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Let me add my voice to the "living will" crowd. Absolutely if someone wants to be put out of their misery at a certain point, their wishes should be respected. Failing some indication of what their wishes are, then you just have to make the best decision you can. We had to go through this with my brother when he died - thinking about what he would have wanted, the kind of life he would have had, what he would have been happy with. It's a hard choice, especially if not everyone in the family agrees, but chances are the person's wishes would be pretty clear even if they didn't make them official. We all knew at a certain point that my brother wouldn't have wanted to live the life that his body would have confined him to. Fortunately, we never had to make the choice - he made it for us.
When you think about it, we do better by our pets than we sometimes do by humans. Why should we cling to life beyond all hope when we're suffering? There are some things that are worse than death, both for the person suffering and for those around them.
I hope your family finds a solution that leaves everyone peaceful and satisfied that they've done the right thing.
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"If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."
- Anatole France
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