pyraxis

And then there are the women who are attracted to genuine confidence. I get sick of hearing guys complain about how it's a lose-lose situation, because it's not. Both the sensitive guy and the bad boy are insecure in their own ways. One is scared of rejection, so he treats women like glass while hiding and harboring any deep resentment or disagreement. It doesn't work -- you can't hide that kind of thing forever. The other is scared of losing control and letting people see that he cares about anything, so he puts up a shield and won't commit. Unfortunately sometimes women mistake this for genuine confidence.

What I, and I suspect many women, look for is someone who isn't afraid to get what they want out of life, but also isn't afraid of emotional intensity. We're not perfect. We can be fooled. But that's where a lot of this conflict comes from. And it has little to do with gender... frankly I'm surprised that men don't have the same problem. Being torn between the gentle, shy kind of girl and the aggressive party animal, I mean.

Damn, I wish there was a way to explain this without falling back on such broad generalizations.

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"Nothing is at last sacred but the integrity of your own mind." -Emerson