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I spit in an ex roomate's food.
She was a bitch who never did anything she was supposed to. (like buy toilet paper when it was her turn, or clean the bathroom on her scheduled week, etc.) So, I was drunk, I saw her vegetable dip in the fridge, and I spit in it. Not something I'm proud of...but it was pretty funny.
Actually, I have another revenge story about the same girl. She used to flit around from guy to guy on a rather small campus. (not mine, a private school that I refer to as "Big High School") Anyway, she dumped one for the other after a week, and so the first guy pissed on the second guy (a rich asshole's) beloved Audi. Yeah, it was pretty funny.
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"With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy."
-Desiderata
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