Everything had been going pretty well sine the first post of this thread. I don’t think she has gone more then 24 hours with out saying something super bitchy or rude to me, but for some reason, I am able to work through that.
Then last night happened.
Wee go to bed around 11:45 cuz she is “tired”.
I had to take a shower, so I hopped in as she got ready for bed.
When I got outta the shower, I expected her to be asleep, but to my surprise, she was awake.
I said that I had to run out to the computer for a second, and then I’d be right back. She said that if I wasn’t back in 5 minutes, we weren’t having the sex0r.
A little background on this part: I got fed up with her not sending me any signals about weather she wanted to have sex or not before. One night, it went as far as the insertion point and then she said “why are you making me do this?” I had no idea that she wasn’t in the mood, she had giving me no signals at all, infact, I thought by her body language, she was in to it. When she said that, it made me feel like a rapist, and I decided not to initiate sex again for a while, but to let her do it.
Back to last night. It was 12:14 when she said “be back in 5 mins.” I joked with her about the time for a wee bit, since she had her contacts out and couldn’t see the clock. It’s very possible that I left the room at 12:15.
When I got back to the room, it was 12:20. She said it was “too bad” that I was a minute late, and I didn’t protest, due to the prior feeling that I will not initiate it.
Well, I get in bed and I turn off the lights. She makes a comment about me “sucking at the cuddling” which I assume is her was of telling me to cuddle. So I put my arm around her. She then proceeds to make holding her very difficult, by moving around at least once every 2 mins.
Finally, she takes my hand an throws it off. I ask her why she did it, and she replies with only a grunt. I say something like “lost the ability to communicate?” and she grunts again. Then I say, “Why did you throw me hand off you?” just all straight up like that, she mumbles, “I don’t know”.
At this point, I roll over away from her and prepare to just fall asleep.
she continues laying there for a while, still tossing and turning occasionally, and then sits up, pulling all the covers off me. I again ask why she did that, and she said, “I was hot”.
I roll over again, and try to relax. By this point I could feel a major anxiety attack coming on. (I have problems with them).
Then she starts crying.
I can’t hear her actually “cry”, but she is sniffling a lot. She goes to the bathroom, doesn’t turn the light on when she goes in there, and blows her nose. She stays in there for a while.
When she came back to bed, my anxiety attack was in full swing, I could almost barley breath. I laid there for a while trying to relax, but finally decided I had to get up and get my mind off it. So I went downstairs and started a Gentoo Linux install
This morning she didn’t acknowledge the alarm, she just laid there. She didn’t acknowledge any time I rubbed her shoulders or told her I loved her.
Even when I left for work.