How would one become aggressive yet still not considered a jerk or asshole?
 

This is kind of relates to both work and life goals. How would one go about doing this without making people feel that way towards one's self?

Would one try and convince and sell ones idea onto the rest of the group or friends so that they will use your ideas and inputs? Thus, your ideas are used more and then would be considered aggressive at trying to put your ideas out there. Yet, at the same time is not considered that one is a di.ck.

How does one go about doing so. What is your thoughts and feeling on this subject? :thumbsup:

It is all summed up as assertiveness.

Damnit Cynthetiq. That's what I was going to say.

You're looking for assertive, not aggressive.

Speak softly and carry a big stick. ;)

And always use your manners!

^ this

That approach has worked very well for me in my professional as well as personal life. My tactics in the workplace tend to be:

1. Being overly polite (to the point of sounding silly occasionally), as well as keeping my not-so-polite comments to myself. It's been my observation that peers tend to lose a lot of respect for the hot-heads that just spew negative comments or nag the group in hopes that someone will just get fed up and let them have their way/say, even if said hothead's ideas are rock solid.

Combined with:

2. Making sure that the point/ideas I am trying to get across are well thought out, logical and (of course) make the most sense out of the options available.

Which leads me to:

3. Both in professional and life settings I will often times throw out a few ideas which are obviously flawed (to me at least) along with the concept I am actually trying to pitch. Subject at hand could range from the new project at work that I want my say in, or where a group of friends is headed that evening. This gives your audience the impression of choice which has tended to work very well for me also.

Tone of voice and body/facial language have a lot to do with how these things are taken, too. Not that your words aren't important, just that they aren't the entire thing. Many times the perception of being negative or mean or conceited, etc... is just from the way something is communicated, not the communication itself.

How many times have you been told something you already knew? Was it easier to hear when you were told with a snobby attitude or a cooperative one?

You can stick up for yourself and what you believe without seeming negative towards other people. It just takes some of us a little more effort than others. I've definitely had to "practice" that one myself. :)