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thingstodo · 02-14-2004, 10:51 AM

Allright, dude, it's time for some tough love in multiple directions. I think I'm a little qualified since I smoked pot for many years and haven't for 5 or so just because I work out and ride a bike seriously. I also quit smoking 15 years ago. And more to the point, my oldest son is a recovering (for life) heroin addict. I've delt with that situation for 5 years now.

You have no right as an addict to point fingers at your mother. And it won't get you anywhere until she decides to do something different herself. I also don't understand where you get off saying you'll stop in the future. I can tell you drinking is more harmful and addicting in and of itself than pot smoking. And since you have a family history working here you are sure to have serious problems soon if not already.

The only way to get an addict's attention is to let them live with the consequences of their actions. So your best course of action is to walk away from her but let her know why.

Also, if you stopped spending money on drinking and cigs (now about a $2,000-2,500/year habit just for the cigs alone), you might have enough to live on your own. The only way I would have let one of my kids live at home is if they were a full time student maiking decent grades - and for no other reasons.

Sorry to be preachy. I'm not religious, just a realist. You might consider getting help for yourself first.

Hope some of this helps and things work out for you.

02-14-2004, 10:51 AM	#43 (permalink)
thingstodo A Storm Is Coming Location: The Great White North	Allright, dude, it's time for some tough love in multiple directions. I think I'm a little qualified since I smoked pot for many years and haven't for 5 or so just because I work out and ride a bike seriously. I also quit smoking 15 years ago. And more to the point, my oldest son is a recovering (for life) heroin addict. I've delt with that situation for 5 years now. You have no right as an addict to point fingers at your mother. And it won't get you anywhere until she decides to do something different herself. I also don't understand where you get off saying you'll stop in the future. I can tell you drinking is more harmful and addicting in and of itself than pot smoking. And since you have a family history working here you are sure to have serious problems soon if not already. The only way to get an addict's attention is to let them live with the consequences of their actions. So your best course of action is to walk away from her but let her know why. Also, if you stopped spending money on drinking and cigs (now about a $2,000-2,500/year habit just for the cigs alone), you might have enough to live on your own. The only way I would have let one of my kids live at home is if they were a full time student maiking decent grades - and for no other reasons. Sorry to be preachy. I'm not religious, just a realist. You might consider getting help for yourself first. Hope some of this helps and things work out for you. __________________ If you're wringing your hands you can't roll up your shirt sleeves. Stangers have the best candy.