Who need naked chicks wrestling? We have Pune Tang!!
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I haven't done this in a while, so here goes:
SPLEENS PICKS FOR WWE'S COBRANDED PPV - THE ROYAL RUMBLE - BROTHAAAAAAAAAAAA....
(match list is according to royalrumble.wwe.com, not neccessarily in the order of the actual ppv which is happening tomorrow)
1) Hardcore Holly vs. the Defending WWE Champion Brock Lesnar.
Right. They are going to give Holly the title. HAH.
Winner: Lesnar with no broken neck.
2) HBK vs. Defending Heavyweight Champion HHH.
For once, I am rooting for HHH. I mean, HBK has his moments, but his silent praying to God everytime he enters the ring, and his S&M attire as we walks down the ramp? Please. Kill me. Besides, he really isn't that good a wrestler anymore, not that he ever was.
Winner: HHH with a sledgehammer.
3) Chavo vs. Eddie in a Guerrero on Guerrero match.
Go away Chavo. I used to think you were interesting. Now you just take up space. Eddie will murderlize you.
Winner: Eddie Guerrero
4) The Royal Rumble
Now, for what should be obvious reasons, I'm hoping the V1 Hardy, The Hurricane, or Shelton Benjamin will win the Rumble and go on to challenge (and win) one of the World Title belts. However, when I come back to reality, I don't really have a good chance of any of the three winning. So after semi-careful pondering of the subject, I came to my answer. But you will get to read that after a mild-long winded diatribe on why everyone else won't win.
Kane - Eh, no one really likes him anymore, and he hasn't done anything on RAW lately.
Kurt Angle - We all know he's not 100 percent, so he can't risk injuring himself anymore than he already is
Booker T - Just like Kane, only people like the Book
Goldberg - HAH
Chris Benoit - He's going in first. Only 2(3 really) people have ever gone in first and came out last. Bret Hart (i think), Shawn Michaels (not really sure), and the British Bulldog (he was number 2 in the Rumble... then again I think I could be wrong on all three of these guys). The odds are very much against him.
Scott Steiner - re: Goldberg
Billy Gunn - He's back? He's just going to get injured again, so why bother.
Christian - I'm having too much fun watching the Y2J/Trish/Christian triangle unfold. I can't risk anything to not see it come full term
Rikishi - 2 Phat. Not interesting anymore.
Chris Jericho - Re: Christian
Shelton Benjamin - PLEASE LET HIM WIN. Its not going to happen, but hey, I can hope
Mark Henry - He will lose 14 more pieces of hair in the ring.
Charlie Haas - Shoo, go away.
Rico - Will spend most of the match rubbing up on the other guys
Nunzio - SQUASH
The Hurricane - re: Shelton Benjamin
Big Show - Re: Goldberg & Scott Steiner
Spike Dudley - He will win... another concussion
Matt Morgan - Too green. Still suxx
Matt Hardy - Re: The Hurricane & Shelton Benjamin
Tajiri - Is and always a cruiserweight
Test - Well, Steiner IS in the rumble... nah
A-Train - Re: You know who to look for
Rene Dupree - The only good member of La Ouisistance. I should update my Favorite Wrestler list soon, he's going to be on it.
Ernest "The Cat" Miller - DANCE DANCE DANCE, DISCO INFERNO... YOU SUCK
Randy Orton - Evolution... its time for a showdown. I want Orton to have a good solid feud with someone for a few months (3 PPV's) so I can actually see how good he is. I'm not seeing it yet. Oh yeah... Mick Foley drags him over the rope and onto the floor.
Bradshaw - Not enough Steam.
Rob Van Dam - heh, right. WWE loves this guy.
Rhyno - GORE over the top rope and onto the floor
If you haven't guessed yet, the winner will be the one, the only John Cena. YOU CAN'T SEE THIS.
Winner: Cena when he floors Goldberg and Chris Benoit.
5) Dudleys vs Defending Tag Champions Evolution (flair/batista) in a Tables match
Hmm... could be close... but I think Evolution will hold the titles until WMXX.
Winner: Evolution when they send D-von through a table
6) Jaime Noble vs. Defending Cruiserweight Champino Rey Mysterio.
It should be a great match, possibly the best of the night (ignoring the obvious #1 match, The Rumble). Tons of spots, good back and forth... Nidia will be involved somehow, but:
Winner: Rey Mysterio, when Nidia realizes that her eyes were closed, and she was able to see the entire time.