So, he's going to spend so much attention and energy on an inanimate object because people spend so much attention and energy on an inanimate object?

I wonder... is all the attention and energy really about the ring or is the ring just a physical symbol of something else? Something you can't point to proudly and say look!

My avatar is my wedding band. I rather like it. I never wore a ring before and I haven't taken this one off in many months, mostly because it has created a callus that would have to be removed with the ring. I'm a bit of a metallurgic nerd and was able to specify the titanium alloy and finish I wanted and thus I never have to take it off. (practical)

My wife has never been a 'ooh, look at my ring' sort of woman. In fact, we downsized her diamond because she decided it protruded too much. She still turns the stone to the inside when she puts on surgical gloves (practical) However, once the engagement ring was on her finger she happily noted how she doesn't get hit on nearly as much as she used to. (useful)

Also, I am a ethno-canada-centrist, and I was willing to pay an arbitrary premium to purchase a Canadian mined and finished diamond.

Sure, they are small insignificant objects, but they are full of (useful) symbolism and meaning. Socially, they serve a real purpose.

I think rings can be beautiful and symbolic, but I also gag when I hear women yammering on about their expensive wedding rings. The symbolism of your marriage should be a personal happiness, not something you brag about around the water cooler.

Funny though, given this thread, we've spent more energy reacting to his one post than he has (considering he hasn't logged in for a couple of days, and hasn't commented at all since the OP).

Jinn, if you're going to start a thread, don't abandon it.

I'm going to start a thread: "People who hate on people who hate rings... I hate them." And then I'm going to post to it 100 times.

Then I'll follow it up with: "People who hate intolerance....aren't they just being intolerant!?"

Anyway...rings don't piss me off. I just don't like that it's always the 2nd or 3rd question I get asked about my wedding. We didn't do rings.

Well, if you thought people were spending an inordinate amount of energy on something stupid, wouldn't you think it was reasonable to spend an equal amount of energy to quell said stupidity?

I don't know...

It's hard to point to your ring and say "Look! He loves me so much he got me this ring!" At least, it's had to do that for any length of time. Presumably, the conversation will turn to their actual relationship and not the ring...

Then again, it's easy to point to your ring and say "Look! See how big the diamond is? ...and it's pure gold." He got it from so and so and it cost this much and it's really unique and can't be found anywhere else and it's cut just so and... works really well as a symbol of wealth and status.

Now, I'm not saying there's anything wrong with showing off your money, I'm just saying lets not euphemize it.


Personally, I've never understood symbols. As far as I can tell, I don't have any (beyond utilitary ones). For example, I would never die over a piece of cloth and I think anyone who would is badly misguided...

But isn't a symbol of wealth and status something that some people aspire to in a relationship? People make all sorts of conspicuous purchases for all sorts of reasons. Boiled down, those purchases all have symbolic meaning. They say something about who you want people to think you are.

In that case, I would say the argument against rings that was made in the OP has little to do with rings per se and everything to do with how the OP feels about conspicuous consumption.

This does not change the fact that a ring can be symbolic of love and commitment as I have argued above. Rather it underscores how love has been, to some extent, commodified in our culture.

WOW. I've never disagreed with anything less, ever.:love:

Thank you, KnifeMissile.

That's definitely the best way to put it.

Yet you took the trouble to create an avatar ... obviously, symbolism has some degree of importance to you, as it does to most people since the Cro-Magnons.

I know what a symbol is and generally recognize one when I see one.

Here, I'll quote myself except that I'm going to leave in all that pesky context that you seem to dislike:I have an avatar so that people can, more easily, see which posts belong to me. It reveals a little something about my interests but does little beyond that. It doesn't hold any particular importance or meaning beyond its utility.

Obviously, I use symbols all the time but they don't mean anything to me beyond their literal symbolism.

Just to bring this back to the OP. Based on the one brief reply we've had from Jinn, it seems that it isn't rings per se that are the problem, just wedding and engagement rings...

If that's the case, I would say that this hatred is just a symbol of something more deep-seated in Jinn.

It may be a symptom of something but I don't think it's a symbol...

I don't think it's wedding and engagement rings that JinnKai has a problem with. For instance, if girls were to swoon over a ring that happened to not be a wedding or engagement ring, I think that JinnKai would still have a problem with it. If I were to guess, I'd say that what he hates is that some useless piece of metal around one's finger is so important to some people that they must do what they can to bring so much attention to it and it, specifically. It may be one thing to talk about an important event for you, like your wedding, but to talk about the ring, specifically, instead of talking about, say, what the ring is supposed to symbolize is asinine.

That's just a guess...


As another personal aside, I've never liked jewellery. I don't think it adds to anyone's appearance and I especially don't like wearing it, myself. Having said that, I do enjoy fashion, even if my fashion sense differs from the rest of the world's...

Thank you, yet again. Said much more eloquently than I could.

I dislike rings for a completely different reason than what everyone else has been talking about. I hate them because they hurt when you try holding hands with your boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife.

Man, I really hate rings too. I hate when I'm like, walking along and a rings comes out of nowhere and I am forced to listen to it!

It's like, put your phones on vibrate, goddamn it!

OK. Now we are getting somewhere in terms of understand just what was meant by the OP (because it really wasn't clear before now).

I go back to my original comment which was:

I still argue that it is not the ring that is the issue. Rather it is a dislike of people who like rings. Otherwise you might as well hate *any* big ticket item that people gush about (cars, houses, travel, clothing, etc.).

Get over yourself. Stop being such a hater. Your negativity is hurting no one but you.

i'm not a huge jewelery fan but i do apperciate it. on a daily basis, just my gold necklace and a cheap target sports watch for work (busted too many to risk ruining a nice sports watch). don't wear my wedding band (gold w/ 1/2 ct. in 7 stones) to work do to risks on the job. but at the same time i don't put it on as soon as i get home. i tend to only wear it when my wife and i go out.

whats really sad is my ring has more diamonds than my wife's. bad, hubby, bad

/looks for new ring for wifey
//she didn't get me that ring until a year and a half later

I have nothing against rings. I despise the materialistic attitude and enculturated insecurity that leads people to believe that more money spent equals loving them more. In my eyes spending ridiculous amounts of money on someone looks like an insecure person trying to buy another's affection. Sentiment speaks louder than money, if all that matters is the money, it's just shallow and mindless conformity to stupid expectations.

i can't say i hate them, but there are NOT my best friend. they do cost way too much money & that kinda pisses me off. what annoys me the most is that they always seem to be in the way. like they are just there, either they are too tight or too loose.

but mostly the image they have just pisses me off. like why are woman so happy to say a rock are their best friend? okay, men get a dog & we get a rock. what is that? i don't get it.

I don't know this post doesn't make much sense to me. I've never hates anything purely on my instinct to hate it before.