I want a love drug! - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

JustJess · 02-14-2006, 11:08 AM

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Romance may be tied to reward system that can cause addiction

People all over the world describe falling in love in similar terms: euphoria, exhilaration, elation.

It's an intense craving for the person they adore. But just how does the brain process romantic love?

Anthropologist Helen Fisher, author of "Why We Love," studied the brain circuitry that makes falling in love the intense, passionate emotion it is. She found that the brain sees romantic love as a reward, stimulating activity in the same areas that light up when a person seeks any kind of a reward, whether it's chocolate, money or drugs.

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The participants were put into an MRI machine and asked to stare at photographs of their sweethearts and then neutral photos that called for no positive or negative feelings. When the researchers were able to look inside the brain in love, they said they were struck by the results.

The part of the brain that lit up the strongest was that associated with rewards and pleasure, a finding not nearly as poetic as romantics would have thought. It turns out that, to the brain, love is just another reward, much like chocolate or money, or like a drug to an addict. This brain system gets used every time you want something.

Romantic love, it turns out, is a reward, the researchers say.

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When Brown started the study, she said she thought she was studying a strong positive emotion.

"Now I have changed the way I think about early-stage romantic love," she said. "It's a motivation; the person [we're in love with] is a goal. Emotions come and go. We feel euphoria, but we feel anxiety, too. This core system that is driving the person who is in love toward their sweetheart, that is much more important in a sense than an emotion."

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Fisher agreed: "Romantic love is not only an emotion, it's a basic mating drive, and it's stronger than the sex drive."

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Although the early characteristics of romantic love don't last forever -- the pounding heart, the obsessive thinking and craving -- in good relationships they will transfer to a different level, a stage of love called "attachment," Fisher said.

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In her own studies of more than 800 people older than 45, Fisher found that they showed just as much romantic passion as those under 25.

In fact, romantic love can be triggered at any age. Fisher said she interviewed an 8-year-old boy who perfectly described his intense passion for an 8-year-old girl. She said she also knows couples in their 70s and 80s who are madly in love.

Whether you've got a sweetie for the day or not, whether you like VDay or not... Love is an interesting state. I think this article is right on, actually - who can argue that they're not in an altered state when they're in the first flush of love? *Everything* seems better when you're in love. Whether it is or not is another discussion entirely.

Have you experienced things this way in your life? Are you in love? Do you enjoy being in love? Any withdrawal symptoms?

I used to have a friend that told me they were addicted to being in love, the first blush of the intense crush... and kept breaking up with people once the infatuation wore off. Guess they never made it to the next stage...

LazyBoy · 02-14-2006, 02:16 PM

All love has ever gotten me is hurt...

But then again, while its good, its great....so its a twisted game of pros and cons....guess the weight system is in the eye of the beholder

-Will

Giant Hamburger · 02-14-2006, 02:22 PM

Love is a symbiotic parasite that intertwines with your guts.
It must be fed or its coils tighten.

Chest bursting is possible.

flat5 · 02-14-2006, 02:28 PM

It's always been a one way street.
Love hurts and I have to avoid it.

Jove · 02-14-2006, 02:32 PM

Eat enough chocolate and you too will feel euphoric and elated.

Charlatan · 02-14-2006, 03:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Giant Hamburger

Love is a symbiotic parasite that intertwines with your guts.
It must be fed or its coils tighten.

Chest bursting is possible.

This is a very good example of why I love the hamburger... it is the best explaination of love I have seen today.

maleficent · 02-14-2006, 03:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Giant Hamburger

Love is a symbiotic parasite that intertwines with your guts.
It must be fed or its coils tighten.

Chest bursting is possible.

NOW that is COOL..

umm- burg... I love ya man... but -- we don't want to see home movies when the meatball arrives...

Rubyee · 02-15-2006, 07:05 PM

Yeah, sure, I miss the feeling that you get in those first couple of months- a flittery stomach every time he holds your hand- the feeling that you just can't have enough sex.

I DON'T miss, however, the wondering if you said the wrong thing, wondering if your parts are making too much noise during sex, wanting to ask or tell things but not feeling confident enough yet, worrying about coming on too strong, waiting for the phone to ring.

Its nice to be comfortable with someone to the point of having a great night with them just by sitting in the same room soaking up the other person's company.

sadistikdreams · 02-15-2006, 09:09 PM

Wow. That's actually a really good article.

It does make sense, though. I've always thought of love as a "drug".

And I've taken drugs to simulate the feeling of "love".

It's unfullfilling, doing drugs. It's selfish.

Love on the other hand, is something between 2 people.

I believe it's a feeling you can never top.

JustJess · 02-16-2006, 06:21 AM

I like the euphoria feelings - for that reason, it's fun to have a harmless crush. But really, at the end of the day, I need me some Quadro time. Uncomplicated, quality, TV is awesome for a date night, Quadro time.

BigBen · 02-16-2006, 06:28 AM

Jeez, Jess, when you put it like that, I wouldn't mind some Quadro time either...

I love the feeling of the "Good Heart Attack". Can't catch your breath, can't see straight, can't hear. Heart pounding, mile-a-minute, everything tingly.

...sigh...

Charlatan · 02-16-2006, 06:32 AM

The cool thing is, that when it's right, you can still feel this way... even after 18 years.

JustJess · 02-16-2006, 06:38 AM

Ben, I believe everyone needs some Quadro time.

Yep, 9 years and still mushy over here! It's disgusting, I know. Too bad.

02-14-2006, 02:16 PM	#2 (permalink)
LazyBoy Insane Location: Memphis Area	All love has ever gotten me is hurt... But then again, while its good, its great....so its a twisted game of pros and cons....guess the weight system is in the eye of the beholder -Will __________________ Life is nothing, everything.....and something in between...

02-15-2006, 07:05 PM	#8 (permalink)
Rubyee I'm baaaaack!	Yeah, sure, I miss the feeling that you get in those first couple of months- a flittery stomach every time he holds your hand- the feeling that you just can't have enough sex. I DON'T miss, however, the wondering if you said the wrong thing, wondering if your parts are making too much noise during sex, wanting to ask or tell things but not feeling confident enough yet, worrying about coming on too strong, waiting for the phone to ring. Its nice to be comfortable with someone to the point of having a great night with them just by sitting in the same room soaking up the other person's company. __________________ You don't know from fun.

02-16-2006, 06:21 AM	#10 (permalink)
JustJess Unencapsulated Location: Kittyville	I like the euphoria feelings - for that reason, it's fun to have a harmless crush. But really, at the end of the day, I need me some Quadro time. Uncomplicated, quality, TV is awesome for a date night, Quadro time. __________________ My heart knows me better than I know myself, so I'm gonna let it do all the talkin'.

02-16-2006, 06:28 AM	#11 (permalink)
BigBen Comedian Location: Use the search button	Jeez, Jess, when you put it like that, I wouldn't mind some Quadro time either... I love the feeling of the "Good Heart Attack". Can't catch your breath, can't see straight, can't hear. Heart pounding, mile-a-minute, everything tingly. ...sigh... __________________ 3.141592654 Hey, if you are impressed with my memorizing pi to 10 digits, you should see the size of my penis.

02-16-2006, 06:32 AM	#12 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	The cool thing is, that when it's right, you can still feel this way... even after 18 years. __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

02-14-2006, 02:22 PM	#3 (permalink)
Giant Hamburger Gastrolithuanian Location: low-velocity Earth orbit	Love is a symbiotic parasite that intertwines with your guts. It must be fed or its coils tighten. Chest bursting is possible.

02-14-2006, 02:28 PM	#4 (permalink)
flat5 Very Insignificant Pawn Location: Amsterdam, NL	It's always been a one way street. Love hurts and I have to avoid it.

02-14-2006, 02:32 PM	#5 (permalink)
Jove Groovy Hipster Nerd Location: Michigan	Eat enough chocolate and you too will feel euphoric and elated.

02-15-2006, 09:09 PM	#9 (permalink)
sadistikdreams lonely rolling star Location: Seattle.	Wow. That's actually a really good article. It does make sense, though. I've always thought of love as a "drug". And I've taken drugs to simulate the feeling of "love". It's unfullfilling, doing drugs. It's selfish. Love on the other hand, is something between 2 people. I believe it's a feeling you can never top.

02-16-2006, 06:38 AM	#13 (permalink)
JustJess Unencapsulated Location: Kittyville	Ben, I believe everyone needs some Quadro time. Yep, 9 years and still mushy over here! It's disgusting, I know. Too bad. __________________ My heart knows me better than I know myself, so I'm gonna let it do all the talkin'.