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Cool quote!
I think I am falling into the same trap again. there is an 18 year girl who has started work and she is going to be working with me and taking some of the work off me, I keep doing stupid things. I know it's wrong and unhelpful, but a part of me just can't stop myself
1 - showing how I have no self esteem and running myself down, just so she says "oh, dont say that, I dont think that"
2 - Acting clownish to make her laugh.
We get on really well, and we both make each other laugh a lot and stuff, but I know there is no way that she would ever look at me in a romantic way.
In a way, I probably wouldnt at her, Im 25 and she is nearly 19, so she is kind of but not quite too young - which is another thing, I feel I can be a lot more outgoing with someone I dont really anticipate there being any romance with. Plus in a way I feel sometimes maybe I almost encourage the things I know on one level will make someone not want to be with me, because its somehow safer than really wanting to get with someone and be rejected.
I mean, I know all the things people said here are true - and I'm alone now and not too confident, so getting rejected is just going to mean I'm still alone - I just find it really hard to get out of the pattern of the way I always act around girls - and I mean it is nice to make friends and get along with people, but I havent had a girlfriend for 3 years and it gets kind of lonely. There's a lot of times in life, especially when things are going better, and I think "hmm, it would be nice to be sharing this with someone"
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"Do not tell lies, and do not do what you hate,
for all things are plain in the sight of Heaven. For nothing
hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
without being uncovered."
The Gospel of Thomas
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