. __________________ And you believe Bush and the liberals and divorced parents and gays and blacks and the Christian right and fossil fuels and Xbox are all to blame, meanwhile you yourselves create an ad where your kid hits you in the head with a baseball and you don't understand the message that the problem is you.

09-27-2009, 12:36 AM	#8 (permalink)
Raghnar -ITA- Tilted Location: Milan - Italy	Disgusting only thinking about it! __________________ English N00b - Please help if you have time and correct my errors

09-27-2009, 07:02 AM	#9 (permalink)
flat5 Very Insignificant Pawn Location: Amsterdam, NL	.. Last edited by flat5; 10-01-2009 at 06:11 AM..

09-27-2009, 07:20 AM	#10 (permalink)
Plan9 I Confess a Shiver	"Stop playing with your food!" __________________ *Whatever you can carry.* "You should not drink... and bake."

09-26-2009, 05:34 PM	#2 (permalink)
BadNick Riding the Ocean Spray Location: S.E. PA in U Sofa	ahhh, this probably explains the new item I saw on our bulletin board in work on Friday, saying something like "sex with animals now legal in NJ!" I wonder if "Moe" knows about this? My first summer job when I was 16 was downtown Philly and Moe was an older guy who worked there. Many Mondays he would tell us of his weekend exploits over in NJ where he'd find just the right sheep and have sex. I don't know if this judge would think sheep are also OK for sex or if Moe would have to find a cow. I don't know, but Moe liked sheep.

09-26-2009, 06:05 PM	#3 (permalink)
Willravel ... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.	This begs the question: what the hell is wrong with that judge? Maybe he's also going to declare that a case isn't rape because a woman shows physical signs of arousal? Sicko.

09-26-2009, 06:39 PM	#5 (permalink)
bazkitcase5 Crazy Location: Tupelo, MS	wow... just... wow... what the crap is wrong with our society?!?!?!?

09-26-2009, 07:14 PM	#7 (permalink)
blahblah454 Let's put a smile on that face Location: On the road...	Wow, this brings all the times we talk about sex with animals to a frightening reality. Totally insane!

09-27-2009, 08:16 AM	#11 (permalink)
ObieX Pickles Location: Shirt and Pants (NJ)	YeA! Alright! Hardcore! Lookit those suckers go! __________________ We Must Dissent.

09-27-2009, 08:33 AM	#12 (permalink)
Zeraph Banned Location: The Cosmos	shudders But yeah, I'd have to agree with the people that think its not rape. Rape is serious, and society is applying this label way too much lately. So long as the animals aren't being physically tortured/harmed, I don't see why bestiality is such a big deal (in a legal way). At least if it was legal we'd openly know who the creepy sickos were...

09-28-2009, 12:40 AM	#13 (permalink)
Nisses Shade Location: Belgium	New Jersey police officer Robert Melia Jr. will not face criminal charges for allegedly having sex with five calves under a perfectly bizarre ruling by Judge James J. Morley. --> I don't see it. They may not enjoy it - or they may? I'm no cow whisperer-, but I just don't see the animal cruelty charges here. The judge just simply looked at the matter from a purely legal standpoint as far as I can tell. Nothing illegal to it. And the fact that it got the media-attention, will most likely serve as enough punishment for the police officer. I doubt he'll keep his job, or any other with a public function. __________________ Moderation should be moderately moderated.

09-28-2009, 08:21 AM	#14 (permalink)
bazkitcase5 Crazy Location: Tupelo, MS	and thankfully so!

09-28-2009, 08:23 AM	#15 (permalink)
World's King Here Location: Denver City Denver	I don't see the problem... I've always been a big fan of Veal. __________________ heavy is the head that wears the crown