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Personally I find it's hard to know if the guy is who he really seems to be. Sometimes there's the guy who has low self esteem, won't assert himself when the going gets tough but at the party tends to bluster a bit too much. Then there's the sensitive type who is quiet but when things do get rough he does stand up. I want a balance. I need a guy who isn't going to overshadow me, Who will be a good father, and who is supportive and helpful when I have a need. I don't see myself as a needy person (you'll have to ask dei37 if that's true or not) but when I do need something, support in some way, the guy who listens and does something to help me is the one I'm most attracted to.
As a married woman that can be hard when hubby is also feeling a need and is just plain unable to give me the support I need. A girl needs friends besides her man that she can turn to for help when he can't.
Otherwise - guys - just pay attention to what she needs and listen. Sometimes all a girl wants is a listening ear. Other times she needs the guy to make the stand for her. Ask and she will tell you. Oh and be yourself from the get go.
Trying to be something you are not will always get you the wrong girl and she'll become disatisfied once she realizes who you are. That bother's me a lot when a guy is putting on a show. Girls do it too. Be yourself and you'll find your match faster and easier.
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"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma. 
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