Is it wrong to take offense to . . . anything?
 

I consider myself somewhat open-minded. My life is very non-conventional in some respects, and you might notice that this is my first post outside of the Wayside in quite a while. However, once in a while I end up feeling ostracized from my friends because something they think is awesome is just kind of gross to me.

Example:

A clip on Ebaum's world of a kid throwing up on roadkill. I thought it was just kinda pointless and gross. All my friends thought it was awesome and wondered why I was being weird.

A friend of mine likes to pose hypothetical questions. One is "If you had sex with your dad, would you rather be on top or bottom?" I think that sort of question is gross. My other friends like them and find them hilarious.

I don't harass my friends about liking what they like. I just don't get it, and then I feel bad for not liking it too. I'm sick of being the "uptight" one. Am I really that weird?

No, you're not weird. You just have different standards than your friends. It happens all the time.

I laughed when I read that sex with dad joke. Only a true jackass could think that one up. Hehehehe.

So do you think you take offense to these things or are you just disinterested?

There was a time when a couple buddies and I would sit around and think up those really stupid hypothetical questsion and then dare to answer them. We've grown out of it. Maybe you have too.

So true...

Taste in everything from music, tv, humor and others vary per people mainly cos everyone got its own way of seeing life and different personality...

You're not weird, you're just not like them...

No worries to have...

I think you've got better things to do then wonder why you don't wanna answer dad love questions.


Honest answer from me :

Yeah you may be uptight. But uptight to that group. There's a plethora of individuals and groups out there that you wouldn't be close to be uptight about.
Hell you might change from the mature one to the childlike curious one.

Maybe certain other individuals in the group would act in a way you are comfortable if you hang out with them individually.


They are you friends, and if you aren't comfortable find what makes you comfortable. If it involves them, great. If not, then tell you the truth if they are really really good friends...you guys are gonna always hang out once in a while.

Yeah, it doesn't sound like you're uptight. It sounds like you're more mature than them.

To be honest, reading the things they laugh about reminds me of the things I found funny in high school. Unless you're friends are still in high school I'd say that they're a bit immature.

I think JJ hit it right on the head. Of course, I have friends that have that maturity level in their late 20's... *sigh* But, they're still good people, sometimes we just don't see eye to eye.

Hmmmm....well then I must be REALLY uptight because I never found that sort of stuff funny.

You've probably just grown out of that sort of jokes, which in my opinion is a good thing.

You just seem to have a different sense of humor than your friends. Doesn't make you wierd, them right, you uptight, them immature you smarter or them more fun. It just means you have some different tastes than them. Apparently you share some things in common or you wouldn't be friends. We all don't have to subscribe to the same belief systems of others, just recognize them and accept them.

Edit: I didn't so much mean accept these particular people's belief systems, just recogognize them and accept that they have them. More or less...

I agree....in particular with Halx...do you take offense as in get angry or upset, or is it just irritating to you?if its the latter you are maybe just possesing a more 'matured' sense of humour.

this reminds me (bit off topic) of a night a couple weeks ago i was at a friends house for a gathering,people were drunk (and other things) and talking alot about life as often happens in this sort of setting.
they were talking about how wonderful humankind are, how we are brilliant andd have done soem wonderful things and how we have th power to do anything...
now the subject matter isnt the point here, buit i disagreed with them completely...i think humans do some terrible things and ido not beleive we have any power as such in the way these folk were talking...we cannot stop the cycle of life going the way it always has..I just felt like i didnt fit because i disagreed.
I realise now it does not particularly matter!but at the time i was thinking 'bliddy hell am i an outcast among these people or what!'lol

Just Different ... Thats All
 

we are all just different ... plain and simple

do you think some of your friends feel the same way you do, when their humor, opinions, (etc.), differ from yours?
if your not comfortable around these people, at any given time, should you look to expand your circle of friends ... ?

i do think compatible "sense of humors" are a vital part of any friendship though ... :thumbsup:

For the puking video, I just kinda went "Ew" and told them I didn't get it. They kept cracking up and explaining that it was a guy puking on roadkill which I understood but didn't see the intrinsic value in. I admit I have refered to my friend that makes the questions as "sick" (not to his face), but in my defense he does talk a lot about killing or torturing people and incest/pedophillia. Sometimes I get creeped out by his lighthearted attitude towards the topics. I mostly get upset when my friends seem not to understand why I don't like it, makes me feel like I'm wrong. Example:

Me: Well, there's that and the 'fucking your dad' style questions.
Friend: those are hilarious!! you know you don't ACTUALLY have to fuck your dad, right?
Me: I know, but it's gross. I mean, am I totally out of bounds by saying that I don't like thinking about having sex with my own father? that's what pisses me off. Any more you're uptight if you're offended by anything.
Friend: you know you don't actually have to think about doing it either, right?

You see? There's just sort of a disconnect. It's like nobody understands how the subject matter itself could be unpleasant to discuss. I guess all I'm looking for is for one of my friends to say "I see how you could feel that way", let me feel okay about not liking that.

Hate to be the devil's advocate, but maybe your friends don't see how you could feel that way, at all. There's a multitude of reasons why that may be, and judging from your friend's reaction (if that is a real response, forgive me if it's not) there doesn't seem to be much of a chance of them doing so in the future.

There are lots of different types of people, and lots of different types of humor.

Some people like crude humor, some only enjoy lighter humor. Some people really like morbid or absurdist humor. I wouldn't necessarily say it's a lack of maturity on their part, or even that you're more mature for not finding it funny.

Their REASONS, however, for finding it funny may be indicative of lowered maturity. It just depends.

I'm about as uptight as they come when it comes to interactions such as you describe. All of the things in your OP would be things that would turn me off quite quickly. But that's OK, it just means that it's not my taste.

You don't have to like everything your friends like. You only have to share enough interests that those things that bring you together outweight those things that push you apart. Don't sweat it your friends sometimes do some things that aren't to your taste. If they do these things more often than you're comfortable with, then perhaps it means you've outgrown that sort of thing and it's time to move on. Don't beat yourself up. It's ok not to share every interest your friends have. The people in my family love me dearly but cannot fathom my near obsession with comic books. My sister and wife love sports. They spent the evening tonight watching some hockey game I couldn't care less about and don't understand. It's ok to have different tastes from your friends. It's only when core values conflict, or you don't share enough with them any longer that it should give you pause.

Gilda

Yea, I used to be totally disgusted with a lot of things my friends, and associates find funny.. Then I learned the best way not to get offended is join in, and turn it around on them.

I don't know, humor is humor, you either join in or you dont, totally up to you though.

LOLOLOLOLOLOL....I think I just peed...I, like your friends, found that hilarious.

Clearly you're more sensitive than the rest of the sick bastards. Just chalk it up to being different, ignore their stupidity. If it really bugs you, find new friends, otherwise enjoy them being stupid for what it is.

I think I'd have to be on top, I doubt I'd be up for much lifting after digging a six-foot-deep hole.

Puking on roadkill? I don't see anything particularly funny about it, and your friends shouldn't be going to ebaum's World anyway.

you are not "uptight"

i know that i am open-minded to a point as well.. but if someone were to ask me:
i'd feel a little uneasy. that's not the greatest image in my head if you ask me.

as for the roadkill bit.. it seems a little immature, but at the same time.. who am i to judge.. some people like things that others don't.

I get called uptight a lot by people because I have a fairly high set of morals, values, standards and self respect. These I hold myself to before making a point to surround myself by people of like minds.

However, when the people that call me uptight are starring in an episode of Jerry Springer, I will be sitting back enjoying my nice "boring" (to them) life and my slice of the american dream pie.

The things that they do and may find funny can potentially lead them into bad situations with no logical way out. Consider yourself lucky and keep doing what youre doing.

Remember, you ultimately answer to yourself and YOU are the one that YOU have to live with for as long as you are here.

wow! that's the best advice i've seen in a really long time! that couldn't have been said any better.. :)

I think they're point is that humor that crosses lines, doesn't necesarily translate to crossing morals.

Actually sleeping with your dad... That would cross morals. Asking a random hypothetical question about it... Not so much...