No more dutch oven
 

A bit of history: Max and I flew to see my parents last week, and I guess I grabbed a "complimentary" copy of SkyMall from the plane and put it in with his books on one of the flights. The_Wife was unpacking that bag today, saw this product and sent me this link.

Last night, I was, to be nice, tooty. I tried to be good about it and at least walk out of the room, but a couple got away from me. After she handed me a peeing little boy (front-facing, no less), I threatened her with a dutch oven. In case you're either not a pig like me or know one of us, a dutch oven involves farting in bed then holding the sheets over your partner's head, trapping them with your own most personal of scents.

She is threatening to buy one of these to keep me from ever doing that to her again.

The between the sheets fan. It's designed to give you that little bit of fresh air while you're breathing in last night's bean and broccoli surprise.

This polar bear just found himself a summer gift.

even cold bastards need warm homes.

What will they think of next!

NOOOOO!!! No, God, NO! They have it ALL WRONG!!!!
:eek:
You MUST have the fan blowing out the FOOT of the bed!!
This dangerous method will only blow the fart back up toward you and your unfortunate partner's faces!! Good Lord!!!
The Humanity!!!!
:shakehead:

it looks like you'll have to move to the more direct ass-to-face approach