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porche: speaking from experience, FOLLOW YOUR HEART! I married my son's father when he was 6-years-old. I wanted him to experience having a "real family." Dad was raising twins from a previous marriage so by marrying I was bringing the entire family together. What did I get? Well, I gained two step sons who I now have good relationships with, but were very difficult to raise. I gained a father for my son who never bothered to parent him -- but just let me parent all three kids. I have two more children who I now get to raise with Lebell -- not him. Why, because I didn't marry for love, I married out of obligation. And it wasn't worth it! He gambled, cheated and became an alcoholic. I was the excuse for all his problems. I tried and tried to hang in there because I thought it was best for the children; but it is not! They did not (and neither does Helen) deserve the stress of an unhealthy relationship.
When I chose divorce, I figured that was it for me. I'm also "chubby" and very strong willed. I was ready for a life alone. But, there are men out there who truly accept us and love us for who we are -- not for what they want. (Like a mother for their children.) Lebell is a true blessing in my life. He accepts me 100% for me. He is healthy, loving, kind and thrilled to help me raise the girls.
Don't settle -- it isn't worth it! You deserve better -- you deserve "true love!" (That said, if this man is your true love, then by all means, go for it! It just doesn't sound that way to me.)
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If you can go deeply into lovemaking, the ego disappears. That is the beauty of lovemaking, that it is another source of a glimpse of god
It's not about being perfect; it's about developing some skill at managing imperfection.
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