The "Do you take tipping seriously?" thread

[^LJ]

I tip 15% if they did their job or a really good job. If they sucked they get nothing.

[~springrain]

People do need to remember that bad service is NOT always the fault of the server. Waiter's and Waitresses in our part of the country make on average $2.10 an hour... they count on their tips to complete their wage.

When i waited tables... we had to split a % of our tips with the bussers, and the bartenders which futher diminishes the total earnings. On top of this... before we could end our shift, there was always a certain amount of bullshit jobs that had to be completed (filling ketchup bottles, cleaning and polishing silverware, rolling napkins), of course you're not earning tips when you're busy with all of that (i know many restaurants that are run this way)...

If the kitchen staff keeps fucking up, or the bartender is slow, etc... it's not fair to penalize the server. If i experience bad service, i ask about it to find out where the "fault" lies and then act accordingly. I have been known to tip the server VERY well... but compain to the manager because of other reasons for a bad dining experience.

[guthmund]

There are exceptions to every rule but.....

I tip generously everytime I go out to eat. These folks make less than $2.50 an hour; most times their swamped with tables cause they're stupid boss can't hire any extra staff; most times they've got some real jerk-ass in the corner who thinks its fun to watch them jump for an extra buck.

Everybody has bad days. I think that by paying a little extra for the service maybe I make their day a little better. So, what's the harm?

I figure as long as they give me a cursory nod, fill up my glass once in a while and bring me my food, I don't need them to hold my hand while I eat or jump through hoops to get me an extra napkin. It seems to work too. I always get the table that I want and even though I don't ask for it, there's always a little extra attention paid to me by my waiter/waitress.

By tipping well I confident in the fact that my waiter/waitress isn't rubbing my silverware on her butt or blowing loogeys in my food.

[VirFighter]

Originally posted by Prophecy
It’s her belief that why should I tip someone that is just doing their job in the first place.

This is basically exactly how I feel.

I'm an "asshole tipper" and will freely admit to it. For someone to get a decent tip out of me they've either got to catch me in a good mood (I usually tip when I'm out with my girlfriend ) or if they give exceptional service.

I know people bitch about how a server depends on tips... well if they depend on tips then ought to have no complaints about working to get them. I'm not a total jerk, I usually leave at least a little something at restaurants unless the service is just horrible. Rarely do I go over 10% though. Pizza boys or valets usually don't get tips though, unless they go above and beyond their roles which is rare.

[YourNeverThere]

I like to tip 10 to 15% for a good the decent meal, more if it was really good. If it was bad, one cent, if it was really really really really bad then i just walk out on the whole bill and it come out of the waiters paycheack, like reverse tipping. Sometimes i get served at places that you dont tip, like the stand at a movie theatre, and the server is really great but you cant really tip them because of the line behind you and there is no tip jar, and everything.

[4thTimeLucky]

A couple of people have said that they walk out of restaurants without paying.....

@ Don't staff come after you or call the police ever?

@ Don't you feel that you are stealing from them? After all they have spent money on staff, overheads and food which you have used (even if you didn't like) without paying for.

[Prophecy]

I haven't walked out of any restaurant but if things got bad enough and the circumstances were just right I'd walk out, and no I wouldn't feel like I was stealing (but it would have to be an extreme case for me to walk out). But to answer your question, in most cases you pay at the table. So the management wouldn't know you got up and left without paying unless you made a scene or they kept a hawk eye on you.

[grayman]

I have worked in a small family style restaurant for the last seven years and I feel that it has given me a unique perspective on tipping.
1) The waitresses where I work make $3.19 an hour, not $2. I know this is still not minimum wage, but it is higher.
2) The waitresses have to pay taxes on the $3.19 and 8% of their total sales for the night. What this means is: if they make a 10% tip off a table, the last 2% is tax free. I don't know about anyone else, but I pay taxes on every penny I make.
3) Most people around here tip at least 10% and usually much more. It is not unusual for regulars to tip $3 on a $10 meal. Granted, there are some assholes who don't tip, but all the waitresses average out ahead of 8%, even the bad ones who just smoke and ignore their customers.
4) The highest paid employees where I work(and my boss pays very well for a restaurant) are all waitresses - even if they are not good waitresses.
5) The waitresses do NOT share their tips with anyone. Period. No matter what the busboys do to help(much more than they should) they never see a dime.
6) The only thing that can be wrong with your experience that is caused by the kitchen or dishwasher is a long wait, and even that is often the waitress' doing as well. It is not unusual for the waitresses at my work to take an order and then just hold onto it for 10-15 minutes before giving it to the kitchen. Add 15 minutes for the food to cook and that is a long wait. The food can't be cooked until they kitchen knows what it is.
7) If your food is cold, it is probably because it sat on the counter waiting for your waitress to take her sweet ass time getting to it.
8) If your order comes out to the table wrong, how could that possibly be anyone but the waitress' fault? Doesn't she know what you ordered? If it is not right, she shouldn't take it out. More often than not, however, the waitress writes it down wrong or the writing is illegible and the cooks have to make their best guess.
9) Many times, the waitress will accept a special order from a customer (take the ham out of the ham & bean soup, etc.) and they will pass that along to someone else to do, i.e. salad dept. or kitchen. Then, when the customer leaves, guess who gets the tip for this "special service."
10) Whenever the waitresses don't get a tip, they NEVER, EVER think that there is even a SHRED of a chance that it might be because they gave poor service. It is always because the customer is a cheapskate or an asshole or because the busboy stole the tip (they have accused every busboy of this, never proven it once). When I work the cash register, I always ask how everything was, if the customer has a complaint, I ask if they told their server and if their server made it right. Several times I have had a customer tell me that the waitress never came back to the table. Then we take money off their bill, and UNBELIEVABLY the waitress still gets a tip.
11) Tipping is a practice designed to keep servers honest. If they work hard, they get paid well. If they do not work hard, they do not get paid well (in theory), unfortunately, anymore everyone tips no matter what the level of service is. THis is the problem. If they don't need to work hard to get paid, why should they?
Sorry about the length of my rant, but this one hits close to home.

[4thTimeLucky]

Brilliant post grayman, thanks for making the effort.

(If I could tip you I would )

[ratbastid]

When I eat out, the tip is automatically there for the server to lose. They have to try pretty darned hard to lose it, too. And it doesn't take a whole lot for the tip to grow. I'll go to 20% or 25% if my socks are sufficiently knocked off by the service I've gotten.

I don't go below 15% unless I'm making a point, and then, I leave nothing. Whenever I stiff a waiter (and I've only done it a handful of times), I leave a polite but honest note saying why.

[lurkette]

I tip no matter what, unless they were downright rude or something. 10% minimum, even for crappy service. Sometimes people just have a bad day. And I try to let people know when they did a really great job or just made my day nicer. I once had a waitress who was extra special nice. She wasn't perky or fake sunny cheerful or anything, just really nice. She could kind of tell I wanted to be left alone (I was cranky and had had a bad day), so she didn't intrude, but made sure I was taken care of and gave me two desserts. So I left her a whopping huge tip.

I've never been a waitress but I know enough people who have been waitresses or waiters to know that it's a crap job and you have to put up with lots of shit from morons and rude people who think the universe revolved around them. They get paid for shit, usually, and are held responsible for EVERYTHING. It doesn't cost me that much to make sure they want to keep doing their job, first by being polite to them even when they screw up (not a doormat, just polite), and second, rewarding them monetarily when they do good work.

[Ratman]

In this part of Asia, tipping is not done in any situation (restaurant, bar, bellboys, hairsylists, etc.), and the service is usually damn god. Thank God. In the states I got really tired of everyone always holding their hand out, and those tip jars in every coffee place and fast food joint? Ridiculous.

As a restaurant manager in the States, I told my staff at every preshift meeting that they had the opportunity to give themselves a raise every time they approached a table. I also made sure that they were educated about every item on the menu. I gave them every chance to make a good living under the system we were stuck with. This led to creating many regular customers, and low employee turnover.

[tinfoil]

Why would I tip a waitress if she screws up my order, offers slow service and is rude during a slow period? Has she added any value to my meal? I think not.

My wife and my sister were both waitresses. They back me up on that. If you want my money, then don't piss me off.

As a rule I go 15%-20% depending on the bill, of course.

[Derwood]

If your service is really bad, I mean bad enough to not leave a tip, do yourself a favor and talk to the manager. That way you will probably get your meal free as well!

[greytone]

It seems like just about everything has been said on this issue, but I will add my pennies for the hell of it.

I have worked just about every job in a variety of eating establishements. I have been dishwasher, cook, waiter, and even a janitor. The system is screwed up, but it seems we are stuck with it for now.

I understand that tips are part of the cost of eating out and a large part of a waiters income. I tip well and it frequently comes down to having the correct change. I round to the nearest quarter. I start at 15% and frequently go to 20 to 25%. Outright rudeness is about the only thing that will bring less. Incompetence leads to the low end. Keep my tea full (and don't fill it with sweet tea....or syrup at some places near hear) and you can keep me very happy.

But I WILL NOT tip for counter service. That is included in the price and those people earn far more an hour than waiters. In a busy Starbucks or smoothie place, if everyone left a dollar, they could make more an hour than I do as a physician....really.

[MacGnG]

my sister is a waitress so that makes us all more incline to give a better tip for better service, thinking of her

[gibber71]

Originally posted by ARTelevision
Tipping is unfortunately a necessity, as restaurant owners and other entrepreneurs who can get away with it have a tradition of shoving onto their customers the burden of paying their employees a living wage.

I'm still laughing,...That's rich.

[Meridae'n]

Here in Australia we don't tip at all, but by some of the figures above, we pay a lot better.

I'll tip if the service is good, but i don't believe in tipping just for getting mediocre service. I'll also tip cabbies, usually cause i'm pissed...

[Opiate]

i travelled to the US when i was fairly young and the concept of tipping was alien to me. As Meri said we dont tip at all here in the land of Oz, but our waiters/waitressess get paid fairly well.

ive worked in the food and retail industry for a bit, and the minimum wage i think accross the board for a 20 year old is $13.20 which is around USD $7-8 (not sure of the exchange rate), thats the flat weekday rate and sundays get time and a half (some places may even give time and a quarter for saturdays).

i dont think ive ever tipped anyone in my lifetime, apart from the rare occurance where ive been with some friends and we didnt want to bother splittling all the notes for change.

just my 2 cents

[Jesus Pimp]

I tip when I get good service. If I forget to tip I don't really care. My girlfriend on the other hand takes tipping seriously. Who invented tipping?

[Sparhawk]

Originally posted by Meridae'n
Here in Australia we don't tip at all, but by some of the figures above, we pay a lot better.

I'll tip if the service is good, but i don't believe in tipping just for getting mediocre service. I'll also tip cabbies, usually cause i'm pissed...

In Australia pissed is good right?

[mtsgsd]

I hate the fact that establishments are allowed to under pay their wait staff because they'll get tipped anyway. A tip is supposed to be a gratuity as in an extra amount that they shouldn't be expecting. We do this for service that we feel deserves something extra. Somewhere back in history, owners were allowed to use this as an excuse to pay less. Pisses me off to have someone barely be civil to us let alone give adequate service and expect a tip. And don't get me started on the "automatic" tip that gets added.

Still. we DO tip! They can't help the way the system is set up, and they do depend on us to make a living. We do however tip as little or as much as we feel they deserve. We'll even go over %20 if we like them.

Something else we do. If they did a good job, as in what they are supposed to do, plus just a little extra, we call the manager over and make sure he/she knows what a good employee they have. As my wife likes to point out, everybody will complain about someone, but almost nobody will praise when it's deserved. Give it a try sometime.

[denim]

In Australia pissed is good right?

"Drunk", IIRC.

[Cynthetiq]

I was at Angels restaurant in Manhattan last night... impeccable service. Very attentive staff from bus boys to waitstaff...great pasta place.

left him a 20% tip on our appetizers and desert (we didn't have entrees.)

[warrrreagl]

If you get tired of waiting for the server to bring your ticket at the end of the meal, do as I do. The quickest way to get your check is to get up and head for the door.

[rs8001]

I usually overtip IMO. Not just servers but the person who cuts my hair etc. I think it comes from when I was a paper boy; just a $1 extra a lot of people gave me when I came to collect made a huge difference. I don't think I've ever left nothing. Of course, it varies on the service. If the service isn't perfect because the place is packed I can understand that. I love when my drink doesn't run out and I don't have to wait a long time for the bill.

Check out www.stainedapron.com. It is a interesting, often funny, and sometimes gross sight from the server's point of view.

[madcap_hijinx]

one time i left a restroom token for a tip for shitty service.

[losfp]

Another Aussie here.. I admit the whole concept was foreign to me until I checked out Reservoir Dogs Excellent rant by Steve Buscemi's character, and one whose opinions I share. I may leave a little something extra if the service is exceptional, but it's not considered mandatory here. Heck, I work hard too, but you don't see me getting tipped for putting together an exceptional HTML page, fer'instance

And for those interested... that scene:

Mr. Pink: I don't tip.

Nice Guy Eddie: You don't tip?

Mr. Pink: I don't believe in tipping.

Nice Guy Eddie: You don't believe in tipping?

Mr. Blue: You know what these chicks make? They make shit.

Mr. Pink: Don't give me that. She don't make enough money, she can quit.

Nice Guy Eddie: I don't even know a fucking Jew who'd have the balls to say that. Let me just get this straight. You don't ever tip, huh?

Mr. Pink: I don't tip because society says I have to. Alright, I mean I'll tip if somebody really deserves a tip. If they really put forth the effort, I'll give them a little something extra. But I mean this tipping automatically--it's for the birds. I mean, as far as I'm concerned they're just doing their job.

Mr. Blue: This girl was nice.

Mr. Pink: She was OK. She was nothing special.

Mr. Blue: What's special? Take you in the back and suck your dick?

Nice Guy Eddie: I'd go over 12 percent for that.

Mr. Pink: I ordered coffee, right. Now we've been here a long fucking time and she only filled my cup 3 times. When I order coffee I want it filled 6 times.

Mr. Blonde: 6 times. Well what if she's too fucking busy?

Mr. Pink: The words too fucking busy shouldn't be in a waitress' vocabulary.

Nice Guy Eddie: Excuse me, Mr. Pink, but the last fucking thing you need is another cup of coffee.

Mr. Pink: Jesus Christ! I mean, these ladies aren't starving to death. They make minimum wage. I used to work for minimum wage and when I did I wasn't lucky enough to have a job that society deemed tip-worthy.

Mr. Blue: You don't care that they're counting on your tips to live?

Mr. Pink: You know what this is? It's the world's smallest violin playing just for the waitresses.

Mr. White: You don't have any idea what you're talking about. These people bust their asses. This is a hard job.

Mr. Pink: So is working at McDonald's but you don't feel the need to tip them, do you? Why not? They're serving you food. But no, society says don't tip those guys over there but tip these guys over here. That's bullshit.

Mr. White: Waitressing is the number 1 occupation for female non-college graduates in this country. Its the one job basically any woman can get and make a living on. The reason is the tips.

Mr. Pink: Fuck all that. I mean, I'm very sorry the government taxes their tips. That's fucked up but that ain't my fault. I mean, it would appear that waitresses are one of the many groups that the government fucks in the ass on a regular basis. I mean, if you show me a piece of paper that says the government shouldn't do that I'll sign it. Put it to a vote, I'll vote for it, but what I won't do is play ball. And as for this non-college bullshit you're giving me, I've got two words for that: learn to fucking type. 'Cause if you're expecting me to help out with the rent you're in for a big fucking surprise.

Mr. Orange: He's convinced me. Give me my dollar back.

Nice Guy Eddie: Leave the dollars there.

[Joe returns from paying the bill.]

Joe: Alright Ramblers, let's get rambling. Wait a minute. Who didn't throw in?

Mr. Orange: Mr. Pink

Joe: Mr. Pink. Why not?

Mr. Orange: He don't tip.

Joe: [to Pink] You don't tip. What do you mean you don't tip?

Mr. Orange: He don't believe in it.

Joe: [to Orange] Shut up. [to Pink] What do you mean you don't believe in it? Come on you. Cough up a buck you cheap bastard. I paid for your goddamned breakfast.

Mr. Pink: Alright, since you paid for breakfast, I'll put in, but normally I would never do this.

Joe: Never mind what you normally would do. Just cough in your goddamned buck like everyone else

[warrrreagl]

I think we've all learned a great deal by this thread (I know I have). As a result of many of the things I've learned here, my wife and I have cautiously resumed tipping again.

I'd like to close with the contents of an e-mail I received from a friend who is a corp. exec. with Applebee's. Here are his definitive thoughts about tipping:


<<My official view on tipping is this.

Servers only make $2.13 an hour. It is extremely rare if one would make more than that. So, yes. Servers are dependent on their tips for putting food on the table.

If the service is horrible, and I know it is the servers fault, I will not leave a good tip. I have always tipped my servers. Now, if the entire experience is a cluster, then I might not leave a tip at all. I think I have done that one time. The best thing to do if there is an issue while trying to enjoy your dining experience is to try to get the owner/manager involved so the entire experience is not shot to hell.

It is common courtesy to leave a tip. 15% to 20% is what you should leave your server or bartender. Remember. If your next bag of diapers or jar of baby food was dependent on what your next table left you for a tip, I would definitely remember the guests face the next time they came into the restaurant. People who leave good tips will be remembered.

A server lives off their tips. The average server paycheck (the hours they worked making $2.13 an hour) one would receive every two weeks is around 50-60 dollars. Think about that one.>>

[SaltPork]

I used to be a manager at an Applebee's-type restaurant. I know how much it sucks to get stiffed or to be screamed at by a customer. The bottom line is, yes you are there to be served food by someone, but you don't own them while you are there. Their hourly wage totally sucks, so they need their tips. Having said that, if the service sucks, the tip needs to reflect that.

I am disturbed the comments of some that seem to imply that servers are lesser people or that they are beneath you in some way because they are bringing you food. If you are in a rush to get out the door, then tell the server that when you get there. This is one of the reasons I have grown to hate people. Everyone is impatient and rude to each other for no reason. It sucks and is one of the reasons I left the restaurant business. I don't need some jackass screaming at me because his soup was cold.....

Apparently I still have some issues I need to deal with...end rant.

[Peetster]

I'm a heavy tipper. It brings me joy to see someones face light up with a huge grin. It costs basically nothing when you see what you get out of it.

Tipped my barber $20 on the holidays. She would have bore my children after that. Tipped the barkeep $20 as well. I'll never wait for a drink again. If the waitperson does a great job we'll each usually throw a ten spot for a nice big tip at the end. I find that people treat you way better when you tip big, and I enjoy the extra attention to detail.

[boredjerk]

I work for tips as a driver and so tip others heavily. If my service sucks it's usually not my fault. Complain about it too much or stiff me regularly when you live far away and I'll probably steal something from your yard or trample your flowers, because you deserve it.

[Jim Kata]

I think Peetster is on to it. If you tip good you get good service. I frequent a bar in Tysons (Peetster might know where that is), and I drink all I want for $20 (including tip). Why? Because we started tipping our bartender real nice. So now he only charges us for every 3 or 4 drinks. It usually leaves a very low bill and with everyone throwing down a $20 it usually gives a very large tip to the bartender.
Same with the pizza dude (Which I am a couple of nights a week), if he is cool with me, I am cool with him. And eventually he will get big tips and this will make him/her want to make sure he gets to my house while my food is still hot so he can get that fatty tip again (monetarily speaking).
I believe that you should always tip at least 20%. Even if the service was bad. Maybe their cat died, maybe they found out they have some STD...so on and so forth. If I come back and I have the same server and the service is horrible again.....thats when I start evaluating how much the tip will be. But generally speaking, if you make some small talk to someone serving you, they will recognize your face the next time which in turn will give you better service.
Thats my story and I'm sticking to it.

[The Answer Man]

Here in Sweden, the tip is included in the bill by law, so I too find the concept of tipping very alien. Not to say that I don't slip my waiter/waitress some extra money if they've done a good job, but it's not common.

[World's King]

I go along with the Italian stereotype of over-tipping.

[braisler]

Great thread! I really enjoy hearing about different people's tipping habit, for poor service, mediocre service, and excellent service. For my part, I have found that I feel frequently "forced" into tipping for mediocre or poor service. I am not referring to establishments that will automatically add 15% gratuity onto your bill, but rather the social pressures to pity these poor individuals who work so hard on bringing us our food.

I don't know about all areas of this country (US), but I can relate some stories from my own experience.

I used to date a waitress. At the time we were dating, I was employed full-time as a biological scientist and she was working tables part-time while attending school. She did not work at a really nice restaurant where the bills, and therefore tips, were high. She worked at a local BBQ place that was really just a step above fast food. Sure, she got stiffed from time to time. Sure, she got the occassional $1-2 tip from a table of six. But when it came to the bottom line, she always, and I mean ALWAYS, made more money per week than I did. As a college graduate in a professional career, I was being outearned by my girlfriend who hadn't finished her degree yet. It didn't bother me and our finances weren't combined anyway, but it did make me take notice.

What's more, her money was almost all in cash. She (and other waitstaff that I have known) would always claim exactly 50% of the tips they had actually gotten for the night on their tip sheets for taxes. She would average $12-15 per hour and that $2.30 that the BBQ place paid her... well that was what she used to pay her taxes with at the end of the year.

Obviously, I don't think that the waitstaff (at least in my town) are doing all that poorly, or even just scraping by. The truth is that many of them are making enough to put themselves through school without student loans. That is great! I wish more student would have the guts to work instead of taking a handout and ending up in debt (but we'll save that for another thread.)

I guess the point of my story is this: I don't like being made to feel sorry for and feel obligated to tip people who are just doing their job. I've actually approached on occasion by a waiter who I left 'only' a 10% tip asking if there was anything wrong with the service. Yeah, obviously there was, but very poor form on his part to follow a customer and ask after it.

I'll shut up for now and let other people get their say in.

[crfpilot]

As a former waiter, I know that the way to get remembered is by tipping too low or by tipping high and your service next time depends on it. I gernerally tip 20% for good service, 10% for bad, but will go as high as 50-75% for outstanding service.

[dasixth]

I pretty much always leave a tip because it is not easy work and is greatly unappreciated. If they are decent I leave them a decent tip. If they are personable and really on the ball, or if they really run there butt offI leave a very nice tip. I never go by the "standard rules for tipping".

I have been known to leave nothing but crumbs though when someone gives really bad service. It doesn't happen too often though.

Thank God people at fast food places don't have to survive off tips! That seems to get worse every day!

[sonofleemarvin]

I worked as a waiter for several years in high school at a pretty classy joint. I made good money, but I did have to work my ass off for it -- waiting tables is NOT easy. I approached each table with every intention of being a great waiter (and therefore getting a great tip), but there were always a few people who found many, many things to complain about. If a customer really acted like an ass, I gave up trying to be a good waiter very fast-- I knew that my tip would suffer for it, but I had to keep some dignity.
I still tip at every restaurant, and stay around 15 - 20 percent. I honestly believe that we would have a MUCH better society if everyone worked as a waiter/waitress,even if only for a little while... It teaches you humility, and teaches you to treat people better generally.

[Ratso]

Tipping is NOT a city in China.